Alan could hear his newborn baby daughter, Lucy, crying, but exhaustion had the better of him and he closed his eyes wearily. From her room he heard someone whispering to her and slowly her sobs began to subside, replaced by soft giggles. Alan got to his feet and wandered through to the room, to see Virgil holding his niece carefully, rocking her up and down. His face was pensive in the soft light until he noticed Alan.

"Hey," Alan said brightly. Virgil managed a small smile, though it seemed to take some effort.

"Hey, I thought you needed the sleep. She only wanted a bit of attention really," Virgil said, holding his arms out for Alan to take her. Alan shook his head quickly, gesturing for Virgil to continue to hold her.

"It's okay, I think she likes you more right now," Alan smiled, rubbing his blonde spikes as Virgil smiled down on Lucy. She gurgled contentedly, obviously quite a fan of her newly-introduced uncle. Virgil's smile slowly faded to form a small frown, his eyes misting over.

"I can't believe I missed this," he said after a while. "I missed so much…" Alan was waiting for this and already had a somewhat prepared response.

"But you went through so much as well…you were going to be married, you're now a qualified paramedic…" Virgil looked up at him with such sad eyes and Alan trailed off slowly.

"It doesn't mean anything though Al," Virgil sighed.

"Are you going to go out on more rescues?" Alan asked, quickly changing the subject and Virgil shrugged.

"Probably, it depends on what Dad and Scott say I suppose. They're the men at the top. I wouldn't mind though…I'm a bit out of practice, but I'd like to get back in…"

"Of course they will let you Virg…you were awesome the last time. I couldn't believe how you managed to get that little girl so calm when you brought her round…"

"I had loads of training Al…" Virgil protested modestly, but Alan shook his head determinedly.

"No way. It was something else." Lucy let out a soft whimper and Virgil kissed her tiny head gently, settling her instantly. Alan looked at his older brother for a moment, before approaching his next question.

"Do you think you and Caitlin would have ever had children?" Alan asked apprehensively.

"Without a doubt," Virgil replied instantly with a smile. "Three or four mini Caitlin's or Virgil's running around would have been fun I imagine." Alan laughed and sat down next to his older brother.

"You'd make a good dad I think."

"You're just saying that Al, but thanks all the same," Virgil smiled.

"So we're going to be doing a bit of babysitting tomorrow night," Caitlin announced, putting the finishing touches to the Christmas tree. Virgil sat on the couch, untangling fairy lights, his brow furrowed in concentration.

"Uh huh," he muttered, pulling away a strand of brightly coloured bulbs. "Hey, hey…look at this sweetie. Isn't your boyfriend just brilliant?" The two sets of lights hung from Virgil's outstretched arms and Caitlin rolled her eyes.

"Did you even listen to what I said?" she asked, expressing mock annoyance. Virgil looked at her, an innocent expression crossing his face.

"I can't multi-task," he said in a small, child-like voice. Caitlin took the lights from him, placing them down across the chair and sitting next to him.

"I agreed to babysit for Travis and Rachel," she repeated. Virgil laughed, before glancing at her, worryingly.

"Um…you know I am rubbish with kids, right?"

"How much experience have you had Virgil?"

"Two baby brothers!" he replied. "Honestly…I'm terrible Caitlin." Caitlin looked upset before she pulled herself into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"You're older now," she said quietly, tucking her head under Virgil's chin. Virgil didn't say anything as he felt Caitlin kissing his neck softly.

"I…um…" he said, stopping as she lifted her head and kissed him, keeping her pleading eyes fixed on his.

"Sweetheart," he tried to protest, but Caitlin shifted in his lap and everything he was going to say evaporated from his mind.

"Oh hell…" he murmured as he pulled her against him, their Christmas decorating forgotten for the time being.

He was eased back to the present by the feeling of Alan's hair brushing against his bare shoulder and the feeling of Lucy shuffling in his arms. He glanced at his youngest brother and placed a kiss on the top of his head.

"You're doing great with this Alan," he assured him. "It's a scary step, but you and Tin Tin have really just got on with it."

