Now The Fun Begins
"GET THESE COCKROACHES OUT OF MY CEREAL!" Mystique screamed. She was at the kitchen table with Todd, Lance, Pietro, Fred and Roadblock. She was not having a good first morning at the aptly named Misfit Manor.
"Actually they're grasshoppers," Todd pointed out. "Full of yummy protein!"
"Yeah we thought all pregnant women had weird cravings," Pietro chuckled.
"Weird! Not psychotic!" Mystique threw the cereal at the wall.
"With you it's the same thing," Lance commented.
"Awww, Mystique made a mess," Fred mused. "Now you have to clean it up!"
"Listen you degenerates…" Mystique hissed. "Don't think I don't know what you're doing! I knew that you'd try to rattle me with your childish petty antics even before I stepped through this door to Hell. Go ahead and enjoy your pathetic revenge while you can."
"Thank you," Pietro interrupted. "We will."
"Well you're not going to break me!" Mystique slammed her fist on the table. "All your stupid little tricks…Calling me Shamu… Posting those lovely drawings of my head exploding all over the walls…Playing the theme music to 'Rosemary's Baby' while I'm trying to sleep…Stuffing three-day-old Limburger cheese in my closet…Well that last one backfired! I ate it all! All three pounds of it! HA! SO WHO'S CRAZY NOW HUH? SURE I HAD A BOWEL MOVEMENT FOR FOUR HOURS BUT IT WAS WORTH IT! HA!"
"Yeah, we sure underestimated you," Lance smirked.
"If you think that I'm going to…" Mystique took a sip from her tea and stopped. There was a cockroach swimming in it. "AAAHHH!"
"Oops," Todd grinned. "How clumsy of me. I must have dropped a live one in there while I was cooking up the others."
"I am going to be sick!" Mystique held her hand over her mouth and stumbled into the nearest bathroom. "AAGGGHH! WHO FILLED IT UP WITH SHAVING CREAM? ARE THOSE SNAKES? AAAAHHHHH!"
"Who did that?" Lance asked.
"Wasn't me," Pietro looked at Todd.
"Not me either," Todd said.
"Well," Roadblock whistled. "I guess I must have had a little 'accident'."
"So did Mystique…" Wanda snickered as she walked in with Arcade. Arcade was using his portable laptop.
"I'LL GET YOU ALL FOR THIS! I SWEAR IF IT'S THE LAST THING I'LL DO…WHAT IS THAT SMELL?"
Low Light walked in. "Okay who forgot to clean the diaper bin?"
"Forgot is a subjective term," Roadblock grinned. "You kids aren't the only ones who wanna see Mystique squirm."
"So what's new, besides Mystique having a freak out in our bathroom?" Low Light asked. "What are you looking at Arcade?"
"Oh just blogs and other news websites chronicling how the Misfits and the X-Men took down Glory and all the other scandals going on," Arcade said. "Comments about Kitty's little family scandal, our links with the Fantastic Four…All that stuff."
"Do people hate us for busting Glory?" Wanda asked.
"Well that's a funny story…" Arcade said. "According to their web site the I Hate Glory Club thinks we're heroes. But for some reason all the Glory supporters are blaming the X-Men! Not us. Weird."
"Well ain't that a kick in the head?" Todd chuckled.
"It's not funny Toad," Low Light said. "Things are really getting ugly at the Institute."
"GET THEM OFF! GET THEM OFF!" Mystique tried to run away from several bats chasing her.
"But they just want to be your friends!" Daria called out after her.
"Yeah from one fellow bloodsucker to another," Quinn said.
"Actually those bats don't suck blood," Brittany said. "They just like blueberries a lot and…"
"YEOW! THEY'RE BITING ME! SOMEBODY GET ME OUT OF THIS NUTHOUSE!" Mystique screamed.
"Things are pretty ugly around here too," Todd grinned.
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"Every time I think that our lives can not get any more like a freaking soap opera…" Ray grumbled as he looked out the window. "Is it me or are there even more reporters out there than there were an hour ago?"
