A/N- I'm sooooo sorry for the late update. I've been sick and my grandparents are visiting and my parents have needed me to work at the ice cream store and oh, yeah, I had SATs on Saturday. The essay was the stupidest thing ever. Does work affect what you do? Yes... oh, you want more than that? Arrrrgh... Welcome to the new Millennium.
A/N 2- It's Ryan/Rory, Seth/Lane. I just thought it'd be adorable this way. And it's Jess/Original Character loosely based off of my little cousin (Because we were watching GG the other day, and Ally goes "WOAH! Jess is hot! I never noticed that before! Can you make me be his girlfriend in the story?" I was like, I'm so proud of you) I will have Chilton. I'm not sure if I'll have Summer. I'll see if I can bring her in somehow in the future. But thanks for giving me more to work with :). Yes, that is how to spell Kapische. I spell-checked, lol.
A/N 3- The rap song? Completely random and because I needed a prank. I'm glad you all liked it, though. I got mocked endlessly by Ally. Woops. Haha I love her anyway.
Dedicated- to Ally because she and I slept in the same twin bed this weekend and she curled up in the fetal position. Ow. And to Chelsea cuz it's her birthday and she danced with me to Disney music this weekend.
Disclaimer- My throat hurts... Oh, that's right. I own nothing.
Sick and Tired
"Boys, it's time to get up!" Sandy called as he walked down the hall, knocking rhythmically on each of his sons' bedroom doors. He opened the door to Seth's room, knowing that, while that ritual was enough to wake Ryan, it took much more to rouse Seth.
He found his son muttering Beatles lyrics in his sleep, and he shook Seth's shoulder gently.
"Seth, up, it's time for school."
"No, no, I don't want to go to the zoo..." a very sleepy Seth murmured.
"Well, that's good, because you have school."
"Don't want to go there either."
"Tough. I need you and your brother to get jobs and money to support your mother and me when we get old and gray. In order to do that, you need to go to school and learn enough to get good jobs."
"Wait a minute, dad. When you're old and gray ?" Sandy threw a pillow at his son before reminding him,
"Bar Mitzvah lessons after school." Seth groaned as his father laughed manically. Confident that Seth was now awake (as much as could be expected), Sandy wandered down the stairs and into the kitchen, proceeding to cook breakfast for his family.
Ten minutes later, a sleepy-looking Seth trudged down the stairs. He yawned and waved a tired "Good Morning" to his father.
"Eggs will be ready in a minute. Where's your brother?" Seth laid his head down on his arm, resting comfortably on the granite countertop.
"Who?"
"Your brother? Blonde? Blue eyes? About half an inch shorter than you? Answers to the name 'Ryan'? Your best friend since birth?"
"Doesn't ring a bell."
"Seth," his father said warningly.
"I haven't seen him, dad."
"He wasn't in the bathroom?" Seth shook his head as best he could against his arm, "And he wasn't in the hallway?" Another shake of the head, "Was the door to his room open?" Yet another head shake.
Sandy gave Kirsten a perplexed glance as she skipped down the stairs, fully dressed. As she leaned over to kiss Seth's forehead, she stood back up, suddenly confused,
"One's missing."
"You mean, you didn't see Ryan either?"
"Is he not up?"
"I guess not..."
"That's so unlike him..."
"I guess he's just tired."
"I'm gonna go check on him. See if I can wake him up," she glanced down at Seth, whose eyes were now closed again, "You work on this one."
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"Ryan?" Kirsten said tentatively as she opened the door to Ryan's room. No answer, "Honey, are you ok?" A groan, "Ry, c'mon, it's time for school. Don't turn into Seth on us now. Dad and I have enough to deal with trying to get him off to school," She put her hand on her son's forehead to stroke his hair, but instinctively pulled it away, surprised by his forehead's warmth, "Sweetheart, are you ok?" He moaned,
"Yeah, mom. I'm fine." He was spurned into a coughing fit.
"You are not fine. You're sick!"
"What? No, I can't be sick. My Bar Mitzvah is in two weeks! I'll miss lessons!" He paused for a second and reconsidered, "Maybe I am sick..."
"I'll be right back."
"Where are you going?"
"To get the thermometer!" Ryan groaned audibly; that thing always reminded him of the time that Seth got sick- every time their mother put the thermometer in his mouth, he vomited. His mom had been concerned, but Ryan was fairly sure that his brother had been doing it on purpose. Either way, Ryan considered it disgusting.