"I wish you'd been here when all this happened," Alan confessed. "I couldn't tell anyone…Dad would have gone mental, Scott would have lectured me about my responsibilities, John wasn't here to ask and Gordon…he'd have blabbed to the whole world before I'd even explained…" He trailed off with a laugh and Virgil glanced at him guiltily.

"I'm sorry."

"Oh I wasn't digging for an apology…I just wanted you to know you were missed while you were gone." Alan looked down at his daughter and rested his pinkie on her tiny pink hands, watching as slowly she moved her fingers around it.

"Thanks for this Al," Virgil said. "No one else dares even mention Caitlin, but I'm glad you asked me about it…it helps to talk, you know."

"Anytime…seriously. I know it's always you and Scott that do that whole sharing your feelings thing, but things have changed. Scott still only confides in you, but maybe you've opened up a bit more since you came back…" Virgil nodded and Alan got to his feet, easing his finger from Lucy's hand. He yawned and kissed her, his eyes softening as he gazed on his beautiful baby.

"Can you put her back to bed when she doses off?"

"Sure," Virgil said, watching Alan leave the room. The baby in his arms shifted and he returned his attention to her.

"He's so tiny," Virgil said, his voice barely a whisper as Caitlin took the baby in her arms gently.

"He's beautiful…" she breathed, smiling at the proud parents.

"We'll only be gone two hours or so…we just wanted some time together and…well, I guess you guys might want to see what lies in store for you," Rachel said, winking in Caitlin's direction. Virgil looked towards Caitlin and saw her smile shyly. He walked over to her, placing his hand on her shoulder.

"Hey champ," he whispered to the baby, tickling his cheek with his pinkie. Caitlin looked up at him and he kissed her softly.

"Guess this is what lies in store for us," he murmured. Caitlin's eyes lit up and they both returned to looking at the baby boy sleeping in her arms. Virgil slipped his arms around her waist and pressing his lips against her shoulder, felt totally contentment and happiness for what seemed like the first time in years.

Lucy pointed up towards Virgil as he softly hummed a piece of music to her, a lump forming in his throat as he remembered his first babysitting.

"Your Daddy is very lucky," Virgil whispered as he watched her eyes slowly closing as his filled up. He took a deep breath as he placed the sleeping child back in her cot and tucked the sheets around her, stroking her head softly, the light fuzz on her head sticking up. Virgil looked up to see John standing in the doorway, a smile on his sleepy face.

"Getting to know your niece?" he asked in a whisper.

"She's amazing," Virgil replied. "Absolutely perfect…you think Alan will let me teach her piano?"

"You're smitten like the rest of us!" John exclaimed in a loud whisper and Virgil pushed him out of the doorway, closing the door over gently.

"You'll wake the poor wee thing."

"Poor wee thing? Where did you pick up that phrase?" John frowned as soon as he had said it as it dawned on Virgil what he'd said.

"She used to say that all the time," Virgil said finally. John bit his bottom lip and his brother cleared his throat distractedly.

"Everyone to her was a 'poor wee thing'," he continued, a rare smile flickering across his face. John nodded before rubbing his hand across his chin thoughtfully.

"Look, I'm sorry Virgil…this is crazy for everyone and I didn't mean to make a terrible time even worse for you…I just…I don't know, I wanted you to hurt as much as we all did…now I can see you're hurting so much worse and I'm so sorry for that Virgil, really I am," John said. "From what Gordo and Scott told me, Caitlin was lovely…I'm sorry you've had to go through this…"

"I'm sorry as well. I didn't even think about what you were telling me…I was so caught up in what had just happened. I want you to know that I never, ever wanted to do what I did, but it happened and it changed my life completely…shattered it I guess and I need you right now John…" Virgil said, his voice faltering as he met his eyes. John placed his hands on his brother's shoulders and smiled warmly.

"I'm here," he said. Both looked at each other before letting out a burst of laughter, falling into each other and they tried desperately to quieten their giggles.

"Pure cheese…" Virgil laughed, pushing John playfully. "You couldn't have scripted that at all!"

