Now Things Are Getting Confusing

"First I was a freaking unicorn, now this!" Logan grumbled, clearly not happy to inhabit Kitty's body. "This job does not pay enough!" The X-Men were looking through the upper levels of the house.

"What are you complaining about?" Kitty whined as she stumbled in Kurt's body. "At least you look normal and you don't have to trip over a stupid tail!"

"Oh that makes me feel so much better about myself," Kurt mocked. He was clearly happy to be in Doug's body. "I think out of all of you I'm the only one who made out on this deal!"

"Deal? Dude! I'm still a girl!" Bobby whined. He looked at Betsy's body. "But at least I'm dressed!"

"I don't know," Betsy admired Emma's body. "I quite like this outfit."

"You would," Rogue sighed, removing Remy's gloves. "Sorry Kurt I gotta do this." She yanked on Kitty's…well Kurt's tail.

"OW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?" Kitty snapped.

"Your whining, your insulting my brother, just being a general pain in the butt, take your pick!" Rogue snapped.

"That hurt you know?" Kitty rubbed her temporary tail.

"Oh I know," Kurt snickered. "Believe me I know."

"You could spank me next?" Remy grinned.

"Gross! Hello? You're like in her body!" Kitty told him.

"Giving a new meaning to the words touching oneself," Betsy said. Everyone looked at her. "Well someone had to say it!"

"Can't you control yourself for five minutes?" Rogue snapped at Remy. "I mean since you're a girl now shouldn't your hormones be under control?"

"Well at least you know his being a letch isn't just a guy thing!" Kitty said.

"No it's a Gambit thing," Scott grumbled. "Even with Jean's help I can still feel his thoughts!"

"Man so this is what it's like to be buff," Doug admired Logan's muscles. "Oh yeah! I could grow to like this!"

"Well don't!" Logan snarled. "And stop showing off like that! You're making me look ridiculous!"

"Will all of you calm down?" Scott moaned as he put his hands on his head. Well, Jean's hands on his temporary head. "I can't concentrate."

"Well at least you can see in color," Jean decided to look on the bright side as she was currently stuck in Scott's body. "So this is what you see every day huh?"

"Yeah I'd almost forgotten what colors were like," Scott admitted. "Ow…My head! Bobby, Gambit control yourselves and think about the mission!"

"Let me help you," Jean focused. "It seems I still have my telepathic abilities."

"So do I but for obvious reasons," Betsy remarked. "We can help the boys….Er, girls…uh…Help them adjust."

"I don't think I am ever going to adjust to these," Bobby pointed to Betsy's breasts, which were rather ample. "How do you keep your balance being so top heavy?"

"Just keep your hands away from the area and you'll live to walk period!" Betsy warned him.

"Yeah like I didn't touch Emma's body," Bobby grumbled.

"Ewww…Gross!" Kitty winced.

"Oh come on, give me a break!" Bobby snapped. "Like I'd blow that opportunity!"

"I've heard of getting into some girl's pants but this is ridiculous…" Scott muttered. "No offense."

"None taken," Jean said. "This is weird enough for all of us. We gotta go catch Switch!"

"Totally!" Kitty whined. "I don't know how much more I can take having all this fur! OW! ROGUE!"

"Ow!" Doug rubbed his hands. "Did you know your claws hurt when they come out?"

"Yes, I am quite aware of that," Logan groaned.

"Well they are pretty pointy," Bobby said. "I guess they would hurt."

"It doesn't hurt that much. You get used to it," Logan said. "Now can we please try to keep it together? I can't use my senses like I could in my old body so can anyone figure out if anyone else is up ahead? Cypher?"

"Uh…"Doug began to say. Suddenly there was a loud sound and an explosion.

"DAMN YOU TO HELL SWITCH!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!"

"I think they're that way," Doug pointed.

"Yeah great work kid," Logan sighed.

"It sound's like they're fighting…Each other," Scott blinked. "You don't think…?"

"GANGWAY! HEEEELLLLLLPPPP!" Jetstream blew by them and collided with a wall. Due to the nature of his powers, he wasn't killed but was rather dazed. "Owie…"

"Okay Bub!" Logan grabbed Jetstream by the collar. "Where's Switch?"

"How should I know? I don't even have my cards!" Jetstream snapped.

"Cards?" Doug asked. "Tarot is that you?"

"Yeah…Wait…" Tarot looked at them. "Did Switch come through here?"

"Oh yeah," Logan grumbled. "Definitely."

"I hate her!" Tarot snapped. "Thinks it's funny to use her powers on us!"

"Something tells me we should talk to the Hellions," Scott said. They went up further but were nearly skewered by several spikes. "DUCK!"

"How Catseye stop these things?" Evan screamed as 'his' spikes went out of control.

"X-MEN! GET THEM! AGGHHHHHH!" Bevatron screamed as his electricity went out of control. "Bevatron how do you control this?"

"You're so damn superior Monet, figure it out!" Bevatron snapped. He was in Roulette's body.

"Oh no you…" Kitty ran to phase but accidentally triggered the teleportation abilities. She landed on Beef. "Oops!"

