I have the idea of the story now, so I can finally understand how to write this and what will happen. Must not reveal plot twist and spoil it. So ahem, let's just start before I blurt out what happens x3! Which I sort of did to Origin x3 But no fears meh friend, I did say it wasn't what I told you, remember? Heh!

How can you see into my eyes
Like open doors?
Lading you down into my core,
Where I've become so numb.

Without a soul,
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold,
Until you find it there and lead it back
Home

All of this sight,
I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark
but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a 1000 years it seems.
I've got to open my eyes to everything.
Without a thought
Without a voice
Without a soul
Don't let me die here.
There must be something more.
Bring me to life

Chapter Four: Courage Is Not Enough

It was the day after I had learned of Kratos' death trial. It was a shock to me, and I couldn't believe it was a true. Silently I had aspired that Kratos would be all right, and I tried my hardest to forget that this was actually happening. But the hardest I endeavored, the more the reality of what was happening to Kratos flowed through my mind. As sharp and painful as betrayal.

"Kratos, wake up," I spoke banging on his door. It was so unlike me to wake him up when he was the one who would always arise me from my place. Yawning, I banged my fist against the the door. Lowering my gaze angrily, I banged my fist once more.

"Leave me alone Yuan," I just stood there, shocked. Did Kratos just tell me to leave him alone? Since when did I ever listen to him, and I wouldn't start now. A low growl emerged from my throat, as I banged don his door once more.

"Kratos, get up or I'll be forced to blast your door to oblivion," I warned. Now I knew how Kratos felt when I never wanted to get up. It was like our lives were flipped, or do or say reversed to where Kratos didn't even want to contact with me after he had claimed I was the only one he wanted with him when he attempted to break his spell on the key crest. But now he wouldn't even answer my constant bangs on his door. No reply; I sighed and uneasily began to cast a simple and weak spell, just enough to undo the lock on his door. Nothing too complicated. The spell released and the door made a click and opened a bit. Sighing, I extended a hand to the knob, swallowed my pride, and walked in with dread.

Yuan, I told you to leave me alone," Was all he spoke. I twitched uneasily and just perceived of what Kratos' current state was. With crimson wings extended, I starred at Kratos' ruby eyes, which seemed soulless. He truly lost his will to live. My stomach lurched as I walked over to Kratos, more in a stubborn defiance I always had to him.

"I won't leave you Kratos, now get up and stop being so sorrowful, you'll be fine," I behest to Kratos irritated. I was so used to the one who was dragged out of bed, I found it hard to be a hypocrite. Shaking my head, I waited for a reply.

"There's no point in getting up," He replied. What was with his attitude! This was the most crucial point in his life were he needed to be positive, but he was acting so unlike himself. If he wanted any chance of living, he best change his attitude. Because of he no strive to live, what point was there for me to assist him? I wouldn't be like Mithos.

"Kratos, just shut up. I'm trying to help you, so the least you can do is cooperate or I'll leave your lazy ass here," Hissing those words I felt I was lying to myself. Really, I had no intention of leaving him, ever. But these times were when he got on my nerves. I just wanted him him to be ok, just to live a carefree eternal life alongside his friend's, family, and me.

"Just leave me to be by myself for my last days," He spoke cruelly. Last Days? He wasn't sure he was going to die. I knew he would pull through this and break Mithos' cruel spell. It was a matter of life and death but I knew Kratos would come around when the verdict was being made. But could I honestly count on his participation?

"I'm not leaving this room to you get up!" Snapping at Kratos made me feel on the opposite side. I was starting to sound like a 'parent' just like he was. That thought sent shivers down my spine. Never would I stoop to what he had done, unless I was with Martel. Stiffing back up, I starred blankly at Kratos, still waiting for his reply.

"Humph, stubborn as hell," He retorted glancing at me for the first time this morning. My heart ached to see his condition. It was getting worse everyday. Raising his head, he uneasily flapped his wings but remained silent. We exchanged silent words, but I couldn't stand him in such misery. I just wanted to know when I started to feel so compelled to him. If this was when he first joined our journey; I would have left him to die. But everything was different. He wasn't just a inconsiderate human that hated my kind so much, he was a loyal friend.

