The rays of powerful heat beat down on my body, wave after unending wave, like a tide on the shore of a beach. The light immersed everything; nothing could escape it. My mouth was dry; the air sapped of all moisture, the sea all around me itself was almost boiling. High above me was the cause of all the unease, the bright orb of light that we called the sun. At that point in time, it wasn't the heavy gravity I was under that was my main enemy, it was that sphere, millions of kilometres away from me.
Still, there was no other place I wanted to be. The sun was a good thing; its presence meant that it was daytime, that the darkness of night would not rear its ugly head. The night time was the only thing I feared anymore, it housed nothing but evil and hate.
So I trained hard during the daytime, and during the night, I slept. Sleep was my only refuge from the night, it let me block out the insanity. I didn't even have dreams to remind me of my last night awake on my island. I used to have dreams, long ago, but now that I was Phoenix, I didn't have them any more, probably part of the Saiyan mind.
So being a Saiyan did have perks after all, that much was true, but so far being a member of the species had done little for me, other than cause pain and anguish. After all, I hadn't chosen to be a Saiyan, it kind of chose me. If I had to do it all over again, I probably would've chosen to die on that piece of rock that used to be planet Vegeta.
The powers bestowed upon me so long ago felt like nothing but a burden, a weight upon my shoulders that could break me at will. I was scared of that weight breaking me, of sending me in another rage of source less anger and destruction, like that night with Cris.
I was genuinely scared of my power, of its ability to bend my will to do it's bidding, almost like it had control over me, instead of visa-versa. This was the reason that I wasn't trying my absolute hardest to increase my strength; I was worried my power would eventually exceed my ability to control.
So while all my friends went all out in their bids to become more powerful, I lagged behind, scared of my own power. It was almost funny… I was supposed to be the last remaining Saiyan, the pinnacle of pride and fighting spirit, and here I was, afraid that my power might hurt someone.
I knew I couldn't lag too far behind, or else I'd be the weak link when the Caprians arrived. I mentally knew that Cris would be back eventually, that we'd talk it over, and make up for what I did, but somewhere deeper within me, I couldn't forgive myself for what I'd done to him. In only four months we'd become best friends, just to have me kill him off. I couldn't excuse myself for that, and I'd made a vow never to let that happen to a friend of mine again.
I shook my head. I knew I had to stop thinking about Cris, it would only screw me up in the end, and I didn't have time for that. I looked out over the vast expanse of the island I was beginning to call a home, and restarted my training.
I turned to face a large boulder-like rock off to my right, bent my legs slightly, and then quickly zanzokened. When I reappeared, I was right in front of the rock, with my right hand curled into a tight fist by my side. I struck the rock with all my might, causing it to shatter straight down its axis, before eventually breaking in several directions. Splinters of red-brown rock flew all around my head and body, but I didn't have time to stand idly and watch the destruction. I zanzokened again, this time to a large, bridge like rock behind me and to my left.
I again swung and devastated the rock face, this time causing the small mountain-like rock to crumble to the ground. Before the first pieces were falling though, I had zanzokened to another rock about half the size of me. This time I quickly brought up my right leg and then swept it down at full force into the torso of the rock. It split straight down the middle, sending pieces of rock flying on both sides of my feet.
Again I zanzokened right after striking, reappearing beside a high rock, and driving my elbow deep into it's hard surface. I continued zanzokening around the small island, until I had broken, shattered, or otherwise demolished every piece of rock within the heavy gravity zone. It took nearly five minutes to lay waste to the landscape, but it proved to be worth it; I was winded and gasping for air at the end, always a good sign when training.
I felt like taking a break, but I knew that wouldn't help me in the long run, it'd just allow time for memories, bad memories, to surface again. Instead I quickly flew over to the gravity machine to see how it was doing.
The gravity device itself was simply a small (two feet high) oval like metallic object with a bunch of switches and control pads on the sides. It's silvery siding reflecting brightly, especially under the bright light of the sun, and whenever it was in use, it hummed slightly.
I dropped right next to the machine, and bent down to it. The small liquid display screen on the right side of the device read "10", which was what I'd set it at. In a few days, I'd have to up it to about 20 times normal gravity to continue the training. It'd been less than two weeks since we'd all begun our gravity training, and I knew the likes of Gideon and Karnai had probably already increased the gravity level. I didn't mind, I'd rather take it nice and slowly, after all, it didn't matter how fast we progressed, just as long as we did progress.
