All Things Being Equal 2?
Cordelia jerked in her chair when Angel's office door slammed closed. She frowned at the long streak of whiteout she accidentally smeared across the face page of the file she was updating then looked up to give her disturber a piece of her mind. It was Xander and he was on the move, he didn't even acknowledge her as he stormed through the lobby muttering to him self. Cordelia watched with mild amusement as he stomped out of the hotel. Cordelia shook her head. Some things never change, she thought and looked back down at her defaced file and wondered if she should just toss the page and replace it with a new one. It meant filling out all the information from scratch, though. Thanks, a lot Xander!
Cordelia decided to re-do the page and had just trashed the old sheet when Angel burst from the office and ran to the stairs. He climbed several steps then began shouting, "Gunn! Fred! Get down here! Quick!"
He didn't wait for them to appear, he bounded back down the stairs and rushed over to Cordelia. She was surprised to see a look of mania on Angel's face. Cordelia could not remember Angel ever having so many expressions warring for dominance on his face all at once. He looked happy, afraid, confused, hopeful and a dozen other emotions Cordelia couldn't identify… it was like Angel was having a mental breakdown right before her eyes.
"Angel, what's-"
"Have you ever met Xander's family?" Angel interrupted Cordelia, leaning over her desk. Cordelia thought he was about to grab her by the blouse and haul her out of her chair.
"I talked to his mother on the phone a few times, but I never met her in person. Never even talked to his dad."
Angel placed his hands flat against the surface of Cordelia's desk, over a couple of manila folders. He stared down at his hands then asked, "His Uncle Rory, have you ever heard of him?"
Before Cordelia could answer Gunn and Fred came down. Both asking Angel what's wrong. He turned to them and said, "Hurry outside and find Xander. Make sure he doesn't leave."
"How are we supposed to do that?" Gunn asked.
"I don't care. Steal his keys, knock him out, do whatever, but do not let him leave!"
Fred and Gunn saw how frantic Angel was and ran out of the hotel without another word. Angel turned back to Cordelia and told her to keep talking.
"Well, uh, Xander's Uncle Rory is a taxidermist, and I think he runs a mortuary, too."
Cordelia paused, remembering the wealth of personal information Xander told her about his relatives. She also remembered how she used that knowledge to humiliate him. She didn't regret doing it, at least not much; the jerk did cheat on her. He was lucky she decided not to rip out his spleen. What she did feel bad about was that throughout their nasty break up Xander never revealed the intimate things she told him about her parents in retaliation. He could have taken off the gloves, because Cordelia certainly wasn't shy about getting bare knuckle on his ass, but he didn't.
"Does his Uncle live in Sunnydale?"
"I think so."
"Did Xander tell you anything else about him?"
"Xander… he didn't like talking about his family."
Angel straightened and stared at the empty space over Cordelia's head. "How does he know?" he asked that same space. "It's not a coincidence." Angel turned and ran through the lobby and exited the hotel. Cordelia wasn't long in following.
Thank God that's over and done with! Xander rejoiced. Frankly, he could have done without Angel's oh-so-superior attitude. Like Xander hadto come and apologize to his undead ass! As far as Xander is concerned Angel is an asshole and always will be an asshole, and he deserved every nasty, unnecessarily snarktastic thing Xander ever said to or about him!
Keeping a lookout for vampires and other assorted demonic presences, Xander hurried to his rental. "It's all about how many speed laws I can ignore before I get pulled over by the cops, now," he said out loud to no one. He had the key in the car door lock when he heard footsteps behind him.
Xander turned around and pressed his butt against the car door and pulled a stake out of his coat pocket, brandishing the sharp piece of wood in front of him. He didn't know rather to be relieved or suspicious when he saw it was just Fred and Gunn running up on him. Xander ended up putting the stake away before they reached him.
The pair shuffled their feet in front of him without saying a word, as if Xander was supposed to guess why they were there. "What? Did a paper clip come up missing?" Xander asked to fill the silence. It was sort of rude, but Angel really knew how to bring out the snotty in him.
Stupid vampire!
"Uh… Er… nice car," Gunn greeted awkwardly. Xander only just met the man and he knew Gunn was acting strange, because somehow Xander didn't think Gunn said or did anything so gawkily.
"Right. Thanks. What do you want?"
Fred tried to smile which failed miserably to put Xander at ease. "We want to apologize. For how rude we were to you before," she said.
Xander relaxed a bit at that, he had a weakness for pretty women, especially pretty women who say they're sorry. It helped that it didn't happen all that often to him, so it was sort of a novelty. "Thank you. It's okay, really, you guys're stressed, it happens. Well, I guess I'll see you later." Likely never so don't hold your breath, y'all.
Xander turned to open the car door; he unlocked and opened it only to have it slammed closed by Fred. Xander looked her, stunned by her actions. "Wait! Let us take you to dinner. You must be hungry, you waited for Cordy and Angel for a long time."
"No, I'm not-"
"I know this place that serves good tacos," Gunn climbed over Xander's reply.
"Tacos? I don't-"
"Our treat," Fred interrupted. "It's the least we can do for how we treated you."
