A/N- Ok. I suck. And I know it. It's been forever, and I recognize that. But I tell you this now. Now that school's started, I have more time to work on my stories (backwards, I know). I'm sorry. Oh yeah, I'm sorry.
A/N 2- Questions!...Ally and Jess?Ryan and Rory? Seth and Lane? I don't know! Well, maybe I do, but you'll have to wait to find out... Umm I'm not done with Chilton. They're still in their first year at Chilton. They're still sixteen. Sorry if I confused you...
Dedicated to: Everyone who knew the movie in the last chapter (Like a year ago) was The Producers. That would be: Sea4Shoes (Chelsea) andpotostfbeyeluvr... That was very few people. I'm surprised.
Challenge: What show are Ryan and Rory talking about while walking through the hallways of Chilton? Same rules as always.
Extra Credit: What is on pages 99-100 of America: The Book that Ally and Jess are discussing later on in the chapter?
Disclaimer: Don't even own my Statistics book... you get the picture...
Silver and Gold
"Dude, I can't believe that you're actually going in to take a math test during lunch. Don't tell me you like Mrs. Rosenfeld better than you like us." Jess rolled his eyes at his friend,
"I don't, Seth, but I have to make up this test today and I can't stay after because I'm watching Josh and Hannah this afternoon while my mom and Rory do stuff for the charity yard sale." Seth rolled his eyes and watched as Ryan, walking alongside him, waved at Rory, who was walking purposefully in the other direction, her nose buried in her book about Kafka.
"You just had to go and skip school that day, didn't you, Mariano?"
"You mean the day I was throwing up every hour on the hour? Yeah, I love playing hooky."
They arrived at Jess' math class and he gave a small wave goodbye, moving towards the front left corner of the room, away from the two girls and one guy chatting animatedly in two furthest rows from him. He saw one of them, a tall, tanned brunette, look back at him repeatedly; he could've sworn he saw her blush.
Easily bored, Jess soon began tapping his foot in frustration before the other girl in the corner, a thin, short, hazel-eyed blonde girl turned her attention to him,
"If you're waiting for Mrs. Rosenfeld, it's gonna be a little while."
"What?"
"Yeah. She ran out of here a few minutes ago- said it was an emergency, but that she'll be back before the end of the period, and we should just wait here."
"Oh..."
"Personally, I think that someone was about to take the last of the coffee in the teacher's lounge, and that she was anticipating a fight, but I could be wrong."
"Ok... Thanks," he moved to pull a book and the muffin he'd bought earlier out of his bookbag, but stopped as the blonde girl spoke again,
"So, what's your story?"
"Me?"
"Yeah, you. What are you in for?"
"In for?"
"Yeah, Polly. Why are you in here this period?" Jess narrowed his eyes; who was this girl?
""I, um... I have to make up a test. You?" The boy sniggered and turned to the blonde, who, it was quickly becoming obvious, was the leader of the group,
"There was a pencil on the floor. We picked it up, shared it between the three of us on three different days. Little did we know it was Rosenfeld's pencil. She found us using it and she gave us lunchtime detention."
"Really?"
"Who would joke about that?" Jess started to laugh as the leader asked, "What's your name?" He looked at the other girl, who was trying to hide her blushing cheeks, and the guy, who was regarding him stonily,
"Jess. Mariano."
"Mariano..." The spokesgirl mused, "Where have I heard someone mention that name before?" She looked at the brunette and narrowed her eyes; Jess recognized it as the silent communication that he and the rest of the Kelly Road Posse shared. The brunette nodded and spoke for the first time,
"You're... Laurie's brother, right?" Jess couldn't help but grin,
"I have a sister named Rory, if that's who you mean."
"That's right. Rory... she's in our health class. I didn't know her last name was Mariano," the blonde took over again.
"It's not. She's Rory Danes."
"Oh, that's right."
"How did you know we were related?"
"She did a family tree in class once and she mentioned your name. She had a picture of you up there."
"Oh, yeah. I remember that project. She drove my dad nuts trying to get information out of him about his mom and dad."
"Aren't you guys really, like, cousins or something?" Jess shrugged,
"Biologically... well, biologically, not really. Do you want the long version or the short version?"
"We've got time." Jess sighed; this was a story he knew well, but not one he told often, as the people of Stars Hollow all knew it from firsthand experience,
"Ok, well, I am Luke's, my dad's, biological nephew. His sister is my biological mother. Rory's mom, Lorelai- both of our mom, really- had Rory when she was sixteen..."
"Young..."
"Yeah. So, when Rory was one, Lorelai met Luke, and when Rory was four, they got married. Luke adopted Rory when she was five, and therefore, we are cousins."
"Ok. We're following so far." You talk for everyone now?
"So, when I was ten, Liz, my biological mom, sent me to Luke and Lorelai so that they could 'straighten me out'. They started treating me like their kid, so I started acting like it. Then, about five months ago, Lorelai had twins, and we all started calling them my brother and sister, so I started calling Luke and Lorelai 'mom and dad'. And that's the whole story."
"Wow," said the brunette. The blonde, seemingly more phased than the guy, and less phased than the brunette, asked,
"So, technically, you guys aren't brother and sister?"
"No, we are. We're actually going through adoption stuff right now. We're just taking it slowly."
"Ok."
"So..." Jess said, a little uncomfortable, "Now that you know my name and family history, can I know your names?" The girls both laughed, and the guy shifted uncomfortably in his seat, seemingly doodling on his notepad.
"Sorry. I'm Emory, spelled with an 'o' and not an 'e'. My mom thought it was more feminine that way," said the blonde girl.
"Emory as in..."
"As in emery boards, yes. My mom has an obsession with cosmetics... This is my boyfriend Charlie," Charlie grunted in acknowledgement, and for the first time, Jess took in his appearance; he was tall, thin, but not lanky, and had shaggy red hair, which, at the moment, was tousled messily, "Charlie's antisocial around people he doesn't know, aren't you, Snookums?" She teased her boyfriend, who shot her a dirty glance, "C'mon, Charlie, be polite for once in your life." Before anything could happen, Jess stopped them,
"No, it's ok," he turned to the brunette, "And you are?"
"Early." Jess, confused, looked at the clock above the doorway, then to his watch, then back to the three teenagers to look for any indication of teasing. When he found none, he asked, only slightly able to hide his incredulity,
"Early?" Early sighed,
"Sadly. My father named me because my mother got to name my brothers. He has an obsession with being punctual. And he wanted to name me something that matched my brothers names' weirdness."