"I'd rather you hate me then leave for eternity," I replied bitterly. For some reason those words had startled Kratos. Widening his eyes astounded for my 'care' you could say that his life was important. It seemed he was struggling for words, mentally and physically.

"Yuan; contact Lloyd for me," He suddenly addressed with urgency. Tilting my head in confusion, I nodded stiffly, not wanting to question Kratos. I knew he knew what he was doing, although he was on the verge of a break-down. I left the room, glancing over my shoulder to make sure he wouldn't do something he would regret. Or I would regret.

I walked over to the transmitter that sat on a high cabinet. We hadn't used it for so long, it was gathering an abundant amount of dust. Afraid it was out of mana, I picked it up and lightly transferred some of my mana into it. If it was something Kratos wanted, or needed, I could spare that small amount of myself. After I had touched the transmitter, it clicked on and displayed a list of names. The second one from the top bore Lloyd's name in bold letters. With a flick of my wrist, I clicked the transmitter and it made a buzzing sound.

I thought for a moment, then brought the transmitter into Kratos' room. If he wanted contact with Lloyd, my best ideas were he wanted to talk to him personally, not through my words, which I doubted he believed after what had happened last visit. Kratos glanced at me as I re entered. His eyes traveled from me to the transmitter that was vibrating.

"He should pick up any second," I instructed Kratos. He was wordless until his son picked up. His voice was so stunned that the transmitter was actually being used.

"Dad?" Lloyd asked. I closed my eyes and felt a bit better seeing Lloyd still found it in his heart to call Kratos his father. I watched Kratos lean closer to the transmitter and weakly spoke words, as if he hurt to talk. What I could hear was an urgent news in address to himself. Of course I knew what it was, but before I could walk over and tell Lloyd, I saw Kratos click it off and close his eyes.

"What?" I asked muddled by what the two had just spoke. Without another word, Kratos withdrew his wings. I was sure he was telling me Lloyd would arrive. I hesitated a bit, but then gave a sharp nod, although Kratos couldn't see it.

"He's coming, correct?" I asked, knowing he was. It felt better to actually state the obvious, so I was sure of it. With a weak ved, Kratos opened his eyes once more and beckoned for me to come over. Looking confused, I paced over to where the seraphim sat.

"Yuan, if anything happens to me, make sure Lloyd stays safe," He spoke in a melancholy voice. I took a step back akwardly. Did he just tell me to take of his son that hated me so much. If anything happens? He was taking this too far. Nothing would happen, I was sure and I had to make Kratos see that.

"Kratos, you aren't going to die, I'm sure of it," I spoke, trying to lighten his mood. But my attempts were casted away like old news. His eyes reflected his pain and misery. Just removing this key crest could solve everything, and we could return to our normal lives. Maybe that's why he had requested Lloyd's presense.

"Just promise me, please," Was all he said. He went silent and just sat there, like he was already gone. I bit my upper lip stubbornly and crossed myarms in frustration. What a negeative attitude. I yawned a bit then turned to Kratos, as if I wanted to say something. Nothing came out, just emptyless sighs. Without taking notice, Kratos remained as stiff as stone.It was as if he had become a statue.

"Dad?" I perked my ears and heard the front door open. I was still un-prepared to confront the younger swordsmen. Secretly I prayed that Kratos would explain. He himself knew more about his condition. Kratos didn't budge or reply, so clearing my throat, I tried to seem as crude and un-concerned as I could.

"He's back here," I managed, in almost a hiss. A few moments passed with reply. But after turning my back from Kratos, I heard Lloyd enter the room. I knew what was going to happen next. He would ask why I was here, then all the truth would come out. Everything, everything from Kratos' condition to our relationship. I clenched my teeth and didn't turn around.

"Kratos, are you ok?" He asked, his voice quavering with every other word. I wasn't sure whether to tell him what was going on, or to wait for Kratos to speak up. But as the seconds ticked by, Kratos hadn't seemed to say anything. I turned around and saw Kratos starring at his son with fear and dread. My heart sank lower.

"Lloyd.." He began. I could tell Lloyd was more concerned with what Kratos was going to say more then my presence. I watched in silence, I couldn't tell if I was a good place to speak. Doubting it was, I remained still. But it wasn't long before Kratos had begun his current crisis. I remained silent, everyword he spoke felt like razor sharp nails piecring my heart. I glanced over and saw Lloyd devasted then began to shake.

