I've done the damage, the damage is done
I pray to god that I'm the damaged one
And all these grown up complications
That you don't understand
I hope you can someday
I hope you can
---Little Digger, Liz Phair
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It was December 3 and Lilly and Veronica were in Veronica's living room making paper chains out of magazine pages for the Christmas tree and watching The OC.
"Seth is so cute." Veronica sighed as she glued the edges of a strip together.
"I don't know. I'm more of a Ryan girl. I like my boys bad."
"I could have told you that."
"Girls, your pizza's are here, and you've got a visitor." Keith said walking into the room with two large pizza's and Logan following behind.
"Hey Logan!" Lilly said throwing a magazine at him, "Help us decorate."
"Sure." Logan said taking a seat on the floor, "So, what are we watching?"
"The OC."
"Oh yeah, I watch that sometimes."
"No you don't!" Veronica exclaimed
"Yes I do. That's Ryan and Seth, and Ryan is in love with Marissa and Theresa and Seth is in love with Summer and Anna."
"I hardly think that either one of them are in love with any of the girls."
"Well, I think that watching you two argue over The OC is just really interesting but I'm gonna get something to drink. Want anything?"
"I'll have a soda." Logan told her.
"Water." Veronica said
As Lilly left the room Veronica turned to Logan.
"Why do I get the feeling that you're not here to talk about what's going on with Seth and Ryan?"
"I just wanted to see how you're doing."
"I'm dealing with everything."
"So, did Shelly invite you to the party?" Logan asked as he picked a piece of pizza out of the box.
"Yes, but the real question is whether or not I want to go."
"Are we talking about Shelly's party?" Lilly asked coming back into the room with the drinks, "Because Veronica says she's not going."
"I never said that I'm not going. I just said that I might night go. I haven't decided yet."
"This is the last big party of the year, you have to go! Come on Logan, back me up here. I mean you're going right?"
"I'm moving into my mom's place Sunday so I'm going to be packing, but I'm going to try and swing by for a little bit."
"You're moving in with your mom?" Veronica asked surprised
"Yeah, they just decided. That's the other reason I'm came over."
"That's awesome!"
The next morning sat in the kitchen eating breakfast and listening to her parent's fight in their room. Veronica wasn't surprised; it seemed to be happening more and more often lately. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. As she got up to see who it was she looked through her front window and spotted a yellow XTerra parked in the driveway.
"Hello Logan." She said smiling as she opened the door.
"Can we talk?"
"Sure, but can we go somewhere else?"
From upstairs her mother started yelling again.
"Sure. Yeah."
"Give me just a second."
Veronica shut the door and hurried upstairs to grab her bag and a few of her books and they ran outside.
"I'm ready." She said as she got into the car.
"Where do you want to go?" He asked.
"I don't care. Just not here. Or school."
"Alright, how about I show you my new digs?"
"Sounds good."
Logan pulled out of the driveway and about five minutes later he pulled into the driveway of a plain two story house.
"What do you think?"
"It's nice. Not as big as your dad's but it works." Veronica said as she got out, "And it's close to me. That's good."
"We can make late night visits back and forth."
"Are you excited about moving in?"
"I'm counting down the hours."
"I'm glad something's finally working out for you."
"I'm glad too." Logan said as he put his arm around her shoulder, "Now come on I'll give you the dollar tour."
He took her around the house, showing her the family room, the pool and Jacuzzi, and finally his room.
"You ready?" He asked as he took a hold of the door
"Yes!" Veronica told him
He slowly opened the door and revealed a large room with a light blue walls and a mattress sitting on the wooden floor.
"It's not quiet done yet." he told her.
"It going to look great."
They both walked in and took a seat on the mattress.
"So, how long have your parent's been fighting?" Logan asked as he pushed a strand of her long blonde hair behind her ear.
"To long." Veronica sighed, "But I'm okay with it. I know that there are just some things that I can't change."
"I'm sorry. I know that you wanted them to work it out."
"Let's change the subject okay?"
"Alright. Have you decided if you're going to Shelly's party?"
"Not yet. But Lilly is trying really hard to get me to go."
"You haven't exactly been 'Little Miss Social' since you got back. She wants to see you back to normal, it's not that strange."
"I know but couldn't we go bowling or have a sleepover and bake cookies and watch bad Johnny Depp movies at three in the morning like normal teenagers?"
Logan laughed and then asked, "So how are things going with you and Lilly?"
"They're okay. I mean, things were a little weird at first but its better now."
"That's good."
Logan started rubbing Veronica's arm and she began to smile.
"I missed this." she whispered
"Me too." Logan told her as he moved closer.
"It's almost like everything's the way it should be."
"Almost?"
Veronica looked into Logan's eyes, that were inches away from her face, pondering if what she wanted to do was the right thing or not.