"What are your brother's names?"
"Esacriats and Nehctik."
"Are you serious?"
"Yeah. And we figured out, when Sam was fourteen, Nick was..."
"Sam and Nick?"
"Yeah. We couldn't let them go by Nehctik and Esacriats after the Demerol wore off, now, could we?"
"Good point."
"As I was saying, Sam was fourteen, Nick was twelve, and I was eleven, we figured out that their names backwards were Staircase and Kitchen..."
"You don't mean..."
"We asked my dad. Mom was so whacked out when she was naming us that all she could think of was the event that led to the horrible pain of giving birth, and therefore, all she could think of were the locations where the events took place. If my dad hadn't jumped in, I could've wound up being Moorhtab." Jess paused for a second, then realized what that meant,
"Bathroom? Ew. Too much info," Early and Emory both laughed, and Jess swore he even saw Charlie crack a smile. But he could've been wrong, "So... If your brothers go by Nick and Sam, do you have a nickname too, or do you go by Early?"
"Well, my friends call me Ella."
"Think I could?"
"We'll see."
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Rory sat on the floor beside her parents' bed, playing with her baby brother, who was laying on the floor gym while Jess kept busy changing Hannah. As Joshua smiled at her, Rory heard her mother proclaim dramatically,
"Absolutely nothing." Rory rolled her eyes and pushed a toy to keep Josh occupied and stood up, coming to Lorelai's side,
"Oh, come on."
"I'm sorry, I'm looking, but there is nothing in here." Rory sighed,
"Mom, you're kidding, right? I'm actually surprised that Dad's let you keep all this stuff. Usually he makes you throw out any stuff that you don't use."
"Well, a man can't come between a woman and the clothes that she wears on a daily basis."
"What?"
"I do. There's nothing to give up."
"The red and black halter top?"
"Oh, no."
"Why?"
"Uh, it's a classic. I wore it on my fourth date with your dad. And it fits me again."
"It's got rhinestones and zebra stripes on it."
"So?" Lorelai gave Rory a quizzical look.
"Tassels."
"I finally lost all the baby weight. I can wear it again."
"Will you?"
"Yes." Rory knew she was lying,
"It has tassels, mom."
"Ok, I've had this since I was 17."
"Ok, I'm sorry did I mention the tassels?"
"You are heartless and unsentimental. Let's see what your little brother thinks," she held the shirt up to herself and walked over to where her youngest son was laying, "Joshy baby, what do you think of this shirt for mommy?" Josh gave a small smile and giggle, and Lorelai looked triumphant, "See? Josh likes this shirt. He's laughing."
"He's not laughing with you." Lorelai stuck her tongue out at Rory,
"And to think, I give you eldest daughter privileges."
"Because you are a hopeless packrat, and without me, no one would make sure you donated this stuff to people who really need it."
"I don't understand why I have to up root my happy family of clothing anyway. You and Luke and Kirsten and Sandy and the boys all ganged up on me on this."
"Because it's a charity rummage sale."
"I know."
"That you helped organize."
"Ok."
"And volunteered to run with Kirsten."
"Your little twin devil siblings kept me up the night before. They could've talked me into anything, I was so tired."
"It was your idea."
"Ok, I am a very sick woman and that should be apparent to anyone. Especially you, my flesh and blood." Rory sighed and, glancing at the picture of her parents on their dresser, knew what she had to do (If only because she knew that it was what her father would do in this situation),
"Ok, get out of the way," She made a move towards the closet, which Lorelai quickly blocked,
"What are you doing?"
"Step away from the closet please," she pushed her mother aside and heard Joshua start to whimper, "Go take care of your son for a minute. He will make this less painful." Lorelai turned away and picked up the baby, who had recently learned to roll from his front to his side, and had found a toy ball to put in his mouth, but when she turned around, she saw Rory pull an entire section of clothing out of her closet,
"Oh! Oh, this is so unfair! Oh no, no, no, not that whole chunk!" She scanned the pile of clothing quickly, "Well, just... ok, take that, that's ugly. Just that one...no...uh." Rory grabbed her mother's outstretched hand and placed it gently on Joshua's back; he was propped up against his mother's chest, looking around curiously. She pointed to the pile of clothing resting in her arms and told Lorelai,
"Ok, now all of this goes," she very quickly ran halfway down the stairs, throwing the pile of clothing carefully onto the ground below. Returning to her parents' bedroom, she took her brother from her mother, "I'm gonna take Josh. I want you to come over here to this dresser, open up the top drawer and take out everything of yours that you'd be embarrassed to be wearing during a car accident. Meet me downstairs."
"I can't take any of your dad's clothes out of here?"
"Daddy already donated a whole bunch of stuff..." she cut her mother off before she could ask, "And don't say it's easy for him to donate because he wears the same shirt in different colors every day." Propping Josh up, Rory moved towards the stairs, leaving with a final, "Move!"
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Downstairs, Kirsten, Seth, and Sookie were all organizing the donated clothes.
"I don't think you should sell that," commented Seth, watching Rory descend the stairs with Joshua.
"Funny, Seth. Your parents tried to sell you at the last one, but no one would buy." Seth's jaw dropped,
"Mom, Rory's making fun of me!" Kirsten laughed, and Sookie clapped her hands together, narrowly missing a lamp on the table next to her,
"Look at the two of them. They're just like brother and sister!" They heard a faint honking outside and Sookie jumped at the noise, "Oh, that must be Jackson. He said he's dropping off his donations around now." Sookie moved to step over the pile of jackets lying on the floor to greet her boyfriend of one week (their first date had been a week earlier, and Sookie had asked Lorelai to double-date with Jackson's cousin Rune. Rune, apparently, having learned that Lorelai was married with four children, kept his nose turned up and refused to talk to her the entire time. Luke had seemed ok with it, if not a bit skeptical at first, but upon seeing the guy, who was 4'10" with a bad attitude, had laughed it off, kissed his wife goodbye, and bid them a good time). She tripped over the myriad of clothing and fell face-first; luckily, her fall was broken by the pile of pajamas in front of her,
"I'm ok, I'm ok." Seth helped her up and she brushed herself off before running to the door, tripping over her own feet twice more. Sookie brushed past Lane, who was entering the house carrying a box full of too-small clothing of hers and her mother's.
"Is it bad that Sookie almost fell down the stairs just now?"
"Bad? Yes," Rory answered, putting her baby brother into his Exersaucer.
