Jack Gallagher was pacing. He was nervous and he didn't even try to hide it from anyone. His counterpart had been gone for a couple of hours now after saying he would get him out of the cell, but Jack was worried that O'Neill was going to fail him on this. He was a prisoner and a likely candidate for the loony bin; he just knew O'Neill wouldn't be able to get him out of this hellhole.
He continued to pace even as he wondered if he was driving the people who were monitoring the camera crazy. He secretly hoped so. At least he wouldn't be the only crazy man on the base. He grimaced at the thought of being insane. He was terrified that he had finally given up, that Handar and his men had actually won. Don't go there, he told himself, as he worried about losing it again.
Where was O'Neill? Surely it wouldn't take this long to convince General Landry that Jack was better off away from this cell. Jack continued to pace, finding some comfort in the movements. He had spent the last eight months working in the mines or the fields from daylight to dusk, not getting much chance to do anything other than toil at the tasks he was expected to complete. He was always too tired to do anything once the sun went down, although he did make time to enjoy Taria's charms when they had gone to bed. She was an attentive lover and he was glad for those times even as he cursed her for being the bitch she turned out to be.
He stopped pacing when he thought he heard the tinkling of her laughter. He'd always enjoyed hearing her laughter when he had first arrived in that place. No one really had anything to laugh about, considering the circumstances, but Taria was the type to enjoy life no matter what was thrown at her. She was thrilled when he was given to her as her mate, telling him that he was the only one who still had the desire to make jokes. He wondered now if she had ever loved him.
He looked around, half afraid he'd see her standing in the room. She was so pretty, he remembered. Her sky blue eyes had reminded him of Carter, even though she was much younger than the Colonel. Jack remembered the first time he saw her. She was talking animatedly with another woman and he was surprised to hear her laughter, sounding loud amidst the silence that enveloped that place. He was drawn to the laughter, but at the time he was more interested in finding a way out of there.
He smiled at her when she saw him watching her, then walked toward the outskirts of the camp he was being held prisoner in. He stayed well away from the fence, knowing from experience that it was electrified. There was a burn on his hand as a testimony to that fact. He walked along the fence looking for anything that would aid him in his escape. He knew that he would soon be rescued, but it didn't hurt to try to slip away in the middle of the night if he was given the opportunity.
He continued his search, then looked toward the camp when he heard the laughter that would eventually haunt his dreams. He smiled at her again thinking that he would definitely like to get to know her, just before he wondered if she could help him get out of there. Oh man, if he only knew then what he knew now.
He resumed his pacing as he reminisced about the early days of his imprisonment. Handar had summoned Jack to his quarters not long after his arrival to tell him in great detail all that was expected of him. He was expected to work on whatever they told him with no questions asked. They expected him to work and act like a slave, to never resist or balk when told to do something, and most importantly to never attempt to escape. There was nowhere for him to go, he was told, and the desert surrounding Handar's oasis was an unforgiving foe that would surely kill him if he did manage to get away.
Jack listened to all this even though he had no intentions of giving into any of their demands. Unfortunately, he had to learn the hard way that his intentions weren't always in his best interest. They had beaten him, subjected him to starvation and threatened to kill his mate if he so much as even thought of leaving their less than hospitable company. It was the thought of Taria's demise that kept him there, more so than the other threats. He had survived all of the above, but he couldn't be the reason for his lover's torture and death. He would never have been able to live with himself if he did.
Jack put a stop to his reminiscing when he realized that he was heading into territory better left untouched. He definitely didn't want to remember what happened to him when he and Taria did manage to make a run for it. He stopped pacing again and curled his hands around the bars of the cell, putting his head up against the cool metal, desperately trying to chase away the memories that were bubbling just beneath the surface. Oh God, he never wanted to ever go through that again.
He stayed that way for some time, calming himself with forced thoughts of fishing at his cabin in Minnesota. He hadn't thought of that place in awhile, he realized. He had given up on the thoughts of being rescued and had lived his days getting up when told to then retiring when told to, too tired to even think of anything but fulfilling his obligation of trying to get Taria pregnant to keep Handar and the guards off his back. They needed children to replace the older slaves and Jack was harassed daily because of his negligence in producing a future slave. It wasn't his fault, he reasoned. He was making love to her on a nightly basis and he knew he was more than capable of producing a child; at least he was before he was cloned. It didn't help when he had doubts about passing on his genes due to the fact that he was indeed a clone. Because of this, he didn't know who was more elated when Taria had finally become pregnant, he or Taria.
