Chapter 7. I'm rather proud of myself on this one. Updates are consistent and regular, I haven't lost my muse, and normally once I make it past the first few chapters I'm good for the rest of the story because I'm so involved with the characters that it just hurts to think about not writing, and I'll be sitting in class, like this morning in Comparative Studies, thinking about what songs Jess should play at the Prom he made for Rory. By the way, I have an absolutely perfect one to use, just so you know. I know I don't normally do songfics, and this won't be one per se, but there will be lyrics in this, and I'll go ahead and tell you that they are by Nickelback and the song Far Away off their new album. For all those of you who haven't heard the song, prepare to cry. It is so perfect.
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The gymnasium was lit softly with ivory Christmas tree lights, and off to one side there was a small table, set for two people. The tablecloth was red, and there was a bottle of sparkling cider chilling in a bucket of ice.
"Jess." That was the one word that could force itself from Rory's throat at that moment. She was too overcome to say anything else. She looked at him with eyes wet with tears and alight with joy. "Thank you."
"You deserve it. Come on, I cooked."
"You cooked?"
"I did. At Luke's. It isn't cheeseburgers, but you should like it. How do you feel about Italian?"
"I love Italian. Pizza's Italian. How could I not like Italian? And spaghetti, everyone likes spaghetti. Well, except Mom, but she won't eat anything made with any part of a vegetable."
"Rory. You're rambling again."
"I'm nervous."
"I'm the one sticking my neck out here." He reminded her gently, leading her to the table, and pulling out her chair for her. "All you have to do is sit here and enjoy dinner. Which is lasagna by the way. I decided to skip the salad because I know you'd never eat it and go straight for the main course. Dessert is, of course, something coffee and chocolate flavored."
Rory's head bobbed up and down. "You certainly do know me well."
"Your coffee addiction is well known, Ror. Everyone in the state of Connecticut knows not to deny a Gilmore a cup of coffee."
She smiled as he placed her plate in front of her. "Thanks. This looks wonderful." She picked up her fork, started to take a bite, then changed her mind. "Why the clues?"
"Excuse me?"
"The scavenger hunt. Sending me all over town finding those envelopes taped to things. Some of your references were really out there. Like the Fountainhead. Plays on titles of books are unacceptable. It took me a while."
"I was in a hurry and didn't have time to be clever. You obviously figured them all out though. Seeing as you're here a little earlier than I'd figured you'd be."
"Mom said I had to hurry because I was running late. And Luke just told me what was going on. He didn't make me follow a lot of clues all over town. Though it was a good idea. Maybe in six months, when Mom comes to see the baby, I'll hide her and send Mom on a scavenger hunt."
Jess could see that one in his head, and it wasn't pretty. "I don't think I'd do that if I were you. She may deem it cruel and unusual and just take the baby back to Stars Hollow."
"True." Rory finally took a bite of the lasagna. "Ooh. This is really good."
"I'm glad you approve. I am Italian, Rory."
"I know. You've just never cooked for me before. This is much better than Olive Garden."
"I should hope so."
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Dinner went smoothly. By the time he cleared the dessert plates, he had her relaxed and laughing. But he didn't sit down after placing the dishes out of sight. He walked to a CD player that he'd set up earlier and put in the CD he'd made of all the songs he wanted to play that night. There were actually three different discs, and four hours of music waiting to be played. He didn't think he'd need that much, but he'd wanted to be prepared.
Rory grinned when Road to Ruin blasted from the speakers. She stood and hopped on one foot to take off the evil high heels. Besides, with them on, she was nearly eye to eye with him, and for some reason she liked being short around him. She always wanted him to tower over her.
"What else is on there?"
"Oh, Nirvana, Metallica, a little Journey, the Ramones, the Clash, Coheed and Cambria, Bon Jovi, Green Day, Breaking Benjamin, Staind, No Address, and Nickelback."
Rory lifted her eyebrows. "Wide selection there."
"That was the plan. Didn't want to stick with one theme. Seemed a little boring."
"A little. But we've never been predictable. It would have been a change."
"Yes, but our unpredictability is predictable. The one thing people know for sure is that they never know what we're going to do next."
"When you put it that way…we're already a boring old married couple."
Jess pulled her into his arms. "Might as well split up now. That's a little unpredictable even for us. We never managed to have a traditional breakup like all other couples. We'll be predictable, and normal, and that will be us being unpredictable."
"You're right. I love you, but people just know too much about us. We can't possibly be together anymore if it's lost it's shock value."
"Really, I mean, come on, Ror, you're pregnant. That sort of shocked them beyond any shock they could ever have ever again. No one's talking about us anymore."
"The horror." She rested her head against his chest, breathed in his scent. "Jess?"
"Hmm?"
"I like being predictably unpredictable."
"Me too. So I guess the split is off, huh?"
"It would seem so. Too bad. That would have set the town on it's ear."
"I know. We'll just have to come up with something else."
She smiled again his tuxedo. "Once Mom gets through alerting everyone in town to your impromptu prom, that'll turn everything upside down. They'll have to reevaluate what they think about you."
"Well then, my mission in life has been fulfilled." He kissed the top of her head, tightening his grip on her waist. "Why are we slowdancing to a fast song?"