"Surprising? Not really," Seth finished. Kirsten rolled her eyes,
"She's just excited to see her boyfriend. Be nice."
"Oh, Kirsten, don't get us wrong, we all love Sookie."
"She's just a bit of a klutz sometimes." Rory turned to Lane,
"What do you have?"
"Some of my mom's and my old stuff, already sorted."
"Just throw it into the piles, then." Lane did as requested and then moved to help Rory organize a box of things dropped off earlier by Gypsy, though not before stopping to give Seth a warm kiss hello.
"Sweater?" asked Rory, holding up a pink, furry sweater.
"Over here." Rory tossed it to her and picked up a pair of pants,
"Jeans?"
"In back of you." Rory turned around and dropped the embroidered denim jeans into the box labeled "pants". Rory picked up something oddly-shaped,
"A big furry purple thing that could be either a hat, a toilet paper cover or some kind of dirty hand puppet."
"Mystery box on the left," Lane answered, not bothering to glance at the object. Seth, however, look up in curiosity,
"Hey, Ror, lemme see that," he extended his arms and flailed wildly as he tried (and failed) to catch the purple object. He retrieved it from the ground and examined it, turning to his mother, "Mom, can I keep it?"
"What?"
"Walter, the purple object. It's so cute and furry."
"What are you talking about?"
"I want a pet. I want this to be my pet. I don't need to feed it, it makes no mess, and it won't wake me up in the middle of the night." Kirsten studied her son's eyes,
"Seth Ezekiel, you can't believe that's ac..."
"Kirsten, he's kidding," Rory explained, never looking up from yet another something furry (this time in turquoise).
"Oh, ok." The back door opened and Luke's voice echoed through the house,
"Hey."
"Hey, Dad."
"Where does your lunatic mother want these?"
"What do you have?"
"Rags and some old pots and pans from the diner."
"Are they the ones that we pretended we were the Beatles on?" Luke sighed,
"I think so."
"Hey, no!" Lane protested.
"You can't throw those away," Seth added.
"They were a cherished part of our childhood, daddy."
"A cherished part of your childhood and a terrible memory of mine. I needed to get all new kitchenware."
"So? This old stuff was old and dirty and smelled anyway."
"Yeah, we did you a favor."
"Rory," he said warningly; there was no way he was keeping the rusted old pots and pans. Rory sighed in defeat,
"Kitchenware goes in the kitchen. We have a system, father."
"Kirsten organized it?" Kirsten nodded,
"You know your wife. You think this was her?" Luke shook his head and disappeared into his kitchen.
"Here, Grinch," greeted Lorelai as she trudged down the stairs.
"Thank you." Rory haphazardly tossed the clothes to her left as her mother lifted Joshua to her hip,
"Who wants cheese?"
"Are there crackers?" Seth asked.
"Somewhere in the state of Connecticut, yes there are crackers."
"And in the Danes' house?" Rory asked, already knowing the answer; her mother had made the most recent shopping trip to Doose's,
"Who wants cheese?"
"Me, please," Lane raised her hand, "Um, kittens in the toilet poster?" Seth sighed,
"Another?"
"This one's signed," Lane shrugged as Lorelai disappeared into the kitchen,
"Ah! There a man in my kitchen, somebody call the constable."
"Yeah, well, better I be in the kitchen than you. At least I won't burn down the house."
"One time! That was one time!"
"Hello to you, too," Luke leaned down and pecked her hello before reentering the den,
"Your mom's a fruit cake."
"You married her."
"Fruit cakes by the door, please," Lorelai's voice wafted in before she did, carrying a scarf she found lying by the back door.
"I'm going back to the diner," he sighed, "Where are Jess and Hannah?"
"Upstairs in the nursery. Probably both asleep on the rocking chair." Luke nodded,
"Good luck. Call me if your mother finally loses it."
"Will do." He kissed his daughter's forehead and made his way to his son, still nestled in Lorelai's arms, who had smiled the moment he had seen his father, "Bye, Joshy. Please be normal, for daddy's sake, ok?" Lorelai stuck her tongue out,
"Just for that, his first word is gonna be coffee."
"Goodbye, crazy lady," he kissed his wife goodbye and kissed his son's forehead, "Bye, guys, see you later."
"Daddy! Dad!" Rory called out as Luke turned to leave,
"What, Ror?"
"Could you stop at the market and pick up crackers? It's urgent."
"What?" he looked at Lorelai, "I missed it, didn't I?"
"Sorry."
"Yes, I'll bring crackers home, Rory."
"Thank you, daddy." He wandered out the back door, gently pulling it closed behind him.
"Ok, so rummage sale's Sunday, today is Tuesday. At this rate, we are going to be sleeping in the yard by Thursday. We have got to start getting some of this stuff out of the living room."
At that moment, Ryan and Sandy entered the living room through the back door,
"Hey!" Lorelai groaned,
"More stuff! What piles do THESE go in?"
"Just put us under Pinky and the Brain memorabilia."
"Really? I was thinking that you two were more 'Wayne and Garth'."
"No, that's us," Seth motioned between himself and Ryan.
"Ren," Ryan motioned to himself, and then to his father, "and Stimpy. Now that that's settled, where do you want this?" Ryan held up the bag of old toys and books that he and Seth had outgrown,
"Over by Hannah's playswing." He moved towards one standing in the corner by Lane,
"This one?"
"No! That's Josh's!" Lorelai answered in exasperation.
"Then, where's Hannah's?"
"By Rory. The pink one, not the blue one."
"Oh, we're color-discriminating by gender now?" Rory shook her head,
"No, no, haven't you heard? Orange is the new blue."
"And black is the new pink."
"Hannah's dressing retro-goth from now on." Ryan shook his head and dropped the toys before kissing Rory hello.
"Hello?" Taylor's head peeked around the corner, though he quickly disappeared, shielding his eyes as he saw the two teenagers kiss. Rory sighed as Lorelai answered,
"Go away."
"I have a full set of dishes."
"Come on in, Taylor." They heard Taylor hesitate before asking,
"Anything else happening in there that wouldn't be appropriate for television that isn't primetime or... questionable late night programming?" Lorelai's eyes went wide mockingly,
"You're doing porn? You never tell me anything!"
"Please cease and desist with the kissing, children." Rory, Seth, Ryan, and Lane all rolled their eyes,
"We've ceased," said the boys.
"And desisted," finished the girls.
"Well, good," Taylor rounded the corner.