"It's all my fault... I destroyed his Cruxis Crystal," Lloyd spoke, on the verge of tears. He held his head in fear, but I didn't say anything. I just remained where I was. Glancing over, Kratos made a gesture for me to join in. Not entirely sure if I should accept, I took a few paces towars the duo. Kratos turned back to his son.

"Lloyd, I need your help with removing my key crest," He finally said. Lloyd's eyes suddenely filled with horror. He seemed angry and offended by Kratos' request. On alert, I turned to Lloyd, not wanting Kratos to have to reason with his persistent son.

"Lloyd, if you don't, he will slowly die," I mutterted. I couldn't believe I was actually saying this! He just couldn't die, I knew he couldn't. He was granted an eternal life, but could Mithos alter that life? Something in my gut said he would be fine.

"Fine..." Lloyd finally said, he had tears in his eyes but bite his lip so he couldn't show it. I knew he was afraid to take off the key crest. In attempts to make Lloyd feel more comfortable, although it was impossible to feel contempt at a moment like this, I spoke as I closed my eyes.

"It's been enchanted with a spell, so only a dwarf or one who knows their arts can remove it," I explainied. Lloyd looked over at me with a deafly stare. Offended, I glared back at him.

"I know that," He warned me walking over to his father. If Lloyd hadn't hated me so much as he did, I would have guessed his fear and pain was creating anger. But I knew how the swordsmen felt towards me so I just had to accept the bitter truth.

"Are you ready?" Lloyd spoke shaking. Kratos looked from Lloyd then rested his glance at me as if to say he wanted me to think about the promise I had uneasily commited to. I doubted I would have to hold true to it. Lloyd was talented in these arts, and if anyone could remove this key crest, it would be him.

"Alright.." Lloyd spoke as Kratos extending his hand which bore the symbol of his past. My heart thropped. Everything was going fine so far. Had he lied about the risk of dieing? Everything was going so smoothly. At that moment I felt enraged that Kratos had lied until Lloyd took off the crest and relief flooded over to me.

"Kratos, you're finally free," I spoke walking over happily followed by Lloyd. A smirk rolled across his face. At first I thought he was joyous also, but then a horrible gut feeling filled me. That wasn't his smirk he always had when we were together. Something was wrong.

"Thank You Lloyd," Kratos spoke weakly. Lloyd just stood there, frozen as ice. Kratos looked over at me as his wings extended without his command. "Please hold true to your promise. I wish I could have spent more time with you Yuan, and although I always denied it, you were the only person other then Anna I ever felt for. Good bye..." And with that his eyes shut softly and he fell limply onto the bed. Shock flooded over me like a raging river.

"DAMNIT! Kratos no!" I hollered. I couldn't hold it in, even though Lloyd was standing two feet away. I knelt down next to the bed and held him in my arms. His body was ice cold. No shaking, no pain, just silence. For the first time since Martel had departed, tears streamed down my face.

"You promised me you'd never leave," I spoke shutting my eyes tightly. I felt like just sitting there forever. Nothing meant anything anymore. Lloyd walked over, shaking.

"Dad..." He spoke shaking. It was true he was his father, but he hadn't have spent all those years that I had. My heart throbbed as I hold the stiff body of Kratos.

"You knew you'd die, damnit Kratos," I spoke as tears rolled down my face. My whole eternal life would be spent without him by my side. Right now I wish I could just die. Just die and leave this wrecked world Mithos has trashed so horribly.

"Kratos," Lloyd spoke burying his face into his hands as he sat down. I couldn't tell if he was crying, but it didn't matter. He held Kratos in my arms tightly.

"You never let me say good bye," I spoke weakily. He had gotten the last word, it was his way or dieing. I just sat there, in misery.

"Wake up! Damnit, just wake up Kratos!" I shook his body violently then buried my head into his chest and wept. "Don't go... please, don't leave me.."

Author's Note:

My keys are all wet from tears. KRATOS NO! WHY! (bangs into a wall) NO KRATOS! Kratos... and yes there will be another chapter. Please read it, just trust me. I'll do my best to put it up soon. I promise. (goes off to cry)