"There were many days in the beginning when I thought I would get out of here, that this was some sort of dream." Andy started. "Now, I know it's not."

Red nodded somberly. "Yep. I reckon most of the boys here felt that way at one time or another. I've never known a more desperate feeling – when it sinks in that you aren't going home. You are home."

"Yes." Andy looked directly into Red's eyes. "It's a killer… I am not."

Andy proceeded to tell Red about what he could recollect about the night his wife was murdered. Red watched his friend's expression as he told the story, it was one of the first times he had really seen Andy show any emotion. There was a hurt in his eyes that still appeared fresh though it had been years since the murder, since Andy came to Shawshank. There was such conviction in the man's face as he spoke. Red believed him completely.

"I don't know how this happened, Red. But I didn't do it. I couldn't do it."

"You'd be surprised what a man can do." Red said reflecting on his own experience. "I know you didn't do it Andy."

"I've played it over and over in my mind and I still don't understand…I…"

Red didn't know what to say and remained silent. Andy looked at him as if hoping he could wave a wand like in the books he'd read as a kid and make it all magically disappear. But this wasn't going away. Every morning Andy woke up to the dull gray concrete that surrounded him and the cold metal bars that kept him locked inside. This was real. This was his life. Andy knew that Red could not help him, no one could help him. The important thing, he told himself, was not to lose hope.

Andy let out a light sigh. "I think I'll save this for another day." He said motioning to this book. He rose from his chair and exited the library.

Red watched him go. He felt bad for having asked.

If something like that had happened to me, Red thought, I'd be hanging right now. How does he keep going everyday knowing he shouldn't be in here? Knowing that someone else should? It is almost too much for a man to bear, but somehow he does it.

Andy is a hard man to know. He internalizes things. But even just knowing that about the man, I respect him all the more.