I'm still a Woody/Jordan fan, I want to establish that right now. However…given recent events, I want Jordan to do better than thecrap Woody's throwing at her. Hence, my story, set a few months in the future and only slightly sticking with the plotlines that we have been made cognizant of. Also, I don't really watch Las Vegas, so I'm probably changing their plotlines to suit my fancy!

Disclaimer: I disclaim… there, are you happy, you copyright crazies?

I Want To Care

Sunny and warm in December.

It made her wonder why she had ever moved to a place like Boston. Why she had fled the comfort of the Los Angeles climate. Why she had never considered moving to a city that offered that same temperate weather that caused one to live in a perpetual time warp, not knowing the real difference between summer and winter. Seasons didn't change; and when seasons don't change, it becomes possible to pretend that the world isn't really turning, that time isn't passing. Ignoring the warps in her life would be as natural as the stubbornly perfect weather. Why hadn't she picked a city like this? Why not this city? Why not Las Vegas?

Jordan squinted up at the Montecito Hotel, her sunglasses doing very little to block the sun that was bouncing off the glass of the building. She clutched a rolling suitcase in one hand, her purse in the other. She took a deep breath and let it out in a sigh.

"An ME always reserves the right to change her mind."

At the time, her words had been said as a consolation of sorts. He probably had not really believed her. She had only half believed herself. It was all his idea: his invitation. He knew what he was getting into, she was sure of that. She could have said no. In the back of her mind, she knew the only reason she had accepted was to try to find some sort of connection that was not going to mean anything in the end. And he was too good for that. She couldn't bring herself to use him for her own pathetic need for, what was it she had said? "Cheap, meaningless sex?" Yes, that was it.

So she had high tailed it out of there and found what she was looking for elsewhere. And, on some levels, it helped. On some levels. On many others, she was still working away from the worst heartbreak she had ever felt from a man she loved. And the worst part was that he knew. He knew that she really did love him; he just chose to let those emotions bleed out of her while he made no secret of the fast and furious romances he sought out, the most recent being with his psychiatrist. The polar opposite of Jordan.

After a while, she no longer cared. She still loved him, but she could not bring herself to care for him. It made as little sense to her as it did to the friends that she confided in. She wanted to care, but she couldn't. He treated her like something less than human. His words about his recovery still burned her ears. No one had ever said anything that nasty to her before. "I'm cleansing myself, you know, getting all the toxins out of my system." The look he gave her as he emphasized the word "toxins" hardly gave her any reason to wonder if he meant her. How could she care for anyone who continued to treat her that way?

And then one night, as she lay in bed next to a man she had hooked up with for the third time, she realized that she wanted to care…for somebody, anybody. The meaningless sex had been enough for a while. But it left her feeling hollow.

Cue the red eye flight to Las Vegas. There was something about Danny McCoy that intrigued her, and kept her wondering 'what would have happened if…?' How had he gotten her to do something so spontaneous as to fly out to Vegas two and a half months ago? No one had ever been able to tug her strings like that before. It left her off balance. It was a nice feeling.

As she wandered into the parking garage of the hotel, Jordan wondered what Garret would do when he listened to his voicemail and received her call telling him that she was taking a few vacation days. He'd probably think she had mixed her pills with alcohol. Oh, life was complicated. She had never been very good at explaining her way of thinking to anyone else, why start now?

It didn't take long for Jordan to find Danny's BMW parked in his staff space. She steadied her suitcase on the ground, and then hopped onto the trunk of the car to sit and wait. She let her mind go blank, or as blank as possible, until she heard the elevator door open twenty feet away and the person she had been waiting for emerged. She felt her stomach turn a little, nervous about how he would react to her being here. Halfway to the car, he finally caught sight of the fact that she was sitting on the BMW, her long legs crossed casually. He stopped, looking shocked but happy.

"Jordan Cavanaugh, what on earth are you doing here?" Danny asked with an incredulous smile. She smiled back at him, shrugging coyly.

"I changed my mind."

Short, I know, but I'm still feeling this idea out. Feedback? Comments? Criticisms (so long as they are constructive and not harsh about who I am pairing)?