So Much For Good Publicity
"I knew this was going to be a disaster…" Scott moaned as he walked down the hall with Jean. "We're just lucky all Penance did was slash Glory's outfit! Not to mention somehow she got into all her other 12 cases of clothes she brought with her!"
"Scott just put up with her," Jean sighed. "I don't sense any hostility in her mind. In fact I don't really sense anything in her mind but that's beside the point. We need all the good publicity we can get."
"You call that good publicity?" Scott asked.
"So her writing isn't exactly what we wanted but her magazine is read by a lot of people!" Jean reasoned.
"Yeah people who don't exactly think for themselves!" Scott snapped.
"Don't you think you're being a little harsh?" Jean said.
"You can't seriously tell me anyone wears these?" Glory whined as she walked out in a large trainee X-Men uniform. Kitty, Tabitha, Rogue and Betsy were with her. "I mean I don't know if any of these even qualify as fashion!"
"Then again…You may have a point," Jean sighed.
"I can't believe all my designer outfits are all trashed!" Glory whined.
"Oh well those outfits were getting kind of retro anyway if you know what I mean," Tabitha shrugged.
"What?" Glory blinked.
"Well I didn't want to say anything…" Tabitha whistled. "But I think I saw a few outfits that were once on the Golden Girls."
"No they weren't!" Betsy grinned. "They were on Kathie Lee Gifford."
"Ahhh!" Glory winced in agony. "On the other hand, this outfit does make my body look good. So what exactly do mutants do around here?"
"Well…" Scott began. A wicked thought crossed through Scott's mind. A thought of him performing a level nine Danger Room simulation with Glory running for her life, screaming as explosions were all around her.
"We have classes," Jean obviously picked up the thought. "Basically they're a lot like any other school." She opened the door to one classroom. Then she saw Bobby throwing snowballs. Several other mutants were using their powers fooling around. To her horror Ben and Hank were ignoring the madness because they were fighting between themselves.
"Yankees!" Ben snapped.
"Red Sox!" Hank snapped back.
"Yankees!"
"Red Sox!"
Jean quickly shut the door to the classroom before Glory could look in. "Uh…Study hall. Completely boring. Let's…check out the arboretum, shall we?"
Jean quickly steered Glory around and they went to the arboretum. They found Ororo tending to her plants using her powers. Tiny rainstorms were watering the plants. "Hello there," Ororo smiled warmly.
"Woah," Glory was impressed. "How are you doing that?"
"I have the ability to manipulate the weather," Ororo explained. "I can use my powers on a localized scale with just enough concentration."
"So like say you're getting ready to do a fashion shoot and all of the sudden it starts to rain," Glory thought. "You can like just make it all sunny again?"
"Well yes," Ororo said.
"So you can make it rain or snow or just about anything?" Glory asked. "Boy I could have used that power on a few dates! Like the time I went out with Ratt Mace, the lead rock star for the group Bloody Tongues. Ugh, what a disaster! Certainly he had the tongue part right but you would think a guy like that would know how to use it! Especially when…"
"You know why don't you two have a nice talk?" Scott interrupted. "And the rest of us will go…See if there's a class available for Glory to sit in on? Right guys?"
"Yeah! Right! We'll go now!" Most of the girls said. Rogue dragged Kitty away as the small group left the arboretum.
"That was close…" Betsy groaned. "If I had to listen to one more bloody story from her I would have given her nightmares for a month!"
"Sounds like justice to me. I'm already going to have nightmares for a month!" Rogue said. "Where's the Professor when you really need him to fix someone's brain?"
"She has a brain?" Scott joked.
"She is not that bad!" Kitty defended.
"Yes she is," Tabitha said. "So where is Professor X?"
"He took off with Warren to have more talks in Washington," Scott told her. "Congress and the Senate are still trying to figure out what to do with us."
"Yes so it's important that we make a good impression on her," Jean said. "Maybe she'll write a good article about us and maybe it will take some of the pressure off us. So please whatever you do let's keep our cool and not make any kind of scene! The last thing we need right now is to give the press another unflattering picture of mutants."
"Hey guys! Guess what?" Jamie ran up to them holding something.
"Jamie what are you doing out of class?" Scott asked.
"It was getting too loud in there," Jamie said.
"Yeah I figured that," Jean sighed.
"Take a look at this!" Jamie held up a notebook. "These are the notes Glory dictated to her secretary, before she got here!"
"What?" Jean took it and began to read it. "How did you get this?"
"It's real easy to bribe her people," Jamie said. "She's not a very nice boss."
"And a lousy backstabbing…" Kitty managed to read the notebook as well. "The mutants were thrilled that someone as glamorous as I was able to visit them. Despite their tragic condition these lonely misfits were eager to learn what I was able to teach them. What the hell is this?"
"Boy if Kitty's swearing it must be bad," Tabitha looked at the document. "And it is."
"This is nothing more than an ad saying how wonderful Glory the Magnificent is," Betsy was angry. "How she graced herself with her presence at the Institute."
"She never intended to write about us at all," Scott was furious. "It think it's time we had a serious talk with her!"
