Laws of Motion – Book 1
Written by: Ms Maggs / Edited by: KJT
Chapter 32
September 3, 2005
Nick and Carrie's Apartment
11:03 a.m.
Standing with Nick outside of their apartment door Carrie bubbled with excitement. "Ready for your big surprise!"
Nick adored the twinkle in her eyes and the carefree lilt of her voice after seeing her so vexed over Nurse Nasty. "You know it, open the door, Sweetheart."
"Close your eyes." Chewing her lip in nervous anticipation Carrie opened the door and took her fiancé's hand, guiding him until he was standing in front of their new fifty inch plasma TV. "Open your eyes!"
When Nick saw the mammoth screen his jaw dropped. "Whoa."
Although the answer was obvious, Carrie asked, "How do you think you'll like watching football on that?"
"Are you kidding!" He hurried over to inspect his new toy as fast as his sore body would allow. "I've been wantin' one of these ever since Greg got one for Christmas. I always thought it was cruel that he didn't like sports but had the best TV." Nick's eyes turned towards the couch "And look at what you did here." Grinning uncontrollably, he perused the scene. She had his Aggie stadium blanket and pillows set up so he could rest easy…a cooler of beverages, including non-alcoholic beer, so he could drink while taking his pain medication…bowls of traditional snacks…and the remote control for the new TV adorned with a gold bow and a note that said 'Love you!'. "This…"
Gushing from the pride of a job well done, Carrie cheered, "Welcome home and happy game day!"
"Just being home with you was more than enough but these perks are awesome." Grabbing Carrie's hand he pulled her in for an amorous kiss, which to his surprised she declined.
"Uh…Nicky…" She backed away twittering a smile.
"What's wrong, Darlin'?" He chuckled, "You saw me brush my teeth after breakfast."
"No…it's not…" Carrie pointed to her man's hairy face. "Sorry, .but now that you're out of the hospital, could you shave off that scruff because…"
"Really? I was thinking of keeping the beard…or maybe just a 'stache." With his fingertips he caressed his stubble.
"Yeah?" Carrie cringed at the notion. "Well…okay." Sighing, she voiced the ultimate encouragement for shaving, "Just don't expect me to kiss you or make love to you ever again, because the thought of you with a moustache makes me queasy."
The Body Farm
11:17 a.m.
After snapping a few pictures of Sean looming over the bloated body submerged from the chest down in scummy pond water Grissom asked, "Any signs of nausea?"
"No, Sir." Sean smiled proudly under his paper mask as he watched insects feast on a wound. "This is really what made my Uncle Nick vomit?"
"Yep." Grissom waved the camera. "And now we have photo proof that you did just fine and I'm going to have a wonderful time rubbing those photos in your uncle's face."
"What's next?" Sean anxiously inquired as his confidence grew. "I'm definitely ready for something a little more grotesque."
"Then I think you're ready for a body decomposing in a sealed car." Grissom pointed to the path and said with boyish zeal, "Follow me."
Keeping pace with his mentor Sean asked, "Where do all these bodies come from?"
"Two sources…unclaimed bodies are sent from the Coroner's office and the rest are pre-set donations." Grissom smiled inwardly as he pictured his corpse being delivered there after his eventual demise. "This is where my body will end up one day. I have it specified in my will. I even have a particular study scenario in mind."
"But how will your family visit your grave?" Sean asked, feeling a dose of sadness wash over him. "We've visited Grandma and Grandpa Hatcher's graves twice and when we were in California a couple of years ago we visited Grandma Blake's."
"I believe that my body is just a shell and therefore doesn't need to be preserved or visited."
"Oh." Sean readied to ask another round of questions. "Dr. Grissom…"
Oh no…I recognize that tone. He's about to spring another round of uncomfortable questions on me. "Yes?"
"While reading the Bible backwards last night I realized my brother will burn in a lake of fiery sulfur after he dies and I was wondering if you knew a way for him to save himself."
"Uh…" Grissom stared at the lad. "Let's start at the beginning. You read the Bible backwards?"
"Ryan told me he heard it helps relieve 'the pressure' if you don't want to do it the other way."
"Did it work?"
"Yes, quite well actually. I was so worried about my brother suffering in the eternal hellfire that I didn't have time to think about my other problem and before I knew it, it was gone."
"Ah, I see…" He grinned under the mask. "A little mind over matter."
"The Bible said that the sexually immoral, liars, idol worshippers and magic practitioners will all burn in the lake, but it also said that murderers would go there too. Ryan said he didn't buy it because it wasn't fair that Harry Potter readers go to the same place as murderers." Sean took in the sights of the body farm as they made their way to their destination. "I don't think it sounds fair either but I was taught in Sunday school that the Bible is absolutely true and I don't want to not believe because the unbelievers go to the fiery lake too. Do you see why I'm confused?"
"Absolutely," Grissom acknowledged while not sure how to field the topic since Wendy was a regular churchgoer and might not want her boy hearing his perspective on the good book. "My mother was a devout Catholic," he shared. "I attended mass with her twice a week and when I was about your age, I experienced a similar confusion when I read Leviticus. Have you read Leviticus backwards or forwards?"
"No, I haven't."
Smiling, Grissom came to rest in front of the rusted car. "Do you know what leprosy is?"
Sean nodded and answered the question as if he were in a classroom. "Yes, I did a paper on infectious diseases of ancient civilizations. It's an infection caused by the bacillus Mycobacterium Leprae. If left untreated it causes permanent damage to skin, nerves, limbs and eyes. It's still a public health problem in underdeveloped countries but can be successfully treated with a combination of three drugs."
"Excellent." Grissom took a deep breath and then bestowed the information he knew would turn Sean's Biblically influenced world upside down. "Leviticus fourteen dictates the treatment of leprosy as follows…gather two birds and kill one in an earthen vessel over running water. Sprinkle the blood of the dead bird on the leper seven times and let the living bird fly loose. Then get two lambs and kill one, putting the blood of the slain lamb on the leper's right ear, thumb and big toe. Then find two more birds and kill one, dipping the live bird in the dead bird's blood. Wipe the leper's right ear, thumb and toe with the blood of the dead bird and then go to the leper's house and shake the blood off the bird seven times." With that Grissom closed his example. "Do you think the aforementioned treatment would cure leprosy?"
"No…it couldn't possibly cure a bacterial disease." Then Sean realized what he just did. "Oh no…I guess that means I'm an unbeliever too." His shoulders sagged as he realized he'd be melting in the lake next to his brother.
"No, Sean…it means you're a free-thinker who has the ability to read and choose, rather than read and blindly accept. As a scientist you'll find yourself at odds with the Bible many times over, but that doesn't mean you have to toss the entire book." Grissom waved him closer to the car. "There are plenty of good rules to live by in the Bible. In Leviticus you'll also be told to be kind to neighbors and not steal…along with instructions not to eat shellfish."
