It was another day at MegaMan Jr. High.
MegaMan: Did anyone see Dino Boogie XVII: Dino Boogie Saves the First Day of School?
ElecMan: The classroom is empty, go to your next class!
MegaMan goes to his next class.
TurboMan: Students, it's time for driver's ed!
Zero: We're in our first year of Jr. High!
KI walks in.
KI: The laws applying to robots are different then ones applying to humans. Due to their programming a robots school eductaion and age have a much lighter effect on their ability to drive then on humans, therefore with the designs of these robots it is reasonable to teach them to drive at a much younger... oh, that's just a stupid, cliched excuse. A wizard did it!
TurboMan: In this class, we will teach you to drive. Driving is not easy and will take a long time to learn, but it is worth it. Soon you'll be able to drive to thye locations of this show instead of walking! Although everywhere on this show is on the same block... Anyway, it's driving time!
Cut to MegaMan behind the wheel of a skull tank.
TurboMan: Now don't worry, we're in a closed course. Nothing can go wrong. Now push the start button. It's that red button surrounded by the 7 identical looking "Blow up town" buttons.
MegaMan starts the skull tank.
TurboMan: Good job. Now, the most important thing in driving, what you need to remember to have any chance of surviving, is/
Wily: Okay, that's all the Driver's ed we can afford. Hand out the licenses and end the class!
TurboMan: But all I've done is show one student how to start a skull tank!
Wily: Do you have any idea how much it costs to rent a closed course?
TurboMan: 5 cents an hour?
Wily: Not quite that much, but still more then I'm willing to pay! Here, everyone gets a license, now go home!
And so MegaMan has learned to drive!
Act break.
Act 2:
MegaMan: Dad, I learned to drive!
Light: Big deal, I got a doomray license!
MegaMan: Can I borrow the skull tank?
Light: I see no reason why not, other then the fact that I haven't seen you drive, you don't have insurance, and that the skull tank means more to me then my family.
And so MegaMan goes out on a drive.
MegaMan: This is so exciting! Where should I drive to?
Roll: How about the movies?
MegaMan: I don't remember picking you up.
Roll: I was waiting in the car.
Zero: I was in the trunk.
Mechanic: I was changing the oil and lazers.
And so MegaMan drives to the movies.
MegaMan: Ooh, one of those new enclosed drive-ins!
MegaMan drives through the wall, smashing into the theatre and running over all the food and arcade machines.
Manager: How dare you come in here without a ticket!
So they don't get to see the movie. A skull tank pulls up next to MegaMan.
Bass: MegaMan, I challenge you to a drag race!
MegaMan: That doesn't sound safe.
Bass: It is safe!
MegaMan: Well, that's different.
MegaMan and Bass prepare for the race.
Bass: Whoever stops closest to that bottomless pit in the middle of the street wins!
Bass speeds towards it. He stops inches away.
Bass: Beat that!
MegaMan goes 1 mph towards it. He stops less then an inch away from it.
Bass: ARGH! Why didn't I specify the rules?
MegaMan: I won!
MegaMan begins the drive home. He bumps into the curve.
MegaMan: OH NO! There's a dent in the car! And Dad's told me every day since the show started that he'd become enraged over any small dent in his skull tank!
Roll: Maybe we can fix it.
Mechanic: We're not qualified to that ourselves! MegaMan, drive the car to a gas station and let the professionals handle it!
MegaMan: That's too risky, the car could get dented again! I need a safer way to fix the car. Hmmm...
Cut to MegaMan at a sign up booth.
MegaMan: I've just entered the Twisted Metal tournament!
Zero: Why did you say that just now?
Act break.
Act 3:
MegaMan: And luckily, the tournament is scheduled to end in time for me to get before Dad returns from work!
Calypso: I still don't know what last year's winner was thinking when he made that wish... Anyway, it is time for Twisted Metal! A tournment where cars fight to the death, even though they aren't alive, so the winner can have any wish his heart desires!
Sweet Tooth: You always mess up the wish!
Calypso: I might grant it if it's important enough.
Sweet Tooth: When's that ever happened?
Calypso: When I took the series away from 989.
KI: That joke proves I'm not afraid of offending anyone, even if it costs me every 989 fan on the GCN Social board.
Calypso: Drivers, get ready! Normally there are 12 contestants and a couple of hidden entrants and bosses, but we're already well into act 3 so let's just put three cars in. MegaMan's Skull Tank, Sweet Tooth, and the mystery driver!
The mystery driver's car has a huge KI painted on it.
Calypso: Let the battle begin!
MegaMan drives around looking for a powerup. But he gets cut off by another skull tank.
TurboMan: Stupid Wily, not willing to pay five cents to rent our own course...
The mystery car (henceforth known as KI) blows up Sweet Tooth.
Sweet Tooth: Good thing I switched to Geico...
MegaMan and KI face off.
MegaMan: It's time to use this car's special!
MegaMan pushes the wrong button and blows up Shelbyville. KI blasts the skull tank. It is badly damaged and out of the competition.
Calypso: KI is the winner!
MegaMan: Stupid egotistical writer, making himself the winner/
Kirby steps out of the car.
Kirby: I wish the car displayed my whole name instead of just the first two letters.
Calypso: Your wish is granted!
The car doesn't change.
Calypso: Kirby, your legal name is now KI.
Kirby: You jerk!
Kirby inhales Calypso.
Kirby: I now have his incredible power! I can do anything!
Kirby changes the writing on his car so it says Kirby and throws away the power.
MegaMan: I didn't win, I guess I'll just have to tell Dad the truth...
Cut to Light looking at the skull tank. It has many huge dents from explosions, the engine is destroyed, and the car is on fire.
Light: MegaMan, you're grounded for two weeks for that dent from when you hit the curve!
And so MegaMan learns to drive. Stay tuned for the next episode of MegaMan Jr. High!