"Oh, um, dishes in the kitchen, please," Lorelai told him, handing Josh to a reluctant Seth, who quickly passed him off into Lane's waiting arms.
"Ok, but I have to explain something first."
"Fine, go ahead," Kirsten said, a bit of frustration evident in her voice as she gave Lorelai yet another mystery object to inspect.
"The butter dish has a small chip in it."
"Safety tip, got it," said Lorelai, staring at the mystery object.
"It's fine. I filed down the chip and if you place it strategically on the table, nobody will ever know."
"Uh, Taylor, would you like to write out some sort of instruction manual to go with the dishes?" Lorelai asked, poking at the object, which, to her surprise, moved after she touched it. She gave a small "eek!" and dropped it on the floor, ignoring her daughter and her friends rolling with laughter behind her.
"Oh, could I?"
"Notepad's in the kitchen," Kirsten pointed through the door leading to the back of the house. As Taylor disappeared, Sookie reentered the room,
"Ok, you guys are gonna love me."
"We already love you."
"No, I mean you're really gonna love me."
"We do," Kirsten insisted; over the years, she had gotten close to Sookie through Lorelai.
"Trust me, you guys are gonna so love me."
"Ok, the love is starting to fade now, Sookie," Seth joked; Ryan hit him. Sookie stuck her tongue out at the boys and giggled excitedly,
"I have here in my hand, as requested by Mrs. Lorelai Danes, five fabulous tickets to the Bangles at the Pastorella theater on Saturday!"
"What?" Lorelai asked, her mouth agape. Kirsten's mouth dropped open also, and she only stared at the tickets in stunned silence.
"No?" Rory put down the Hungry Hungry Hippos she was holding and ran to her mother's side, Lane immediately at her side.
"Do you love me?"
"Oh baby, do I! You kick the husband out of first place!"
"Are these good seats? These look like good seats," Lane asked, bouncing with excitement, not noticing Josh imitating her from his Exersaucer.
"9th row, aisle.
"I can't believe you got me my tickets! Well, how did you score these?"
"Remember the Birnbaum wedding?"
"Fiji fantasy?"
"Oh, we all remember the Birnbaum's," breathed Ryan.
"The schnauzer in a bikini with a feather wreath around his head," Seth laughed.
"Yes. They were so thrilled with the volcano wedding cake that they wanted to do something nice for me and since Mr. Birnbaum runs a ticket agency and I knew you were dying to so, so I asked him if he could..."
"Make five girls very happy," Lorelai finished, a goofy grin overcoming her mouth.
"Yeah and he did!"
"Sook, lemme see," Kirsten held out her hands to see the tickets, and Sookie happily obliged.
"Huzzah for the Birnbaums!"
"Hey Sookie, if you got five tickets and you and mom and Kirsten go, then that means..." Sookie nodded emphatically,
"Mmhmm, one for you and one for Lane!" Lane threw her arms around Sookie, "Oh, chickadee!"
"This is gonna be a very special night. And you know what a very, very special night deserves?"
"What?" asked Kirsten, still not looking up from the tickets.
"A new outfit!" Lorelai said with a flourish as she pulled out a hot pink dress.
"Mom," Rory said, groaning.
"Yes?" Lorelai responded angelically.
"No."
"What could the problem be?"
"This is the tackiest..."
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"As I mentioned yesterday, we will be holding a debate next week. Your subject is 'Did Charles I receive a fair trial'. The pros will represent the parliament who deemed they had sovereignty and the cons will represent the monarch and try and prove that the charge against him was not legal," Something caught Ms. Caldecott's eye as she scanned the room, explaining the project from her desk, "What is fascinating, Mr. Dugrey?" Tristan looked up from staring at the back of Rory's head and tried desperately to prevent his cheeks from becoming any redder than they already were.
"Uh, nothing, Ms. Caldecott."
"Nothing, Mr. Dugrey?"
"My notes," he stuttered, "My notes are fascinating, Ms. Caldecott."
"Yes, they are fascinating, Mr. Dugrey. As I was saying, the pro and con teams will each have two minutes and 30 seconds for introductions, six minutes to debate, three minutes for conclusions and five minutes for questions from the audience. The winner shall be decided by a hand count from the rest of the class. Does that sound like fun, Mr. Dugrey?" Tristan blinked himself awake from his reverie,
"What?"
"The debate. Does it sound like fun?" Tristan shook his head and Rory smirked at his ignorance, unknowing of just what he was staring at.
"Yes, it does."
"It does, doesn't it, Mr. Dugrey?"
"Oh, it absolutely does, Ms. Caldecott."
"More fun than staring at Miss Danes' ear?"
"Yes, Ms. Caldecott." Rory blushed and sunk deeper into her chair, a mental groan growing louder in her head.
"Yeah, I think so too. Ok, any questions? Good, I'll assign your teams." The teacher walked up and down the aisles and pointed at people in groups of four, announcing their topics. Rory winced as she pointed to her group. Paris, however, followed the route of denial,
"Who did she point to?" Madeline looked confused,
"Well I think she..." She motioned to Louise and Rory with her eyes as Paris stood up,
"Excuse me, Ms. Caldecott?"
"Miss Geller?"
"I wasn't sure who you pointed to just now." Oh, yes you were.
"Oh, uh, let's see. You, Miss Lynn, Miss Grant and Miss Danes." Paris sighed and Rory's mental groan grew to the point where she thought it may leak out her ears for the class to hear.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am, but thank you for asking." Paris sat back down and continued to throw daggers out her eyes at Rory until the bell rang, when the four girls met in the hallway,
"So I guess we should make a plan," Rory suggested.
"To do what?" Madeline asked stupidly, to which Paris responded impatiently,
"To work out our debate Madeline."
"Oh, yeah right."
"We need a place to work."
"My house is out," Paris said immediately, prompting an anxious Louise to ask,
"Why?"
"Because it is."
"You need a reason."
"My mother is having the entire place redone, she wants all evidence of my father out of there. So unless you want to sit on no furniture, while watching three Harvey Fierstein impersonators rip up the carpet and paint everything a ridiculous shade of white and call it 'angel's kiss' then we're going to have to find somebody else's house to go to."
"My brother has the measels," Madeline announced, clutching her books.
"My mom's having an affair," Louise announced. Rory tried not to swing her head around too fast to look at Louise in shock at her aloofness about the subject. Thank you, Mom and Dad for raising me in Stars Hollow, where the nuts are nuts, but at least they're somewhat functional.