"I can't believe that came out all on its own," John agreed, looking at his brother's face, a smile on it, his eyes almost happy.

"Good to see you can smile Virgil," he said after a moment.

"Yeah…it feels good to smile for a change."

In his bed, Jeff heard the muffled laughing and the stumbling footsteps towards the kitchen and smiled contentedly. They had made peace. Now it was his turn.

Virgil stared into the mug in front of him, his mind refusing to cease bringing images of Caitlin into his dreams and his every thought. A year to the night, a year since he'd prepared himself to pop the question that would have changed his life forever. Instead, the question had never been asked and he was back to where he had been. His life seemed to have become stagnant, as if the three years he'd spent in New York were just a dream he'd once had.

"Oh another insomniac?" a voice whispered.

"Hey Dad," he murmured, taking a sip of the lukewarm tea.

"Are you drinking coffee? No wonder you can't sleep," Jeff mock scolded him as he took a seat beside Virgil.

"No. It's tea. Caitlin used to say it helped her sleep. I don't think it's helping me though." Virgil glanced at his father and shrugged. Jeff tried to smile warmly at Virgil, but it faltered. When he looked at Virgil, he no longer saw the caring, soft smile, warm eyes that he'd inherited from his mother. He saw a face of a man who'd been, to quote a common phrase, to hell and back. Virgil looked older than his twenty-eight years; he'd lost the warmth in his eyes, Jeff hardly saw him smile anymore and although he was still as caring as ever, it was more distant than before. His love of his family hadn't been his priority for three years and Jeff felt it had taken its toll.

"Dad…I just want to say that I'm really glad you've let me back here, you've allowed me to try and get back to some kind of normality. Thanks for that."

"What else could I do Virgil? Your brothers would have disowned me had I left you after Caitlin's death…"

"But what about you, Dad? Don't tell me you did this just for them…?" Jeff rubbed his forehead for a moment, as if thinking of what to say.

"Your leaving almost tore us apart Virgil," he said solemnly. "Scott fell to pieces without you to confide in. John knew you were hiding in New York and I had to do everything to stop him going there to drag you back. Gordon couldn't handle the pressures of Thunderbird 2 and 4…"

"I'm sorry…I didn't mean for it to have that effect…"

"You should have come home before now."

"How could I? I know I was needed here…but I was needed there as well. Caitlin and I were completely in love, we needed each other. I couldn't leave her…I tried, but I just couldn't. You must know how that feels Dad…you of all people…" Jeff looked at him for a long time before he nodded slowly.

"I know how you must hurt at night…you lean over to kiss her, but she's not there…just cold air filling empty space," Jeff sighed. Virgil looked at his father in a new light.

"The first few weeks after it happened, I kept looking for her, wanting to ask her something. I didn't want to believe that she was gone…I feel like I cried for a month solid…I couldn't stop…I couldn't sleep, didn't eat, just cried I think…" Virgil stopped as his father reached over to place his hand over his.

"Virgil…I wanted you home more than anything after Caitlin died because I knew how you would feel and I wanted the family…and me, to be there for you no matter what…I was afraid you wouldn't be able to cope alone…"

"After Mom died…I don't know what I would have done if it hadn't been for Scott…I suppose if I'd stayed in New York by myself…well, I don't want to think about what might have been…" Jeff's face paled at Virgil's confession and his hand came around his, grabbing hold of it. Virgil's eyes filled with trembling tears and he turned his head to hide them, but Jeff shook his head.

"Don't be ashamed of crying."

"What about the whole 'Tracy's don't cry'," Virgil sniffed with a half-smile.

"It's bullshit. It was said by a man who didn't have a clue how to deal with his emotions after a traumatic experience…he should have taken advice from his son." Virgil moved towards his father, hesitating as he placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Dad…thank you for this. Thank you for everything you have done for me." Before, Jeff would have brushed his son's sentiments aside, but he looked deep into Virgil's eyes and smiled.

"I have made some terrible mistakes, but now…now, I will never make them again."