Jack grimaced when he thought about the punishment they'd both received after Taria had a miscarriage. It wasn't as if they wanted to lose the child, he thought with some heat. Taria had been so proud that she was finally going to be a mother and was thoroughly devastated when the bleeding wouldn't stop and even Jack couldn't console her, not that he really wanted to. He had lost any love he had for her when she had betrayed him to Handar and his guards.
He turned his thoughts back to Minnesota and happier times, wondering if he would survive this. It suddenly dawned on him that he had been remembering his imprisonment and he was still in the present. This thought caused him to smile as he let go of the bars and stepped back. He was getting better, he just knew it. Now all he had to do was convince O'Neill and Landry.
He went over to the bed to sit on it, wishing someone would come sit with him. Carter or Teal'c would keep the memories away with their talk of life, as they knew it. Daniel would even be a welcomed sight, especially if he brought a chess set or cards along with him. Anything was better than being left alone to dwell on his past.
O'Neill had promised to help him, he thought as he looked over at the door. Where was he? Jack hated waiting, it was never a good thing as far as he was concerned and O'Neill knew this. He sat there staring out at the room beyond the bars of his cell, wishing with all his might that the door would open.
He was shocked when it did, although he didn't get everything he wished for. It was only the airman bringing him his lunch. Jack stayed on the bunk while the airman and his companion went through the usual ritual of unlocking the cell door, setting the tray down on the floor, then locking the door before standing on the other side of the bars to wait for him to finish.
He sighed before getting up to go pick up the tray. Just once he'd like to see them do a dance or something to break up this monotony. He sat back down and began to eat, watching the guards warily as he munched on the sandwich. They seemed to be uncomfortable with his staring, which caused him to continue staring at them just for spite. Yep, he could get away with a lot in this place.
He finished his lunch, then drank the lemonade someone had thoughtfully put on the tray. It was something he had often dreamed of drinking during the long hot days he'd spent on Hulmeshur. Well, when he wasn't thinking about a cold, long neck bottle of beer.
The guards left him alone when he'd finally set the tray back down on the floor and shuffled himself back to the bed. This routine was getting old quick and Jack was really hoping that his counterpart would hurry up and get him out of this place. He lay down on the bed to try to relax, but he was too worried about impending nightmares to allow for that. The silence of the room, along with the heat and a full stomach, finally lulled him into sleep anyway.
Pain. Overbearing, suffocating pain was pulling at him, forcing him to give into the screams that ripped from his throat and destroyed the silence that permeated the room. It tore at him as he fought for breath and for relief. Neither was available to him at the moment and he bellowed out his agony at the men who were enjoying this way too much.
Jack struggled to sit up, but knew defeat as the clamp was tightened around his body, squeezing the air from his lungs while refusing to allow any air to come back in. He could feel the bones in his ribs crack under the strain while the pressure became unbearable and his vision dimmed due to the lack of oxygen. He was released suddenly, but he knew that once he was breathing steadily again the torture would be repeated. These guys knew what they were doing and Jack wished they would just kill him and get it over with.
"Jack!" one of the guards shouted at him. "Wake up! C'mon buddy, wake up!"
Jack opened his eyes to find O'Neill, Daniel and Teal'c standing over him. He panicked for a second, thinking that they were only illusions his mind had conjured up to help him deal with the torture, but relaxed when he saw the bars of the cell beyond his friends and remembered where he was. It had only been a dream, he told himself as his heart began to slow down, only a dream.
"O'Neill?" he asked, trying to wipe the cobwebs from his mind. Where'd he come from? He sat up suddenly when everything came back clearly to him. O'Neill was here to give him his freedom.
"Yeah," O'Neill said, looking a little relieved. "That had to be some dream," he added with enthusiasm. "Are you going to be okay?"
Jack nodded, watching for any signs of another betrayal. He had gotten his hopes up that he would be leaving this place. Would this latest dream cause them to change their minds?
"I am so ready to blow this place," he said in response. "When do we leave?" O'Neill didn't respond, but he didn't have to. Jack could see it in his eyes. "You son of a bitch," he raged, "You said you'd get me out of here."
"I said I would try," O'Neill responded as he tried to reason with Jack, but Jack couldn't let it go this way. He was going to lose it if he didn't get out of this rat hole.
"I can't stay here," he insisted. "I'm still a prisoner. I might as well be back on that planet."
"You still aren't one hundred percent ready to face the world, Jack," Daniel butt in, always the peacekeeper. "You're better off here than out there beating the crap out of everyone who reminds you of Hulmeshur."
"I can handle it Daniel," Jack insisted. "I haven't done anything to anyone since the other night. I'm much better and I'm ready to leave."
"What about what just happened here?" O'Neill asked quietly. Jack turned to look at him, wondering if he should ask what it was that just happened. He had been dreaming, surely he hadn't hurt anyone.
