Masked Blindness
Please review, I know it's a little different so I really need your opinions.
Disclaimer
I don't own OUATIM or POTO
Sands sat alone the smoke from his third cigarette pluming a cloud of smoke around him. He felt trapped in his own warped mind there was no escape from the vicious thoughts that snaked through his mind. No matter where he turned the crushing blackness was there waiting to smother him. The only company he had were his dark thoughts.
Down once more to the dungeon of my black despair! Down we plunge to the prison of my mind! Down that path into darkness deep as hell! Why, you ask, was I bound and chained in this cold and dismal place? Not for any mortal sin, but the wickedness of my abhorrent face!
He couldn't go out into the streets of Mexico and walk his beat setting up shapes and watching them fall like he had before. The cocky confidence that was in his very make up was tarnished by this deformity. He was so sure he always knew what was going on around him, he was in control at all times, and he pulled all the strings, that was at least what he believed.
Not only did he believe he would have all of Mexico walking his beat but he would have restored the balance and have a nice cash sum to spend with a beautiful woman. He had taken a risk letting her in on his schemes, he had been willing to share everything with her. Too bad she wasn't thinking along the same lines as him. She had played him the whole time and he had been to blind or too stupid too see it.
and now, how you've repaid me: denied me and betrayed me . . .
Was this some sort of sick punishment? A payback for all the people he had killed and hurt over the years? Was this really the fate he deserved? A way of making him "look" at what his world was an eternal black hole of suffering and misery?
He kills without a thought. He murders all that's good.
Maybe this was what the world needed to save them from the havoc and destruction he left everywhere he went. This way he was cut off from the world. People would run from him before they got close enough to hurt him. The only way he could deal with those who saw his face was by killing them. He could not stand the thought of people being out there knowing what he looked like.
That fate which condemns me to wallow in blood has also denied me the joys of the flesh.
He wore a permanent mask, he hid behind his sunglasses, he never took them off, not even when he was alone. It made him feel too exposed, too vulnerable. Sheldon Jeffery Sands was no longer the man he was, she had broken him and he wasn't sure he had the energy or the willpower too rebuild himself. He was too full of self hatred and self loathing.
Masquerade paper faces on display hide your face so the world will never find you.
He knew the was fading away as every shape he had ever thrown fell at his feet.
It's over now the music of the night.