"But the church pastor loves my mom's shrimp salad!" He held his head as his brain tried to make sense of it all.
Grissom could feel the tremor from the boy's world rocking. "Yeah…and my first case in Vegas involved a reverend who killed his ex-mistress because she was blackmailing him and threatening to tell his wife about his extra-marital affair." In a serious tone Grissom warned, "Add this to your crime solving tips file, Sean…never eliminate a suspect based on his religious convictions."
Ely State Prison
11:36 a.m.
As they did at eleven-thirty every Saturday, the twelve inmates of the Ely chapter of EPF, Evangelical Prison Fellowship, assembled in the prison library for Bible Study under the guidance of Reverend Hawkins and the watchful eye of several guards. Each time they met it was customary for one inmate, or a guest accompanying the Reverend, to share a testimonial of their faith.
"Amen," the Reverend pronounced at the end of his opening prayer. "My brothers in Christ, today we will be hearing from Brother Michael…a man who, over the last six months, has inspired me. He inspires me because he lives The Word…he lives many of the concepts some of you have only begun to contemplate…he has unending faith in the Lord…he boldly practices forgiveness…he helps his brethren…he is truly an example for us all. "
Sitting beside the gullible preacher, Mike Rodgers demonstrated a perfect level of humility. "Reverend…you are too generous."
In the corner of the room guard Ray Innes, one of several who were on Mike's payroll, tried not to laugh at the bullshit filling the room.
Reverend Hawkins, a solemn religious leader, gently placed his hand on the Mike's broad shoulder. "Enlighten us all with your words, Brother Michael."
With a humble nod of the head Mike stood. "Thank you for giving me the opportunity to speak today, Reverend." Across the room he saw his whore Janice grinning like the village idiot she was and he raised his right hand to give a shy wave. The phony gesture made her instantly giddy and to himself he laughed at her stupidity. "Uh…" He cleared his throat to augment his feigned nervousness. "This is a special day for me for several reasons. First off…I received confirmation today that I have met all the necessary correspondence course requirements to become ordained as a minister." Then, pressing his open palm to his heart he quietly shared, "Today is also my wedding anniversary and even though it saddens me that my loving wife is gone…I'm reminded I was once blessed enough to have a wonderful woman agree to marry me."
Wildfire Country Club
11:41 a.m.
When the moment Greg had dreamed about forever finally arrived, his excitement was uncontainable. "I'm ready!" he enthused while shucking his t-shirt and lying stomach down on a lounge chair outside his parents' reserved pool cabana. Finally he had a girl with him poolside on Labor Day weekend and not just any girl, the sexiest girl in the place. In a whisper he urged, "Okay…time to start rubbing on the sunscreen, Princess." He left his eyes open, hoping to spy some jealous male reactions, precisely the kind he used to emote when the roles were reversed and he was hard up.
Tawny winked at Bev and Scott who were sitting inside the cabana sipping iced tea and playing cards. "Time for the show."
They instantly put down their cards and moved their chairs for a better view. "He's been waiting over a decade for this," Bev whispered in her husband's ear. "I hope she plays it to the hilt."
Scott chuckled, "In that case, keep your cell handy to call 911 because Stan Warner has a weak heart and he's already gawking at Tawny and breathing erratically."
With her baggy swimsuit cover-up hiding her sexy bikini, Tawny stepped beyond the canvas walls into the sunlight. Arching her back she reached up to free her bundled blonde locks from a clip. "Mmm…that sun is hot," she moaned while her hair cascaded over her shoulders. "You better get some sunscreen on you, Greggy."
"Really? But I just got comfortable," Greg whined as if he were annoyed by the inconvenience. "Okay…yeah…you're probably right. Would you do my back?"
Shaking his head in disbelief Scott whispered to his wife, "And you were worried about hearing them having clown sex? They're playing out bad porn in front of us."
Bev covered her smile. "How wrong is it that I think it's cute?"
"Princess…" Greg tamed his smile and glanced up. "You should probably take off that white cover-up first because it's new and you don't want to get any oily stuff on it."
"Oooh!" Tawny covered her mouth and giggled, "Good point!"
Across the pool from the Sanders cabana, Charlie watched Tawny unzipping her shirt slow enough to torture him and remarked to his buddy, "Damn…for an Amish girl, she could give a stripper a run for her money."
Clutching her unzipped shirt Tawny timidly admitted, "I'm a little shy about wearing a bathing suit in front of so many people." She glanced around and slowly let the garment slip off her shoulders.
"Take it off!" Stan Warner wheezed from the next cabana while turning up his portable oxygen tank a notch.
Upon seeing the old man's smile Bev readied her cell phone. "He hasn't even seen her breasts yet!"'
As soon as Tawny shucked her shirt, four of the clubs cattiest women in the pool area gathered to gossip...
"Designer?"
"Asha Couture."
"It's the same one the Sports Illustrated model wore."
"Who did her work?"
"Did Howie do her work?"
"Are you sure that's an Asha Couture swimsuit?"
"She's Amish!"
"I can't believe she's with Sanders."
"Bev has to be paying her."
"That suit looked better on the model. Don't you guys think she should lose a little weight?"
"If she lost more weight in the bottom she'd fall over from being top heavy."
"Wait a minute…I think she has a pooch. Dammit, I wish we had binoculars."
"Hey…I think you're right."
"She's pregnant!"
"It could be bloat from that time of the month."
"Why would she be with Sanders unless she trapped him for cash?"
"Ugh…another trust fund boy trapped at Wildfire Country Club. That's so cliché."
"Hold up…Becca told me Sanders doesn't have a trust fund."
"He doesn't? Bev's loaded, how could he not have a TF?"
"Duh…because she's a controlling over protective freak of a mother."
"Right."
"Are you sure that suit is Asha?"
"Who cares about the suit when she has a pooched belly?"
"Who's going to confirm? Cindy, you met her yesterday, try to get it out of her."
"Okay, I'll wait until I see her head for the restroom and then I'll follow her."
When Stan Warner started clapping Bev said, "Time to turn it down a notch, kids. Oh, and, Greg…Dr. Dan is fast approaching."
"Here we go," Greg groaned as the party ended. "Time to maul me while checking his handiwork."
"Let's see my handiwork!" Dr. Dan exclaimed while puffing on a Cuban cigar. "How many years has it been since you flew out for surgery?"
"Almost three," Greg answered while the doctor inspected his back.
"The scars are fading a little more each year," Bev warmly greeted their family friend.
"You must be Tawny…yeah…the club is abuzz over you and now I know why." The bronzed fifty-seven year old plastic surgeon grinned at the buxom girl's chest. "It's a pleasure."