"AAAAIIIEEEEEEEE!"
"I think Lockheed is already having words with her," Betsy noticed someone running down the hallway towards them.
"Get it away! Get it away!" Glory screamed as Lockheed chased her.
"Oh don't be such a weenie!" Tabitha called out. "He's not even using his fire!"
"I guess we should help her, if only to find out the truth," Betsy sighed as they ran after them.
"Lockheed! Don't set her on fire! At least not yet!" Kitty got her dragon to stop.
"What is that horrible thing?" Glory gasped. Lockheed stuck his tongue out at her.
"Look who's talking!" Rogue said.
"Give it up girl! We know all about your article!" Betsy snapped.
"Yeah it's all here in black and white!" Tabitha showed her the notebook. "Or in this case purple glitter and white."
"So much for being open and honest," Kitty fumed. "I would say you wrote this before you got here, but that would imply you actually did some work!"
"Hey! I gave my secretary…What's her name? My opinions and thoughts! It's her job to transcribe them," Glory sniffed. "And what do you mean complaining about all this?"
"What do you mean?" Rogue said. "I mean you say that you're only trying to spread the truth but the only thing you're spreading is fertilizer!"
"Hey I could write a lot worse about you," Glory said. "Think about it. There are a lot of people out there who listen to what I have to say. I tell them what's hot and what's not. I tell them if they're too fat or badly dressed or if their hair isn't the right color."
"And you make money off of that," Jean was fuming. "You pressure people…Mostly young people into thinking what they should buy with their money or how they look and if they don't conform exactly to your standards they're worthless!"
"Let's not get so melodramatic about that," Glory waved. "It's not like I'm the only one doing it. Hey, even your Professor's got an angle. I mean come on! You can't tell me a guy with psychic powers wouldn't use that to his advantage. I mean look at this place! The money has to come from somewhere! Okay I'll admit this whole new species idea is a new angle. And peace and love and brotherhood and all that crap never really goes out of style but come on! The only difference between you and all the other freaks of nature out there is that you've got some sense of style and a much more profitable marketing strategy."
"I can't believe what I'm hearing!" Jean gasped. "You should be using your influence for good!"
"I am, my own good," Glory told her. "What's wrong with that?"
By now they had attracted the attention of all the other students as well as the teachers. They watched as Jean tore into Glory. "What's wrong is that you're twisting the minds of everyone who reads your magazine! Don't kids have enough problems without some forty year old teenage wannabe shoving her opinions on how they should look and act and making a profit off of it!"
"How did you…Did you read my mind?" Glory fumed.
"No, I read the lines on your face!" Jean snapped.
"Way to go Jean!" Ray hollered. "Did I really just say that?"
"And I'm saying this! I knew this was a mistake hanging around this freak show! No amount of publicity is worth this!" Glory snapped as she turned around.
Then she slipped and fell straight onto her butt and slid all the way down the hall. Bobby snickered as Glory traveled the small ice pathway he was creating. "AAHHHH!" Glory screamed as she headed straight for the door.
"I know I shouldn't but I can't resist," Jean sighed as she telekinetically opened the doors, letting Glory fly out and land in a puddle of mud on the front lawn. The very same front lawn a horde of reporters and photographers were watching from the front gate and snapped several pictures.
"What's going on?" Logan asked as he ran out with the rest of the students.
"I believe her Royal Highness is leaving," Ben grinned as he folded his arms.
"Glory!" Johnny ran up to help her. "Here let me…"
"Get your hands off me you freak!" Glory snapped as Johnny helped her up.
"Fine…" He dropped her back into the mud puddle.
"JOHNNY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
"Reed?" Johnny said. A large black car was parked in the driveway. They could see Reed Richards sticking his head out.
"What are you doing here?" Ben asked.
"Johnny, Ben…" Reed sighed as he got out of the car first. "What's going on?"
"Just taking out the trash," Scott waved. "You're Reed Richards right? From the Fantastic Four."
"Yes I…" Reed began.
"What the hell are all these reporters doing here!" A man with brown hair and glasses wearing a well-made suit got out of the car. "Richards! You assured me there would be no bad publicity about this!"
"The hell there won't be! I'll sue! I'll sue you all!" Glory screeched.
"Who's this guy?" Logan asked.
"Dick Beacon. He's from the mayor of New York's office," Ben said. "A real big wig. What's he doing here?"
"What am I doing here?" Beacon snapped as he stormed up to them. "What are you doing here in a place like this? That's what I wanna know!"
"I'm afraid we have a slight problem," Reed sighed. "It concerns you and Johnny being here."
"The only reason we tolerate the Fantastic Four is that you are not mutants," Beacon said. "Your presence at this school seriously tarnishes your image!"
"When I informed Mr. Beacon and some other government officials about your schooling plans…" Reed sighed. "They…disagreed."
"You're damn right we disagree!" Beacon said. "Cosmic radiation is one thing. But mutants? No, we have enough problems with your kind without adding to them!"
