Well well well! Look who finally decide to write something!

I don't know what's been up with me lately. I have the idea, the plot, the entire thing laid out but my brain is DOA. That, and someone said Tommy was out of character in the last chapter and it kinda toyed with me. But yeah... I'm back and I have some killer stuff I hope to get out.

As always, thanks for the comments.

And watch for the one shot I'm going to be writing soon called "Hands Clean". (Find those lyrics for a "preview".) I think it will be thoroughly entertaining.

Here's to it!

(Post note: Yes, it's short. For a reason.)

Chapter 12 / Fight Four

Pt 1: Ill-Received

"Jude! Wait!" Jude was livid. She saw red, indigo, orange, black, and every color ever possibly seen. What she'd just witnessed shocked her more than it pissed her off. Tommy? Her Tommy? No, that wasn't possible. Fine. No more contact. She tried to reason with herself and figure out what had happened. The only thing she could conclude was that he'd given up. That no more than 72 hours had passed and the pressure had gotten to him already. He's a beautiful liar. "Jude!" His voice just fuelled her inner fire. She whirled around, stopping mid-sidewalk, causing him to run into her.

"What?" The venom in her voice was hard to suppress. Even she could feel the acid burning her lips. He grabbed her biceps firmly, holding her in her spot. Her body went rigid to his touch.

"You have to let me explain." The expression on his face was almost unreadable but she stared into his eyes, through his eyes, and saw something she was far too familiar with. Remorse. It was the same look she'd seen on her 16th birthday, when he'd returned from his trip to Europe with Sadie, and damn near every time he said something he knew he shouldn't. It infuriated her further.

"What is there to explain?" Her voice was icy and flat. She tried to free herself from his ever tightening grasp. "Do you even remember promising me you'd stick by my side? That you wouldn't leave me hanging out to dry? 'Never again' is what you said. You must have really meant 'At least not until the end of the week'."

"It isn't like that." Jude finally managed to wriggle herself from his guitar-callused hands. She looked him over, trying to gain some insight on what he was thinking.

"Then what? I'm getting really sick of this. Just... just..." Her heart told her to cry, told her to breakdown. Her fury told her to kill. Jude closed to eyes to her thoughts. "Take everything back, Tommy. Please. Take everything back and it will so much easier. I'll go back to being the admiring kid and you can be the apathetic producer. I can handle that a lot better than I can handle any of this, but please tell me why before you go and it'll be done."

"I had to say it, Jude. You know that." She turned her back to his voice, crossing her arms over her chest protectively. She felt the tears welling up in her eyes. She blinked hard, trying her best to bite them back. "You said it yourself, about Sadie. It's all about what she thinks. If she thinks we aren't seeing each other, then we aren't. Jude..." He reached out for her shoulder, the pleading undercurrent in his voice breaking her even more. She shrugged off his hand as it lightly brushed the side of her hair.

"You always do this, though. You screw up and think you can fix things by explaining them away." Her arms dropped to her sides limply. "I'm not sure I can do this anymore." Tommy stepped in closely, wrapping his arms around her, bowing his head to the back of her neck. His warm breath on her skin sent a shiver down her spine.

"I hate hurting you. I'm not going to leave; I don't want to. I love you too much to..."

"Don't say things you don't mean just to get me to shut up, Tommy."

"I couldn't lie about this. You have to believe me." She wanted to believe him. She wanted to turn around and hug him and let him off the hook, but she couldn't get past the dull ache pulsating in her chest.

"I don't know what to believe any more." She relaxed slightly, her back pushing harder against his chest. His warmth did little to settle the chill gripping onto her body. "I know you'll hurt me again. Hell, you know you'll hurt me again and that itself hurts. Maybe... maybe we should just stop while we're ahead."

"Is that what you really want?"

"What I really want is something I'm not sure you can give me and... that scares me." She stepped away from his embrace, running her hands thru her hair. "Let's just go to the studio. We'll talk later." She walked away slowly, the weight of everything teetering on her shoulders, daring her to fall.