Tawny smiled at the pervert. "Hi there…my face is up here." She pointed to her head. "Up! A little more…more." When his gaze slowly moved north she praised, "There you go. Nice to meet you too."
Whispering Pines
12:04 p.m.
When Ellie arrived at her room she pointed to the breasty blonde eighteen year old sitting by the window and groaned, "Dad…Heather…that's my roommate…Malibu Barbie. Careful, the glare from her teeth may blind you, and don't get too close to her boobs, they're solid plastic."
The forlorn girl, Katrina Bowers, lowered her cigarette and snapped out of her daze just in time to snark, "It's lovely to meet you both and, Mr. Brass…my condolences for having such a skanky bitch for a daughter."
Heather's lips eased into a smile. "It's so nice that you're making friends here, Ellie."
"Yeah…I'm hoping she'll be able to come home with me for Thanksgiving so we can hit the mall together for the after holiday sale," Ellie giddily announced before sticking her finger in her mouth to fake gagging. "As if I'd go shopping with Barbie."
Katrina rolled her eyes as she crossed the room to exit. "As if I'd shop sales, or be seen in public with a thrift store queen like you, Tramparella."
Jim nodded at Heather. "I'm feeling the love, are you feeling the love?"
Once her irritating roommate was gone Ellie plopped down on her bed. "She'd be much easier to take if I was wasted. I think they gave her to me on purpose to test my resistance."
"Tramparella?" Heather posited as she walked around the room taking in the stark atmosphere. "How did she come up with that?"
"In group I talked about trading sex for drugs and she thought it would be clever to rub that in my face." Ellie kicked off her shoes and propped up on her elbow. "The chick is so dense she can't even see she was doing the same thing only with a richer guy who wasn't upfront about the trade. At least I knew the score…I think that makes me a helluva lot smarter than her. You know why she was sitting by the window? She's waiting to see if her boyfriend shows up by surprise. The guy normally doesn't even return her phone calls, but today he answered and talked to her for two minutes…she's been salivating like a dog ever since." Rolling onto her back Ellie sighed, "I may be a lot of things but I'm not delusional. Ugh…and that purse she has…nine hundred bucks! Her daddy mailed it to her. He mailed a nine hundred dollar purse to a rehab center in the middle of a friggin' forest in Arizona. Hello? How is that hideous pink purse supposed to help get her through the day?" She rolled her eyes. "I think we all know where she gets her intelligence."
Heather smiled at Jim. "This is probably a good time to give her your gift."
"Don't you worry, Sweetie…Daddy got you a thousand dollar purse to carrying around in the middle of nowhere." Chuckling he sat on the edge of the bed and reached into the small paper shopping bag. "No, I'm afraid I opted for practicality and humor…I got twenty-four packs of gum to help with your cravings, and an LVPD Vice Squad t-shirt so you could wear it and freak out the inmates with post-traumatic arrest disorder."
"Thanks, Daddy." Ellie accepted the gifts with a smile. "These are much cooler than an overpriced prissy pink purse."
"I got you a little something too." Heather crossed the room to fetch her twelve hundred dollar purse, opened it and pulled out a brown envelope. "It's a job application for the Dominion. Your father caved last night. He'll approve you working for me as long as you're not on the frontlines."
"Really!" Ellie jumped off the bed to snatch the envelope. "Thanks for being cool about this, Daddy."
"What can I say?" Jim slapped on his sunglasses. "I'm a real cool Daddy-O."
"Uh…you were until you said that," Ellie quipped while perusing the form in her hand. "I'm a little bummed I won't be whipping and berating submissive guys with freaky fetishes but, I'm psyched just to get my leather boot in the Dominion's door."
"I'll have you work in booking," Heather informed her future employee. "You'll get to hear what the submissive guys want and maybe that will give you your fix. Of course, you'll have to book the dominant men as well…and without sharing your disparaging opinion of them. Think you can manage that?"
Ellie glanced over at her father. "I don't think it's in my blood to keep my mouth shut when I disagree. Right, Daddy? It's genetic and I get it from you? That and my smile."
"That's right, Honey," Jim breathed through the moment. "But you'll come to terms with something I learned years ago…it's okay to kiss ass when you need a paycheck."
Nick and Carrie's Apartment
12:14 p.m.
"I didn't think we were expecting company until later, Darlin'," Nick yelled from the couch into the bedroom when he heard the doorbell ring.
"Don't move!" Carrie shouted back as she dashed out of the bedroom. "You just got settled and comfortable after your shower." On the way to the door she stole a kiss from her freshly shaven man. "Mmm…now that you're sans facial hair your sex appeal is back." Smacking her lips she resumed her trip to the door.
Watching her peek through the peephole he asked, "Who is it?"
"It's David Hodges and a woman."
"Ooh…I bet he's here sucking up and she's his overnight wife we heard about at the party last week." Nick scooted up on the couch. "This should be good."
When Carrie opened the door she flashed a welcoming smile. "Hi."
"Hi!" Hodges enthusiastically greeted. "We went to the hospital to visit Nick but they said he'd been released so we took a chance and dropped by. Is this a good time?"
"You bet." Carrie opened the door wider so Hodges would be able to fit the jumbo gift basket full of football-themed items and snacks through the door. "Come on in."
"Hey, Hodges," Nick warmly greeted from the couch. "Thanks for checking in on me. And who is this beautiful woman you managed to snag?" He winked in her direction. "I'm Nick, by the way."
"Oh! Sorry! Introductions…" Hodges set down the gift basket and sucked up, "That's for you, Boss…Happy Aggie Season Opener! I'm sure they're going to kick Clamson's ass."
"That would be Clemson…and I'm sure they will." Checking out the basket Nick said, "Wow…thanks. This is really cool of you, but I hope you didn't feel obligated to do this just because I'm your boss now. You don't need to suck up to me like you tried to do with Grissom, just do your job well and follow the rules and we'll be fine."
"No…no," Hodges vehemently lied. "I'm not sucking up…no…I've always considered you a good friend even though we've never socialized outside of the lab once in the last three years and you were hesitant to give me your home phone number for fear I'd call you."
Shutting the door Carrie tried not to laugh. "I'm Carrie by the way. I'll grab some drinks. Is iced tea okay?"
"I'm Celeste," the impatient significant other finally introduced herself. "David's wife. I'm glad you're on the road to recovery, Nick. And yes, iced tea would be great, thanks."
"Sorry!" Hodges wrapped his arm around his wife's shoulder. "This is my better half."
"Yeah…" Nick chuckled before winking at Celeste. "I had no doubt about that."
"That's the second time you've winked at my wife," Hodges pointed out in a huff. "Are you flirting with her?"
"Huh?" Clueless, Nick looked at the blushing woman. "Did I really?"
