SHADE Chapter 12: BLOOPER REEL, a teen titans fanfic

I love movies that have blooper reels during the credits. They always make me laugh, so I thought I'd make some of my own for this story! Were you paying close enough attention to understand them all? I hope so, because I had a great time coming up with them! Please enjoy, and give your final review afterward so I know your thoughts on the story as a whole. Thankies!

Part : Bloopers

Shade works on his mask

A dark, slender figure worked carefully in the night. Hands moving with almost inhuman grace. The dark gave him solace, away from the rest of the world so he would have time to complete his task. A paintbrush in his hand and a buffer in the other… the mask was done. He held it into the small lamp's light, and it glistened with its smooth coat of wax. "Soon." The figure said. "Soon, I'll take you for a test drive. I just need…" The buffer suddenly went off and he squealed, racing around the room as it buffed his face! "Get it off! Get it off!" Stagehands rushed in, wrestling with it.

Mumbo Meets Shade

Shade was standing squarely in front of Mumbo. "Yah!" He rode his own heels trying to stop, and the wind made his magician's cape flare. He skidded right into him, tackling him to the ground with a cry. Shade's mask came off, revealing a stunt man. "Why hello!" Mumbo laughed.

Raven Reads the First Riddle

"Shade… huh?" A tiny slip of paper was wrapped around one of the thorns, then pierced to hold it in place. It was no bigger than a fortune cookie's fortune, and she carefully pulled it free. There was a tiny, typed pair of sentences on it.

I want you… I want you in the worst way… Which is standing up in a hammock.

Raven burst into laughter, holding the wall for support. "What's so funny?" Mumbo said from the ground. Raven showed it to him and he roared with laughter, holding his sides. "Who did that? Beast Boy, was this your idea?"

(Behind the camera) "Dude, don't look at me!"

Raven Meets Shade at the Statue

Raven stood near the statue, looking up at the moon. Then, she looked down at the statue's shadow. When was he com– The shadow was wrong! Raven whirled and found Shade leaning on the statue. His hand was palming one of the statue's breasts. She struggled not to laugh, fighting a grin. Shade moving his fingers like he was squeezing it. "Raven has nice boobs too. Don't you think, Siren?" He looked up at the statue. Raven burst into laughter, doubled over.

Beast Boy Asks Raven About her Café Trip

"Meet anyone interesting there?"

"Uh huhm…"

"Who?"

"Uh huhm…"

"Ah…?" Beast Boy could tell she wasn't paying attention, but that's what was weirding him out. Raven was always sharp and focused, and she wasn't meditating right then… "Raven, I want you... Standing up in a hammock. Thought you should know." They both burst out laughing, and everyone behind camera was rolling in laughter.

Raven Meets the Nun

A nun suddenly appeared, making her jump. "Saints alive…" the sister whispered, looking at the girl's gothic outfit. From her black leotard to her jeweled belt, all the way down to her dark blue cloak. The nun crossed herself as she approached the Teen Titan. "Are you Raven?" she said softly, holding her lantern up to see better.

"Yes." Raven said, trying to keep her voice casual. Nuns made her nervous.

"Stick 'em up, demon!" The nun pulled out a crossbow! Raven ran away screaming. The nun laughed, pulling off her face to reveal it was Beast Boy in a rubber mask! "This… is… great!" He cried between laughs. "It's not even loaded!"

Raven Meets the Nun TAKE 2

"Yes." Raven said, trying to keep her voice casual. Nuns made her nervous. The nun suddenly whipped out a bottle of holy water and pitched it on her! "Nooooo-! I'm melting! I'm melting….!" Raven began sinking into the floor. "Oh what a world what a world…!" she burbled, melting until only her cloak remained.

"Uhm…… oh….kay…" said the Director.

Raven's Heated Dream

"Need help?" Raven sat bolt up on her bed. Someone was in her room. It was too dark to see anything but shapes. She stood, and saw a familiar shape in the darkness.

"Shade…" she whispered. He wasted no time in removing his mask and going to her. It was too dark to see his face. He eased her back down onto the bed. Raven moaned when his lips found hers, and she curled against him when he joined her on the bed. His hands wandered heatedly and Raven's leotard was being unzipped… "Shade… ahn…" she couldn't find words as her cloak was tossed away… the carnal heat was upon them, and she groaned as his kisses began to wander…… "Oh… Shade…" she suddenly sat bolt up, a whip in her hands! Her clothes fell away to reveal a hard, black leather outfit. Raven was a demonatrix!

"Holy shit!" Shade cried, falling back on his butt.

"Who said you could talk?" Raven snapped, cracking her whip.

(Someone behind the camera…) "Cool…"

"Shaddup!" Raven shouted, trying not laugh and cracking her whip again. Everyone but Shade laughed. "April Fools, Shade." She winked at him and he shuddered.

The Statue at the Graveyard

Raven stood with Shade, and she realized they were standing in front of the angel statue. It seemed to be offering them both a hand. Shade silently reached and cupped Raven's cheek. She shut her eyes, leaning her head against it. Suddenly the statue grabbed them both by the neck. Raven cried out in terror as Shade squealed like a little girl. A stone mask fell off to reveal Robin! "Gotcha!" He laughed.

Raven and Shade looked at each other, then simply gave him a shove. Cemented into the statue, he fell backward with a cry!