Kirsten hurried back in, a glass of ice water in one hand, a clear thermometer in the other, her hand moving rapidly up and down, shaking down the thermometer.
"Mom, please!" Ryan pleaded.
"Ryan, you have to take your temperature."
"Mom... that's the throw-up thermometer of 1999!"
"Well, it's 2000 now. No longer the throw-up thermometer."
"Mom!"
"Ryan!" He could tell he wasn't getting anywhere with this, so he tried a new approach- emotional,
"Mommy, pleeeease."
"Ryan Nicholas, that's not going to work."
"Mooom."
"Ryan- mouth, thermometer, now." He knew the tone in his mother's voice. It was the same one she took whenever he and Seth went one prank too far. He obeyed, cringing as the cold glass slid under his tongue. Trying his hardest not to gag, he scratched thoughtlessly at a random spot on his arm- anything to take his mind off the fact that this was the thermometer. He made a mental note to buy a new thermometer as his mother began to ask him,
"So, what are you most excited about for your Bar Mitzvah?" Ryan was about to answer before remembering the thermometer in his mouth; he had done a good job of distracting himself. He rolled his eyes pointedly at his mother, who nodded understandingly, "Right, right." They sat in near-silence for a moment, aside from a few murmurings from Kirsten about how, "Your rug needs to be vacuumed" and "Remind me later to put carrots on the shopping list."
After three minutes, Kirsten pulled the thermometer out of Ryan's mouth and found what she had been expecting.
"101.2. No school for you today, Mr. Cohen."
"Does that mean no Bar Mitzvah lessons?"
"Yeah."
"Yes!"
"Your dad is so proud of how you and Seth are proud of your heritage."
"Hey, it's not the heritage we don't like. It's the three hours a day, four days a week sitting in the 'Stars Hollow Religious Gathering Area' with Rabbi Miller that bothers us." Kirsten shook her head, laughing.
"Back to sleep. Now."
"No arguments here."
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"So, what's the matter with him?" Rory asked Seth as they sat down at a table in the diner.
"Mom said he has the flu. He's got a fever, he's sneezing, and he's got a really bad cough. I also heard my mom tell my dad to 'expect vomit. A lot of vomit.'" Rory winced,
"Breakfast, Seth. We just ate breakfast."
"You asked for the facts."
"I also once asked for a pony, Seth, but I didn't get that. I got a stick with a horse's head on it. Basic. So, give me a stick with a horse's head on it."
"Ew."
"You know what I mean."
"Bad word choice."
"Fine. So, in simple words?"
"In simple words, Ryan is sick. He's missing school today and tomorrow. He should be better by Monday."
"Much better, Sethie." Luke meandered up to their table.
"Hey, you two. Where's Ryan?"
"Home sick."
"With what?"
"Flu or... something."
"Ahh, brotherly love."
"You say potato, I say I'm not going near Ryan's room until my mom tells me it won't end with me calling Ralph on the big white phone."
"Seth!" Luke yelled.
"Ew!" Rory echoed.
"That's gross. You two, go to school. Before I lovk you in your room until the quarantine is over, He added, glancing pointedly at Rory.
"Let's go pick up Lane and Jess. Where are they, anyway?"
"Where are they, anyway?"
"Looking at CDs at her house," Rory carelessly answered. Noticing Seth's downcast look (it was obvious that Seth liked Lane as much as Rory like Ryan), she quickly added, "He needed that one Rolling Stones CD that we didn't have for a school project. She said she'd lend it to him." Seth relaxed and asked,
"How did he get past the Warden?"
"Esther," Rory stated simply.
"Why did you guys name the tree?" asked Luke. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't understand his daughter and her friends.
"Not us. Rory."
"I'm not surprised."
"Dad, can I have a donut before I go?"
"You already had breakfast at home."
"No I didn't."
"Then who was jumping on my bed this morning going, 'Waffles, dad, I want waffles. Waffles, waffles, waffles'?"
"Mom?"
"There were two bodies jumping."
"And... Seth?"
"Hey, don't blame me. I was making sure I didn't get thrown up on by Ryan Sickolas Cohen."
"Pleeeeeeease, daddy?"
"No. I will not let you eat like your mother does."