"Look, I don't know what-"
"Xander!" Xander was really tired of getting interrupted, and he especially didn't appreciate Angel doing it.
Angel was running full-tilt at the trio. Angel's eyes were utterly predatory; like the way a female lion, or a cheetah keeps their eyes on their prey while they chased it down. And Xander noticed all that intent was intensely focused on him, and that got him grabbing the stake out of his jacket before he registered he'd done it.
Xander might as well have kept the stake in his coat for all the good it did him. Angel bashed into Fred and Gunn, passed them and calmly knocked the sharpened wood right out of Xander's hand. Xander did the only thing he could do in a situation like this: he let out a mighty squeak and tried to scramble into the rental car. Angel grabbed him by the shoulders and turned him back around then leaned his face forward and peered at Xander as if though through a microscope and Xander was a particularly tiny ameba. Fear was coursing through Xander like it was the very blood in his veins, his heart pumping that terror quick and hard. Xander never thought he'd be this afraid of Angel again. Of course he sometimes got cold sweats imagining Angel popping a big happy and taking a road trip back to Sunnydale to paint the town red, but after a while that kind of worry became like worrying about prostate cancer: sure it could happen, but probably far, far in the future. Only difference being there was an uncomfortable exam you can take regularly to catch the ass cancer in time, whereas Angelus was like a sudden lethal viral infection no one can do anything about until it was too late.
Angel seemed utterly unaware of Xander's fear and kept staring at him real creepy-like. Xander tried to swallow some of his fear, but his mouth was dry as a bone and it made that fear tough to gulp down. Angel's hands slipped down around Xander's forearms and tightened just before he pulled Xander in close so he could start sniffing at Xander's bare neck. The skin of Angel's nose and his lips and his sharp inhalation of air tickled, it was like being mugged by a wet-nosed puppy. Xander giggled, stopped, and realized Angel's actions were so very not a part of rightness and found the strength to tear him self free of Angel's grasp. Then he pushed the startled vampire away and smacked Angel on top of his head.
"Bad vampire! Bad, bad vampire!" Xander scolded, wagging his finger at Angel.
"Angel, what in Gucci's name are you doing to Xander?" Cordelia asked. At some point she joined them on the street. She looked unnerved; Fred and Gunn weren't doing much better. Fred covered her mouth with her hand, staring at Angel's back with wide eyes. Gunn had his head craned to the side, his left eyebrow arched as he appraised Angel with a glance that said, 'What's up with that?'
Angel was breathing hard, which was odd, because vampires don't do the breathing thing, and he was still burning his stare into Xander. And he went on staring as Xander finally got rid of his fear and replaced it with a good steam of indignation. Angel has no book getting all hand-sy and sniff-y with me like that! Xander thought
"Yeah," Xander said out loud, agreeing with his internal rant, "you can't go around treating me like a… I don't know exactly what that was, but it was not… kosher… pal…"
Angel's face changed and before Xander could scream for help, Angel's sharp teeth were in his neck. Angel sucked down a couple of mouthfuls of his blood before Cordy, Fred and Gunn pulled him off Xander. Their cries of outrage and shock were like whispers in Xander's ears. He dropped to his knees, the asphalt grinding into his kneecaps, and clutched his throat. Angel bit him. Angel bit him and drank his blood. This was unreal. A vampire never bit him before —and Angel did it. Weird. Wring his neck, break his neck, drop him from a cliff, sure, but Xander never, ever, thought Angel would bite him.
"Are you crazy, man?" Xander heard Gunn scream.
"And you pick Xander of all people to bite? I mean seriously, Angel, just because you're desperate it doesn't mean you have to scarp the bottom of the blood barrel!" Cordelia criticized.
Xander missed Cordelia… with every assault and battery attempt so far.
"Xander, are you all right?" Fred asked. She was kneeling beside Xander. She gently pulled Xander's hand away from the bite wound on his neck and he felt her fingers prod around it. It stung more than Xander imagined a vampire bite would, but he let her continue examining the bite without protest.
"It's him," Angel said.
There was a broken quality to Angel's voice. That creaky tone was disturbing enough that Xander had to look at him. The vampire's face was normal and he was staring at Xander weird again, but the creepiness in Angel's eyes was dialed down by a thousand Xander was relieved to see. Gunn and Cordy were tightly holding on to Angel's arms in case he came after Xander again. Xander wasn't sure how effective they'd be if Angel decided he really wanted another taste of his moist and deliciousness.
"Angel?" Cordelia queried, and there was concern in her voice now. Story of Xander's life: he's bleeding to death (okay, not really but) and the dead guy gets everybody's sympathy.
"It's him, Cordelia," Angel said, his voice was clearer, stronger, but tears spilled from his eyes. Fred ceased fussing with Xander's bite when she noticed Angel's tears. She stood and stepped closer to the vampire, her concern for Xander completely forgotten.
"Who's him? What are you talking about?" Gunn asked.