"AHHHHHHH!" Beef waved his arms around and started screaming. Soon all the mutants tried to attack each other but since they were not experienced with each other's powers they kept blowing up the objects in the room instead.

"Hold it!" Scott shouted. Everyone stopped fighting. "Spyke?"

"Here!" Evan held up a furry paw. He was now in Catseye's body, which was in a half lion form. "I am going to kill Switch!"

"I knew she'd screw this up!" Bevatron moaned. "I'm a freaking chick!"

"You have my deepest sympathy," Bobby said sarcastically.

"I am going to need a shower so bad when all of this is over," Roulette moaned. She was in Beef's body.

"If you haven't figured it out by now, Switch is about as stable as Jell-O in a blender," Evan grumbled. "How about a truce? At least until we all get back to our own bodies!"

"Fine with me," Logan grunted.

"How do we make her do that?" Kitty asked.

"Oh Ms. Frost will make her do it," Catseye said. "That we know!"

Warpath ran in and grabbed Jean from behind. "Did you really think I'd be out that long One-Eye?"

"GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY GIRLFRIEND!" Scott shouted as he used his temporary telekinesis to try and fling Warpath off.

"Girlfriend? Hey put us down!" Both Warpath and Jean were being levitated.

"Oh you guys are so funny!" Switch laughed as she walked in with a camera. "Now this is…"

"YOU!" Scott lost his concentration and knocked both Jean and Warpath into her. Switch was so startled she let loose her powers again right before she was knocked unconscious into the wall. A huge pink ball of energy engulfed the entire room.

"Not again!" Bobby screamed.

Suddenly whomever inhabited Evan's body accidentally let loose several fire spikes which imbedded into the wall. Immediately the building caught fire. "Let's get out of here!" Someone who sounded like Remy screamed. No one argued.

The mutants made a mad scramble for the outside. As soon as they got out the entire building caught on fire. "Great this is the second building you guys set on fire today!" Doug snapped. He was in Jean's body. "Oh man…"

"Keep this up Evan and like you'll break the Misfits' record," Kitty said. She was in Scott's body. "Cool! Everything is like red!"

"This time I didn't do it!" Evan shouted. He was in Tarot's body. "Whichever idiot was inhabiting my body at the time did it!"

"I am not an idiot!" The person inhabiting Evan's body shouted.

"That's you isn't it Bobby?" Betsy glared at him. She was in Bevatron's body.

"Yeah," Bobby admitted. "But at least I'm the right gender again!"

"Oh sure, rub it in," Kurt groaned. Now he was in Emma's body and carrying Switch.

"Catseye very confused now…" She mewed. She was in Beef's body.

"Tell me about it…" Beef grunted. He was now in Catseye's body.

"AND I'M STILL KITTY!" Logan roared. "HOW COME I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDN'T CHANGE?"

"That's it, we're all going back to the mansion!" Scott threw up his hands. He then noticed that he was in Rogue's body. "This really sucks!"

"Ha!" Remy laughed. He was in Kurt's body. "Rogue where are you? It's me! Remy!"

"Oh yeah like I'm gonna kiss you while you're in my brother's body!" Rogue snapped. Rogue was in Logan's body now.

"Uh…" Remy looked at the situation. "Maybe you have a point."

"Charles," Logan grunted into his communicator. "We have a problem! A big one!"

"Kitty? What's wrong?" Xavier spoke into his communicator back at the mansion.

"First of all, I'm not Kitty even though I sound like her," Logan groaned. "Just get Frosty ready to convince Miss Mix and Match to do her thing!"

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Twenty minutes and several threats later back at the Institute…

"Fine that's the last one," Switch grumbled as she finished her work. "Now is everybody back where they belong?"

"Oh yes! Thank you God!" Bobby sobbed as he hugged his own body. "Stomachache or not there's no place like home!"

"Switch you and I are going to have a very long talk when we get back," Emma glared at Switch.

"If you get back, you mean," Scott glared at her.

"No, let them go Scott," Xavier told him. "I think we've all had enough."

"Let's call this a draw for now," Emma said. "But remember Cypher, we will be back! You cannot hide from the Inner Circle forever. And when that day comes, you will return to us."

"Yeah and we'll kick your butt again like we did this time!" Rogue shouted as they left.

"Don't be too enthusiastic about it," Remy grumbled. "Remy going to have nightmares for months!"

"I think we've all got some scars to deal with after this nightmare," Scott groaned.

"This never would have happened if I hadn't come here," Doug shook his head.

"Don't worry about it. Like we don't have a bazillion other people after us already," Kitty said to him.

"I think she's gonna be back sooner than we thought," Jean pointed to something on the floor. Lockheed was bouncing up and down and screaming in tones that sounded vaguely human.

"Bevatron's in there!" Betsy said.

"EMMA!" Xavier shouted.

Emma returned to the room, dragging Switch by the ear. "I know! I know!" Bevatron came bounding back into the room on all fours, barking and panting. "The last thing I want is that stupid dragon in my student's body! Although I must admit the temperament is an improvement."

Next: Gee I don't know what's next. But won't it be fun to find out? Oh wait, I have an idea…He he…I am so insane.