Note: Hey! I've got a new language editor, so I get real-people translations now! Yay! I'm feeling much better, school is well underway, and I have had the worst Harry Potter writer's block EVER. I still haven't finished book six, though I only have about 100-odd pages left. Little Harbinger asked that I tell you what the Sorting Hat was going on about while Harry was chasing butterflies in his head, so I decided you shouldn't suffer any longer, and will post an intermission-type chapter following this note and disclaimer. This is incongruous to the story, kinda like a deleted scene. Or you could imagine that once he got tired of politics, his subconscious regurgitated what Gryffindor's old topper babbled about, and I was moved to include the comments from the other students and the professors.

Disclaimer: I HAVE NEVER READ ANY FICTIONAL MATERIAL PERTAINING TO WORLD OF DARKNESS. Out of curiosity, I visited the official (?) webpage, and it seems to be about vampires. I don't quite know why it was mentioned as being absent from my initial disclaimer, but after some thought I went with plugging in an additional disclaimer, with this information included. I hope everyone understands that I can't say every book that HASN'T influenced me, and you really must trust that I list all the ones that HAVE influenced me in plot, characters, actions, dialogue, or setting of THIS STORY, which I will list now to the best of my ability

1. Naturally, Harry Potter novels 1-5 and the aforementioned first two thirds or so of the sixth book inspired the fanfiction and plot as a whole.

2. The Niotan species from the Star Wars fanfiction Tiercel by Vermilion Flame (who is not archived on this site) inspired, to some degree, the tribal markings on the elves.

3. A book I read in like, fifth grade about a faerie changeling, which I was spontaneously reminded of while contemplating Harry Potter's family. I mean, come on, my grandparents have several siblings apiece, many with children and grandchildren of their own. There's no way that Petunia and Dudley would be the last living carriers of Evans' blood. Albus probably used a spell to find the closest blood relative, and I doubt Petunia was the only one on the list.

That really is all I can think of.

-Sorting Hat-

"James Potter's son…"

"…Harry Potter?"

"Harry Potter!"

"She said he was Harry Potter, oh, Merlin, I think I'll die of shock!"

"I knew he would be a young first year, but he doesn't look more than nine!"snorts

-"Wait, Percy, who's Harry Potter?"

-"He's only the greatest wizard that was ever born!"

-"She's a normal Muggle-born, Hermione…most girls don't read your kind of book for entertainment."

-nose upturned"Sorry, Neville."mutter"Philistines."

"…James…"

-"Think he remembers that Halloween?"

-"Not a chance! He would've been what, two years old, tops?"

awed whisper"…So much like James…"

"I wonder if he dreams of He-Who-Must…"

"…Another fool Potter…"

-"Ten Galleons says he's a Gryffindor, Lee."

-eyes roll"I don't take sucker bets, Fred."

"Look at those pretty green eyes!"girlish cooing

"…tiny bloke, isn't he?"snickers

"He's a lovely little lad, Professor Dumbledore, sir, said a few words I didn't for the life of me expect from a Littlun, so charming…"

"…his hair is just as unkempt as his father's, he clearly thinks he's some sort of royalty, strutting forward like a mangy old cat – terribly sorry, Minerva." sarcasm

Another Potter boy, hm? Ah, he and Lily did manage it, then. Good, good. Potters were always strong hands for Gryffindors, while Lily and her brother really could have gone almost anywhere. Of course, she didn't know he was her brother, and he didn't remember her too well, but Helmuth would have done just as well in Slytherin or Ravenclaw, as would Lily. Pity that the Slytherins found out she wasn't a pureblooded witch; she would have done well by them.

But I suppose James wouldn't have paid much serious mind to a Slytherin, no matter how pretty and bright. As much as I like my former owner's House, its occupants tend to get quite prejudiced if the teachers don't work at keeping them civil. But I trust that the young prince knows when to hold his tongue?

You, now, are perfect for each house. Exceptionally brilliant and well-prepared for school, which is an Elf trait if I ever saw one…though you're not paying a whit of attention to anyone, myself included, you will undoubtedly do well in Hogwarts, and your hunger for knowledge would gain you prestige in Ravenclaw.

Slytherin is equally suited to you. Though not naturally overly ambitious, you do strive for improvement, learn from failure, make true friends, and Elf-magic is considered a Dark Art by the Ministry, if only because they can't track it or practice it without elf-blood and exceptional raw power reserves. Truly a flagrant disregard of the customs of a magical being – almost as much of a flagrant disregard as you are showing me now, young Prince Potter.

Ah, the lacking attention span of youth. Strange that James had so much less than Lily when it came to class, but stranger still that he could overcome that and dedicate himself completely to something as monumental as wooing her. No matter.

Helmuth, your uncle, he was a fine Hufflepuff, and you'd do well there, also, highly loyal, honest, and trusting.

But no, Gryffindor is best. Brave, with the nobility of your father's great family and your mother's royal lineage, combined with the courage of a lion – I see that little protest of yours, Prince Potter. Enjoy your new House.

GRYFFINDOR!