Xander wanted to know the same thing. He looked at Cordelia to see if she was any closer to understanding her boss's behavior but found that she was looking back at him with an expression very similar to Angel's. Uh-oh. Suddenly, Xander didn't want to know a damn thing about Angel's drama. He wanted to be in his neat little compact with its new car smell, tooling back to Sunnydale.
"Oh my God," Cordelia whispered. She let go of Angel's arm and backed away, her right hand cupped over her mouth. Angel shrugged his other arm out of Gunn's hold and walked forward. Fred moved out of his way and Angel knelt down in front of Xander. Xander leaned back and back until his back was against the rental. He wasn't so much scared, but freaked out beyond his ability to comprehend it.
Angel brought his hands up and cupped Xander's jaw and stroked his skin tenderly before moving his right hand up into Xander's hair and his left over Xander's mouth and nose and brow. Xander felt Angel's fingers rake through his hair just as lovingly as he caressed his face. Then with blinding speed Angel wrapped Xander up in his arms and hugged him.
"My boy. My boy. My boy," Angel said again and again.
"Uh, Angel ack, dude, what's going on…" Xander choked out, but Angel kept repeating 'my boy' and his hug remained snug. Looking over Angel's shoulder Xander saw Cordy still standing a ways back, no longer covering her mouth, but she maintained the same overwhelmed expression on her face. She looked like she'd been told her entire wardrobe was out of style and every mall in the greater Los Angeles area was closed indefinitely.
Fred and Gunn faced each other, conversing in hissed whispers. Then they stopped and looked at him and Angel. Fred was crying now, too, and Gunn looked like a flash-bang exploded in his face—there was a lot of blinking and head shaking. Looks like they figured out what the hell this madness is about, Xander thought. Now if only somebody would give him a hint—even a small one would make his whole frickin' day.
Xander tried to speak but couldn't manage more than breathing with Angel holding him so tightly. Then matters got even stranger, because Fred run over and joined the vampire in hugging him. Then Gunn came over, but he didn't hug Xander, he stood by and smiled with surprising affection at him. Xander was beginning to think the whole group was certifiably insane, except Cordelia, who stayed back from them, crying silently. Xander thought maybe he spoke too soon when she approached them slowly. He was afraid she was going to start fawning over him too, but when she came within two feet her joyful, tear-filled eyes suddenly went wide and her expression scrunched into a grimace.
"Bleech! I made out with you!" she cried. "I was going to have sex with you!" Cordelia started retching.
Well, that was uncalled for, Xander thought.
Angel released him, for which Xander was extremely grateful. Angel kept a grip on Xander's shoulders and held him at arms length, looking at Xander with absolute marvel and exuberance. Xander figured now was his chance to ask why Angel and his merry band of nut jobs acted like he was the second coming.
"Xander, I'm sorry I bit you, but I had to know for certain," Angel apologized before Xander could ask anything.
"Know what for certain, you lunatic?"
"You… You're… Six weeks ago a demon called Sahjan opened a portal and sent a man and a baby through it. I thought the portal led to another dimension but it didn't," Angel turned his head around and looked at his friends. "That's why we couldn't find them. Sahjan lied to me that night." Angel faced Xander again and beamed a smile as big and bright as the sun and said, "He sent them back in time."
"Back in time. That's interesting. What does this have to do with you treating me like a chew toy?" Xander asked. There wasn't actually an answer Angel could give that was going to satisfy him, but he was curious to hear the vampire's excuse.
"That man in the drawing, you said he looked like your uncle," Angel said.
"Uh-uh, yeeeah?"
"Xander, I… I d-don't know h-how… b-but…" Angel stuttered, new tears sprung up in his eyes.
"For God's sakes, spit it out, Angel!" Xander shouted. Crying Angel got on his nerves more than any other kind of Angel Xander's met to date.
Cordelia got over whatever her issues were and came up to Xander and Angel. Xander looked at her and was glad to see her composure was back to Bitch Queen of the Universe. He could really use some ordinary contact right now.
"He's saying you were the baby, Xander," Cordy said like she was telling him the time.
Xander looked at her then at Angel to see if he'd catch one of them laughing. When he didn't, Xander glanced at Gunn and Fred. No such luck. All four of them looked dead serious. Hell, Angel and Fred were on the verge of weeping. Xander returned his gaze to Cordelia. He trusted her, he always will. No matter what happened between them in the past Xander could always count on Cordelia's ability to wield her honesty like a blunt instrument. He needed that from her right now if he was going to understand what the hell was going on.
"Tell me you guys' aren't serious, Cordy?"
Angel squeezed Xander's shoulders and said, "It's true, Xander."
Xander had no interest in Angel's claims and ignored him. "So what if I'm this kid, I'm not, but for argument's sake let's say I am, why get touchy feely with me?"
Cordelia looked at the ground. Then Xander heard her sniffling, but his ears had to be deceiving him. Cordy didn't cry when she got impaled on a piece of rusty rebar. "Cordy—?" Xander started to ask if she was all right then Cordelia threw her arms around his waist and buried her face against his shoulder, sobbing loudly.
"Xander," Angel said and Xander looked at the vampire in a daze, "that baby, that baby was my son. You're my son."