The Super Smash Brothers' Dating Show!

Ahh, welcome back, readers! I'm happy to say I have received all of . . . let's see here . . . 3 reviews! I'm happy w/ that. Even though I have about 40 hits and 3 reviews. Yes, I know, that may not seem much to you, but 40 hits are spiffindiculous to me. Yet, I must ask you to please review, people. Kudos to those 3 of you who did! I love you! Cookies for you!

Joeb : congrats, 1st reviewer! And thank you ever-so-much for the gold star. Its current residence is on my forehead. XD

Ickiakki : yes, I believe that this will get interesting, too. You have my word. And Mewtwo's here because, well, you'll find out. ;)

CrypticElf : thanks muchly. I do so hope that everyone will remember this!

Yes, that is it so far, readers. Just think; you could be written within this wonderful story! Permanently! Oh, the possibilities! (cough-cough)

Anyway. Now, back to the unfolding of this brouhaha! Yes, brouhaha is a word. Look it up. XD Onto . . .Chapter Two of : The SSBM Dating Show!

..:..

At Princess Peach's very large home . . . scratch that; very large castle . . .

"Dumm dee da dum . . .Toad!" The Princess of Pink called out into the extremely pink sitting room, one of many in the castle. On second thought, was it pink? Or crimson . . .? Oh, who cares. It was part of the pink family.

"Yes, Princess?" Toad answered back in his high, scratchy voice. He stopped his pacing, where he was contemplating the possible downsides of this whole, err, 'dating show' thing.

"Tonight's gonna be great! The lights! The camera! The action!" Peach started to giggle madly, causing her slightly flaky pink poodle to bounce out of her lap, and onto the floor.

"Meow."

"Oh, my poor Miss Huggles! While I'm out becoming a star, Toad, could you give her a bath tonight?" Peach put on her best 'Sobbing-Sally' face, filling her eyes with fake tears.

Slowly, the poor 2-foot tall mushroom thing nodded. He grimaced, looking over the psychotic pure-breed. He hated washing that . . . that . . . thing. Peach, oblivious to the mushroom man's distaste, went on.

"And all the people there, too! Heehee! Everyone around town will be talking about me! Yes! MEEE! MWAHAHAHA!" Along with her moronic laughter, she began rolling about the room, knocking over expensive vases and irreplaceable artwork. What a dumbass, no?

Toad coughed quietly from the opposite corner of the room. "Ahem . . . -cough- "

Peach, not even a tiny bit tired from her little outburst, looked over to him and her precious dog. Ruffling her skirt, she spoke. "Uhh, what?"

Toad roller his beady little eyes, motioning to the broken piles of art.

"Ohh. Heehee! Sorry, Toadie!" Turning her empty head, Peach looked up to the massive grandfather clock in the corridor. It, ironically, was given to her by an aunt. Not her grandpa. Weeiird. "Oh, what time is it . . . ? HOLY MUSHROOMS! I'm gonna be late! Toad! Get my limo out and ready! I'm gonna arrive in style!" Frantically, she hitched up her skirts and flew from the room, leaving Toad and Miss Huggles alone.

Tonight's gonna be one looong night . . .

"Meow."

The pudgy midget ran after the psychotic girl, Miss Huggles in tow, wheezing all the way. "But . . . (huff) Miss, they're (puff) g-going to do your (wheeze) makeup at the (cough) s-studio!" Choking out the words, he came to a sudden stop, dropping the poor animal. "Princess! C-come back!"

Her badgering giggles echoed down the hall. "I know, silly!" Her voice seemingly came out of nowhere. "But I need to look professional when I pull up! Now! TO THE GARAGE!" Loud footsteps clacked down the corridor.

"Alright!" Toad called after her, readying his Mushroom shaped phone. (Surprising, yes?) "Get the stretch out," he panted into it.

In a matter of seconds, her Retarded-ness scurried up to Toad, grabbed him by his stubbly little limb, and ran like a madman –or should I say, madwoman- out the large oak doors. Which, not so surprisingly, were painted pink.

A looong night, indeed . . .

oO0Oo

Back at the SSBM Broadcasting Building, otherwise codenamed 'rumpus in a bottle,' things weren't doing much better . . .

"Okay, guys," called out a nervous-beyond-belief Zelda, chewing her lip, "There's like, five minutes till seven, and where the heck is Peach!" Hastily she paced back and forth, stilettos leaving marks on the tiled floor. The expensive tiled floor. Need I say more?

"Link, get my cell-"

"You misplaced it in all of 25 minutes!" Link cut her off, giving her quite the glare.

"Umm, yes?"

"See, Zellie, I told you that her royal pain-in-the-ass wouldn't remember . . ."

"Link? Please don't call me that in front of people," Zelda stated quietly, a slight blush to her cheeks. With people chuckling in the background, of course. "WHAT?" Once again, she screeched, giving everyone the evil eye. Again. "Now Linky-Pie," she jeered, mocking him, "Will you please go find my cellular device?"

Sighing, Link hurriedly went on another little expedition to find the lost phone, while the rest of the studio scuttled back to work. And, once more, the place was not so ready to go.

Staff members sat lazily at their posts, you know, with the typical butt scratch or nose-pick. Ew.

"Will somebody please get me the fricking mafia!" Mewtwo, part of the production staff, ran through the large, modded-out glass doors, arms flailing about. "Those damn kids wrecked the good camera . . . AGAIN!" He motioned around, trying to get some staff to bring tools to the, errr, 'wreckage site,' while giggling and glass-breaking sounds echoed in the distance.