From the kitchen entrance Carrie teasingly said, "Don't worry, David…he winks at every woman. He's been doing it since he was sixteen, so it's a hard habit to break. I don't let it bother me, and neither should you."
"I'll help you with the iced tea," Celeste offered as she joined Carrie at the kitchen door.
"Way to go, Hodges." Nick gave him a thumbs up. "She's real cute."
"Yeah…" His shoulders sagged. "Too bad I don't get to keep her."
"Huh?"
Hodges took a seat in an armchair then froze. "Wait…was this Carrie's furniture, or was it yours before you met her? Or did you buy it new when you moved in together?"
"It's all Carrie's…she bought it new when she moved here before I moved in with her."
"Okay, good." Hodges relaxed back against the leather.
"What the…" Nick stared at the man. "What difference does it make whose chair it was?"
"I was concerned over the action and germs it would have seen if it was your old stuff." He shivered. "Especially Sofia germs…blech. I don't get that at all. Did you have some kind of ego crash and believe you were desperate?"
"It would appear you're out of 'suck up mode' and diving head first into 'career ending piss off the boss mode'."
"Sorry…sorry." He gripped his forehead. "I'm under a lot of personal stress. I have less than five months before I get a divorce."
"About that…" Nick grabbed a fake beer from the cooler Carrie had stocked for him. "…you were going to explain the temporary wife thing before you went on that tangent insulting me, my dating history and the cleanliness of my old furniture."
"Right…" Leaning in he whispered, "When I first met Celeste I thought it wouldn't work out because I'm deathly allergic to ferrets, but then I realized I could get allergy shots and…"
"Hold up…guys really do that? 'Cause there's this woman I knew once who had a chinchilla and when I said I was allergic to it…"
"I didn't know you were allergic to chinchillas."
"I'm not." Nick shrugged. "Well I suppose I don't know for sure because I've not spent quality time with one, but my point was…she got pissed off at me and said if I really cared about her I would have offered to get shots. That seems like a lot to go through for a woman."
"Oh, give me a break." Hodges rolled his eyes. "If Carrie was suddenly allergic to your right arm tomorrow, you'd cut it off to keep her. Chinchilla chick just wasn't worth shots to you. Celeste is worth shots to me…I'd do anything for her…" He lowered his voice to a whisper, "…except impregnate her."
Meanwhile in the kitchen, Celeste was breaking down in front of a woman she had only met minutes prior. "It's so maddening, because I love everything about him…"
"Here!" Carrie hurried over with a pile of napkins for the poor woman's tears.
"Thanks for the napkins and listening to me ramble." She blew her nose hard. "David and I have so much in common…we love watching the Six Million Dollar Man and both crave cream soda late at night."
"Ooh…I love cream soda!" Then Carrie grimaced. "But the Six Million Dollar Man…not so much. He gave me the creeps."
"He's even getting allergy shots because he's allergic to my ferrets," Celeste sniffled. "David's getting the shots…not the Six Million Dollar Man, but I'm sure Steve Austin would have gotten shots if Jamie had ferrets and he was allergic to them." Reaching into her purse she grabbed her wallet. "Do you want to see my babies?"
"Sure…I love animals," Carrie enthused as she moved closer to the weepy woman. "Nicky and I are going to get a dog when we move into a house. We don't know what kind yet because we're just going to pick one from the animal shelter."
"Here they are…" With pride Celeste showed the professionally taken photos. That's Princess Gwendolyn and this is Prince Xavier."
"Awwwww…they're adorable."
"And if I stay married to David they're the only kids I'll ever have," she sobbed into her wad of napkins.
Back in the living room Nick was throwing a pillow at Hodges. "What! Are you insane? You found a woman who actually wants to have your seed growing inside her and you tell her you don't want to have kids with her? Dude…I've worked with you for years and you're a real bitter pill ninety percent of the time; I'm shocked you got one offer, I doubt women will be lining up in the future."
"No, Jocko…ugh…the drugs must be making you slower than normal." Hodges huffed, "I don't want to have kids period. I don't gel with kids. But if I wanted to have them, I'd want them with Celeste. The problem is she's dying to have kids, and it's breaking her heart that I can't get into it. She said…"
"Hey!" Nick gaped at his employee. "Did you just say the drugs must be making me slower than normal and call me Jocko? You think I'm just a big 'ol stupid jock, don't ya?"
"You did think cows drank milk." Realizing he blurted yet again, Hodges glanced at his watch and slowly rose to his feet. "Look at the time! Celeste needs to feed her ferrets so we should probably…"
"Sit!"
"Yes, Boss."
"On second thought…get up and go to that closet over there." Nick pointed toward the hall. "Grab Trivial Pursuit and we'll see who knows more."
"Look…I don't want to humiliate you. I'm a board game fanatic and…"
Gritting his teeth Nick blasted, "Bring the damn game over here now! And if you're so confident in your winning ability, let's wager."
"Okay…" Hodges selected Trivial Pursuit Genus 5. "If I win, you have to kiss my ass at work for a week when you return."
"Fair enough." Nick kicked his feet up on the coffee table and sipped his faux beer. "If I win, you have to impregnate your wife."
"What!" Hodges plunked down the game. "Are you high!"
"As a matter of fact I am…I doubled up on my Vicodin for the ride home."
Hodges nervously paced the room. "Let's say the impossible happens and you win. Then what? I'm supposed to tell my progeny that he or she was only conceived because I lost at Trivial Pursuit?"
Nick laughed heartily into his faux-beer. "Hell…it's a lot better than the embarrassing story Greg has to tell his twins. At least you'll be intentionally conceiving with a woman whose last name you know."
"Okay, fine…you're on." Hodges sat down and set up the board.
Extending his hand Nick forced Hodges to shake on it. "I'm blue. You can go first."
"Just to show you I have no fear…I'll move and intentionally land on Sports and Leisure when I could have chosen Science." As Nick was pulling the question card Hodges chanted, "Let it be Leisure, not sports. Leisure, not sports. Come on leisure."
Nick pulled out the first card. "Ha! What NFL position players pick uniform numbers from 80 to 89?" Seconds later he said, "You don't know the answer so just guess."
"Tightbacks!"
"Wrong! And FYI…there's no such thing as a tightback, Mr. Know It All." Nick didn't even look at the card for the answer. "Receivers."
Hodges tensely watched as Nick rolled a six and moved his piece.
"Arts and Entertainment for a piece of pie."
Hodges grabbed a card and rejoiced, "Good…it's not from a testosterone-infused movie so you probably haven't seen it. What do J.K. Rowling's wizards call people with 'not a drop of magical blood in their veins?"
"Muggles! And believe it or not I learned that from reading the book. Not too shabby for a dumb jock, huh?" Nick whooped and clapped as Hodges fished out a pink piece of pie, "Look who's in the lead. That would be me, baby!"