"Now just a damn minute…" Logan unsheathed his claws and pointed them at Beacon. Beacon screamed and took a step backwards. He accidentally bumped into Glory who was trying to get up again and fell back into the mud with Beacon on top.
"Boy you go away for a few days and everything goes to pot," Fred remarked as he and several Misfits suddenly appeared from around the corner.
"Now what?" Scott groaned. "How did you get here? You didn't…."
"We used the big helicopter this time," Lance pointed. Sure enough a GI Joe helicopter was on the side of the Institute on the baseball field. "To keep a low profile."
"You call that a low profile?" Ben asked.
"How come we didn't hear it landing?" Rogue asked.
"Who could hear anything with that woman screaming like a banshee?" Logan pointed to a still screaming Glory who was now throwing mud at Beacon.
"I thought you guys weren't going to show up?" Rogue asked.
"Well…" Althea said. "You see…" Suddenly two police cars and three black sedans pulled up at the front gates.
A FBI agent walked out of one of the cars. "Gloria Raddachino? AKA Glory?" He said.
"Yes…" Glory sniffed.
"You're under arrest for conspiracy, tax evasion and possible treason," He took out his handcuffs.
"WHAT?" Glory screamed as he cuffed her. "Take these handcuffs off me! This is ridiculous!"
"Uh, no it isn't," Althea said. "We know who financed your house in Aspen."
"YOU'RE ALL GOING TO HEAR FROM MY LAWYERS ABOUT THIS!" Glory screamed as she was being dragged away by two police officers. "I'LL SUE!"
"Yeah, like you're the first," Rogue waved as she was led away.
"GLORY! GLORY!" The paparazzi were flashing as many pictures as they could from behind the gates. "Hey! It's the Fantastic Four! Johnny! Mr. Richards! Are you secretly funding the mutants?"
"Oh god no the press!" Beacon shouted. "No comment! Richards!"
"Uh, Ben, Johnny I think we have to go now…" Red gulped.
"What about our stuff?" Ben asked.
"What stuff? Mine got trashed!" Johnny snapped. "Let me out of this dump!"
"Who are you calling our place a dump?" Bobby snarled.
"I am!" Johnny got into his face. "And good riddance!"
"Yeah to you!" Bobby snapped.
"Will someone please tell me what the hell is going on?" Scott shouted. "I thought you Misfits weren't going to come over? You guys are supposed to be in training!"
"Well you see our training got a little interrupted," Lance scratched his head. "We got called in right away to do a mission."
"It seems Glory has some very interesting backers," Althea explained. "Namely Cobra. We just raided her front office an hour ago and got a lot of evidence."
"Not to mention a lot of lip gloss," Xi blinked as he displayed some. "I like the chocolate chip cookie flavored ones."
"Naturally since it was a Cobra thing the Feds wanted our assistance and we were happy to help," Wanda continued.
"Not to mention help ourselves to some neat eye shadow!" Arcade showed them. "Look at what Xi's wearing! Isn't that his color?"
Lance looked at the two of them. "Guys we really need to have a serious talk once we get back home."
"AGGGHHH!" Johnny was suddenly thrown backwards by a blast of snow. "THAT'S IT! FLAME ON!" The next thing anyone knew, Bobby and Johnny were having a full-blown snow and fire war in the front yard.
"DRAKE!" Scott shouted as he ducked for cover. "KNOCK IT OFF!"
"So much for hoping the matchstick would mature in this place," Ben grumbled.
"We are leaving right now!" Beacon hopped up and down. "STOP FIGHTING! THE PRESS IS TAKING PICTURES OF ALL THIS!"
"Gee I wonder if there's gonna be anything interesting on the news tonight?" Rogue asked sarcastically.
"You mean besides Glory getting arrested as well as Iceman and the Human Torch having a brawl on your front lawn?" Xi asked innocently.
"Yeah, Xi…" Rogue winced. "Besides that."
"How about that Beacon guy getting hit with a snowball?" Angelica pointed.
FOOM!
"Not half as interesting as one of Johnny's flames setting that media truck on fire," Betsy blinked.
"And to think Grim, you're gonna give all this up!" Logan remarked.
"Yeah," Ben sighed. "Stretch and I will take the Matchstick. You and your guys get the Snowball."
"Good plan…Jean…" Logan sighed as they instructors and Fantastic Four went to quell the riot. Ororo used her powers to make it rain to stop the fire. The rest of the X-Men and Misfits watched the pandemonium.
"So much for good publicity…" Scott moaned.
"On the plus side Glory's magazine got shut down for good and Johnny Boy is going home," Rogue said. "So it's not a total loss."
"Yeah and we shut them both down right on national TV," Scott groaned.
"Sorry Scott, I guess we did screw this up for you after all," Angelica apologized.
"ICEMAN! KNOCK IT OFF!" Logan roared. "YOU NEARLY FROZE ONE OF THE REPORTERS OUT THERE!"
"Actually guys," Scott sighed. "Why don't we call this one a draw?"
Next: Let's check in and see how some of our favorite villains are doing? Maybe now we can get the plot moving in some kind of direction.