January

Sirius was acting weird – so was Remus. James couldn't put his finger on exactly how they were acting weird, but something weird was definitely going on. He'd caught Sirius just staring off into space thinking – since when did Sirius think? Oh, when he confronted him about it Sirius just said he was thinking of this map he'd had ideas for, and it did sound pretty cool, but James got the impression that there was more to it. On the other hand Remus had got all bold. Between the four of them he was just the same, but when Snape had made some crack about Sirius, Remus had snuck up behind him and hexed him so he grew boils all over his ass. It was funny as hell watching Snape trying to sit all through History of Magic and even better that he didn't even know Remus had done it, but it was so unlike Remus: he was supposed to be the one keeping them in line. When James had tried to ask Lily what she thought about it she had just smiled strangely and then said that if he couldn't guess it just proved he was a boy. He couldn't be too mad at her since she kissed him before she left, but still it annoyed the hell out of him! Luckily Peter wasn't any the wiser either, though James doubted he'd even noticed anything weird till it had been mentioned to him.

Now it was the night of the full moon and they were acting even weirder. Neither one would say anything without being prompted in the walk down the tunnel to the Shack, but James was thinking about other things. The last of Remus' transformations he had seen had scared the shit out of him and he wasn't looking forward to this one. Pete looked pale as they waited for the sun to set, as if he were thinking the same thing, but Sirius seemed as lost in thought as he had been for days. When the change finally came James was amazed at how easily Remus seemed to slip into his new form: he still whimpered and howled a bit but it didn't seem that bad at all. As soon as it was over Remus rubbed his muzzle along Sirius' in doggy greeting then gently touched noses with the other two as well.

That night everyone seemed subdued, they played a little and did the things they normally did, but no one really seemed in the mood for fun and frolics. Remus seemed distressed, pacing restlessly around the house as if looking for something, but not finding it. Sirius stayed out of the way mostly, watching Remus carefully and James began to think that they'd had an argument about something, but he was glad enough when the night was finally over. Remus bounded into his comfy room, Sirius racing after him. The change started and James moved forward to try and brace one of his arms at least with his antlers, that was until Sirius growled at him. Sirius had never growled at him before so fiercely and he stepped back as much in surprise as in acquiescing to him. Pete huddled in the corner in fear, but, like the change to wolf, the change back was surprisingly smooth and soon enough Sirius was wrapping him in a blanket and letting James help lay him down on the mattress. Once they were sure he was asleep and unhurt James looked at his watch.

"Shit! Come on guys we better get going or we're going to be late." James started to move off, but noticed Sirius wasn't following. "Come on Sirius! We gotta go and unless you want to try getting out of here without the cloak then you better hurry."

"Yeah coming," Sirius mumbled, but he was looking at Remus.

Sirius' sheets hated him. It was the only explanation he had left. They hated him and were determined to make him freeze. No matter how many blankets he badgered out of the house elves or how much he sweated under their weight he still felt cold. At first he had wondered whether he was coming down with something, but after a long month with no other symptoms he's decided it probably wasn't that: he just didn't know what it was.

It was two nights after the full moon and bright silver light still streamed in through a gap in the curtains when he finally gave in at two in the morning and got up to go and read for a bit in the common room. Slipping a pair of socks on to protect him from the cold stone stairs, he sneaked quietly out of the dorm room he shared with his four best friends only to find one of them had beaten him to it.

Remus was sat in front of the fire in the common room and greeted him with a casual "Can't sleep?" as he came down the stairs.

"Yeah. I don't know what it is but I've been barely able to sleep for ages now."

"Ah well, I can never sleep that well at night this close to a moon. How do you think I get all my homework done so quickly?"

Sirius tried to match Remus smile, but was afraid he fell short. He'd felt so odd recently around Remus. He was the fire; so bright and warming he felt drawn towards him, but beaten back by the brilliance when he got to close.

Suddenly Remus yawned and Sirius felt cheated to have so little time to bask in his presence, though he had already run out of things to say. He almost sighed in relief when Remus settled down, curled like a dog, in front of the fire.

"I don't want to wake the guys twice. Wake me when you go back up and I'll come with you."