"Well I guess we can go to my house. I mean, we're having a town rummage sale, so it's kind of a mess, but it's there," Rory grudgingly admitted.
"Isn't your house kind of far?" Drive the Porsche your mom gave you to keep quiet about the affair.
"It's thirty minutes away by bus."
"Bus? I don't do 'bus'."
"Well if you have a better suggestion..." Rory felt her temper rising, but Paris cut her off,
"I'll drive."
"Ok, so then tomorrow."
"Tomorrow."
"Fine."
"Fine." Just as they were about to disperse, Tristan walked by,
"Hey, Paris." Rory was stunned (though thrilled) that Tristan had ignored her.
"Tristan, hi."
"You know, I was really hoping we'd be in the same group." Oh, c'mon, Paris might be mean, but she's not stupid. She knows what that means. "Oh, Paris, I'm sorry that I didn't get you to do my homework for me."
"You were?" Rory's hand instinctively went to her chin to prevent it from dropping to the floor.
"Oh yeah. I mean, it would make the long hours of studying go by a lot faster. Plus, come on - you and me on the same team, we'd wipe the floor with the others. I guess we'll just have to pair up on something else then, huh?"
"That would be good."
"Yeah, it would. I'll see you later. Bye Madeline, bye Louise." Rory shook her head, silently glad that Tristan hadn't acknowledged her (Though it made her mildly suspicious as well).
"Tristan suddenly has very big eyes for you, grandma," Louise mused, and Rory stifled a giggle.
"Lucky." Rory was watching the scene with interest and almost jumped as she felt a pair of arms snake around her waist. She looked over her shoulder to find Ryan, grinning contentedly.
"Hey," she greeted, ignoring the feverish whispers and disgruntled That's so not fairs behind her.
"Hi. Usually when I walk past here, you're gone."
"Oh, we were just discussing some details for this weekend."
"This weekend?"
"We have a debate to work on."
"Eugh," he started, but stopped as he recognized the Shut up look on his girlfriend's face, "How did you get so... lucky," he stuttered, "to be put with Paris, Louise, and Madeline."
"Can it, Romeo," Paris spat, "C'mon, Louise, Madeline, we need to get to class." As the girls (their mood effectively ruined by Ryan and Rory's display of affection) stalked off to class, Ryan and Rory began walking in the other direction,
"You got stuck with them?"
"Yeah."
"I'm sorry." Rory sighed,
"Not your fault. The only problem is that now we can't even celebrate your first day off of probation together."
"What? Why not?"
"Tomorrow. They're coming tomorrow. And then tomorrow night, I have the Bangles concert. I was gonna spend the day with you, watching movies and stuff."
"Oh, Ror, it's ok."
"No, it's not. And I'm not even gonna be home to watch with you tomorrow night, and it should be good." Ryan looked at her, perplexed, before he realized what she meant,
"Oh, Ror, that's ok. Trust me, Fred Armisen will dress up as Ferecito again."
"No, knowing my luck, they'll kill off Ferecito in Weekend Update tomorrow. They won't believe he's just kidding."
"Stop being Debbie Downer."
"No. I'm Rory Day-Wrecker."
"Creative."
"I thought so."
"Tell you what. Sunday, we'll hang out, watch reruns on E, and have my 'Probation-be-gone' celebration. Ok?" She sighed,
"Ok."
"Besides," Ryan reasoned, "The show hasn't really been the same since Ferrell left."
"Some argue since Adam Sandler and Dana Carvey left."
"Well, Ferrell was the last shred of classic."
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"Hello?" Jess grabbed his cell phone off of his night table.
"Hey, this is Billy Madison. I'm calling to say that, if in high school, I did anything to hurt you or offend you, I'm sorry," a girly voice responded.
"Hey, Ally. What's up?"
"Nothing. Too much homework..."
"I know how you feel. I don't think they ever covered King Lear on The Brady Bunch."
"No, they did that one episode where they read the poem at the parents/kids night, and Marcia and Carol sang the song dressed as hoboes, but nothing springs to mind about 'Fair is foul and foul is fair.'"
"Hey, pretty good." He heard the strain in her voice as she admitted,
"I feel like I never get to see you anymore."
"I know... I'm sorry."
"It's just, with different schools, and being busy with the twins, and your adoption, and work, I have no idea who you are and what you're up to. I couldn't pick you out of a crowd of dark-haired, dangerous-looking teenage boys if I wanted to."
"Yes, you could. I'd be the one with the spit-up rag on my shoulder and a baby sibling in each arm."
"I'm serious, Jess." He laughed maniacally,
"Sadly, so am I."
"I called for a reason, believe it or not. Do you want to hear it, or do you want to tell me about how Hannah's spit-up is more projectile than Josh's?" Jess made a gagging noise from the back of his throat,
"That was absolutely disgusting, Ally. Hold on a second while I vomit, and then tell me what you called for." She rolled her eyes,
"What are you doing tomorrow night?"
"Why, Miss Leigh, I'm flattered, but I already have plans," Jess said in a falsetto voice.
"Jess, stop it. What are you really doing?"
"I really have plans."
"With who?" She was shocked to hear that her boyfriend was being honest; he had made plans without telling her?
"My friends from school."
"Who?"
"My friends. Charlie, Emory, and Early." The lunch-period meeting between Jess, Emory, Charlie, and Early had gone quite well; Jess found he had a lot in common with these kids, and found them easy to talk to. Every day since then, they'd greeted each other in the hallway, met up to talk during lunch twice, and exchanged screennames.
He'd had such breakthroughs that he'd realized that Emory was only so talkative around new people, because Charlie and Early were so shy. Ella, he corrected himself, She lets me call her Ella now. Now that they all knew each other, Emory had toned it down a little bit, and the other two were more open with him, talking much more. Well, Ella does. Charlie... He grinned.
In all of their debates, Charlie responded with one-to-two-word answers and grunts.
Family Guy vs. The Simpsons? Family Guy.
Sneakers vs Sandals? Sneakers.
Chocolate vs. Vanilla? Chocolate/Vanilla twist.
He knew he had more work to do before cracking Charlie, but he didn't mind; he was just glad to have friends at Chilton outside of the Kelly Road Posse (None of the others had accomplished that feat to such an extent).
"Jess, who are Emory and Charlie, and why are they early?"
"Her name is Early. My friend. And she and Emory and Charlie are people I met at Chilton- nice people, who are willing to talk to me without that little red glint in their eye that seems to appear in most Chilton kids' eyes before they hit me with a pie."
"So, you're doing something with them tomorrow?"
