What You Don't Know...
My heart continues to race at a disarming speed, as I lose yet another battle to slow it down. I've tried breathing in and out-- but much to my misfortune, nothing has worked. Clearing my throat for the third time, I await a fearful voice to adhear from the other end. Shakily I grip the phone, hoping for some sort understanding, perhaps even forgiveness. False hope has been a temporary companion, ever since I slid a lonely quarter into the thin slot. Stressfully, I exhale feeling more and more vunerable by the mini-second. Then...
"Hello?" She asks, with urgency.
I freeze.
"Hello?" She asks louder.
"Bessie?" I ask timidly.
"Jo!" She exclaims, her voice cracking a little."Joey--You guys it's Joey!"
Damn. You guys?
"Bess?" I ask interrupting, as other voices chime in, either angrily, or exitedly.
"Joey, where are you guys?"She asks, as I pick up on her controlled, easy-going tone.
"You guys?" I question, prolonging the obvious.
"Yes, as in you and Pacey."
"How do you know we're together?" I ask pushing whatever luck I had left.
"Josephine Potter, if I don't see you walk in this door before dawn, I will make it my personal mission to slap your face on a milk carton, send out a search party, have them bring you home, and slowly but surely make your life a living hell. Do I make myself clear?"
So much for understanding.
"You don't have to scream at me." I say absently, looking over my shoulder for Pacey.
"Screaming? No that was not screaming. This is screaming!"
"Are you done?"
"Not even close."
"Well, if you would just calm down for a second, I could explain to you our whereabouts. Not to mention my well-thought out plan for a permenent stay. At Home that is."
"Do you know how many people you two are hurting?"
"Hurting?"
"Yes, hurting. I mean, Pacey's mother is worried sick."
"Don't--"
"And me."
"Bessie, I'm sorry."
"I'm sure you are. Now, when are you guys gonna be back here? And where are you?"
"I'll explain everything when we get back."
"I hate to inform you, but Pacey's dad has already sent out a couple of guys to hunt you guys down."
"Are you serious?"
"Yes."She says exasperated.
"Damnit." I shrill quietly, squeezing the phone even tighter as I slide down the booth in defeat.
"Where are you Joey?"She asks more softly.
"I can't tell you. It's only gonna make things worse."
"Okay, just get back here because--"
"Who all is there with you?"
"Everone you can think of." She says after a heavy sigh.
"Like..."
"Well, all the other kids are here. Dawson, Andie, Jack...Jen, who by the way you may want to make an apology to when you get back."
"Why?" I ask gradually.
"Because, presently she happens to be in in a not-so pleasant grilling session."
"What?"
"All the adults seem to be under the impression, that she in fact knows something that we don't. Which judging by the mini-scule information that she has revealed is oh say alot."
"Great."
"Oh, you are gonna be in soo much trouble when you get back."
"Well, that's become increasingly clear. Look, I'm having a hard time getting Pacey to come back home."
"Why?"
"Ask his parents."
"Is this Joey?"He asks raspily, shaking my confidence.
No.
"Yes."
"This is Pacey's father." He says stern." Now you listen, and you listen good. I want my boy back home, and soon. Now if he doesn't want to come home, you can tell him that I'm more than prepared to make sure he does so."
Umm.
"Yes, sir" I say my chest caving in.
"Now, if he's trying to avoid coming on home, and facing his problems, then I suggest you don't uphold him in that."
"I'm not upholding him in anything." I say, feeling the angst coming on.
"Well if I've wrongly accused you, than I'm sorry. But you've gotta help us help him, by getting him back home."
"You consider that helping him?"
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"Putting him on medication isn't gonna solve anything." I say, suddenly not finding much sense in my own words. I suppose they would help...if he needed them. No, that seems a little...
"I mean don't you think that's a little drastic?"
"So he told you that huh?"
"Yes, he did." I say, still on the defense.
"I guess he also told you that he's severly depressed."
"I wouldn't say he was severly depressed."
"You wouldn't?"
"No!" I say standing. "I mean--yes, he may have a minor chemical embalance or--"
"What do you know about depression?"
"Enough." I say already ready to throw in the towel. There would be no winning this conversation. Afterall...I am talking to an adult.