Wildfire Country Club
12:44 p.m.
When Tawny emerged from the stall and approached the restroom sink she saw a woman she recognized. "I met you yesterday, right? Cindy?"
"That's right." The thirty-four year old Ad Executive eyed the girl's midsection. "Cute wrap."
"Thanks." Tawny smoothed her hands over the garment. "It's Bev's actually. I'm just borrowing it."
"So…you don't drink alcohol or smoke. Did you give those up recently as some sort of health choice or did you always abstain?"
"I was raised Amish and we…"
"Oh, that's right." Cindy smiled deviously. "Do you horseback ride or teeter at the top of winding staircases while wearing heels?"
"Huh?" Then Tawny realized what was really going on. "Is that your roundabout, and very lame, way of asking me if I'm pregnant?"
"I think you are." Cindy studied the pensive look on the girl's face. "Yep…definitely."
Tossing her paper towel Tawny grinned, "That's right, I am."
"And yet, no ring on your finger?" Cindy leaned against the counter. "What's up with that? Is he waiting to see if the pregnancy is viable before saying he'll marry you? Or is Bev pulling the strings and hasn't given him permission yet. Oh…I bet you're still waiting for paternity results."
Tawny laughed in the woman's face. "Were you having a shitty day so you decided to follow me into the bathroom and pick on me, hoping you'd make me feel bad?" Flipping her hair off her shoulders Tawny postured. "Sorry…didn't work."
Cindy held her head high and walked out the door just as Bebe Kowalski was ready to stroll in. "I hope there's enough room for your fakies in there, because hers are already crowding the place," she cackled while strutting by.
When Tawny turned around she was faced with the woman Greg said Becca referred to as Miss Stripper Tits. The woman marrying Howie Green, the biggest nerd in their prep school and now a very successful plastic surgeon…but still a nerd. "Hi."
"Hi…you're with Greg Sanders, Yeah, I've heard all about you…gorgeous, uneducated farm girl and sweet as pie." Bebe walked to the mirror and pulled out her plum lipstick. "So…are the jealous chicks calling you Stripper Tits too, or did they give you an original name?"
"I don't know what they're calling me. Where did you dance? LA?" Tawny asked, wondering how long the woman had been retired.
"Are you kidding?" She laughed riotously. "I'm soooo uncoordinated I can't dance. Even with these tits, no one would have paid me if they saw me klutzing around on stage. No, I was a waitress working two jobs before I got engaged. I had finally saved up enough money for a breast reduction after being picked on for having these giant jugs since I was in 7th grade. That's how I met my fiancé, Howie…he was the plastic surgeon I saw for a consult. I let people think I was a dancer who met him when I got implants, because it's nice to have a little intrigue in my life for once."
Tawny giggled at the notion of the woman wanting to fake what she was desperately trying to hide. "So…did Howie talk you out of the reduction?"
"Nah…I can't get it yet because I got pregnant."
"Ooh! I'm pregnant too!" Tawny jubilated, happy to have something else in common with the other new girl at the club. "How far along are you!"
"Fourteen weeks." Putting away her lipstick Bebe asked, "So, what story did you use? Birth control pills didn't work because you were on antibiotics? Or…"
"Excuse me?"
"To trap your Richie Rich?" Bebe tossed her lipstick in her Kate Spade purse. "Before I put the condom on Howie I tore the tip. Worked like a charm on the first try. Now I'm on easy street for the rest of my life…and the nice part is, Howie's tolerable and doesn't knock me around like my Ex." She flashed her rock of a ring. "Let's see yours."
"Um…" Holding her stomach Tawny headed for the door. "I have to go."
As soon as she stepped outside the restroom she saw Cindy speaking with three other women who all turned to glare at her. Tears forming in her eyes Tawny hurried to the pool area and once there she grabbed Greg, who was alone in the cabana snacking on crudités. "I want to leave."
"Why?" When he saw the emotion building in her eyes and he held her tight. "What happened?"
"In about ten seconds this whole place will be calling me a conniving gold digger who got knocked up on purpose just to trap you into marrying me. Cindy cornered me in the bathroom and I didn't want to seem ashamed so I confirmed I was pregnant. She's already telling the first group of people outside the restroom." Holding her head she fought to bite back her tears. "I want to go, and I don't want to come back here the rest of the weekend."
"No!" Greg panicked that his proposal plans would be ruined. "Robbie and Joyce are going to be here any minute to hang with us."
"Please, Greg!"
"Okay…okay…but we have to come back tonight for the big party because..."
"I can't…" she sniffled into his chest. "I know the majority of the people here are very nice, but after last night with Becca, I'm tired of women trying to make a fool out of me. We just got rid of her and now a new witch pops up."
Watching Tawny cry, Greg suddenly had a brainstorm. "What!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. "Really! Oh my God! I don't believe it!"
"What are you doing?" Puzzled by the outrageously joyful look on Greg's face, Tawny wiped her tears.
Bev and Scott hurried over from four cabanas down and Scott asked in a concerned tone, "What's going on, Son? Why are you screaming? Everyone is staring at you."
"Yes!" Rushing over to the lifeguard stand Greg stole the burly man's megaphone. "Attention everyone who isn't already staring at me!"
Bev's fingers practically ripped out her hair while she heatedly whispered to her husband, "I'll strangle him for scrapping the plan and proposing now. I can't believe he's doing this after the lengths I went to for him!"
Tawny stood frozen as Greg grabbed her hand. "But it's not sunset yet."
"I know." After winking at Tawny, Greg shouted into the megaphone, "Everyone! I just found out the most wonderful news and it's so fantastic I feel like shouting it from a mountaintop, but shouting it here will have to do because I'm too impatient to drive out to a mountaintop!" When he was certain every pair of eyes was on him, he joyously shared, "Tawny was told by doctors that she'd never be able to get pregnant naturally…that one day when we wanted to have kids, we'd have to utilize in-vitro fertilization. Knowing that, we didn't bother using any protection but, she just told me she's pregnant! I'm going to be a daddy! I'm thrilled! It's a miracle! Woo hoo!" After tossing the megaphone he kissed Tawny with the passion of a soldier going off to war.
Once Bev's breathing resumed she said, "And that was because?"
"My guess would be one of the gossipmongers found out Tawny's pregnant and our brilliant son just launched a pre-emptive strike before the rumors started to fly." Grinning, Scott picked up the megaphone to help the cause. "A round of drinks on the grandparents to be!"
The pool area exploded with cheers and applause and when Greg and Tawny saw Cindy the Gossip arrive and breathlessly ask someone 'what did I miss' they exchanged giddy smiles and Tawny whispered to her future fiancé, "I love your brain."