"Get away from the window, Ray," Sam sighed as he slumped into a chair in the living room. Several X-Men were lounging about being very depressed.
"Or what? They're gonna throw a camera at me?" Ray asked sarcastically.
"No, but they could take pictures of you," Sam snapped. "Besides I'm sick of hearing about it!"
"You're sick about it?" Kitty glared at Sam. "Hello! I'm the one stuck in the middle of this!"
"It's not just you!" Bobby snapped. "There are people still buzzing about Glory's arrest! Even though that's the Misfits' fault!"
"Yeah Bobby," Kitty rolled her eyes. "The Misfits made Glory slip and fall on a patch of ice and slide into a mud puddle in front of everyone!"
"Well I'm not the one who invited her here in the first place!" Bobby shouted. He glared at Kitty. "You just had to enter another contest didn't you?"
"Hey that's right," Ray said. "This is all her fault."
"Thanks a lot!" Kitty shouted. "That really makes me feel better!"
"Well it's true!" Ray shouted back. "You do cause more than your share of drama around here!"
"I do not!" Kitty defended.
"Yeah she's not that bad," Kurt said.
"Hey!" Kitty looked at him.
"Oh yeah?" Amara spoke up. "What about that last contest you entered and won last year? Remember that?"
"How about all the times you got tickets for your driving whenever Logan or Scott tried to give you lessons on the highway?" Bobby added. "Not to mention a few accidents!"
"If you want to talk about accidents, don't forget her cooking," Jamie added.
"Kitty's cooking is the least of it," Sam mentioned. "Let's not forget the granddaddy of 'em all. That crazy on again, off again love triangle between Avalanche and Colossus! Think about how many times fights have broken out or stuff gets broken or we wake up in the middle of the night with all that insanity going on!"
"You're right, that is the worst," Ray thought.
"Oh it is so nice to know that I can count on my friends!" Kitty stood up angrily.
"Well it's not our fault you're a walking disaster!" Ray shouted.
"Ray Crisp you are a dead man!" Kitty screamed and tackled him.
"Should we stop this?" Amara asked.
"Are you crazy? This is the most fun I've had in days!" Sam told her.
"All right knock it off you two!" Scott shouted as he and Jean ran in. They both separated the two combatants. "Save it for the Danger Room which is where you'll be spending a lot more time for a while!"
"Good!" Ray shouted. "Maybe then Kitty can actually do something other than ruin our lives!"
"That was way out of line Crisp!" Kurt snapped.
"You wanna do something about it Fuzzy?" Ray said.
"Oh I will do a lot of things!" Kurt made a fist.
"We can take him Kurt!" Kitty shouted.
"Not if I turn him into a block of ice first!" Bobby said.
"For what?" Ray shouted.
"For getting on my nerves!" Bobby snapped.
"You get on all of our nerves more than he does!" Amara snapped.
"Oh you wanna piece of me?" Bobby asked.
"KNOCK IT OFF!" Jean shouted. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU?"
"Besides the fact that we have reporters and protestors at our door, the media is having a field day with us, there are new lawsuits every day and on top of it we gotta deal with Mystique in our lives?" Rogue grumbled as she walked in. "Not much."
"Sorry Jean…" Kurt backed down. "What we have is a serious case of cabin fever."
"Yeah this whole thing has got us all on edge," Ray grumbled. "Sorry Kitty. Didn't mean to say most of this is your fault. Even though it is."
"All right you are so dead…" Kitty made a fist and began to charge at Ray.
Jean used her telekinesis to hold her back. "Ray get up to your room! Right now before I change my mind and let her go!" Ray ran off. "Kitty calm down."
"Calm down? How can I calm down when he's right!" Kitty began to sniffle. Jean released her and she flung herself on the sofa.
"He is not right," Scott told her. "Stryker's the one who exposed your family and Jesse D. Your parents' love lives are their own business. You didn't chase off the Fantastic Four and as for Glory…." He stopped for a moment. "Well maybe you're partially to blame for that."
"Thanks a lot!" Kitty snapped and ran up to her room.
"That didn't help did it?" Scott winced.