"Both he and his mother have reason to believe that he is." He bites.
Apparently he likes to argue.
"And why is that?" I ask hoping for a straight answer.
"Ask him."
"I will." I retort. Then focus my attention on the busy, but faceless stangers that pass by two by two. His absense has become even more lengthy, as a wave of worry, and loneliness crash into my heart.
"Hello?" She asks, uneasily grabbing my attention.
"Yeah?" I ask gradually.
"It's Jen"
"Hey."
"Hey." She says warmly. "Where the hell are you two!"
"Texas." I say aimless, then immediately eating my words. "Don't tell them that though."
"Harrasment is illegal my friend."
"I know. What all have you told them?"
"Well--" She says, as Pacey out of nowhere, approaches.
"Who are you talking to?" He asks solemnly.
"Um..." I say quickly hanging up the phone, as I can hear a loud 'Hey!' from Jen.
"Who was that?"
"Jen. I called her to see what was up."
"What was up?" He asks with a chuckle.
"Yep."
"And..."
"And--what?"
"What was Up?"He asks taking some change from his jean pocket.
"Everyone's wondering where we are."
"There's a shock." He says looking around. "You didn't say where we were did you?"
"No." I answer. "Did you have fun?"
"No. This one kid--I mean guy kept on bumping me--constantly." He says initiating a walk forward. "There was like a hint of creepy intent in his eyes."
"Maybe I should've come with you."I say sypathetically.
"Ya think? There's no way I should've suffered alone."
"Sorry. So...how can I make up for it?" I ask, giddily taking his hands in mine.
"I wonder." He says whispering and pressing his forehead against mine.
"I know." I say kissing his forehead, then his cheek.
"Don't tease me Potter."
"How's about...The merry-go-round?"
"Oh, no, no, no, you owe me remeber? I don't owe you."
"I'm serious Pacey, I haven't been on one of those since--Well forever. Pleasee."
"Anything but that." He says pulling my waist to his.
"Fine. Go hit one of those...target things, and bring me back one of those...stuffed things."
"You, you, you. It's all about you isn't it."
"Did you really expect any different?"I ask satirically.
"Fine." He says sighing.
"Come on." I say pulling him over to the tent.
"Why don't we get somethimg to eat first?"
"Pacey."
"Joey."
"Fine. But I will own one of those gargantuan bears before the night is over."
"A promise, is a promise."
"Indeed."
Walking over to the popcorn stand, I purposely try to take it all in. Soon we'll be leaving, and sadly, only I, seem to be aware of such happenings. The chilled night air, and beautiful lights that illuminate wherever you turn buries itself deep within my memoires. I'll never forget this night, and how it felt. We've been here for hours, yet it doesn't even feel like it. He's given me a thousand kisses, and I'm never tired, or wanting of his touch. He's held my hand the whole time, except when he left for fair reason. Apparently bumper cars is his favorite passtime, though it isn't mine.
Now that he's back he's not letting go, as any and all cringes I felt melt away. Alas, I'll have to confront him. Hearing Bessie's voice almost immediately snapped me back into reality, and his father--well that just about yanked me out of any and all fantasy I may have been living in. Unready for his reaction, I know for sure he'll be mad. God, I hope Jen doesn't tell anyone where we are. I have to be the one to do this, not them.
"Gracias." He says to the man, handing me a small bag, as we carry on.
"You okay?" He asks nudging me.
"Huh? Oh, Yeah. Yes, I am fine."
"You don't look fine."
"Trust me. I've never been better."I say, hoping he can see through the thin veil of the sentence.
"Good." He says simply. "Listen you um--You ready to go?"
"Kind of."
"Alrighty then, come on." He says taking my hand, as we head off to the car.
He smiles weakly, and opens the passenger seat door letting me in.
"After you."
"How feministic."
"Hey..." He begins, but stops as if he forgot what he was going to say, or as if he just doesn't care enough to finish it.
"No witty retortoic?"
"I'm afraid not."
"You feeling okay?" I ask placing my hand on his forehead.
"Peachy."
"So, where are you taking me."
"Funny choice of words considering..."
"Considering what?"