The Blakes
3:07 p.m.
When Sara saw Gil's Mercedes pulling up to the curb she shouted from the living room window, "The bug-obsessed brainiacs are back from the body farm!"
"Oh thank goodness!" Wendy rushed out of the kitchen wiping her hands on a dishtowel. "I mean…I wasn't worried about Sean being with Gil…"
Sara held up her hand and released a smile. "You really don't have to justify worrying about your impressionable teenage boy hanging out with a forty-nine year old man who has cockroaches for pets and gets excited over examining maggots on rotting flesh."
"Okay, thanks." Wendy dropped her act. "I'm so glad they're back!"
When the door flew open, Sean rushed inside jubilantly shouting, "I didn't vomit! Mom! I didn't even gag at the bloated body covered in bugs like Uncle Nick did. Dr. Grissom has pictures to prove it."
"Yay!" Wendy replied, unsure if her son's blasé reaction to the rotting dead was a good thing, or a sign of an emotional detachment disorder.
"The tour of the body farm was the best birthday gift ever!" Sean announced as he smiled at his mentor. "Thanks again, Dr. Grissom. Oh and Mom…look what else he gave me..." He produced a duffel bag and hurried to zip it open. "My very own ALS and accessories!"
Wendy stepped back and looked to Gil. "That had to cost a lot."
Gil shook his head in the concerned mother's direction, "I had several old ones so and thought it would be nice to share my toys. I thought you'd prefer the ALS over an autopsy tool kit."
Sara clarified, "He's joking…he never considered giving him that." She hoped so anyway.
After hearing voices in the living room, Ryan emerged from the kitchen tossing up his football. "Hey…you're back from your birthday party with the decomposing dead! So, Bro…tell me, how did it feel to be the life of the party for a change? Ha!" He fell back on the couch cracking up at his own joke.
"We took pictures," Gil announced while taking a seat on the couch next to the irritating boy and accessing the juiciest one on his digital camera. "Look…"
"Ah!" Ryan jumped back. "Are you trying to give me nightmares?"
"Speaking of nightmares…" Sara walked over and snatched the camera from her child-scaring husband. "Carrie called Wendy earlier and said that Nick was up for company and watching football with his nephews after all. I said we'd be happy to drive the boys and McKenna over and watch some gridiron goodness for awhile so Wendy could have a break and take a nap when Ashley goes down shortly."
Gil smiled brightly at his wife, "Fantastic…you know there's nothing I like better on my day off than watching football or having root canal."
Whispering Pines
3:31p.m.
As Ellie hugged her father goodbye she said, "Don't go all sappy sweet on me because I'm already eating a ton of candy to ward off cravings and I don't have dental insurance."
"You will when you work for me," Heather cheerily informed her. "I take care of my girls. You'll have educational assistance money too, and I'll expect you to enroll in at least one community college class. It doesn't have to be academic, it can be photography, ballet or pottery…anything that excites you and gets you back into the routine of going to school."
Jim kissed Ellie's cheek. "I promise I won't miss your recital this time if you choose ballet, and you already know I treasure any art projects you make me, because you found that old ashtray."
"Ouch." Ellie gripped her mouth. "You just gave me a cavity, Old Man." Then she saw who walked through the door. "Ugh…what's he doing here?"
"Who?" Jim turned and saw a young man wearing cowboy gear.
"Brad Pitt's in rehab?" Heather remarked while shaking her head. "He never should have broken up with Jennifer Aniston."
"Uh…no." Ellie laughed. "That's Ren the horse freak from Equine therapy. Apparently he knows one of your co-workers, Daddy and was told to keep an eye on me, which translated in Cowboy Lingo must mean ride me in class and not give me a god damn break. He's an ass."
Jim nodded. "Because you speak so highly of everyone here, I think you're a shoe-in for Most Popular at graduation, Honey."
"Hey there, Ms. Brass…how's my favorite reluctant rider?" Ren tipped his black Stetson. "Among other things, I was coming round to see if you were still sore from the other day."
Planting her hands on her hips Ellie snipped, "You mean when I slipped on horse shit, fell on my ass and everyone laughed at me?"
"Yeah…that would be the event to which I'm referring." He cracked a smile. "Howdy," he greeted the man and woman standing with his problematic student. "I'm Ren Clarke, I run the Equine Therapy program for Whispering Pines."
"Nice to meet you," Jim shook the man's hand. "I'm Jim, the father of the reluctant rider, and this lovely woman is my significant other, Heather…we're accountants."
"Nice to meet you ma'am." Ren tipped his hat a second time.
"It's my fault she doesn't like horses," Jim confessed. "I took her on a Carousel as a little girl and she fell off when I moved my hands to let her have some independence."
Ren chuckled, "Counselor Bob will tell you that placing blame is a waste of time. It's all about saddling up and moving forward, isn't that right, Ellie?"
With no enthusiasm whatsoever Ellie replied, "Yep…you gotta giddy up and get on with your life, leaving your nasty habits in the dust. Yee Haw. How was that, Cowboy? I'm smelling the BS on my boots, how about you?"
"Your daughter's a real charmer, Mr. Brass." Ren smiled and started walking away. "I'll see you at high noon tomorrow, Miss Ellie."
"Ooh, Cowboy Ren! Be still my lil' 'ol heart!" She clutched her chest and batted her eyes. "I'll be countin' the seconds!"
Wildfire Country Club
3:44 p.m.
While Tawny was talking about baby stuff with a gaggle of excited and supportive women at the club, Greg took out his cell phone and made a call. "Bro! Today's the day man and the wait is killing me and while I'm dying a slow and painful death, Tawny is driving me insane!"
"Greggo! Speaking of being driven insane…you'll never guess what I'm doing. I'm at home playing Trivial Pursuit with Hodges and I'm kicking his ass!"
"Uh…you're right, I never would have guessed that." Chuckling Greg said, "If he offers you the full David Hodges experience, take my advice and say no."
"I don't want to know what any of that means."
Glancing over his shoulder to make sure Tawny was occupied, Greg said, "Hey, can you take five and help me with some subterfuge?"
"Sure thing, Man…just give me a sec. Hodges…no cheating. Put the lids on the question boxes and I'll be watching you from the patio."
While Greg waited he watched Tawny gushing with excitement as women felt her belly and showered her with friendly advice.
"Hit it, Greggo. What do you need me to do?"
"Okay…you know how our women love to share personal information?"
"You mean like every embarrassing detail of our sex life? Yeah…painfully aware." Nick burst out laughing. "By the way…did you get to drive the peg home yet, Bro?"
"Ugh…I would have had an opportunity at a party last night if my ex-fantasy girl, Becca didn't have someone slip me GHB so she could sneak me away from Tawny and blow me while I was too out of it to know what was going on."
