Gil and Griss Disorder
Disclaimer: I own nothing but I love them as a family.
A/N: Again, I have no intention to ruin the relationship between Griss and Sara; I want them to be together, married and live happily all their lives. But my brain just can't help thinking about Griss's feeling for Sara for a long time...This time, from Griss POV. And inspiration from: Gil, emotional; Griss, rational; and when they are talking about this feeling, well as the man haven't said anything out but we know he could feel something, let's just call it feeling.
Gil: Sara catches my attention.
Griss: What kind of attention?
Gil: Something you can't help to notice.
Griss: Notice what?
Gil: Notice how she talks, how she acts, how she expresses...even if when she stand there, working alone, you just can't help wondering what's she thinking about...
Griss: Only when she DOES to others? Not including HOW to you?
Gil: Nope. Even when she is talking to me, I still DO my notice.
Griss: You mean observing her even if when she is talking to you?
Gil: Yeah. Sometimes I'm confused by myself...I mean when I'm observing her talking to me, it seems one part of me is parted out to do this observation work and another part of me is staying there to do that talking-with-her work.
Griss: You said ONE and Another...What about the rest part of you?
Gil: ...I didn't notice there was THE REST PART OF ME...
Griss: Until I remind you now?
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: Then recall your memorable feeling; could you feel the rest part of you now, during your observation?
Gil: Nope...All can I feel is that the rest is blank...
Griss: To which point you mentioned the word BLANK?
Gil: ...The feeling for Sara...
Griss: That means two part of you HAVE feeling for her?
Gil: Kinda...
Griss: What feeling?
Gil: The feeling of knowing I am doing an observing work.
Griss: Do you find something unusual during you observing work?
Gil: I don't know how to judge what I got for observation...Everything seems to be usual...usual in daily life...But...every usual thing of her seems to be unusual to me...
Griss: You mean she is special to you?
Gil: Kinda...
Griss: Only after she showed you her feeling for you?
Gil: Not exactly...She catches some of my attention when I first met her...but...catches more after she showed her feeling for me...
Griss: You mean you care her more after...
Gil: Yeah...
Griss: What's more, comparing with before she showed her feeling?
Gil: I don't know...It seems you want to see her or talk with her more often...
Griss: To confirm whether she is holding the same feeling for you all the time?
Gil: Not totally...That might be part of reason...but...it seems I want to know more about her...herself...
Griss: So you have interests on her?
Gil: Interests? You call it interests?...
Griss: Or let's say she is attractive to you?
Gil: I told you she catches my attention from the beginning.
Griss: And she catches more after she showed her feeling for you?
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: And her showing of her feeling for you...is a bridge to bring you both closer?
Gil: If you mean closer in feeling; that's...right!
Griss: Not in real relationship?
Gil: Yeah. We are still friends...Maybe...closer friends...
Griss: And that's what you want?
Gil: I wish we could be friends, intimate friends.
Griss: Just friends, not relatives, not families?
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: Even if FRIEDNS is a word which almost referring to social relationship?
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: Again—and that's what you want?
Gil: ...
Griss: ...
Gil: I can't find any relationship better than this...between us.
Griss: Before you know which is the best?
Gil: ...
Griss: Before you are sure things would be better if you did something which might cause the ruin of your friends-relationship?
Gil: I have no any intention to ruin this friends-relationship.
Griss: But you have thought of WHAT IF...
Gil: ...I don't understand what you mean by what if.
Griss: Then why it bothers you when you realized she catches your attention?
Gil: ...
Griss: ...
Gil: It's not bother. I...sometimes couldn't stop doing my observation...kind of occupational habit...
Griss: And this habit takes more than six years?
Gil: That's common, to habit.
Griss: And what's your conclusion, after your observing work?
Gil: No conclusion...It's just like you are looking at a life living in the world.
Griss: And curious about the living process of one life?
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: What makes the living process of this life curious to you?
Gil: ...
Griss: And the more observation you do, the more curious you are, and the longer time you spend on...?
Gil: ...
Griss: Can we use the word curiosity to define your feeling when you first met her?
Gil: ...You could. And it's common for human beings to be curious about others.
Griss: But it's not common that this curiosity has lasted to more than six years and is still strongly stimulating your observing work.
Gil: ...
Griss: Until you choose one way out, or she chooses one way out, but you both haven't been out.
Gil: We are not talking about me and her, right?
Griss: We are talking about your situation, your presupposing condition, your observing environment, your expectation possibility.
Gil: I haven't thought so much.
Griss: You have...in the rest part of you; and that's what those two parts of you refused to realize in consciousness.
Gil: ...What do you think the rest of me think of?
Griss: What you haven't answered me?
Gil: ...
Griss: Is what-you-have that what-you-want?
Gil: ...
Griss: And what's the obstacle between what-you-have and what-you-want?
Gil: ...Risk.
Griss: Risk of...
Gil: Everything I've worked for so far...
Griss: Including your friends-relationsh...with her?
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: She has showed her feeling for you.
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: And has moved to your lab and been living around you for six years.
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: Even if you have refused her invitation.
Gil: Yeah.
Griss: Even if the entire lab could read her heart but you neglect it.
Gil: ...Yeah.
Griss: Not enou...
Gil: ...?...
Griss: Love.
Gil: ...?...
Griss: Comparing to her, your love is not enough.
Gil: ...
Griss: That's might be what you fear.
Gil: ...?...
Griss: The reason you might lose her one day.
Gil: ...
Griss: Talk to her.
Gil: ...?...
Griss: ...when it is enough.
(Griss closed the door behind him, and left Gil alone sitting at his desk with papers occupied as usu...)
It's a little later when I put out this fic after Sara and Sidle Disorder; I don't know whether you like this Gil Griss in my fic, just write out what I've got. So PLS let me know your opinion.
In Symposium , Platosaid the best perfect relationship between soul mate is the relationship based on the art of teaching and learning. Maybe we could say Griss and Sara have said much for it.
And thank you so much for everyone who has R&R so far!