"I'm taking you--as you so cleverly put it to a motel."
"I'm sorry, did you just say you're taking me to a motel?"
"No?"
"I don't think so Pacey. I mean, do you even have enough money for--"
"A couple nights-- Yes."
"No way."
"Well, we need somewhere to sleep."
"Define sleep." I say eyeing him.
"Don't be so classist." He says starting the engine.
"It's not about class, which by the way according to Capeside's law of breeding, I'm anything but."
"You've really gotta stop bragging around me Potter."
"I was reffering sleeping arrangments."
"Stop obsessing. We'll probably be in seperate beds as per usual. Unless..."He says grinnning.
"We have to go home." I blurt out numbly.
"What was that?"
"I said...We have to go home"
"No we don't."
"We don't have a choice."
"Alright." He whispers shutting off the engine. "Now, I'm gonna ask you again, and I want the truth this time. Who were you talking to?"
"Pick a name any name." I say exasperated.
"Hmm...Bessie."
"Try--Bessie, your father--Oh, and Jen. Though the there wasn't really much spoken with the latter--"
"What!"He asks angrily.
"What--Why? How did this occur?"
"I was talking to Bessie and all of a sudden he got on the line...then Jen."
He laughs harshly.
"And what did papa John have to say this time around?"
"He said some fairly interesting things."
"Such as?"
"Look, he's going to--or already has--Sent some of the guys to come out and find us."
"So? It's not like they know where we are so..."
"Right."
"I mean, unless you told them, which I know you didn't."
"No, I didn't."
"Good." He says inwardly cringing. "Damn."
"Are we going home?"I ask on edge.
"I don't..."
"Pacey, there gonna come get us sooner or later!"
"Let 'em. I don't care." He says harshly.
"Pacey..."
"I don't care!"He says, his voice cracking. "He can do whatever the hell he wants."
My hand touches his, but he immedientely pulls away. For the first time in a long time, there's nothing but silence. I again find myself fighting tears as I aimlessly reach over to the glove compartment. As if opening pandora' box, my eyes glare with intense curiosity. I never took notice of it before.
"You know they say..." I begin hoping to lighten the situation, and grab his attention. "You can tell alot about a person, by what you find in their glove comparment."
"What like maps?"He asks still brooding.
"No like..." I say mischieviously, pulling out a ziplock-type bag. "White...Stuff."I say holding it up for a closer look, as the street light does little as my replacment eyes in the darkness.
"What?" He asks with a light chuckle.
"What is this?" I ask handing it to him.
"I have no idea."
"Let's just put it back, it's...none of our business."
"And what were you doing in the glove compartment?" He asks leaning closer, rumaging through the junk filled space.
"What are you doing?"
"Oh my..." He says pulling out another ziplock bag.
"I think I know what that is." I say raising a brow.
"Well, well, well, looks like college boy has been spending money on other things besides text books and number two pencils."
"I'd say that was an understament." I say in a little in shock. "I can't believe he has drugs in his glove compartment."
"Where he lacks in creativity..."
"Pacey, this isn't funny."
"You're right." He says seriously. "Looks like he might be a little further into this than I would like to imagine."
"This may be part of the urgency for the car to be returned. So, are you gonna to tell your parents?"
"Fick."
"I'm guessing that's a no."
He pauses.
"Now what is this?"He asks pulling a card from the comparment.
"Credit card?"
"Looks like some sort of Id."
"It is some sort of Id." I add, taking the card.
"Who is... Kevin Mason?" I ask looking from him to the card "Is that your cousin?"
"No." He says softly, shaking his head, and once again looking over the card.
"You have no idea who he is?"
"Well, I don't exactly roam into the dark circles known as my cousin's friends and/or cliques." He says putting the card back into the glove compartment. "Unless I was drunk."
"Oh." I say for lack of better encouragment.
"However..."
"Yeah?"
"I do recognize him a little. Like maybe I've seen him somewhere recently."
"Think..."I say prodding him.
"Man, I know his face, I just can't quite put the face with the place."
I just nod.
"Wait...I know where he's from."
"Spill."I say half smiling.
"Suddenly it all makes sense." He says. "Looks like we're going home."
TBC...well you know the rest:D