A/N: The coming four chapters will be written in script format, so read it like you're actually watching the show. I thought it would be more fun to write in this context for the entirety of the show's duration.

The Spookiest Spots on the Planet

Chapter 1

INT. SPOOKY SPOTS - ON SET

The Mysterious Mysteries Host seems to have a job on another paranormal cult hit as well. We pan in on him as he enters the set through a door at the back. The set is decorated with dirty stone walls and torch brackets set into them, as well as plenty of other Middle Ages artifacts. The MMHost slowly walks toward the camera with his hands clasped behind his back.

MMHOST

What makes a place spooky? Is it a dark and unhappy history? Is it an impending feeling of dread? Is it that sandwich floating and talking to you? Tonight, a young, big-headed, paranormal investigator named Dib...

A picture of Dib flashes on the screen.

DIB (O.S.)

MY HEAD'S NOT BIG!

MMHOST (IGNORING DIB)

...His scary sister, Gaz...

Gaz's picture looks none too pleasant as it flashes on the screen.

MMHOST

...A normal boy, Zim...

The picture of Zim has him looking rather confused.

MMHOST

...Zim's little, beefy(1) brother, GIR...

GIR is in his little boy disguise is waving in his picture.

MMHOST

...And a mysterious horned man...

Minimoose, in his picture, has an overcoat hanging from his floating form so it looks as though his body is the head of a purple, horned man in a bowler hat... who also happens to float in midair.

MMHOST

...Will be staying in Badici Castle for one night, for the most terrifying experience of their lives. Let's see how they deal with the supernatural that is supposed to take residence there.

Fade to black. White, spidery letters appear to form a sentence, that a scary voice that sounds like a hoarse old lady on helium starts reading the words.

VOICE

Badici Castle has a history steeped in blood... and liquid soap...

EXT. OUTSIDE THE CASTLE

A historian leans on the outside of the large stone wall and looking casual.

HISTORIAN

This place has been abandoned since the Middle Ages, and the only owner was Count Larribon, who was a major tyrant in the land. He was germophobic and liked to take as many baths as he could in a day, especially after meals. The servants couldn't bring up water fast enough, because the bathroom was on the third floor, so one day, Larribon had them all executed in the dining hall.

He nods knowingly, smiling in a completely carefree manner. We cut to:

EXT. PORCH OF OLD HOUSE

Pan in on a toothless old local.

OLD LOCAL

My Granddaddy said that they took childrens born on March 23rd and brought 'em on up to that there castle, and they didn't never come back out again.

INT. LOCAL BAR

A big, busty woman stands near the bar wearing rather revealing clothes. She lifts herself onto a bar stool.

WOMAN

I think it's safe to say that whatever's up there isn't human. They say this Larribon's wife died giving birth, and he killed the baby too. Real strange stuff.

FADE TO BLACK

VOICE
Count Larribon was strongly opposed to children, especially those born near the ides of march...

EXT. OUTSIDE THE CASTLE

HISTORIAN

There have been hundreds of bones found around the property of hundreds of children. Larribon liked to write about how much he hated them

EXT. PLAY PARK

A little boy holds a football to his chest protectively, and looks into the camera fearfully.

LITTLE BOY

Uhm... My friends were all throwing rocks at the windows, and a boy just like me walked past and then disappeared! It was scary. Can I go now?

FADE TO BLACK

VOICE

It's been speculated that all the disappearances in the town are attributable to the ghosts' thirst for blood...

EXT. GROCERY STORE

A harrassed looking mother stands with a baby on her hip and a shopping cart filled to the brim with food. A sausage link dangles over the side of the cart.

MOTHER

I won't let any of my kids play out near that place. A lot of kids have been going missing and there's no way... (glances off screen, and does a double take on what she sees)... John! Let go of your brother's hair!

EXT. OUTSIDE CASTLE

HISTORIAN

People like to blame the disappearances on the ghosts, but that's a bunch of...

Suddenly, the man gets sucked into the wall, screaming the entire way.

FADE TO BLACK

VOICE

Yeah, I'll have a number four with extra cheese... OH! Right! Um, (clears throat) 6:30 p.m. Sunset. The team approaches Badici...

EXT. OUTSIDE CASTLE

A van pulls up to an ornate gate, and out step Gaz, Dib and Zim. GIR rockets out, and Minimoose floats. They are all wearing vests that focus a camera on each of their faces. Dib seems to be the only one wh's even remotely awed by the sight of the castle.

GAZ

It's stupid.

DIB (OFFENDED)

Gaz! This is one of the most haunted places in the world! It's COOL!

ZIM (SCOFFING)

You humans and your bad taste in architecture. Look at that! It's more hideous than you! (Points at Dib)

DIB (NOT HAVING FUN SO FAR)

HEY!

MINIMOOSE (COMFORTING DIB)

squeak

DIB (NODDING)

Yeah, I guess...

ZIM (SHOCKED THAT HIS SERVANT WOULD TRY TO MAKE DIB FEEL BETTER)

MINIMOOSE! Have you no SHAME?

MINIMOOSE

squeak

ZIM

Well... Don't do it again...

GIR (CHIPPER)

WE GONNA DIE!

They all headed up the long driveway to the castle, and by the time they get to the bonfire at the end, they're exhausted, except for GIR.

DIB (PANTING)

Here.. we are...

GAZ

If... I ever have to hike... for a coupon again... I'm going to... doom you, Dib...

GIR

Let's find the hidden treasure! ARR!

ZIM

When I... get back to my base... I'm going to... (He thinks for a second) Oh, I donno.

The MMHost walks toward them around the bonfire. He looks at Dib and rolls his eyes, not believing his luck at having to work with him again.

MMHOST

Is everyone here?

ZIM

Yes, yes, tell us our mission already!

GIR

Moo, moo, MOOOOOOOOOOOO!

MMHOST

Uh-huh... Well, it's simple. There are infrared cameras everywhere in the castle, and you'll be investigating wherever you can. Here's a map of the castle. You'll meet up in the entrance hall every three hours, and I'll give you more instructions from there. So, let's go inside.

Dib nods, excited down to his very molecules, Gaz shrugs, Zim grunts, Minimoose squeaks, and GIR vomits. They make their way to a table in the middle of the entrance hall, looking around them uninterested, except for Dib, who's absolutely entralled. They take a seat, and wait for the MMHost to begin speaking. He pauses for dramatic effect, but the pause is much too long for Zim.

ZIM

Expel your words through spittle, human! What do we have to do?

MMHOST (LOOKING AT ZIM STRANGELY)

You must all start with nothing but your flashlights. Go around the castle and see if you can't feel anything unusual from your natural sixth sense, then come back in three hours. Just hope that the haunting isn't too bad tonight...

A/N: (1): I played off of the idea that GIR's disguises are filled with ground beef. Plus, I liked the sound of "little, beefy brother".

Well, it's been fun, but I've got to break here, or I'll never get any sleep. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Blessed Be!