"You're mean."
"You'll live. School. Now. Don't forget, I need our help today after school. Remind your cousin." Rory pretended to be angry, huffily throwing her books in her bookbag.
Though she put on a good show, Luke only laughed; he could tell when Rory was actually mad and when she was faking in a vain attempt to get her way. When she realized that she wasn't going to be getting a donut, she leaned up and kissed her father's cheek,
"You're a mean father. I'm calling DYFS."
"Well, just do it after school. Lunch money is for lunch, not for calling people to say I'm abusing you on the payphone."
"Bye, dad."
"Bye, kids."
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"Here you go, Aftermath by the Rolling Stones. Great for jamming, rocking out, or using in a history project," Lane told Jess as she handed him the disc and put her floorboard back in place.
"Thanks so much, Lane. If I didn't do well on this project, my uncle would kill me."
"Not to mention your aunt."
"Oh, yeah. I can't decide which is worse. When it's just my uncle disciplining, it winds up with me helping out at the diner. Or when my aunt disciplines, it's usually chores around the house. My two all-time favorites, though, are when they do it together and they form this weird wall of anger and they make me sit down in front of them while they talk, or when they do tag-team. My aunt comes in and does the lecturing thing, then she tells me to 'Wait until my uncle finds out' in this really creepy voice and then, when he gets home, he comes into my room and gives me another lecture. Those are really terrific." He said sarcastically.
"Yeah. It's not really like that in my house. My mama usually does all the discipline. I see my papa maybe once a week, at most."
"What does he do?"
"Not really sure. He's around, somewhere, all week, just kinda lurking, and then he'll randomly come out, mumble something in Korean, eat some soy, and then disappear again."
"Not so close with him?"
"He called me 'Jane' last week while muttering something about the decline of the Korean economy. Usually, it's just my mama who does all the lecturing." Jess paused for a second before adding questioningly,
"I don't think I've ever met your papa."
"Not many people have. Rory did. Once. When we were six. My mama had to go to a 'Christian Koreans Church Banquet' and Rory's mom and dad had to go out, so my papa watched us. That was the only time, though."
"What's he like?"
"Korean," Lane said without hesitation, "That's about all I know... Hey, who are you working on the project with?"
"Alexis. You know her?"
"Alexis Leigh?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah, I do," Jess paused for a second before asking cautiously, "Can I tell you a secret?"
"Oooh, a secret? Sure, I love secrets!"
"You can't tell anyone."
"I won't."
"Not Ryan. Not Seth."
"Nope."
"Especially not Rory."
"I promise. Jess, just tell me!"
"I think..." he inhaled before blurting out, "I think I like Ally!"
"Ally Leigh, Ally?"
"Yeah." He sighed; it felt good to get that off of his chest. He had wanted to tell someone for a while, but he knew he couldn't tell the Cohen boys; they'd surely tell Rory. His uncle? Luke would give him an hour-long lecture on how to treat a girl. His aunt? There would be a lot of teasing, followed by an hour's worth of kissing noises and singing "Jess and Ally sitting in a tree...". His cousin? Rory would tell Lorelai, and then they'd do a round of "Jess and Ally sitting in a tree...". At least with Lane, he could trust that she wouldn't make fun of him and most likely wouldn't tell Rory.
"That's..." Jess dreaded the next words she was going to say. Weird? Stupid? Ridiculous? "so cool!"
"Really?"
"Yeah!" He inhaled again before decidedly continuing,
"It's so weird, Lane. I love to be with her. She's pretty and smart and funny. And when I'm not with her, I'm thinking about her." Lane sighed,
"That's awesome... I wish I had someone who would think about me whenever I wasn't around." Jess's jaw dropped,
"Lane..." he said tentatively.
"Yeah?"
"Seth," he said simply but pointedly.
"What? Is he here?" She looked around, trying to find her friend.
"No, Lane. He likes you."
"What? No, no he doesn't!"
"Yeah, Lane. He does. Wake up and smell the Cohen."
"Ew."
"Get over it. Seth likes you."
"No!"
"Lane, you've never seen the way he looks at you when you're not looking at you. He always talks about you. He really, really likes you."
"That's just your opinion, Jess."
"Rory thinks so, too. We talked about it."
"You talked about it?"
"All good stuff. There's only so many episodes of The Fat Ladies that we can watch with Lorelai before it gets old. We need something to talk about."