"It was just a dream," he said, worried now that it had been more than that. His friends didn't look like they had been hurt, but maybe… No, he wasn't going to give in to their wishes. He wanted out and he wanted out now. "Nothing more than that."
"It could have been." O'Neill just wouldn't give it up. Jack knew that his counterpart was going to try to smooth over his failure, but he couldn't let him. It was his sanity at stake here.
"You couldn't talk them into releasing me, could you?" Jack accused. He debated over the wisdom of hitting the bastard, but wisely realized it wouldn't do him a bit of good, not to mention give them one more reason to keep him locked up.
"No," O'Neill said. "I tried, but even I have to agree that you are better off here. I've made arrange…"
"That's easy for you to say," Jack interrupted. He wasn't interested in anything the General had to say anymore. He just wanted him to get him out of there. "It's not you sitting here."
"No it's not," O'Neill agreed. Jack waited for him to tell him that he had been kidding, but O'Neill kept his silence. There really wasn't much to say after that.
"Get the hell out of here then," he yelled, completely forgetting the fact that he was a Lieutenant and the man he was yelling at was a General. The worst they could do to him now was court martial him for insubordination. He just didn't care at that point.
"I came out here to help you and I plan to go through with it," O'Neill said with determination. "Teal'c and I will be staying with you to help you get through the worst of the memories…"
"I don't need your help," Jack snarled. He was just so tired of the disappointments he was destined to go through. He pulled his feet up on the bed and settled into the huddle he had become accustomed to since his arrival in this cell.
"Stop interrupting me," O'Neill demanded. "Just let me tell you what's on the menu before you tell me to go to hell."
"You mean I haven't done that yet?" Jack asked, his anger pushing him to say things he normally wouldn't have dared to do with a camera recording his every word. "Well, let me rectify that mistake. Go to hell General O'Neill."
The venom in his voice rattled O'Neill, Jack could tell, but at this moment in time he couldn't care less. He glared at O'Neill, who had sat down next to him, his face reflecting the rage that had settled in. "I've already been there," O'Neill snarled menacingly. "As you well know. And I'll tell you right here and now that the only reason I am letting you get away with that remark is because I can relate to the anger. I will not let it slide the next time, you understand me?"
"Considering the fact that I'm facing a lifetime in this cell, that particular threat doesn't have me shaking in my boots," Jack responded acidly. "You are just as bad as the others," he continued. "Tell me one thing, while doing just the opposite. I don't know - for some reason I thought you would be different."
"I tried Jack," O'Neill said, his anger easing up somewhat. "But I happen to agree with General Landry. We can't take the chance that you won't go ballistic on some poor unsuspecting soul."
"Fine," Jack said. "I get the point. I'm to stay locked up in this cell, waiting patiently for the day when I finally get over the urge to punch out this bed. What fun. So why are you still here?"
"I'm here to help you," O'Neill responded resolutely, although he was still angry. Jack hoped he would just take his anger and get out.
"We all are," Daniel jumped in.
"Help me? So when do we leave?" he asked stubbornly.
"When you are ready and not before," O'Neill responded just as stubbornly. "The camera will be taken out sometime today and Teal'c and I will be staying with you while you punch out the bed." He smiled when he said that, but Jack wasn't falling for it.
"I want out of here," he insisted. "We could go to the house. It may need to be aired out, but it would be better than this place. God Jack, don't make me beg."
He knew total frustration when O'Neill sadly shook his head. "We'll make do with this place," he said to placate Jack. "I'll even bring in some pictures to make it look like home."
Jack didn't respond. He had lost his freedom. All that work he had put into keeping his cool was for nothing. He put his chin down on his knees and stared out at the bars of his cell. Why had he even thought that O'Neill would be his savior? The man couldn't even free himself from his own demons.
"We'll get you through this Jack," Daniel said as he sat down on the bed next to him. Jack didn't respond nor look at his friend. He was so doomed. He continued to stare out at the bars while Daniel tried to get through his depression. "Whatever it takes, we are all here for you."
Jack closed his eyes as he heard Taria's voice filter through his thoughts, telling him that she would never do anything to hurt him ever again. He had wanted to believe her just as he wanted to believe Daniel and O'Neill, but he knew better. They had all betrayed him, giving him false hopes just to see him bleed when those hopes were dashed. Christ, how he hated them all.
"We will get you through this," O'Neill insisted, repeating Daniel's words as he stood up. "I'm going to go make the final arrangements for our sleepover. I'll be back in a little while."
Jack didn't move or even act like he'd heard him. He just sat there and stared out at nothing, listening to Taria's laughter ringing through his ears.