By animeninjaNIPPON

The downward spiral that always followed Johnny's brief period of joy hit the very next day, as expected. He expressed his lament as he paced across one of his many torture chambers.

"Everyone's always trying to piss me off," he muttered, strolling past several incarcerated morons, including the greasy-haired jerk that tried to start up a road rage with him those three-odd weeks ago.

"Come on, Nny, anger can be good. Anger IS good. If you can feel anger, you can feel warmth. When you feel warmth, you'll be exposed to a new range of feelings that will allow you to LIVE..."

A quick, surprised spin allowed Johnny to see Rev. MEAT standing about five feet away. "When did you start moving?"

"You put me here yesterday."

Johnny's eyes narrowed. "Don't give me anymore of that 'feeling' bullshit, you...meat guy. Nothing good comes out of feeling anything - LOOK AT WHAT MY ANGER HAS DONE!" He threw his arm out to gesture toward the myriads of prisoners on the wall and in boxes, most of whom were unconscious.

"Then don't be ANGRY," Rev. MEAT continued, "although it appears to be sustaining you just fine. Try being happy - ecstasy has done a lot for you in the past...remember that girl?"

"SHUT UP!" Johnny covered his ears. "Don't you see? Everybody disgusts me! Even those that I cared about would have turned against me if I'd let them live!" His voice nearly cracked from the unnatural octave it reached.

"Not Squee...you let him live."

"He's just a kid. What would he know about my problems?"

"Not anymore, he's not. And judging by that bear he still sleeps next to, he probably has his own manifestations..."

How the Hell did Rev. MEAT know all of this? Could one's own inner demons sense the presence of those of other people?

"How do you..." Johnny began.

"Don't act surprised that I'm so well-informed about such things. I am a part of you. Cheese is good."

Johnny thought back to the other day when he thrashed his former neighbor's room while looking for a Band-Aid. The happy-faced wallpaper had been replaced by vertical gray-and-white stripes, but otherwise, it was the same old Squee... Suddenly, he remembered something Rev. MEAT had said about always being a slave to something. He looked at the Bub's Burger Boy statue straight on. "What the fuck would I talk to him about - monkeys?"

No answer.

"Hello? Reverend MEAT?"

The figure in question was gone.

"Unchain me, you skinny little shit!" a shirtless man yelled from the wall.

Nny plodded up the stairs. "God, I hate this..."

-----

The silhouette of a tall, lanky man lurked just outside of Squee's bedroom window. Johnny hadn't gone there because of Rev. MEAT, per se; he just wanted to be away from all those flies with their unyielding little minds. If nothing else, he could tell Squee about the movie he'd seen with the flesh-eating dinosaurs, up to the part where...or not.

He hoisted the glass up and stuck his head through the window. "Hey. Squee."

The petite figure that was Squee made a muffled noise and mumbled, "Shmee...you sound like Nny..."

"I am Nny." He spoke in a spooky Dracula voice.

"Huh?" That got the kid's attention. He sat up sleepily, rubbing one eye.

"Sorry to wake you up - I just wanted to make sure you weren't out indulging in some teenage wasteland. I don't want to see that sort of thing happen to you." Actually, he hadn't thought of a legitimate reason to be where he was, but what he said seemed plausible.

"I...I don't know." Squee was pretty sure he was dreaming.

Johnny leaned on the windowsill. "Yeah, well...umm...just making sure. I mean, you can easily be consumed by your hatred, and end up like..." Maybe it was Rev. MEAT's fault he was there with his old acquaintance...had he gone there of his own free will, he would have thought of something better to say.

Much to Nny's surprise, Squee saved the conversation. "I don't hate anybody. Not even my parents."

"Your parents..." Johnny repeated, trying to remember. "Oh. I see." He recalled hearing the boy's father giving a spiel on why he and Squee's mother hated their son. The conversation hadn't clicked at the time, but now it was starting to make sense.

"Sometimes Shmee thinks I should, though," Squee continued.

Johnny's eyes narrowed. "That bear speaks LIES! LIES, I tell you!" He turned to Squee, who stared back at him with wide-eyed shock. "Anyhow," he continued, "I have stuff to do - you probably have your own things to worry about, too, so I better go." He pulled away from the window. "Nice seeing you again."

He glanced back at the house one more time and saw Squee's head poking out the window. Johnny turned back around. "Hey, Squeegee, when's the last time you went to Taco Smell?"

"Uh...when I was fourteen, I think."

"Hmm, you need to get out more often. Have fun - OH DEAR GOD, it's MEAT again!" With that, he ran away screaming.

-----

Dear Die-Ary, he wrote yet again, My original goal was to give up all need for feelings and desire, and other such excess. I wanted to grow cold. I wanted to forsake my want. Now I realize, I have failed. Maybe it's because I let other parts of my mind get to me, and now I must succumb to those unholy thoughts again. Suicide is pointless, seeing as there is no way for me to die. Until I find some way to completely eliminate my drive for emotional being, I suppose I'll go on the way I've been going on...

Johnny put down his pen and looked up at the moon.

End of part six