"They're coming over. I invited them."
"Oh," Ally sounded disappointed, "Listen, my mom's calling me. I have to go," Jess strained and listened, but couldn't hear anyone's voice in the background, "Maybe next weekend, then?"
"Sure. Maybe next weekend."
"Bye, Jess."
"Bye, Al. Lo..." The click of the phone cut him off before he got a chance to finish his thought.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"Rory, I think your friends are here," Lorelai said, peeking through the window, "She must be one great babysitter to earn enough money for that car." Rory sighed,
"Let's just get this over with."
"Take heart, my dear. Suffer today, party tonight," Lorelai opened the door with a flourish and greeted, "Hi."
"Hi," said Madeline and Louise; Paris responded with a scowl.
"Come on in."
"So, did you guys find it ok?"
"There's no sign on this street," Paris griped.
"I know," Rory started, but Lorelai cut her off,
"Yeah, some neighborhood kids had a game of tag that got way too out of hand a couple years back. It fell over." Rory shot her mother a warning glance; the day that she, Seth, Ryan, Lane, and Jess had planned on playing "Extreme Tag", the pole went down. The exact details were never divulged to the town, but it was well-known among the Kelly Road Posse that it was the kids who'd knocked it down. To be discreet, they told people that a stray dog and a runaway wagon were to be blamed.
"That's why I told you to turn right at the big rooster statue," Rory told them.
"I thought you were kidding."
"Oh no, we never kid about Monty." They heard footsteps approach the front door and Luke's voice explain,
"Well, I do, but the girls don't." He stood behind his wife and daughter, smiling slightly at the girls.
"Who's Monty?"
"Monty the rooster... Monty."
"Oh."
"Everybody, this is my mom and dad."
"Lorelai. And Luke."
"This is Louise, Madeline, and Paris."
"Ah, very good girl-group names," Luke rolled his eyes, "Ok, so, um sorry about the house of horrors here. Some crazy lady volunteered to lead this charity thing and we're trying to get her some help, so make yourselves comfortable. Rory, just yell when you guys want pizza."
The girls decided to work in the living room, but Luke and Lorelai stayed put.
"I'm going to the market. Do you need anything?"
"We could use more diapers. And pineapple juice."
"Pineapple juice?"
"Yes, pineapple juice. It's healthy and lately, I've just really wanted it," she scrunched up her nose and her husband rolled her eyes.
"You're an odd one."
"What? You don't want me to drink pineapple juice? Fine, then just get me more Twinkies and Pop Tarts. The s'mores kind, preferably."
"No, no," Luke answered, his eyes going wide, "I'll get you pineapple juice. And pineapples. I'll get you a pineapple hat, if you want. It's healthy."
"Aw, that's sweet. And slightly weird. I'll be happy with just the pineapple juice, thanks."
"I'll be back to bring the car back tonight."
"Ok." They kissed goodbye,
"I love you."
"You, too." Luke left and Lorelai went upstairs to her room to check out the growing pile of old pictures and games left homeless by the flood of items overflowing her living room.
Louise and Madeline shared an impressed, if not shocked glance,
"Rory, how long have your parents been married?" Rory, taken aback at the question, worked the math in her head,
"Umm... twelve years. Why?"
"Twelve years... wow... that's insane," commented Madeline.
"It's amazing how the heart works," mused Louise.
"What?" asked Rory, watching Paris leaf through her notes.
"Your parents. They act like that all the time?"
"Like what?"
"Kissing and joking and... talking."
"Um, yeah. Pretty much every day."
"Fascinating."
"Wait," Madeline said, realization dawning on her for the first time, "Your parents have been married twelve years?"
"Yeah."
"But you're sixteen."
"Yes."
"So, you're..."
"Adopted," Rory finished quietly; she hated discussing this topic, "by my dad."
"By your dad?"
"Yeah. My mom had me, met my dad, they got married, he adopted me. End of story." Madeline, using her last shred of intuition, sensed that this was a touchy subject and let it drop. Paris interjected somewhat loudly (she had let actual conversation get in the way for long enough),
"Ok, so here's how it should go. Madeline will do the introductions, I'll handle the debate, Rory will do the conclusion and Louise will take questions."
"Why do you automatically get to handle the debate?"
"Because I'm the most experienced at it." Madeline looked at Rory with utter confidence,
"Trust me, you want her to handle the debate. She never gives up."
"Le pitbull," Louise agreed.
"Ok."
"So what is all this stuff?" Louise asked, going through the bag seated next to her.
"Uh, it's for a big town rummage sale."
"Like a charity thing?"
"Yeah. There's this old bridge that's completely falling apart and the town's trying to save it."
"Oh, cool hat."
"Put that down. It's used," Paris snapped.
"Vintage, dear."
"Filthy, darling."
"There's this great store under my therapist office who has the best vintage clothes. I found an original Pucci top for practically nothing," mentioned Madeline.
"Oh Pucci is very big right now," Louise agreed.
"Is this a Pucci?" asked Madeline, holding up a shirt.
"No, that's a patty."
"A patty?"
"Miss Patty. She's a dance teacher here. These are some of her old costumes." Louise held a pink sequined dress up to her body,
"Oh here, Paris. Tristan might like this." Paris looked upset and exasperatedly pleaded,
"Can we just work, please?"
"Ugh. I would love to have a boyfriend that looked like Tristan." Madeline looked pointedly at Rory,
"Your boyfriend's no slouch either."
"No, he's not."
"Oh, yes. Blonde and gorgeous. Granted, he's not the tallest, but it'll do. Muscles all around... So, how's that going? Are you two still 'Joanie loves Chachi'?" Rory rolled her eyes discreetly; You saw us in the hallway yesterday. What do you think has changed?
"G-d, I hope not."
"You're sickeningly cute together."
"Um... thank you?"
"How long has it been?"
"I don't know."
"You do, too."
"Well... we've been friends since we were six and he moved here... he lives next door. So, it's debated by our parents when we actually started going out. Our moms say when we were seven, his dad says since the day we've met, my dad's still in denial that I have a boyfriend at all..."
"What do you two say?"
"About two years."
"Two years!"
"Wow, small town, big romances."
"Hey!" Paris interjected. Madeline rubbed at her ear,
"Jeez."
