So I wrote this very late at night, it's kind of meant to be read slow, just a little poem that lingers as the long days pass. I must say I didn't think I could depress myself so much over writing, you may want to have something ready to cheer yourself up afterwards, angst isn't one of my specialties on here without reason.
Just like Love's Key, there's no initial rhyme to this. It's just what came out of me at this so very late hour.
I see how you look at me, even though you don't know it
That smile on your boyish face, so proud that you saved me
You know that I love you and would do anything for you
I even did once, sacrificed myself in order to save your life
You always look at me so tenderly, gentle and calm
Never do you become too excited at me, you wouldn't want to break your precious girl
Whenever you pull me into your arms, you see a bright smile upon my face
A laugh comes from my stomach, but never my heart
I see you with that sheepish grin, as you lower your head to mine
Your lips are soft and slow
Yet it always makes a million memories crash upon me
Whispers in the night, the scent of flowers in the air
A man crying
I still think about him often, do you know that?
His kiss was so much different than yours
Hungry, like it would never be enough
Loving, like it would be this very way every time
Pleading, like a silent question lingering on my lips
His kiss was so very different
You pull back from me, that sweet look in your eye
Oh how I wish you could see the truth
Then maybe, maybe, I could return to the one who truly hurts
Yet you'll never see it, or you refuse to, you could never accept such an idea
How could I want to go back to something that terrified me so?
He doesn't anymore, that's the reason
I felt it in him, when we kissed, so many things I felt from him
Love and lust were in a duet together, yet they had a perfect balance
I thought I felt anger the strongest, but I was wrong
I believed the only thing he had in him was hatred towards man, but I was wrong
Whenever he became angry and would lash out, it was just as false as his mask
It was fear
There was so very, very much fear within him
Fear of that kiss, of all the betrayal he'd suffered
It was not hatred towards man, it was fear towards man and they hatred they had given him
You smile at me again, you've got to leave on a trip, business you always say
I'm the good wife as I should be as I nod in approval
Always the good wife at home, letting you run things as needed
I don't think he would have gone off without me
No, he would take me with him on any matters, just so I was by his side
I wave to you, smiling in my soft appearance, watching your horse take you in the distance
It can never be mended now, his heart, from what I've done
I'm frightened to admit the truth out loud
If I keep it only a thought, I can at least live
And yet it does nothing
The thought always passes through my mind, whenever we kiss
When I left him, giving him only the feel of my lips on his as a last present
When I killed his soul, I murdered my own