"Glad I can be of service."
"Lane, get over it... Hey... do you like Seth?" She paused and inhaled before saying slowly,
"Secret?"
"If you keep mine."
"Yeah... I do." Jess smiled broadly,
"I want you to repeat after me, 'I, Lane Kim, like Seth Cohen'."
"Jess..."
"Lane, now."
"Fine... I, Lane Kim, like Seth Cohen'."
"'And Seth Cohen likes me'."
"Jess, I don't think you're really what he's looking for."
"Lane, say it..." She took a long pause before continuing,
"And Seth Cohen... is right there," she said, pointing to the window where Seth had suddenly appeared. Jess swung his head around to see Seth waving feverishly at them, perched on a tree branch, Rory's brown ponytail bobbing below it.
"Thank heavens for Esther," Lane muttered before joining her friends in their walk to school.
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Ryan sat straight up in bed upon hearing the noise.
The clank of the trays and plates distracted him from his television, the rustle of his mother's footsteps coming ever closer.
He knew what this meant. Food that he didn't want to eat, and medicine that he didn't want to take. He momentarily grappled with the idea of locking the door before his mom could enter, but he reconsidered upon realizing that he'd still be locked in his room after he got better due to severe grounding.
"Lunch is served, Master Cohen," Kirsten said in a mock-butler's voice, pushing the door to his bedroom open with her elbow. He sat up, pushing his back against his headboard, sitting himself on a few pillows. As he settled in, his mother placed a tray filled with food in front of him, "Here, you go, sweetheart. Orange juice for your nose, water for your throat, crackers for your stomach, and the Nana's Matzoh Ball soup. Homemade." Ryan eyed his mother warily, "Dad made it before he left. Don't worry." He nodded appreciatively, "How do you feel?"
"Sick. Tired. Throw-uppy."
"Throw-uppy's not a word, sweetheart." Ryan threw her a glare, telling her instantly that he didn't care, "Have you thrown up again?"
"No."
"How does your head feel?"
"Hurts."
"Ok, sweetheart. You're so tired- you should go back to sleep," he nodded, "But first," he groaned- he knew what was coming next, "You need to take your medicine."
"Uggggh," he whined.
"Cherry or grape?" she ignored his complaint. He shrugged,
"Neither."
"Grape it is, then." As she turned away to pour his medicine, he grabbed her arm.
"Cherry, please."
"Sure, sweetheart."
"Hey, mom?"
"Yeah, Ry?"
"I hate being sick."
"No one likes it."
"Seth does."
"Well, it's why he's Seth."
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Luke glanced up, hearing the jingling of the bells as the door to the diner opened. He heard two familiar voices intermingled with one unfamiliar ones; they belonged to two familiar brunette heads and one unfamiliar fairer-haired one.
He sauntered over to their table, kissing Rory on the head and ruffling Jess's hair affectionately,
"Hey, guys. How was school?"
"Good."
"Okay."
"Luke, this is Ally," Jess introduced the girl he had entered with, "She's my partner for my history project."
"Hey, it's nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you, too, Mr. Danes."
Luke took a good look at the girl. She was a bit shorter than Rory, though he knew that Rory was tall for her age. Her dirty blonde hear was pulled back in a meticulous pony-tail, highlighting her freckles. Her brown eyes sparkled with flecks of green that reflected her green t-shirt and green belt tucked into her jeans.
"Please, call me Luke."
"Oh, thanks, Luke. I actually have to go. Jess and Rory just wanted to show me your diner. I'll be back, I promise."
"You've never been here before?"
"My family just moved here last month."
"Ok, well, it's nice to meet you."
"You too. Bye, Rory. Bye, Jess."
"Bye, Ally." Jess walked the girl to the door and watched her as she walked away.
Luke, though he saw "the look" in his nephew's eyes, shook Jess from his reverie,
"Jess, c'mere a sec."
"Yeah, Luke?"
"Your mom called today."
"Liz called?" Jess asked, a bit of edge evident in his voice, "What did she want?"
"Yeah, she called. Could you please call her mom? She is your mother, after all," Jess merely shrugged, "Anyway, she's going to be in town on Saturday... she wants to spend the day with you?"
"With me?"
"Yeah, with you."
"She's actually going to show this time?"
"Jess..."
