Regrets

By Bernadeen

Chapter 3

2035 Friday
Admiral Chegwidden's Home

After a quiet dinner, AJ Chegwidden sat down to enjoy more of the latest best seller he had started earlier in the week. He was just beginning to lose himself in the plot when his phone rang. The caller identified himself as a member of the DC police. His next words turned AJ's blood cold. Commander Harmon Rabb had been the victim of a shooting at a convenience store robbery near his home earlier that evening. He had been taken to Bethesda. The police officer told AJ that the wound appeared serious though the Commander had been alive when the ambulance left for the hospital.

AJ ended the call and quickly dialed Bethesda Naval Hospital. After being put on hold and transferred twice, the admiral used his strongest command tone to finally get some information. He was told that Commander Rabb was in surgery, but that was all he could find out. Slamming down the phone, AJ grabbed his coat and keys, knowing he urgently needed to get to the hospital. He knew Mattie would need to be notified, but he needed to know more himself before he could contact her. There was a time when he would automatically tell Mac immediately when Harm was in trouble, but that time was past. For whatever reason, Harm and Mac's friendship seemed to have ended. It was sad really, AJ thought. While he had warned them not to get too close, their friendship made them an unbeatable professional team. They were each still outstanding officers in their own right but they were no longer a team.

AJ arrived at the hospital and located the surgical floor. The nurse at the desk looked up wearily as he approached.

"I'm here about Commander Harmon Rabb. He was brought in with a gunshot wound and he was in surgery about a half hour ago. What can you tell me?"

The nurse looked back at him coolly. "Are you family, because if not …" she began unhelpfully.

AJ clamped down on his impatience but interrupted in his no-nonsense I-expect- to-be-obeyed voice, "I'm Admiral AJ Chegwidden, the Judge Advocate General, and Commander Rabb's commanding officer. Now what can you tell me?"

Suddenly becoming much more helpful, the nurse clicked some keys on the computer and looked at the information on the screen in front of her. "Commander Rabb is still in surgery, sir. There's a family waiting room down this hall, second door on the right. I'll send word so that the surgeon will see you as soon as he can."

AJ walked into the waiting room. It was surprisingly attractive and comfortable. The Admiral sat down in one of the overstuffed chairs, the type more often found in someone's living room. After a few minutes, AJ couldn't stand the inaction and got up to move around the room. He remembered seeing a refreshment area just outside the waiting room, and he went to see whether there was any fresh coffee. Luck would have it that the pot was full and appeared to be freshly made. AJ poured himself a cup and wondered how long he dared to wait until he contacted Mattie. PO Coates was her roommate, as he understood it, and he decided at least to give her some warning, though he still didn't want to tell Mattie until they knew more. If Rabb didn't make it, he would need to tell her in person.

He dialed his yeoman's home number before he realized that it was approaching 2200. Jen answered on the second ring.

"Coates, its Admiral Chegwidden."

"Yes, Admiral. What can I do for you?" Jen's voice indicated she immediately felt trouble.

AJ worked to keep his voice calm. "Jennifer, there's been a shooting …" he hesitated. "I don't want to talk to her, but is Mattie there?"

Jen's voice shook slightly when she answered, "No, sir. She's at a friend's house tonight… it's Commander Rabb, isn't it? Is he… is he…?"

"He's alive .. in surgery at Bethesda. I don't know anything else and I don't want to upset Mattie until I know more."

"I understand, sir." There was relief but still fear in her voice. She remembered only too clearly waiting outside sickbay on the Guadalcanal while Bud was in surgery .. the hours of anxious waiting, fear tearing her stomach to pieces until she had thrown up. She was glad the Admiral wanted to spare Mattie that if he could. "Do you know what happened?"

"The police said it was a convenience store robbery … wrong place, wrong time, I guess." AJ felt incredibly tired as he uttered the time-worn, yet true, phrase.

"Sir, have you told anyone else from JAG ops?" she was sure the Colonel would want to know even if she and Harm hadn't been getting along very well lately.

"No, not yet. Not much point until he's at least out of surgery. I'll call as soon as I hear more."

"Yes, sir."

Jennifer carefully placed the phone in its cradle and sank down on the couch. She felt like the world had tipped 90 degrees on its axis and everything was crazily wrong. Commander Rabb .. he was invincible, wasn't he? He couldn't be in any real danger, could he? Jennifer had grown up learning to be strong and tough. She had to be to withstand the withering criticism of her father and his religious condemnation of her.

In the Navy she had been in a war zone and had seen Bud Roberts seriously injured just a few feet from her. She knew it could happen to anyone, anytime, anywhere. Yet, after all of the dangerous missions the Commander had been on over the years, to be gunned down in a robbery in his own neighborhood. It was too tragic to even think about. Though Jennifer had been raised with continual religious teachings, her father's treatment hadn't endeared her to religion. When Bud was injured, she tried to find some faith and remember how to pray. She was not sure her feeble attempts had helped but he did pull through. Now Jennifer Coates reached deep inside herself and found the strength and the words to once again pray for a wounded comrade.

2430 Friday
National Navy Medical Center
Bethesda

Time dragged on as AJ waited for word. Rabb had been in surgery for hours .. that couldn't be a good sign. Yet, it meant he was still alive. AJ must have dozed a bit because suddenly he looked up to see in the doorway a figure in surgical green. The doctor's hair was dark with sweat and his smock showed a few blood splatters. He stepped forward. "Admiral, I'm Commander Donovan. I'm Commander Rabb's surgeon."

AJ stood up quickly, trying to read the doctor's face as to whether he had good or bad news. The doctor was experienced at making his expression unreadable and AJ had to wait for the doctor to make his report. Still he asked impatiently, "Commander, how is he?"

"He's alive," Dr. Donovan said cautiously, ".. for now."

AJ felt his heart constrict. "That bad?"

"Commander Rabb is remarkably strong and fit or he would be dead now. The bullet collapsed a lung, nicked an artery, but missed his heart. There was a lot of blood loss and we had problems stopping the bleeding. There continues to be the danger of leakage and if he starts to bleed again, I don't know how much more surgery he can withstand. There's always the danger of blood clots in these cases, too, and pneumonia. The next few hours will be critical. If he survives 24 hours, he probably has a chance. I'm sorry I don't have more encouraging news, Admiral, but as long as he's alive, there is hope. And we're doing everything we can to keep him that way."

"Do you expect him to be conscious?"

"I doubt it, at least for a few hours. In fact, it's best that he be as quiet as possible."

"No visitors, then?" AJ was thinking of Mattie and how she would react, having lost her mother just over a year ago.

"We allow one visitor at a time in ICU. Even though he isn't conscious, it often seems to help to have someone he's close to talk to him. I've seen loved ones almost literally hold severely ill patients back from death's door. If there's someone close to him .. wife, girlfriend .. ?"

"He has several close friends and a daughter. I'll make some calls. Thank you, Doctor."

After the doctor left the waiting room, AJ made a quick decision. It was time to call Mac. Then he would call Coates and go to get Mattie himself. He would call Bud but ask that he and Harriett wait until tomorrow to come to the hospital. They couldn't do anything tonight and he didn't want them to have to find childcare at this time of night. Pulling out his phone, he dialed Mac's home.

End Chapter 3