He lay on the bed, the minutes passing by like days. The room was a grey-blue colour, momentarily lit up by a passing car every so often. Caitlin was beside him, but he didn't reach out to touch her, he knew he couldn't. The silence had been almost comforting, he didn't want to speak his mind, he just wanted to gaze at the girl he'd been determined to spend the rest of his life with, even if she really wasn't there. Finally, he faced the question that had been praying on his mind since waking up to realise she was no longer with him.

"How am I going to get through this?" Caitlin seemed to be expecting this, reciting a practiced answer.

"I suppose you just have to take it slowly…no one is expecting you to get back to normal right away." He looked over at her, smiling as she twisted a strand of hair around her finger absentmindedly.

"You are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen Caitlin…I don't think I could ever find anyone that makes me feel like you do," he confessed, lowering his eyes as she glanced at him.

"I should hope not Virgil," she replied with a smile. "But I don't doubt you'll meet someone that you will fall for and you can have the whole family and grandchildren bit then." Virgil shrugged, not wanting to imagine life beyond this.

"Your funeral is tomorrow Caitlin…does that mean this is…you know, will I be able to talk to you again? It's just…that's like the final goodbye isn't it?"

"Virgil, you will have to move on," she said solemnly. "What do you think death is?" Virgil swallowed and picked at the flaked skin around his fingernails. The question had haunted him since he'd lost his mother and it was something he'd pondered over alone.

"When my Mom died, I just thought that was the end…with you…I don't know Caitlin, it's like there must be something more…that's why I can speak to you now…I know this isn't real as such, but..." He trailed off looking at her as a tear slowly traced its way down her cheek. His own eyes filled and he did nothing to stop the tears.

"You always told me you believed in some kind of heaven…and the way you spoke about it, I liked it too. I mean…I want to be with you when it's my time…"

"If that's what you want, then that is what heaven can be for you Virgil." Her voice was pure and Virgil let the first heartbreaking sob burst from deep within him.

"I don't want to let you go though…"

"You don't have to just yet…" Caitlin's voice was a whisper and Virgil felt her breath against his cheek as she moved closer to him.

"I love you Caitlin…I love you so much…"

Morning arrived with the sounds of a city coming to life, car horns blaring, fleeting choruses of music moving past his window. Virgil couldn't bring himself to open his eyes, he didn't want to see that empty space beside him.

"You can't do this forever Virgil…" It was what she would say, but he'd just spoken it. Opening his eyes slowly, he looked around his room, cold and alone. He glanced towards the place he'd seen her lie the night before and noticed small creases in the sheets. His hand hovered above them before he grabbed the pillow above his head and pressed his face into it, muffling his painful sobs.

He was shaking as he knotted the tie and straightened it in front of the mirror. Another wave of nausea flooded him and he closed his eyes, praying for it to pass quickly. When he opened his eyes, his reflection shocked him. Tired eyes, pale skinned, deep set creases on his forehead showed a man who'd had little rest in recent weeks.

"Oh Caitlin…why you?" he wondered out loud as he heard a sharp knock on his front door. Slowly he made his way to it, opening it and retreating with shock at the face that greeted him on the other side.

"Virgil…" the voice said and Virgil felt his knees collapsing beneath him. His father rushed to his side, taking him in his arms as he broke down, sobbing unashamedly into his shoulder.

"I can't do it Dad…I can't let her go…"

"You don't have to do it alone Virgil…I'm here…Scott's here…" Virgil looked up as his older brother entered the apartment, his sharp eyes softened by tears for his brother's pain. He got down beside his brother and held him, stroking his hair as he wept, shaking uncontrollably.

"Oh Virgil…I'm so sorry, but me and Dad are here now…we'll always be here…" Scott told him reassuringly. Virgil lifted his head and wiped his cheeks with the back of his hand.

"Thank you for this," he smiled weakly.