This chapter has been BEGGING me to write it and so... I must. (Otherwise, it's threatened to find a way to block IS from me. EVIL chapter...)

The hiatus is lifted... sort of. We'll just have to see what happens.

Both Verse & Point and Stockholm Syndrome should be updated by Tuesday. (Hopefully...)

Chapter 18 / Winterization Out of Sight

They'd escaped to the "Island" sometime that afternoon, giving Kwest explicit instructions to tell whoever asked for them that Jude had left and Tommy went out as well just not together. It was comfortable there; no one went into Studio A unless it was to "audition" prospective artists or to tie up loose ends on an album. They were safe from prying eyes and probing accusations when they were in her hideaway.

"I like it in here. It's like... we're normal." They sat on the carpeting once again, sprawled out on one another. Tommy laughed heartily.

"We are normal, girl. At least, I am." He ducks back, dodging her hand before she can hit him.

"Yeah yeah... you're about as normal as you can be given..." She bites her lip and looks away, smiling.

"Given what?" He eyes her suspiciously, grabbing her and pulling her onto his lap. She giggles, trying to push him off. "Tell me!"

"That you're a boy-bander." He lets her go, holding his chest in mock-pain.

"I'm deeply offended by that."

"Aww, poor Tommy Q." She smiled in her pseudo-concern but stayed in his lap, lying against him. It was comfortable and she did indeed feel normal. It was short lived though, the voices mocking her in her happiness. Tell him, Jude. Tell him you told your father. "Shut up," she whispered under her breath. Laughter broke out in her head.

"What?" Her eyes shot up to Tommy defensively.

"Huh? Nothing. What?" His brow crinkled in questioning.

"You said, 'shut up.' Who were you talking to?"

"No one," she shot back. Her face melted into dreadful resolve. "I told."

"Told? Told what?" His demeanor was quickly changing into a state of quiet agitation. He moved her from on top of him, turning to face her. "What did you tell, Jude?"

"About us. I told my father." She looked away from his gaze, waiting for him to explode. She peeked from the corner of her eye and he wore his trademarked mask of shock. Her blood ran cold, a familiar chill and darkness overtaking her. "Let me explain though... He's cool with it. He says he supports us and that he doesn't care."

He'd ages ago given up his spot next to Jude, standing bent over the sound board.

"How could you? You... of all ppl." He raked his hands through his hair. "You know what your mother's doing and you go and tell your father? Jude, what the hell were you thinking?"

Anxiety coursed through every nerve and synapse of her body. She felt like she was on fire, that every ounce of strength and will to speak was drained from her at that moment. The laughter in her head turned into a hissing silence, a choral effort of the lot of 'them' to taunt her, tease her, and drive her to the points she's long since given up going to. What the hell have you done, Jude? She bit back her mental attacks bitterly.

"He's not going to betray me... us. He promised me. It's ok. Nothing bad will happen." The ground shook beneath her, dizziness taking hold of her footing as she began to get up. The warm place she'd just been was gone. Things were spinning too fast. Things were moving far beyond her comprehension. "He has our backs on this, Tommy."

"I can't believe you." Tommy looked over at her, horror filling ever line of his face. His hands shook against the knobs he turned nervously. "Don't you get it? This will ruin us. This will end us."

"No... it won't. I promise."

"You can't promise that," he bit back, staring at her furiously. He backed away from the panel and moved towards the door, never taking his eyes off Jude.

She knew what he was doing.

"Tommy, NO." She nearly ran to him, but everything was too much. She stood in the middle of the studio, desperation causing her to tremble. "Don't go."

"Just... let me get some air." Tommy reached for the door knob.

"Don't... please. Tommy. Tommy! Tommy..."

"I just need to think this through, ok Jude?" He nodded his head in agreement but didn't wait on her answer before he left. She saw his shadow disappear out of the side door, everything disintegrating around her. She fell to her knees, sobs pinning her face to the floor. He was gone. She's pushed him away. She's broken everything that was ok.

Never in her life had she felt so hopeless. She knew what it meant when he "went for air". He was going to rethink them. He was going to change his mind. He was going to pretend it never happened. The thought stopped her tears, a small laugh entering the picture. She couldn't help but feel somewhat amused by the way she was able to fuck up her life.

She rocked herself back and forth, wanting everything to stop. There was no god to help her now. She was alone. She was done. He was done with her. A sleepy hollowness filled her body with a lethargic murmur of dread.

If it's over... so am I. They will never know I'm gone. I'll go. I'll disappear. I'll run. Does he still love me? Are we still it? I don't want this... I never wanted any of this... Why... Why...

Tommy drove around aimlessly, thoughts pouring from everywhere. He couldn't escape his internal battle of words. He couldn't stop screaming at himself.

That was stupid, Quincy. You shouldn't have walked out like that. Now she thinks you hate her.

But I had to go. I was already saying stupid shit... I couldn't say anymore. Oh god... The look on her face... I'm going to hell for this one day.

Maybe you're already in hell.

No, I'm not. I lost my cool. I ran though. I just walked out. Dammit, my phone! It's her. I can't talk to her right now. Why'd she have to tell her dad? Why couldn't she just keep quiet?

But maybe she's right, Tom. Maybe he will be on your side.

Like that will happen. It's her 16th all over again. I'm keeping this so under wraps. It's killing me. It's killing us. I can't do this anymore. I love her. I fucking love her and it means something. God, will she please quit calling right now? I'll talk to her later. I'll tell her it's ok and that I'm sorry. I'll tell her that I want to go public.

Is that the safe thing? The wise thing? Especially with Victoria. And Sadie. Kwest, Georgia, all of Toronto?

It is! It's the RIGHT thing! This is what I want. This is what she wants. I have to find Mr. Harrison. I have to talk to him. Smooth things out.

You need to call Jude.

I will. Shut up! I'll talk to her. She thinks I'm leaving her. I'm not leaving her. I'd never do that. I never want to. I'll fix this. I'll say I'm sorry and...

And it'll be just like all the other times. You're killing her.

No... It's different. This will be okay. This will be okay... I'm Thomas fucking Quincy. This will be okay!

He pulled his car over, the cell phone ringing for the seventh time. He declined the call, dialing directory assistance instead.

"What listing?" The voice chimed away automatically from the receiver.

"Stuart Harrison..."