And again, I will graciously thank everyone for their reviews – whether they loved or hated chapter 26.
This A/N will be short, but I'll say this: Drama is still lurking and everything isn't right in the world tonight. Please believe...
On another note, people are beginning to have fun with my chapter titles. HAHA! It's a game I see... But everyone was right on the last one, save for one little oversight – the real line goes "You are the antidote that gets me by" and I flipped it with "anecdote". Sort of a poke-fun moment to point out the encompassing absurdity and fear involved with everything. Oooh... Bri's so deep. -rolls eyes at self- Yep...
Oh... and the story won't go back to Jude's view for a minute yet. Oh you've got your reasons... and you've got your manipulations... If you could only see...
I've gotta throw this in here because I just do. Some people say that writing is a very personal experience; that fiction isn't really fiction but a blend of truth and farce, and one must go deeply inside of his or herself to pull out whatever it is they are trying to write. Conveyance of the topic at hand isn't always imagination but reality, and in writing this I've drawn upon a lot of things and sometimes... it hits too close to home. It's odd how that is.
Chapter 27 / Irritated Limericks
Tommy woke up early, too early, drenched in a cold sweat. Dawn had yet to make her day-breaking debut, the room still devoured in inky obscurity. He stared at the invisible ceiling, his breathing ragged and uneven. Nightmares and lived terrors filled his mind and gripped onto his skin. His back hurt to match his head, tingling and spasming over the hard metal springs. Restless sleep and restless mind did not a placid morning make.
Jude clung to his chest ruthlessly, her fists buried and twisted in his damp black t-shirt. She cringed next to him and murmured things amidst her sleeping delirium. He reached for her, holding her arm to settle the skittishly rigid owner on top of him. A move in vain, her quaking intensified.
Tommy's mind ran. The same question kept floating in and out of his consciousness – how do I fix this? He thought about the course of action he'd take, whether he should take her home or to his place, what he'd say to her when she woke up. Some part of him was still dashed with narcissism, thinking that he and he alone would be all that it would take to get her back to the spirited girl he'd always known. Still, a darker, more pessimistic notion couldn't be suppressed. What if I'm the one who finishes her off completely? He didn't want to think about it. He couldn't think about it. He had to be her rock, her iron fortress, her lifeline. If he succumbed to his mindlessness, who would bring Jude back from hers?
He closed his eyes, Jude now quiet and lifeless once again. Morning was a long time coming.
"Jude, come on. You agreed to us getting breakfast."
"Can't leave... Can't leave... They'll kill me..."
"No, they won't. I'll make sure they won't."
Jude sat in the middle of the living room floor once again, eyes wide and body twitching. Tommy sighed; it was all he could do. In the course of twelve hours, he'd taken on the role of partner, shrink, and comforter. He shook off the urge to yell and scream, the scene of her insanity already getting to him.
"No, no... Speak slow... They know..." Her hands searched the ground manically, fingers running over shag and paper. "Shhhhh... they hear you. Make your break... They aren't few..."
He walked closer to her, crouching in the still needless distance.
"We'll get coffee. You like coffee."
"GO!" She instantly grabbed a piece of the broken glass, sobbing as she palmed the razor sharp iridescence. She jabbed the glass in his direction, him jumping back. "You don't hear them... You don't hear them... You don't... You don't... They'll kill you... They'll kill me too." She looked down at her hand, now squeezing the shard painfully. Red seeped in around the edges; she went mute.
Tommy was horrified to see her bleeding; grabbing her arm and prying open her fist. She flinched at his touch, but let him do what he wanted. He examined her palm, slices running in zigzags.
"Oh god, Jude... Come on." He persuaded her to her feet, leading her to the kitchen. He thrust her hand under the running water, a soft whimper mixing with the swishes of the coral spiraling down the drain. He turned off the faucet, and wrapped her hand in a dish towel. He was aggravated, but feared showing it."Do you feel better?"
She looked up at him in between half-closed eyelids, nodding her head in confirmation.
"Coffee. You and me... we... we'll get coffee."
They left the rural city limits and made it back to Toronto in record breaking speed. Jude said nothing. Jude didn't move. In fact, had Tommy not been keeping such a close eye on her, it would have been like he was driving alone.
He pulled into the parking lot of his favorite coffee house; still, Jude remained unaffected.
"Come on. The coffee's in here." He got out and walked to the passenger side door, opening it and getting her out. "It's good, too. Latte, right?"
She didn't say anything and he sighed for what felt like the millionth time that day. He took her bruised hand and led them inside of the shop. He ordered for the both of them, and took her to a far off corner, thinking back to the other café and the other corner and better times.
"Talk." She eyed him expectantly.
"I've been writing again; thinking about going back into the studio to record." He looked her over, making mental comment of how he seemed to be talking to her like a second grader. "I was thinking that you could help me tweak some of the stuff I wrote. You know you have that magic." He smiled in her direction, though it felt like someone had ripped out his stomach through his throat.
"I... I think... yes. Okay." She picked up the china white mug and drank greedily. "The words don't come right... They have me mixed up. Fixed up. But... but... I can't do this. This... here... I..." Her face darkened, brow ruffling. She hit her temples with the heels of her hands. "I used to be... Come out! Say what you need to say! Spit it out!"
Tommy grabbed her wrists, pulling them from their assault. Jude looked to him, lost, her eyes glistening in their deadliness.
"It's ok. I know what you're saying." It hit him that he couldn't do this alone. There was no way he was going to be able to fix this. She transcended the effectiveness of softness and love. "I'm going to go right around that corner, ok? Stay here."
She folded her arms on the table and lay down her head.
"Come back soon."
"I will, Jude. Don't worry." Tommy walked backwards, rethinking his idea to "step away" but knew he had to. He dug his cell from his pocket, and speed dialed without taking his eyes off of Jude.
"Hello?"
Tommy took a deep breath.
"I have her."