"Excuse me?"
"I don't really want to get into it," he groaned. "I'm fine, Tawny's cool…now that I roasted my private parts in the Jacuzzi for an hour to get rid of the Becca germs. And don't worry about work…I didn't press charges because it would have been career suicide. I got justice though…in exchange for my incriminating container of GHB urine and a vial with the perp's prints, I secured a free breast reduction for Tawny from one of the best plastic surgeons in the country."
"Uh…"
"Anyway, enough about that, here's what I want you to do…"
Nick and Carrie's Apartment
3:54 p.m.
While sipping iced tea and counseling Celeste, Carrie saw Nick enter the kitchen sporting a goofy grin. "What has you so giddy?"
Approaching Celeste with a smile, Nick said, "Would you mind giving us a couple of minutes?"
"Oh…" Celeste looked at her watch. "I'm sorry…we've overstayed."
"No…no." Nick pointed to the living room. "I'm in the middle of heated game of Trivial Pursuit with your lesser half. I don't want you to go. I just need to tell Carrie something privately."
"Oh, okay." Celeste smiled and headed out the door for the living room.
"Why didn't you ask us to play, Nicky?" Carrie huffed and gently shoved her man. "You know I love board games."
He opted not to remind that she was a real anal-retentive pain in the ass when playing board games and instead said, "It was a spontaneous challenge." Nick smiled with pride. "We made a bet on the game…if he wins I have to suck up to him for a week at work, but if I win, he has to impregnate his wife." When Carrie punched him in the shoulder he yelped, "What was that for! I said he has to impregnate his wife, not me!"
"How could you be so flippant about something as important as bringing a child into this world? The decision to have a baby is not trivial."
"Jeeeeeeez…could you give me some credit? There's a method to my madness. First off…I was testing him. He never would have agreed to the bet if he knew he could never have kids. Second…I wanted to keep him around to meet Sean and McKenna, because they helped get Grissom and Sara comfortable with the concept of having kids. Personally I can't imagine him as the father of a baby but…" He rubbed his sore muscle. "Did you forget I was shot in the arm last week?"
"Oh!" Carrie pushed up his t-shirt sleeve and planted a tender kiss on the scar. "Sorry…about hitting you and jumping to conclusions."
"Yeah…" He stared her down and then got back on track. "Anyway…I came in here excited to tell you that I just got off the phone with Greg, and he told me how he's going to pop the question tonight. It's cute and I thought you'd get a kick out of it. But now that you punched me…"
"Ooh!" Jumping up and down she pleaded, "Tell me, tell me, tell me!"
"Okay…you know how they're into that fairytale crap…" When he saw her expression morph from giddy to grouchy Nick corrected, "You know how they're into that sweet fairytale stuff…well, they're going to be at this formal dinner tonight…"
"Symbolic of the ball in Cinderella!"
"Ding ding!" He laughed at her Game Show Contestant zeal.
"Oh…I hope Greg doesn't intend to make her lose one of my Manolos in an homage to the glass slipper. Because I love those shoes and…but if he's proposing while she's wearing them, then I think it would be nice for me to give them to her as a…"
"Focusing…" He snapped his fingers. "Welcome back. Okay, Greg is going to take Tawny for a romantic walk on the club grounds and then, at precisely 11:59, he's going to propose, slip the ring on her finger and kiss her until after the stroke of midnight. When he breaks the kiss, he's going to say…it's after midnight and you're still dressed for the dance and my diamond ring hasn't turned into a marble, looks like this fairytale is here to stay…yadda, yadda, yadda…happy, happily ever after, Princess."
"Awww." Carrie's hands went to her heart as she pictured the romantic moment. "She'll love that."
"Yeah." Nick nodded while he thought, and it's a hell of a lot less humiliating than what he's really going to do. I can't believe that fool is going to sing in front of hundreds of people. "Anyway…" He rubbed his hands together. "I've got to get back to the game. Would you mind calling for some pizza? Get extra because the kids are coming over with Sara and Gris in a bit."
In a romantic haze Carrie sighed, "Sure…I'll join you in the living room as soon as I'm done on the phone."
"Great." He pecked her lips and strolled out whistling.
As soon as Nick was gone, Carrie rushed for the cordless and punched in Tawny's cell phone number. "Hey!"
"Hey, Girlfriend!" Tawny greeted in a bubbly tone.
In the corner of the kitchen Carrie anxiously whispered into the phone, "If I knew exactly when Greg was going to pop the question, would you want to know, or would you want to be surprised?"
"Oh my gosh! You know! How do you know!"
"He told Nicky!"
"Tell me, tell me, tell me!"
Wildfire Country Club
4:04 p.m.
While watching Tawny talking a mile a minute on her cell, Greg punched in Nick's cell number.
"How's it going?"
"Girl chat has commenced," Greg reported. "And…wait for it…wait for it…there we go! She just squealed with excitement."
"Dude…if she loves the idea, why not spare yourself the public spectacle and just do the midnight fairytale thing?"
Waving to his mother Greg replied, "Because my mommy would kill me if I backed out now."
"I should have guessed," he groaned. "Damn, if I wasn't laid up I'd drive out to watch you embarrass yourself."
Laughing in advance of his friend's reaction Greg said, "Don't worry…Mommy Dearest is paying someone to film it."
"I should have guessed that too." A laborious sigh followed. "Yeah…she'll be snuggling up with your childhood pal…Mr. Peebles the Ass, while munching popcorn and sobbing as she watches her little boy turn over his life to another woman."
"While the rest of it is probably true, she won't be able to snuggle with Mr. Peebles because I snatched him. I'm bringing him back to Vegas with me."
"Great…Vegas could use another Democrat, and you're going to need something to hold once Tawny gets crabby from lugging your spawn around in her gut for months."
Grissom's Car
4:15 p.m.
"Is everyone buckled up?" Sara asked in a motherly tone while looking at the three kids seated in the rear of the vehicle.
Familiar with the question from their overprotective mother, all three Blake kids gave a silent thumbs up.
"Excellent." Sara buckled herself and whispered to Gil, "It's really weird seeing three kids in the back of your car."
"I was just thinking the same thing." Gil turned the ignition and as he drove away he pensively asked, "One's plenty, right?"
"Definitely."
"I gotta go potty!" McKenna announced from her place between her brothers.
"She's lying," Ryan groaned. "She just wants to go back and get a toy or something she forgot. She pulls this all the time."
Gil and Sara exchanged tense smiles as they both envisioned a puddle of pee on the fine leather.
Nick and Carrie's Apartment
4:17 p.m.
Carrie and Celeste were sharing the brown leather love seat watching the game and falling a little harder for their men…
"Here we go…" Nick sat back grinning and pulled a card. "Sports and Leisure for a pie, Hodges."