"No, you think? Maybe we shouldn't have cancelled classes?" Jean sighed.
"Jean not even the Professor can think straight at a time like this," Scott told her. "He and the other adults are too busy handling the possible lawsuits and the press. And the rest of us are just as distracted."
"Distracted? Every time we try to read a book or go to sleep we can hear the news helicopters circling around!" Sam said. "And forget about watching TV! It's either us or some kind of anti-mutant rally going on!"
"It took all my strength to stop Logan from turning a hose on the reporters outside," Jean told them. "Unfortunately Kitty's mom got by me."
"Never thought I'd ever say this," Jamie sighed. "I don't wanna watch TV anymore."
"That is bad," Kurt admitted.
"Yeah and things aren't getting much better," Scott sighed. "You might as well know about this too. Doug was talking to the teaching staff about some of the stuff that went on with the Hellions. Evan was involved in a lot of heavy stuff. He helped massacre an entire building full of FOH supporters."
"Well that explains the sudden thunderstorm this afternoon," Sam whistled. "Ororo must be really feeling low huh?"
"We are all on edge and a little frayed," Hank walked in carrying a group of papers, which he set down on a table.
"More hate mail Beast?" Bobby asked.
"To be fair not all our correspondence is in the category of litigation and/or hate mail," Hank looked at a stack of papers. "Here's one from one of Glory's former publishing rivals. They're giving us a free three year subscription."
"Good," Bobby said jokingly. "Now I'll know what kind of lipstick Brittany Spears wears all year round."
"Here's a note from the Bayville Chamber of Commerce," Hank looked at another letter. "Apparently ever since the latest scandals broke the local hotels and restaurants are overflowed with reporters and protesters overflowing. Business is up by over a hundred and fifty percent. They're requesting we come up with a scandal by Fall."
"Nobody can say mutants don't help the economy," Kurt quipped.
"Oh and here's a telegram from Michael Jackson: Thanks for taking some of the heat off," Hank read. "As well as an invitation for some of us to come to Neverland."
"I think we'll pass on that one," Bobby winced.
"Well it's official," Donald walked in as he was shutting off a cell phone. "I've been fired."
"I'm sorry Donald," Jean said.
"Was it the gay thing or the dating the father of a mutant thing?" Bobby asked.
"A little bit of column A and B," Donald sighed.
"When is it ever going to end?" Amara groaned.
"Who could be in a worse position than us right now?" Sam asked.
"That's easy," Rogue said. "Mystique."
"Oh yeah," Bobby nodded. "That does make me feel better."
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"Okay who super glued Mystique to the living room wall?" Low Light asked some of the Misfits in the very same room.
"GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!" Mystique shouted.
"I cannot tell a lie," Todd whistled. "Quickie did it!"
"I did it with my little glue gun," Pietro showed him. "Are you mad?"
"You're darn right I'm mad!" Low Light snapped. "Pietro I cannot believe you!"
"That's right! Finally! Lay down the law around here!" Mystique shouted.
"You know very well that she doesn't go with the color scheme in here," Low Light continued. "We have brown and green. She clashes!"
"WHAT?" Mystique raged, struggling to break free.
"I just wanted to bring some color in here," Pietro said.
"We could always redecorate," Wanda said. "Paint the walls so she'll match."
"Nah too much work," Fred waved. "I'm gonna go get a sandwich."
"Yeah that's a good idea," Althea said as the Misfits started to leave.
"WHAT ABOUT ME?" Mystique screamed.
"What about you?" Todd asked. "You want a sandwich too?"
"GET ME DOWN RIGHT NOW?" Mystique shouted.
"Relax," Pietro waved. "The glue will wear off…Eventually. I think."
"We'll find the glue remover after lunch," Low Light told him. "I feel like a sandwich too."
"AND I FEEL LIKE GETTING OUT OF THIS NUTHOUSE!" Mystique shouted. "GET ME DOWN! NOW! IS ANYONE LISTENING TO ME? HELP!"
Next: The gang has more fun and madness. But the fun is interrupted when someone crashes the party!