"Almost." She repeated and then slowly began kissing him.
They both clung to each other, both knowing that this wasn't the right thing but at the same time, not wanting to stop.
"Why are we doing this?" Veronica whispered as she began to take Logan's shirt off.
"I have no idea." Logan told her as he began to unbutton her top.
Suddenly, as they both laid on the bed half naked and moments away from taking the biggest leap of their relationship, Veronica's cell phone began playing some highly annoying downloaded ring tone."Damnit." She whispered, pulling away.
"You should probably get that."
"Right." Veronica sat up and pulled her phone out of her pocket and answered it with a polite, "Hello?"
"Veronica where are you?" Lilly asked franticly
"Lilly what's wrong?"
"We had a seven A.M. pep squad meeting to discuss the booths for the New Years Carnival, one of which you are in charge of, and you're oh," Lilly paused and Veronica knew that she was dramatically checking her watch, "Ten minutes late."
"Oh my god Lilly I am so sorry!" Veronica said as she slid her shirt back on.
"Hurry up and get here. I'll try to cover for you."
"I'll be there as soon as I can."
"See you soon."
"Bye." Veronica hit end and looked at Logan
"Come on I'll take you." Logan said as he headed towards the door.
"Thanks." Veronica whispered.
The rest of the day Veronica could tell that Logan was going out of his way to ignore her, and she felt too embarrassed to confront him about it. After school Veronica stood in the court yard looking for Lilly when Meg came up to her.
"Hey." Meg said smiling
"Hi Meg, what's going on?"
"Not much. What's going on with you? I heard you were late for the pep squad meeting today.""My god!" Veronica exclaimed, "It's not that big of a deal. Why is everyone acting like they discovered WMD's in my locker?"
Meg looked at her friend sympathetically and frowned, "What's wrong."
"I feel like an idiot." Veronica told her feeling tears of rage and hurt fill her eyes.
"You want to talk about it?"
"Promise not to let anyone know about it? Especially Lilly."
"Cross my heart." Meg drew an X over her heart, "This must be really big news."
"It it. Come on."
Veronica pulled Meg to the flagpole and took a seat.
"I was kinda seeing someone."
"Really? Do I know him?"
"That doesn't matter. But we stopped, but we stayed friends and we just did friend things and there was nothing romantic between us...until today."
"Okay...what happened?"
"I almost had sex with him."
"You what!" Meg exclaimed so loud that several people stopped and looked at her.
"Shut up!" Veronica scolded her, and then lowered her voice, "Now he won't talk to me and I'm worried that I made a huge mistake and ruined one of the best friendship of my life."
"Have you thought of this new thing called talking to him about it? It's been through many clinical trials and 98 of the people tested say that they recommend that everyone try it."
Veronica faked a laugh and then told her, "Your sarcasm is not needed here, thank you."
Veronica spent that night thinking about what Meg had said and decided that she was right. She owed it to herself to confront him about it. So first thing Friday morning Veronica was on a mission to find him and talk about everything. It took her fifteen minutes but she finally found him in the parking lot flirting with Caitlin Ford.
"Veronica!" Meg called running up to her, "Did you take my advice and talk to your boy last night?"
Veronica didn't say anything and continued to stare and Logan, whose hand was resting comfortably on Caitlin's size two waist, trying to keep her tears from spilling out.
"Veronica, are you okay?" Meg asked placing a hand on her friend's shoulder.
Veronica stayed silent but looked over at Meg with her cheeks stained with tears.
"Oh honey." Meg whispered as she pulled a pair of sunglasses out of her Gucci purse, "Come on, let's get you cleaned up."
Meg took a hold of her friend's hand and led her inside to the closest bathroom.
"Come on." Meg whispered as she held the door open, "You okay?"
"Yeah." Veronica whispered as she took the glasses off and looked at her red, puffy eyes.
"You don't need him. You know what they say: Once a cheater always a cheater."
"Right."
"Veronica?" Lilly exclaimed as she burst into the bathroom, "What's wrong? I heard that you had a major breakdown in the parking lot. Is that true?"
"Great. My tears are being subject to school gossip, this is just great." Veronica cried as she clutched the sink.
"Veronica's parents are having troubles." Meg said as she handed Veronica a moist paper towel.
"Oh honey." Lilly said as she rubbed Veronica's back, "All parent's fight, there's nothing you can do about it."
"I know." Veronica sniffed giving Meg a 'thank you' look.
"Now, Veronica, you have a sickness, okay? And the only cure is ..."
"I'll go with you to Shelly's party. Alright?"
"You will not regret this!" Lilly exclaimed hugging her best friend.
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Please don't hate me to much for that ending because it will get better, I promise. Next Chapter, Shelly's Party.