"No, no, Uncle Luke. I'll go. I'll believe it when I see it, but I'll go." Jess stormed away, leaving Luke upset at his nephew's reaction.
Liz, this kid doesn't deserve this. The flightiness was cute when you were a kid, but your son needs you. Don't flake out this time.
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"Hey, do you think we've been spending enough time with Rory lately?" Luke asked Lorelai later that night as she sat sipping coffee in the diner. Rory was at Lane's for a bit and the diner was close to closing.
"What?"
"Rory. It's just that, since Jess has been here, it feels like she hasn't been getting as much downtime with us as she did before. It always feels like we're chasing after Jess- making sure he's not getting into trouble, doing well in school. I feel like we never fuss over her like we used to.
"I don't think she minds. She understands. She definitely gets downtime. Besides, we spend way more time with her than most parents do with their twelve-year-olds."
"Still... I feel like she was an only child for ten years. Then , bam! She's got to divide the attention."
"She's been watching Seth and Ryan for years already. She has role models. Good ones."
"But that's different. Seth and Ryan have been brothers since birth." She paused and reconsidered,
"Have you heard her say anything about it?"
"No..."
"Has she been acting any differently?"
"No..."
"Has she given you any indication that this might be true?"
"I can see it in her eyes."
"Honey, I think she's fine. But if you want us to all go out as a family when Liz is here, we can go to the mall. Rory needs a new outfit for Seth and Ryan's Bar Mitzvah anyway."
"Thank you," he said as he leaned over the counter to kiss her lightly.
"You're welcome. But... since you brought it up, I'm sure Rory would love if her daddy paid," She stood up and ran out the door before he could respond, "Bye, sweetie!"
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"Hello? Rory! You here?" Lane called into the empty house on Saturday afternoon as she opened the door. She tiptoed in. There was still the possibility that Rory was hanging out downstairs with Jess.
She jumped back when she heard a different voice than expected,
"Her parents took her out shopping," Seth casually meandered into the foyer, a sandwich in hand, "Man, I wish my dad owned a diner. There's always good food here."
"Seth!" Lane screamed, fixing her now-askew glasses and pushing him, causing him to stumble backwards.
"Woah! Lane! What's the matter?"
"What the heck are you doing here!"
"Ryan's still sick! Luke and Lorelai said I could hang out here today!"
"You gave me a heart attack!"
"I'm a heartbreaker."
"Uggh, Seth. Always modest."
"You don't think I'm a heartbreaker?" Seth asked, masking his crestfallen gaze with a joke.
"I didn't say that," Lane flirted. Flirted? Oh G-d. I'm flirting? I'm flirting with Seth? Stop! He doesn't even like me like that! No matter what Jess and Rory say. But then again... Rory doesn't even realize that Ryan likes her... Lane Kim, stop! Mama would kill me... all the more reason... "So, where's Jess, then?"
"His mom's in town. He's out with her... Do you want to hang out? I mean, I'm sure Luke and Lorelai won't mind..." C'mon, Seth. Be a little bit more obvious... Ryan would kill me if he saw me flat-out falling all over her like this.
"Oh, yeah, thanks. It's soy and tofu night at the Kim household. At least you and I could have sandwiches or something." Or maybe a nice picnic... Lane Kim, STOP!
"Oh, Luke and Lorelai should be back to cook dinner later. We're 'welcome to stay'." I'd rather just hang out alone with you.
"Sure. That'd be fun."
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Jess and Liz walked side-by-side in Stars Hollow, neither touching the other. Jess felt a pang of remorse; whenever he walked through town with Luke and Lorelai, there was always an arm around his shoulder, and affectionate ruffle of the hair, or Rory's incessant tugging on his arm to get him to their destination quicker. With his mother, he walked in awkward silence, permeated only by momentary small talk. With his aunt and cousin, it was never silent. There was no need for small talk.
"So," Liz started cautiously, "You like school?"
"Yeah, my teacher's pretty nice. Rory's not in my class, though. As much as she tried to be," he laughed at the memory before realizing his mother was staring at him in confusion, "I'm sorry."
"No, no. Don't worry about it. What happened?" Jess paused,
"Well, you know that Rory and some of our friends have a habit of pulling pranks."
"Oh, yeah. Luke told me about what you guys did at the play last year." She stopped and waited for Jess to continue, obviously not realizing her slip.