"We have a debate to organize here and this conversation is quickly veering towards the subject of french kissing and glitter eye shadow - trashy or trendy? And I for one have no intention of being humiliated in front of the whole class because we were forced to study in the middle of a carnival and you two couldn't keep your eye on the prize! I want to win and I'm going to win." They were all silent for a moment before Louise asked,
"So, how good of a kisser is he, anyway?" Rory, Louise, and Madeline all giggled, but Rory was secretly embarrassed to share that private information. Luckily she was saved by Kirsten descending the stairs quickly, holding Hannah.
"Ror, I have to go pick up Seth. Your mom says to take your sister and just put her in the swing, if you will. She'll..."
"Fall asleep. I know."
"Ok."
"Hey, Kirsten?" Rory said, standing up and taking the baby from Kirsten, "Tell Seth I need to talk to him about tomorrow."
"What's tomorrow?"
"We made..." she glanced at the three girls sitting at her table, discussing the pros and cons of using note cards in presentation, "umm... plans. To... celebrate." Kirsten laughed,
"Nothing too destructive, ok?"
"Hey, if you tell me, you have to tell them all," Rory laughed.
"Oh, I plan on it," Kirsten looked around with confusion, "Where's my..."
"Keys?" Rory cut her off, "Right here."
"Thanks. I'll see you tonight." Kirsten ran out the front door and Louise turned to Rory,
"What's tonight?"
"We've got tickets to see the Bangles at the Pastorella theatre."
"In New York?"
"Yeah."
"Sounds potentially not boring." Oh, the biggest of compliments from Louise. Headway. I'm making headway.
"It's gonna be great, actually and the seats are amazing." This isn't bragging, right?
"Who are you going with?"
"My mom, Kirsten, their friend Sookie, and my friend Lane."
"Lane? Is she that really tall girl in my fourth-period Psych class?" No, but she'd love to take a psychological stab at you. That'd be fun.
"Not likely. She goes to Stars Hollow High."
"Wait. You're going with your mom?"
"You're kidding?"
"What?"
"You're going to a concert with your mom?"
"Yeah."
"I cannot imagine doing anything like that with my mom."
"Actually, we do stuff like this all the time."
"Really?" Rory still had Hannah in her arms, so she moved to put her in her pink playswing.
"Yeah. I mean, it's not necessarily always just us. Jess will come sometimes, and now we have Hannah and Josh to bring with us."
"Hannah and Josh?"
"My sister and baby brother. That's Hannah," she said, putting Hannah's pacifier in her mouth.
"Oh. How old are they?"
"They're about five months... I mean, my mom's still young, so, it's not so weird... Do you want to hold her?"
"No. I don't do babies," Louise grunted.
"Me neither," agreed Paris. Madeline looked concerned,
"I dropped my brother once when he was a baby. I haven't been the same since."
"Hey, how old are your parents anyways?"
"Well, my dad's thirty-five. My mom's thirty-two."
"Young."
"So that means she had you when she was..." Paris, frustrated with the turn of the conversation, interjected,
"Sixteen. She had her when she was sixteen. We've done the math, can we just 'ooh' and 'aah' about this quickly and get back to work?"
"Sixteen. I'm sixteen," Louise mused. She can count! Thank Sesame Street. Sixteen, whawhawha, sixteen years.
"So am I."
"We're all sixteen, ok? Everybody in this room is sixteen. Except baby blue-eyes over there. She's not."
"Paris is right. We should work."
"Thank you."
"I can't imaging having a baby at sixteen," said Louise.
"Well, then keep your knees shut."
"Very nice."
"Do you think your mom is sorry she got pregnant so young?"
"Of course she is." What the hell...
"Why, thank you."
"I didn't meant that. I just meant that..."
"I mean, I don't think she would recommend it, but I think she's happy with how things turned out."
"I am?" Lorelai asked as she descended the stairs, holding Josh.
"Yes, you are."
"Ok, just checking... Hey, I'm starving, is it pizza time yet?" She asked, handing Joshua to Rory, who turned to her classmates,
"Are you guys hungry?"
"I am."
"I can't eat dairy," grunted Paris.
"Ok, one with cheese, one without. Cokes?"
"Yes, please."
"Me too."
"We're never going to finish," moaned Paris as Louise ignored her, Lorelai walking into the kitchen,
"I find your mother completely fascinating."
"Funny, so does she."
"It's almost more like having a big sister."
"And you like her, don't you?" Rory nodded,
"She's my best friend."
"And what about your dad? You must at least dislike him."
"Umm... no. I mean, maybe I just... appreciate him more because of the way that he became my dad, but I spend a lot of nights helping him, watching movies with him."
"Truly, completely fascinating."
"Rory, come in here a sec!" came Lorelai's voice from the kitchen.
"I'll be right back." Rory stood up and ran into the kitchen.
"Hey, how's it going in there?"
"Truly, completely fascinating," Rory joked, picking up a grape and throwing it into her mouth.
"Really?"
"Well, we've basically gotten no work down at all. Paris is having a meltdown, which, by the way, is always fun."
"Sounds it."
"And, I don't know, we've just been talking."
"Well, I think you're actually making some friends here."
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves. They've basically just moved off the plan to dump the pig's blood on me at the prom, that's all."
"Talking, chatting, no work being done - there's friend potential going on." Rory thought to Paris' reactions to any time that she mentioned her family life or boyfriend,
"Maybe - with Louise and Madeline at least."
"Two out or three formerly psychotic enemies - not bad. There," Lorelai said, handing Rory a plate, "pop-tart appetizers to tide you over till the pizza comes."
"Thanks," Rory turned to leave, but Lorelai stopped her,
"Hey, I have kind of a crazy idea."
"Should I call Daddy and have him get the hospital on hold before anything happens?"
"Just consider this, ok?" Rory sighed,
"Ok."
"Now, we have five tickets to the show tonight."
"Yes, we do."
"What if I give them to you? You take them."
"What are you talking about?"
"Well, it just seems like you guys have kind of a bonding thing going on in there, and it might be fun."
"But what about you?"
"No, no, you and I have already bonded. In fact, if we bond any further, we will be permanently fused together."
"You've been talking about this concert since you heard about it."
"I can still go." Rory shook her head,
"How?"
"Sookie and I can buy cheap seats when we get there."
"These tickets are 9th row aisle - dream seats."
"Look, you don't have to do this, but I just think you have three years of Chilton ahead of you and it might be nice to have some friendly type people to talk to there other than your brother, your boyfriend, and the friend you've had since you were six."
"Thanks for making me feel popular, mom." Lorelai shook her head,
"You know what I mean. And I don't know, you guys seem to be getting along, it might be good. And I totally don't mind, I just want to see the show, I don't care from what seat." Rory narrowed her eyes,
"Are you sure?"