After I was done checking the gravity level, I moved onto the field width. The gravity device had originally been made to encompass the size of a small Capsule Corp. pod, such as the one Goku and Vegeta used to train for the androids so many years ago. Since then though, Capsule Corp. had derived how to control the field, and make it expand over anywhere from 10 metres to a few kilometres. The generators we were using were the latest models, able to create a circle of gravity 10 kilometres in diameter. I'd set the field to only 6 kilometres, so any birds or other animals wouldn't accidentally be crushed under the gravity field. I'd been using part of my ki to ward away the animals when I had the gravity field activated, but at 10 kilometres it was nearly impossible to direct every single one of them away. Already all the plant, grass and insect life within my field was crushed and dead, so when I left the training spot, there'd be a patch of dead land waiting to be renewed.
The gravity field was still at the right size, so I stood up, turned towards the ocean and flew over to the coast. I plopped down on the small beachhead, and dropped down into my fighting stance. I took a few seconds, closed my eyes, letting my ears take in the sounds of the rolling ocean, and then proceeded to practice my basic attacks.
I started with my punches and kicks, proceeding onto my close combat throws, holds, elbows and knees, before going onto my small and medium sized ki blast attacks. When it came time to use the energy attacks, I directed them all into the sea, controlling their course beyond the gravity field and into the ocean. I must've fired a few hundred blasts before I began to grow tired. Still, I continued on, throwing wave after wave of the ki flashes mercilessly into the water in front of me.
When I finally gave up, almost all my energy had been expended, and I sunk to the ground, gasping for air. I looked up into the sky, and saw the sun had changed positions since I last stared into it. It was now beginning to descend away from me, beginning to allow the darkness to cover the sky.
I continued to take in deep breaths, just staring out into the ocean. I hit some sort of a trance; my breathing slowed, my eyes remained fixated on nothing in particular, and my mind began to wander. It was kind of like meditation, except for the fact I lost all control of my mind, like it was separated from my soul and body. It drifted over my memories of that last night, but luckily didn't remain fixated on them. Instead it concentrated on one thing, like an epicentre of thought within my memory.
Before me hung the moon, glowing dimly, seemingly resting on the surface of the ocean in front of my eyes. Now if I'd had control of my own mind, I probably would've realized that the moon had been destroyed, and that I must've been seeing things. However, my mind had a thought of its own.
I stared at the fake moon. For how long, I don't know. I remember seeing the sun slowly moving down in the corner of my eye. After a while, the moon seemed to get brighter and brighter, almost like it was moving towards me.
Soon the light was blinding, but I continued to stare straight into it. Then suddenly, an epiphany. A moment of clarity unlike anything I'd ever felt or heard of before. I slowly brought my hand up, still staring at the moon straight ahead of me. I opened my palm upwards, curved my fingers up like I was holding a large ball in my hands, and then began to send my ki energy into it.
Soon a small ball of energy sprung up from my palm. I didn't look at it, didn't even really notice it, I still stared straight into the moon. Slowly, oh so slowly, the moon began to move. It drifted slowly, moving towards my outstretched hand. It came closer and closer, seemingly taking an eternity, before it reached my hand. Then the moon began to disappear, replaced by a light very, very similar to its own.
Eventually the moon was gone, and in its place was the ball of energy I had created. It seemed familiar, almost like I'd seen it before. Then I realized, I had. It was the moon, or something very similar to it, and I had created it.
I gazed into the ball of light, bore into it with my pupils. As I did so, the hair on my arms began to rise, the fur on my tail began to prick up, and I began to sense my power rising. The realization that I held a miniature moon in my palm struck me, and I quickly crushed it with my hand.
Immediately my hairs fell back into place, my power level fell back down, and I fell into a heap in the sand. I laid on my back for a good long while, trying to understand what I had done, but failing for the longest time. A wave of weakness and tiredness I'd rarely felt before came upon me, and I began to nod off to sleep.
I tried weakly to keep my eyes open, but failed terribly. I laid in the sand with my eyes closed, not knowing if I would wake up.