Lorelai had convinced Jess to call Liz and invite her to see "The Wizard of Oz" the previous year. Liz had told him she'd "try and be there- 99 sure I will", but the day before the show, she had called and canceled.
Though he put up a tough front to his aunt (who had promptly taken him out to a "Lorelai-and-Jess ice cream banquet"), he was secretly crushed. His aunt Lorelai was terrific, and he lover her to pieces, but he occasionally just wanted his mother to be there.
He pushed the familiar buried feelings away before explaining,
"Well, we have these friends, Lane, Seth, and Ryan, and we spend, like, every day together. We're all really close. So, at the beginning of the year, we found out that Lane and I were in one class, and Ryan, Seth, and Rory were in the other. So, the second day of school, they all come in dressed in all black. Seth was like, 'We're going to be stealth'.
"So, right after we take attendance, Ryan comes in, and he takes one of the desks in the back, like it's the most normal thing in the world. Then Rory comes in and does the same thing. Seth came in last. He kinda rolled into the room."
"He rolled?" Liz laughed.
"Mission Impossible," Jess explained quickly, "So, the teacher goes, 'What are you three doing in here?' And Seth goes, 'We're in this class.' So the teacher goes, 'No, you aren't.' And Ryan was like, 'Aye, mate, we are. I'm Kangaroo McDingo' in this really bad Australian accent. Mr. Wallace goes, 'Aren't you Ryan Cohen?'." He began to inflict his voice to present the different characters, "No, no, didn't you hear him? He's Kangaroo" he imitated Rory.
"'Aren't you Rory Danes?'" He imitated Mr. Wallace.
"'No. I am Miss Muffet. Miss Delilah Muffet. Have you seen my tuffet?'" He pretended to be Rory again.
"'I know your father. I eat at his diner twice a week. I've seen pictures of you together. You are Rory Danes!'" Mr. Wallace again.
"'You're really bad at names, aren't you? That's Kangaroo. That's Delilah.'" This time he made his voice a bit higher to imitate Seth.
"'And who are you today?'" Mr. Wallace.
"'Arnold Drummond's the name, sir.'" Seth.
"Ok, now that's just weird. Aren't you Seth Cohen? You're his brother!'" Mr. Wallace. Jess returned to his normal voice to finish the story, "And then, Mrs. Kellan, their teacher, runs in and brings them all back to their room. It was great," he laughed.
Liz looked at the son who she barely knew. There was something different- a sparkle in his eye. He was really happy. He was being a kid.
She felt a pang of guilt knowing that, as a mother, she had been the child. Her son had been the parent.
Jess was the kid now.
And he was happy.
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Luke walked behind Rory and Lorelai as they shopped in Old Navy, having just finished their escapade in Nordstrom (The result of which was a new black blouse and white skirt outfit, a pair of jeans, and two t-shirts for Rory, though she had to be forced to allow her parents to buy her those outfits). Luke waited for Rory to attack the skirts and sweaters that she was so fond of, but instead, she veered off to the boys' section.
"Rory, are you trying a new look? Or just telling us to start calling you Larry instead of Rory?" Lorelai joked.
"No, no. Jess would love this shirt, don't you think?"
"Yeah, sweets, he would, but don't you want to shop?"
"I am. Jess's birthday is coming up."
"Rory, sweetheart, Daddy and I got Jess's presents already. A whole bunch of stuff."
"But, I don't need anything else. I have clothes. Jess's birthday comes before mine anyway."
"We know," Luke said.
"Dad and I just thought you'd like a shopping day. Just the three of us."
"Oooookay..." She glanced at her father's reaction, expecting to see eyes rolling and a look that suggested that he'd only do this for his family. To her surprise, however, he nodded encouragingly,
"Go ahead, Ror. Try on some of those purple skirts over there. They'd look really good with that purple and white sweater."
"Honey, do you want to shop in this section?" Lorelai hugged Luke's arm while joking playfully with him. Luke only sighed,
"Rory, go shop."
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"No way is Ned Flanders better than Ralph Wiggum!" Seth yelled at Lane as they sat on the floor of the den, a bowl of popcorn between them.
"Flanders is totally better than Wiggum, Seth. Ralph Wiggum is there for stupid jokes."
"You only like Flanders because he makes fun of everything that your mom stands for."
"So? You only like Ralph Wiggum because he's..."
