Disclaimer: You probably already get the drift, but I find it fun to repeat the fact that I do not own Final Fantasy VII.

Final Fantasy VII: Chronicles of Cheese

Aeris and Cloud were outside Don Corneo's mansion.

"Damn! Your friend's hot, too!"

They managed to endure the man's brief scrutiny.

They entered the mansion, Cloud seeming especially antsy.

"What's wrong?" Aeris asked.

"This lingerie is itchy!" Cloud whined.

Aeris gave a sigh.

"Hey, ladies!" said the receptionist, "I'll go and let the Don know that you're here. Wait here. Don't go wandering around."

"Now's our chance," Aeris said, an evil twinkle in her eye as if they were breaking into the 1st National to steal some big bucks. "Let's find Tifa."

Cloud nodded in response, continuing to scratch himself.

They headed upstairs, and came to a chamber.

"Ooh, any cheese in here?" Cloud asked to no one in particular.

"Wow, it's creepy," said Aeris, walking into the torture chamber.

They saw a woman, a Tifa woman!

"Hey, Tifa! Nice to meetcha. I'm Aeris! Cloud's told me a lot about you," Aeris greeted warmly.

"Uh, hi, um, Aeris!" Tifa said nervously. "Oh, hey, you're the one with Cloud in the park..." The ellipses signaled Tifa's nervousness.

"Uh-huh, with Cloud," stated Aeris.

"Oh..." Tifa fidgeted.

"Hey, buddy, don't worry! We just met! It's nothing!" Aeris said in a bubbly manner.

"Whaddya mean 'don't worry'? Oh, don't misunderstand. Cloud and I grew up together. Nothing more," Tifa said, giving a shy smile.

Aeris giggled. "Poor Cloud, having to stand there and listen to both of us call him nothing." She turned to Cloud, who was huddled in a corner, looking at him with that oh-so devilish twinkle in her eyes. "Right, Cloud?"

"C- Cloud?" Tifa sputtered, turning to her comrade. "?"

Cloud gave a dumb smile, at a loss of words.

"Why are you dressed like that? And why are you here? Forget that, what happened to you after the fall? Are you hurt?"

Cloud's smile wavered after the barrage of questions. "Hey gimme a chance to explain, girly! I'm dressed like this 'cuz it was the only way to get in here. Plus, it makes me look sexy. Don't you think I look sexy? Tell me yes."

"Are you wearing women's underwear?" Tifa asked.

"Yep," Cloud immodestly replied. "Hey, um, since we're asking questions and all that, what are you doin' here?"

"Oh, hehehehehe," Tifa giggled.

"Ahem!" Aeris said. "I'll just plug my ears."

"I'm glad you're okay!" Tifa said, trying in vain to change the subject.

"Okey dokey, now answer me," Cloud said.

Tifa sighed. "When we got back from Sector 5, there was this weird man. So Barret caught him and squeezed some information out of him."

"Oh," said Cloud, struggling to remember his next line. "That's when you heard about the evil chipmunks trying to take over Uranus!" Cloud giggled at the word Uranus.

"No," Tifa replied bluntly. "That Don guy's name."

"Oh, that incredibly sexy man who gave me fashion tips? Why didn't you say so!" Cloud airheadedly laughed.

"Uh, yeah," Tifa remarked. "Barret told me to leave the lech alone, or 'foo'' as he likes to say, but something's been bothering me..." Tifa paused awkwardly.

"And you decided to go to Taco Bell and by a taco with extra cheese?" Cloud asked in a giddy way. "Cheese is so awesome."

"Okay," Tifa replied. "I wanted to get the story straight from Corneo's mouth. So I made it here, but now I'm in a bind. Corneo is looking for a bride," at this, Cloud got an unusual sparkle in his eyes. "Everyday, he gets three girls, chooses one, and then, well... Anyway, I have to be the girl... or I'm out for tonight."

"Sorry, but I overheard," Aeris asked, being the little eavesdropper she is. "If you know the three girls, then there's no problem, right?"

And then everybody goes 'blah,' go to Don Corneo, and drum roll... Cloud was chosen by the Don!

Cloud: "YES!"

And that concludes today's chapter.

So, what did you think? Review, please! This chapter seemed less random than the others, huh... And shorter... I am currently uninspired... so inspire me with a review!