After the small, dramatic interruption, Dr. Mario (who had been watching the whole scene) coughed into his hand. "Uhh, Zelda," he murmured, still coughing, "is it-a your time-a of the month-a-"

Zelda, now completely embarrassed, (think tomato red . . .) spun around to face the pudgy man. "It is sooo not my, err, you know . . . And how dare you jump to conclusions! Just-just shut up!" she spat, mortification clearly visible on her face.

"So-a, I take-a that as a yes?"

Angered, she slapped him. Hard. On the face.

"No, Dr. Mario. Just, just no."

At that very moment, Link came rushing back with Zelda's phone in hand. And he saw Zelda's very red face. AND Dr. Mario's very red, hand-marked cheek.

"Uhh," he rattled out, half-panting, "Did I miss something?"

Choking out at the same time, the two spoke. "No." "Yes-a." Zelda looked back at the doctor, eyes glazed with hate.

"Yes." "No-a."

Link smirked, rolling his eyes. "Whatever. Here, your Highness, is your cell phone. Once again retrieved from Bowser's evil clutches." Waving the phone in front of her face, Link dropped it into her expectant hands.

"You did Lysol it, right?" Zelda asked, not very surprised.

"Yea, Zelda. Duh."

Bowser, as if on cue, yet again walked out into the main studio. "I'm sorry, guys! I can't help it!" And the studio noticed toilet paper stuck to his foot. His . . . wet . . . foot. Gross.

"Bowser," Zelda started, "How many times a day do you use the restroom?"

"Well, it depends, but mostly se-"

"That was a rhetorical question. Now, I'm calling our air headed friend." Hitting speed-dial, Zelda put the phone up to her ear. "SHH!"

Link grimaced. Turning to Luigi, who was conveniently sweeping next to him, he whispered, "It's gonna be a looong night."

oO0Oo

Peach, now hanging her head out the side of the limo, heard her positively pink phone ring from inside the car. Rushing to it, she opened it and answered. "'Yellow, this is Peach, unless I'm mistaken-"

Toad, who was supposed to be at home, grabbed the cell from her. "Uh hello?"

"Toad?" A feminine voice came through. "Toad? It's Zelda. Is Peach on her way?"

"As we speak," Toad sighed, eyeing the idiot, who was, at the moment, screaming incessantly at the driver.

"COME ON, YOU STUPID DRIVER! THIS LIMO CAN GET TO 100 MILES PER HOUR! OR MPH! WHATEVER YOU STANDARDS ARE! YOU'RE GOIN' 52! HELLOOO! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!"

"Alright, Toad, thanks. We'll see you soon. Hopefully."

oO0Oo

Back in the studio . . .

Zelda hung up the phone, eyes slightly rolling. "Yep, she's on her way. Get the makeup department ready . . . STAT!"

As the makeup artists scrambled to their posts, a loud boom was heard outside. Looking out the window from 11 stories up, Link twitched. A stretch limo, very pink, was on top of the sidewalk, with the front end smashed against a fire hydrant. "She's here . . ."

A giggly voice erupted from the hallway, followed by a perky Peach bouncing through the doorway. "Hola, guys! Let's get this partay started!" Beginning to dance, she shuffled about the room, almost breaking the equipment.

"Peach, dear! You're here! Come with me!" Zelda put on a false smile, along with a sickeningly sweet tone. Grabbing the other princess by the arm, she led the way to the makeup area.

Meanwhile, the rest of backstage was a wreck, complete with little fires and everything of the sort. Barely anyone helped pick up the mess. And, to top it all off, Peach was making quite the scene.

"HEY! DON'T BE PUTTING THAT STUFF ON MY FACE-" Some of the powder went into her large mouth, causing her to sputter. "-cough- Hey! That kinda looks like some of the stuff I found under my bed . . ."

Link, who had his head microphone on and ready, called out to everyone. "Hey! We're on in ten! HURRY UP BACK THERE!" The audience had already started to leak into their seats, causing the noise factor to jump from 100 percent to at least 110.

Zelda, pacing, looked out into the crowd. Kirby waddled up to her, smiling sadly. Makeup people were fixing her up last-minute, and the little pink ball spoke. "Hey Zelda?"

Zapping away an annoying powder artist, she nodded. "Yes?"

"Me thinks that this is madness . . ."

"It'll be great, Kirby, just you wait and see. We have Peach on tonight!" She called out to him, fake smile shining. Dismayed, Kirby shook his head. More like body. Because his head like, is his body, I guess . . .

"That's exactly why me thinks it is madness." Waddling away, he went back to his seat.

Zelda frowned. "Oh, great Goddesses, help me tonight . . ."

Backstage, Mewtwo put on his headset. "Everything ready?" he asked, calling out to Link.

"The stars are in place, besides Peach. Zel's onstage, Peach will walk on, the mystery guys are already behind their screens." Link looked out to the crowd, gulping.

"Whenever you're ready, Mewtwo . . ."

Sighing, the large cat-like thing motioned to the camera crew to start the countdown.

Great, he mused, floating to his spot, this is just peachy. Hah, peachy. Like peaches and cream. Or, like the blonde bimbo herself. Heh. I crack myself up.

Link, already behind the camera crew, signaled the start. "Five, four, three, two, one . . ."

!$&

Yay! Chapter two down! Woot! Go me! If it's too long, then boohoo for you. And now, for a small author's note. Like, an actual serious thing. Be shocked, fools.

A/N: Because of my 'dedication' to the marching band, (yes, I am a lowly freshman in color guard . . .) I have band camp from the 24th to the 30th. Next week. So, this will probably be my last update until then, but I'll probably work on the next chapter. Then, I'll post two the week I get back. Sound peachy? Hah. Peachy.

Wish me luck at death camp. Oops, I mean, band camp.

Until next time, readers! Please Review! You shall get cookies! Everyone loooves cookies! Or, any desert of your choosing. Just this once. I personally like ice cream . . .

R&R!

Signing off!