Chapter 4: Raph 2

"He's been like that for a while," came a soft but sudden voice. Thinking that it was Raph, the two whirled around to fend off an attack and found dark eyes staring back at them.

Deciding that at least one turtle wasn't a killer or drunk, the two humans sat cautiously. "What do you mean?" Luke asked, wondering how his childhood heroes had gone to hell so quickly.

"It all began when he found out he was gonna be a cyber-Don, go insane or something like that: I don't know, I don't read comics." Leo took a sip from a mug of coffee and sighed. "Then he discovered FF.N, big mistake, and found that, when written, he was kidnapped, tortured, or injured in some type of fashion, so he tried to write one himself."

"And?" Smeg pushed, wanting more.

Leo sighed again. "He's still trying to finish it. So far he hasn't gotten passed chapter 5."

"What happened? Writing doesn't cause that."

"But Writers Block does." Leo confirmed. "You authors; when hyper you can create pieces of art, but when nothing is to be found you go insane and either find creative inspiration or . . ."

"End up like poor Donny." Smeg shook her head sadly. "In the corner of your own world with nothing but a bottle of sorrow and your dying soul. And I thought I was bad. To rid myself of the evil Block I simply put on depressing music or finish another fic. You Luke?"

"GameCube." Was his reply. "Or a shot of Vodka, either way, it rids of my problems."

"Sometimes writing can be evil." Leo murmured taking another sip of coffee. "Just don't go down that path. But judging by the reviews; I don't think you guys will."

"We only have seven." Luke replied happily.

"Actually only six, ones a flame, and a deep one at that." Smeg corrected. "But aside from in-jokes, can you tell us... what the hell is wrong with Raph?"

"World Vision." Was Leo's answer.

"Come again," Luke stuttered, wondering if he heard right.

"Er . . . what?" Smeg queried confusion evident on her face.

"Well, seeing as we don't have jobs and rely on money falling from lose pockets or holes in pants, we barely earn enough to have three pizza's a week." Leo explained as he poured himself another mug of coffee. "And to tell you the truth, Raph isn't as bad-assed-"

"evil -" Luke translated.

"- as those dark fanfictions make him out to be. So he decided to change his ways and image."

"You know, not to change the subject or anything," Smeg put in, "but you guys seem pretty comfortable with the fact that you're just figments of some guy's imagination."

"Eh," Leo shrugged. "You learn to live with it. So anyway, about Raph, he was looking to change his image so he sponsored some Cambodian kid through World Vision . . ." Leo trailed off as he saw the incredulous expressions on Luke and Smeg's faces.

"World Vision?" Smeg demanded sure it was some cruel jest.

"Yep," Leo responded. "World Vision. He's actually gotten kinda attached to the kid. He loves getting mail from the little guy, even has a finger painting framed and hanging on his wall."

"Doesn't explain the homicidal tendencies though." Luke reminded still anxious for an answer.

"Well, it all started with money problems,"

"Doesn't it always?" Smeg questioned.

Leo ignored her. "We couldn't really afford to sponsor him for a great deal of time, so Raph took to mugging. Then killing. Now that I think about it . . . we should have stoped him earlier. Personally, I think he's a bit too intensely concentrated on this kid. So he kills because he cares."

"You think?" Smeg replied angrily. "When he snuck up behind us I nearly shat myself!"

"Why are you watching our language?" Luke asked. "It's 'R' so swear away. Besides, with what kids watch on TV these days, You've got nothing to worry about. Why, back when I was a lad..."

"'Shat' sounds funnier. And Luke, you're 18, for Christ's sake."

"Whatever," Luke dismissed. "Hey, I'm hungry, and am craving something fruity."

"Yeah," Smeg sulked, looking depressed. "And Legolas isn't here!"

Luke ignored Smeg's comment and began rummaging through the cupboards looking for anything eatable that may have been lurking in the dark.

"BINGO!" came his triumphant cry a few minutes later. He reappeared from the fridge, holding a huge orange plastic seal-box. Opening it on the counter, Luke turned to Smeg and Leo.

"Leo, you want a banana?"

A look of terror crossed Leo's features.

Well, over two years in updating. WORLD RECORD! Expect it to be slower, but enjoy what we had laying around.

Please review.