Rory realized that Enter Sandman was playing and chuckled. "Because neither of us really fast dance well. You pretend that you're too cool, and I look like an idiot when I try."
"You don't look like an idiot ever, but I am too cool. You can be too cool if you want."
"I want to be whatever you are."
"Good. Cause I want the same thing."
They fell silent and simply danced. Holding each other, occasionally making a comment about the song that was playing, stopping once to get a drink of water and chase each other around the gym for a few minutes, flicking one another with drops of water from their glasses. But when the final song on the CD came on, he drew her back into his arms, but didn't let her lay her head on his chest.
"Look at me for this one."
Not understanding, Rory nodded. And an unfamiliar song came on. After the first verse, she was crying.
This time, this placeMisused, Mistakes
Too long, too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know
"Jess."
He wiped the tears from her face with the tips of his fingers. "Just listen, Ror. Please."
That I love youI have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
And you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore
"I love you, Rory." He kissed her softly. "I wish I hadn't ever left. And I wish I'd come back much sooner. I know we needed the time, but we missed so much."
"I know. I wanted you to come back. Every day, I wanted you here with me. I always have. I always will."
On my knees, I'll askLast chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything, but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know
"I wanted to take you to Prom all those years ago."
"I know." Rory smiled gently. "It's okay, Jess. I forgave you for that a long time ago. I'm just glad you're here now."
"I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving you ever again. I mean, we're talkin' serious, till death do us part stuff here, Ror. Cause when I'm in, I'm all in. And you can't get rid of me."
"Good. Cause I'm all in, too. And I don't want to get rid of you."
"Thank God."
That I love youI have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
And you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore
So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know
I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving
Hold on to me
And never let me go
Rory laid her head against his shoulder and fisted her hands in his coat. And she cried. And he held her, and let her hold onto him. And he prayed fervently that nothing would ever come between them again. And hoped against hope that they would be strong enough to handle whatever came at them when the prayer wasn't answered. And he cried with her.
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Jess dropped Rory off at her house a little after midnight. He kissed her, long and slow and deep, then sent her inside to her mother, who was eagerly awaiting the details of the night. He grinned however, when he heard Lorelai's first shriek.
"Oh my God, Rory! You're crying! What did the jackass do? I swear I'll kill him!"
Rory shook her head and walked into her mother's arms. "Mom, it was so sweet. He was so amazing."
"Oh. So good tears?"
"Very good tears. Mom, it was the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me. He made dinner, and we danced, and he made a CD, and he held me. And we didn't even have to talk. We just stood there, holding each other, and he cried, Mom."
Lorelai had to sit down. She motioned for Rory to follow her and sank onto the couch. "Jess 'I'm a tough guy' Mariano cried?"
"He did. I cried first though. Mom, nothing will ever compare to what he did tonight. Nothing."
Lorelai pulled Rory into her arms and they curled up on the couch to talk like they had countless times in the past. "Ror, baby, that's amazing. I'm so glad you had fun."
"I love him, Mom, and I'll never not love him."
"I know." Lorelai sighed, kissed Rory's hair. "You've loved him since you were seventeen. That's saying something, seeing as what you put each other through."
"He came back for me."
"What do you mean?"
"During the whole Dean thing. He came back for me. After Liz's wedding. He came to my dorm at Yale, and begged me to go with him and live with him so that we could be together. And I slammed the door in his face, Mom."
"Oh, baby. Why didn't you tell me?"
"You'd have thought he deserved it, and I knew he didn't. I knew that I really wanted to go with him, but I held myself back. It should have been him, Mom. Not Dean. I shouldn't have slept with Dean. Jess should have been my first. I mean, you know I never even thought about it with Dean, and I told you that it might happen with Jess."
"I remember. I hated him then, Ror. It felt like he was stealing my baby. And then everything happened with Dean being married, and Logan, and I wished Jess was back, and that all I had to deal with was worrying about him gnomenapping Babette's lawn ornaments."
"You never told me that."
"You were growing up, and we were drifting apart. I didn't want to drive anything else between us. I'm glad he's back, Rory. And I'm glad that you're with him."
"So am I."
"And that's what matters. I'll miss you, babe. While you're in New York. I'll miss you a lot."
"And I'll miss you too. But we'll come visit, and you'll come visit, and we'll talk three times every day, and we'll see each other on weekends, and email, and even snail mail. And I'll send you a fruit basket to torture Luke with every week."
"And I'll send you coffee flavored everything so that you can get your fix without huge amounts of caffeine. And I'll get a webcam so we can talk on the Internet and see each other, and we'll download those annoying instant message things."
"Definitely. Mom?"
"Yeah, babe?"
"Can we stay out here tonight? Just the two of us?"
"Sure, honey. Let's have a girls night."
"Can I pretend I'm seventeen and you like Jess?"
"Sure. Let's pretend you're seventeen and I like Jess. How was school?"
"Well, Mom, Chilton is really tough…but I think I might make valedictorian."
Lorelai grinned as she reached for the remote. "That's nice, Ror. And guess what? Reruns of I love Lucy are on."
"Ooh. Let's watch."
Lorelai turned on the TV and mother and daughter settled in to watch an old classic. Both hanging on to the pretend world when things were simpler, and easier to deal with. And facing the moment they would have to again face reality with a mixture of hope, and dread.