Sirius managed to mumble out a "sure Ok," before Remus closed his eyes and sighed in contented sleep. Watching him lying there, the glow of the fire turning the sleeping figure's skin to gold Sirius felt warmer than he had in a long time. Drowsiness suddenly washed over him, too powerful to ignore and he lay down for a moment next to his friend on the rug in front of the fire. Sleep clouding his thoughts Sirius looked at the sleeping figure, so beautiful in the dancing light, so strong and wise and caring, he felt his heart swell and wondered what he had done to have such a truly magnificent person in his life.

He wasn't sure at what point in the night Remus had rolled over to face him. Neither was he sure exactly when he had thrown an arm around the other boy, but he woke to find, Remus' still sleeping forehead pressed gently against his, his arm pulling them close so their bodies touched, fitting together like two pieces of a puzzle. His first thought shot up his spine in a decidedly un-platonic fashion, making him gasp. At the sound Remus sleepily opened his eyes, pulling his head back just enough so they could look at each other without their eyes crossing. For a second the tableau froze as they considered each other and Sirius was sure that if Remus were to pull away his world would shatter. Instead he merely lifted on eyebrow and smiled, the sincere warmth making a dopey grin spring to Sirius own face. Sighing contently Remus wrapped his own arm round Sirius' waist and snuggle in closer again.

For a moment Sirius actually thought he might throw up at the sheer joy he felt. He had no idea anyone could be this accepting of him, or that he had wanted it so badly. He felt like giggling, like shouting, like staying like this forever, but he settled for kissing the top of Remus' head, smelling his shampoo and the smell that his doggy senses had told him was the heady scent of the werewolf known as Remus. Remus pulled away just enough to look at him and smiled a smile so beautiful Sirius had to have it. He leaned in the tiny distance and covered those beautiful lips with his own, feeling Remus tense at first then respond hungrily, his hot tongue invading Sirius' mouth and making him melt. His hands seemed to have a mind of their own, tentatively exploring the other boy's sinewy frame, stroking a hip, his back and finally rising to caress the hair at the nape of his neck. Remus moaned so softly Sirius could barely hear it, but he felt the vibration against his lips like lava and pressed himself even closer while Remus cupped his jaw and clutched at his chest with a hand trapped tightly between them.

Suddenly they heard a gasp and a series of thumps, and with it the real world came crashing back down. The broke apart, gazing at each other for a moment in communion before sitting up and looking towards the stairs.

James was sat at the bottom of the stairs, wide-eyed in shock. He didn't seem to be angry, but Sirius wasn't sure what to expect. James' family were pretty traditional, but as he desperately searched his mind for some clue of what his best friend might think he realised he just didn't know what to do.

Remus did. "James? Are you alright?"

For a moment he looked confused as if sound shouldn't exist in this new world, then he tentatively stood. "I think I broke my ass sliding down the stairs."

The silence only held for a moment after that before they all collapsed laughing, erupting again when James tried to sit with them on the rug, only to jump up with a squeal and sit on the nice soft sofa.

When the laughter finally died down Sirius felt better. "Seriously mate, are you alright with this?"

He suspected James would have rather have forgotten about it altogether as he sat in thought for a moment.

"I don't know." He sighed in exasperation. "I'm sorry guys. I think I will be but this is kind of a shock you know. I mean…two guys…" he grimaced, "it's weird, you know?" He paused, debating whether to continue. "How long have…you know?"

"We haven't," Remus answered, "I mean, apart from tonight. I mean we slept together last full moon after I changed back, but just slept honestly and then things got weird and then-"

"Ok I don't need to know the details!" James put up a hand to stop him. Silence reigned.

Sirius looked at James. "We still friends?"

James goggled. "What! Of course! I mean you're still you right, and I know I'm still me so why wouldn't I be?"

Sirius laughed at the shear joy of it all, giggling all the more as Remus threw his arms round him, and James groaned in embarrassment. Just for that Sirius dived for James, planting tiny kisses all over him until he started laughing too, squealing that it wasn't fair to tease a guy with a broken ass.

When they finally stood to go get ready for breakfast Sirius pulled Remus aside and let James go on ahead.

"Sleep with me tonight."

"You couldn't stop me." Remus smiled and kissed him before racing up the stairs to beat him to the shower.

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