Raven Asks Shade's Identity

But, finally she had to ask again. "Why won't you tell me who you are? I don't even know your eyes, wearing that dark mask…" Raven whispered.

"We all wear masks." He whispered back to her. "But, Raven… I am… your father! Bwahahahaha!" Raven snorted with laughter.

"Let's try it again…" said the director.

Robin Councils Starfire

"But why did Cyborg and Beast Boy not wish to join us at the show of fireworks?" Asked Starfire.

"Cyborg went to a strip-bar." Robin said as a matter of factly, then started laughing. "And the last time I saw Beast Boy, he had a bag with like a hundred one dollar bills in it. He probably went with him –" Starfire flushed, giggling. She suddenly ducked out of the way as an actor's chair hit Robin on the head, labeled 'Beast Boy.' "Owwch…" Robin stood, only to be hit by another chair. This one was labeled 'Cyborg.' He was down and out.

Raven Finds her Brooch in the Tae Kettle

Raven raced down, into the common room. She threw open her tea cabinet and peered inside. Yanking down her tea kettle, she pulled the top off and three spring-loaded snakes popped out! Raven shrieked, dropping the tea kettle.

(Behind the camera) "Dude! She fell for it!" Raven enchanted the paper snakes with her powers making them real, and sent them after the voice's owner. "Aaaaaah! Run away!"

Raven Finds her Brooch in the Tae Kettle TAKE 2

Raven raced down, into the common room. She threw open her tea cabinet and Shade popped out! "Booga booga booga!" he roared. Raven screamed and fell backward in a panic.

"What the hell are you doing in there!" Raven shouted, desperately clutching her heart. "That's not in the script!"

"Oh brother…" said the director, throwing his hands up in defeat.

Raven Reads the Headline

Hey Raaaaaaveeeeen!" Beat Boy exploded onto the roof, and Raven crashed to the floor. Her hair got her eyes, and she poofed some air out her mouth to move it. She made to glare at him and make him fly off the roof, but he had other plans. "Lookie!" He had a newspaper in his hands, and stuffed it up to her face.

Raven took it and read the headline. Raven Wanted – Hammocks in Jump City Sell Like Hotcakes. Raven burst into laughter, hitting Beast Boy over the head with the newspaper.

Shade's Identity Revealed

Raven gasped, her pupils shrinking into tiny dots. It was Starfire! She'd kissed Starfire! Raven passed out, and Starfire laughed. The real Shade came on set and shook Raven's shoulder. No response. "I think you killed her."

"I did not!" Starfire cried defensively. "Awaken Raven! It is I… ahahaha… the Shade!" She couldn't stop laughing, but Raven was out cold.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin.

"There's a giant booger right there – in your nose, and its kind creepin' me out." He pointed. Raven laughed, calling for a tissue.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy TAKE 2

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin.

"I'm… I'm gay. I just don't like you that way." He'd started laughing before he'd even finished his sentence. Raven snorted, and he was grinning like an idiot.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy TAKE 3

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin.

"There's like a hundred people staring at us, and I'm kinda feeling nervous." He said. Raven grinned, shaking her head.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy TAKE 4

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin.

He dropped her, folding his arms like a five-year old. "I don't wanna!" Raven and Beast Boy both shook with laughter.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy TAKE 5

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin.

The Director started laughing out of nowhere. Raven and Beast Boy turned slowly and stared at him. "What the crap is he laughing at?" Beast Boy wanted to know.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy TAKE 6

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin.

"Your mask is in the way." He smiled. She took it off, and he pulled her into a kiss. Since slow-motion photography was being used, they didn't have to hold it for long. "You had tacos for lunch, huh?"

"Beast Boy!" Raven shrieked, turning bright red.

"Of for the love of –" The director moaned. Off camera, Cyborg and Robin started laughing.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy TAKE 7

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin. "Am I not good enough for you?" she asked, looking very offended. Beast Boy laughed helplessly.

Kiss Me, Beast Boy TAKE 8

"I think… this is the part where you kiss me… so I know that you're the real Shade…" Raven said softly.

"I can't." he said, shaking his head at her.

"Why?" she asked, almost on the verge of tears. There was a long silence, as though he was waiting for her to guess. When she didn't, he fought a grin. "You know what?' she whispered suddenly, looking impatient.

"What?" he asked. Suddenly she grabbed him, overpowering him with an awesome kiss like no other! Every stagehand present laughed as he squirmed helplessly in the lip lock.

"So there!" Raven said, standing and leaving him laying there.

There was a long silence. "…What'd I do?" Beast Boy said, wiping his mouth in disbelief. He was suddenly hit on the head with an actor's chair labeled 'Raven.' He fell, his eyes in swirls.

A New Sunroof

. "But… is that gonna happen every time you two kiss?" Cyborg pointed skyward. There was a twenty-foot wide hole in the roof. Beast Boy and Raven blushed deeply, looking up at it and laughing nervously. "I think you two owe these people a new sunroof." He grinned at them. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a chunk fell from the ceiling and bonked Robin right on the head. Out cold.

"Holy crap!" Cyborg shouted as they all knelt around him. "Medic! Medic!" No one was coming, and he continued to shout in panic. "Medic! White boy down! White boy wonder down!"

END of Blooper Reel

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