"Pure genius!" Seth interrupted.
"I was going to say 'Full of stupid humor', but whatever floats your boat."
"You can't not like Ralph. It just doesn't work like that, Lane."
"I don't know... maybe you can show me some time," Lane suggested, her tone flirting again.
"Maybe," he answered, suddenly a bit more relaxed. There was a nice pause between them. It wasn't uncomfortable; it was more of a silent understanding of their feelings.
"So... we should watch something else. This show make us fight too much." Seth nodded and stood up, taking out the Simpsons tape and grabbing the remote control.
"Lane, Fresh Prince reruns or Rugrats reruns?"
"Fresh Prince. I can't deal with any more Tommy Pickles for the moment. My little cousins came over and it was the only show that my mom let us watch. Even then she kept a close eye on us." Seth laughed and sat back down across from her. They sat in silence for a moment, watching the antics of Will and Carlton before they both, simultaneously, reached into the popcorn bowl.
Lane's cheeks flushed.
Seth's stomach flipped.
Lane couldn't believe it. It was like Lady and the Tramp.
Seth couldn't believe it. It was like he'd hoped it'd happen.
Their eyes met, each staring deep into the other's chocolate brown eyes.
They inched their faces closer together.
I can't believe this is about to happen, thought Lane.
Today, I am a man, thought Seth, I don't need the Bar Mitzvah. Today I get my girl.
They came closer... and closer... and closer... until...
They jumped away from each other at the sound of the door opening. Seth silently cursed the Danes family for preventing him from kissing Lane. It was the perfect moment. He'd probably never find a better one.
"Hey, Seth, we're home!" Lorelai called as she rounded the corner, "Oh, Lane, I didn't know you were here. What's up, kid?"
"Nothing, Lorelai."
"Ok, well, you're welcome to stay for dinner."
"Thanks."
Seth and Lane glanced at each other.
They wouldn't talk about it.
Not just yet.
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Sunday morning, Luke and Lorelai woke up at the same time, both smiling as they took in the scene in front of them.
Jess had fallen asleep on the easy chair right next to Luke; Liz was downstairs in his room.
Lorelai fell asleep on the couch, her feet up on the coffeetable.
Luke had fallen asleep on the opposite side in the same position.
Rory was curled up, her head on her father's chest, a blanket covering her midriff, and her feet resting comfortably on her mother's lap. In her sleep, she muttered,
"I love you, daddy."
"Hey, Luke... I thinkwe found what she really wants."
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The next week came with a flurry of activity. Liz had left, thanking Luke and Lorelai for 'everything' with a wink. Ryan had gotten better, but not before having a Dimetapp-induced heart-to-heart with Seth.
"So, you almost kissed her?" Ryan asked, his covers askew over his tired body.
"Yeah. Pretty close. Then Lorelai came in." Seth blushed; he couldn't bring himself to meet Ryan's eye.
"My little brother's all grown up," Ryan joked.
"I'm an hour and twelve minutes older than you are!"
"You'll always be my little brother."
"No, you're still my little brother."
"Why's that?"
"Because you still haven't made your move on Rory."
"I'm working on it. We're almost thirteen. In Dad's religion, I'm still a boy. Give me time. I'll do it when I'm ready... Ok, little brother?"
"I'm not your little brother! You're just all hyped up on cold medicine. Get back to sleep. Mom will kill us both if you aren't better for the Bar Mitzvah."
Come Saturday, Ryan was fully recovered, and the party had been put into place, a whole bunch of last-minute preparations fixed by Kirsten.
The ceremony was beautiful, but the party was a blast.
At Miss Patty's dance studio, the entire town came out to celebrate the event. The theme was "TV, Movies, and Music," and Ryan, Seth, Lane, Jess, and Rory were seated at the table deemed "The Beatles: #1 for all eternity".
The adults watched as the kids sat, chatted, danced, and ate.
"Can you believe they're teenagers already?" Kirsten asked Lorelai.
"I think we've done a pretty good job. Don't you agree?"
"Totally."
"I'm proud of us."
"Me too."
"So, you know that Seth tried to kiss Lane the other day, right?"
"He WHAT?"
"Your son... was almost a man. I walked in on them on Saturday. They were this close." Kirsten sighed,
"Welcome to the teen years, also known as insanity, party of four."
"And we love them anyway."