"Let it be leisure, please let it be leisure," Hodges chanted.
"Ha! Who was the first football coach to win the Rose, Orange, Cotton and Sugar Bowls?" He glanced over at the ladies. "There's no way in hell he knows this, is there, Celeste?"
"I certainly hope not!" Celeste excitedly shouted. Nick was up four pieces of pie to her pregnancy adverse man's two. Nick had pulled her aside and filled her in on his plan to keep Hodges around until Ryan, Sean and McKenna came to see how he interacted with them.
"Pass," Hodges snipped while handing over the die.
Nick laughed. "You don't even want to guess because I keep ripping on you for those idiotic replies, huh?"
When Carrie saw her man roll a five she clapped, "Yes! You need Science and Nature, move right."
When Nick's blue game piece landed on the brown space Hodges read, "What tropical trees, infected with witches' broom and frosty pod rot, worried chocoholics in 2000?"
"Ooh!" Carrie, a big-time chocoholic, covered her mouth to stop the answer from popping out.
Celeste smiled. "That's easy."
"For a Trace Tech," Hodges clarified while staring down his opponent.
But Nick immediately and confidently replied, "The cocoa tree."
"Wait!" Carrie jumped up, cutting off Hodges before he could say the answer was wrong. In a flash she was whispering in his ear, "Let him spell it, because sometimes with the Texas accent he says things kind of funny. Maybe he's got the right answer but it doesn't sound like it to us."
"Where in the rules does it say I have to give him a chance to spell it?"
Stuffing her hands on her hips Carrie chortled, "You're challenging me about knowing the rules? His accent is a handicap and unless you're ready to face a discrimination lawsuit, you'll allow the accommodation!"
Hodges huffed in Nick's direction, "Please spell your answer."
Not understanding the confusion but loving the appearance of Kick-ass Carrie, Nick happily played along, "C-O-C-O…cocoa tree."
As Hodges burst into a fit of laughter Carrie chomped on her bottom lip. "Sorry, Honey…I was trying to help."
"What's so funny!" Nick demanded.
Hodges was more than happy to fill in the blanks. "The correct answer was Cacao Tree, which your fiancée thought you were saying with a funny Texas accent, so she wanted you to spell it, but when you did, not only did you get the answer wrong, you spelt cocoa wrong. There's an 'a' at the end of it. C-O-C-O-A. And pardon me if you disagree, but I think that's far more embarrassing not knowing that, versus the name of some obscure football coach."
"Joe Paterno is not obscure!" Nick barked back. "And you only know how to spell cocoa…because you spent all your lonely Saturday nights staring at the Swiss Miss Girl on the C-O-C-O-A box !"
"Where does chocolate milk come from, Stokes?" Hodges asked in a giddy laugh. "Ha! Admit it! Your first thought was a chocolate cow!" Then he said, "Hey, Carrie…repeat after me…silk, silk, silk."
"Silk, silk, silk."
"What does a cow drink?" Hodges prompted.
"Water."
Nick cringed. "Are we playing the game, or playing games here? I'm waiting…"
Greg's Sequoia
4:31 p.m.
Driving home from the club to get ready for the big party that night, Tawny closed her eyes and imagined the plan Carrie had shared. She could see Greg, looking so handsome in his new suit and tie, nervously strolling her down a path to a secluded spot. Then, in a very private moment, presenting the most beautiful diamond ring and slipping it on her finger as both their hands trembled. A smile crested on her face as she relaxed, grateful she wouldn't have to spend the whole night wondering when he'd propose. Now she could enjoy dinner and dancing all the while knowin, at the stroke of midnight, her fairytale would have a happy ending.
After pulling into the driveway of his parents' home, Greg glanced over and saw Tawny with her eyes closed and a giddy smile on her face. He had no doubt she was pondering the proposal ruse and was thrilled the plan had worked. Now, she wouldn't be anxious all night and when the moment arrived four hours earlier than Tawny believed it would, she'd be stunned. "I love you," Greg softly said as he gripped her hand. "In case I'm nervous later and forget to mention that, I thought I'd say it now."
Opening her eyes she dreamily replied, "At the stroke of midnight I'll be your fiancée."
"Don't you mean by the stroke of midnight?" He fought not to laugh at the slip. "Because I said between sunset and the stroke of midnight."
"Yes! I meant by the stroke of midnight." She chewed her bottom lip hoping he didn't get suspicious. "Greg…don't be nervous. What matters to me is that it's a special, intimate moment for the two of us to share and treasure for the rest of our lives. I mean…it's not like you'll be proposing in front of the entire club with a million eyes staring at you, waiting for you to blow it, and laughing at you when you very sweetly trip over your words, right? Now that would be something to give you an ulcer." Leaning over she brushed his cheek with a tender kiss. "Awww…you know I love you, Greg …and you already know my answer. So, what's there to be nervous about?"
"Uh…" While terror seized him, Greg choked out, "Right…nothing…nothing to fear at all." Except for the freakin' nightmare you just planted in my head! Oh my God! What was I thinking! "Princess…I'm uh…going to walk you to the door then head back out for a few supplies for tonight." With a trembling hand he opened the car door and walked around to meet her.
"Ooh…romantic supplies I hope. Flowers?"
As his stomach churned Greg forced a smile and began a mental shopping list. Antacid…heavy duty deodorant...
"Chocolate?"
As Tawny continued to swoon, Greg's shopping list became a packing list. Maximum strength aspirin...a magician's box so I can disappear after I make a fool of myself and you're too embarrassed to say yes…
"Faux champagne and strawberries?"
A fake mustache…dark sunglasses…a ball cap…a bus ticket to Mexico...anti-diarrhea medicine…cash…a new identity…Mr. Peebles, so I'm not alone for the rest of my life…
Author's Notes:
Nicky's home and Carrie is spoiling her man and most importantly…making him SHAVE! Ahhh the beauty of Fanfiction…you can make the characters do what you want.
Sean's Biblical lesson from Grissom is timely considering Mike Rodgers just became an ordained minister thanks to a $400 correspondence study course (Yes, believe it or not that is possible…I verified it on the Internet and with my official prison resource EyerishEyes).
Greg fulfilled another fantasy…public sunscreen application by a babe.
Fancy ferret pictures, Hodges and Nick locked in a board game battle, and more country club/proposal chaos to round out the chappie and ramp up the levity.
I hope you enjoyed it!
Thanks for your reviews: Misty-J, Southern CSI lover and El Gringo Loco! Always appreciated!
Next Chapter: The Trivial Pursuit showdown continues…the Grissoms bring Sean, Ryan and McKenna to Nick & Carrie's and stick around for the fun…and "Come What May" - it's proposal time! Posting: Wedensday morning
Thanks for reading,
Maggs