"Completely sure."
"Because I..." Lorelai cut her off with a wave and a flourish, rushing into the den with the plate,
"Oh, ladies!" Rory shook her head in disbelief. Only Lorelai. "Hey what are you guys doing tonight?"
"Why?"
"Well, we have these really great tickets to see the Bangles at the Pastorella theater and Rory thought you might like to come along." Rory shook her head. No, my insane mother thought you might, but potato, po-tah-to.
"Are you serious?" Madeline gasped as Louise's mouth fell open,
"No way." Rory snapped back to life,
"Yeah... I mean, if you guys want to."
"I would love to go," Madeline chimed.
"Count me in," nodded Louise. Rory turned to Cruella DeVille herself,
"Paris, what about you?"
"I can't." Louise rolled her eyes,
"Yes, you can."
"No, I can't."
"Because you're busy doing what?"
"I have homework." Madeline turned to Rory,
"She'll be there."
"Good," said Rory. Rory shook her head,
"Great."
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Jess hurried around to get everything organized in his room; though the rest of the house was in a state of absolute squalor and disarray, he needed to clean his room for his friends, who were coming over within a few minutes. Rushing to accomplish everything he'd been hoping to, he stubbed his toe and uttered a dirty word under his breath, his face contorting into a twisted grimace. He looked over to find Hannah, dressed in only a white t-shirt and a diaper, propped up in a bouncy seat, smiling at the face he was making,
"Think that's funny, do you, Miss Danes?" He strode over to her and picked her up, holding her above his head and tossing her gently. He pulled her to his body again as he heard the doorbell ring, and he dashed up the stairs to greet his friends from school.
As he pulled the door open quickly with his free left hand, Hannah yawned quietly in his right.
"Hey guys," he greeted as the open door revealed his three friends; Jess marveled at how different they looked outside of their school clothes. Emory wore a thin black tank top, a red zip-up hoodie unzipped on top of it, black jeans, and a red studded belt, her straight blonde hair french-braided in two parts. Charlie wore khaki shorts and a checkered blue button-up t-shirt. Ella sported a black t-shirt which, on the front, had a picture of "Newman", a speech bubble reading "Hello, Jerry" (he would later learn that the back read "Hello, Newman" in bold letters) and capri pants, her pink flip-flops clicking as she bounced in the cool night air, fixing her wildly-curled ponytail.
"He... Oh my gosh! Who is this cutie?" Emory greeted before interrupting herself.
"Oh. This my sister Hannah."
"Hi, cutie pie," Ella cooed, leaning down to tickle Hannah's belly. Both girls squealed with delight as the baby giggled loudly. Jess shifted her to his other arm before he heard Charlie cough purposefully.
"Oh, right, come in." They came through the door and Jess shut it behind them with his free hand.
"So, this is my house," Jess announced, trying hard not to sound too anxious; it was rare (in fact, damn near never) that he have someone over his house who needed a tour. The only people he'd ever really hung out with outside of school were Seth, Ryan, Lane, and Rory, none of whom needed a tour, and Ally, who had needed the tour once, when they were thirteen, "It's a, uh, a bit messy right now."
"I hadn't noticed," said Emory wryly; Jess sniggered,
"Yeah, my mom is hosting a charity rummage sale. The house isn't usually like this, but it's mom's responsibility. As of tomorrow, this'll all be out of the house."
Lorelai came running down the stairs, Josh, fully clad in pajamas, in hand.
"I heard the doorbell ring. Who was there?"
"It's my friends, mom." Lorelai grinned warmly at the teens,
"Oh, hi, I'm Lorelai. I'm Jess' mom."
"Hi, it's nice to meet you. I'm Emory, this is my boyfriend Charlie."
"And I'm Ella."
"Ella. What a pretty name. We actually considered naming Hannah 'Michelle' and just calling her 'Elle,' but then 'Hannah' just stuck... is your name short for anything?"
"Early."
"Early? Really? I've never heard that name before."
"Most people haven't." Lorelai grinned at the girl and turned to Jess,
"Rory and I are going in a few minutes."
"Oh, where are you going?" asked Emory, her ever-present curious glint evident in her eyes.
"We're going to a Bangles reunion concert."
"Oh, cool."
"I thought so," she turned to Jess again, "Take your brother," Jess extended his free arm and took Joshua, "I'm gonna go finish getting ready," she waved politely to Jess' friends, "It's nice to have met you."
"You too."
"Have fun at the concert."
"Thanks," Lorelai ran back up the stairs.
"So that's your mom?"
"That's Lorelai."
"She's..."
"Energetic," Jess finished.
"Yup."
"She seems sweet."
"I like her," Jess shrugged as he heard the back door open.
"Hello. Anybody home?" came Luke's gruff voice.
"Den!" The eldest Danes rounded the corner,
"Hi, everybody." Jess could've sworn he heard Charlie's deep voice joke Hi, Dr. Nick. He did a double-take and shook it off. Charlie? Make a joke? Never.
"Guys, this is my dad Luke."
"It's nice to meet you, Mr. Danes," Ella said politely.
"Please, it's Luke."
"Oh, ok."
"Dad, what are you doing home?"
"I needed to get the truck home for your mom."
"You're taking the SUV?"
"Lorelai thinks it's too uncool to show up at a Bangles concert in an SUV.
"Of course." Lorelai and Rory bounded down the stairs.
"Hi, honey," Lorelai greeted, kissing her husband on the lips quickly.
"Hi, daddy," said Rory, kissing her father's cheek as she played with the dangling earrings she'd borrowed from her mother.
"Hi, girls. You're ready to go?"
"Yeah. Lane's at Kirsten's with Seth, so we're gonna pick them both up first, and then we're gonna pick up Sookie, and we're gonna meet the other girls at the theater." Rory looked at her classmates,
"Hi."
"Hey... you're in our Health class, right?" Rory nodded and gave a half-smile,
"Yeah. The new girl who sits in the back."
"I feel bad that that's become your name," Emory told her.
"Ms. Hassell will learn my name eventually... I hope."
"Yeah, she does that with everyone. She knows all about the difference between the different STIs, but when it comes to whether you're Emory or Early, she calls you Kaitlyn."
"Yeah, I saw that. For some reason, when she doesn't call me 'New girl in the back,' she calls me Arlene." Ella, Early, and Rory all giggled; Charlie cracked a small smile, but quickly covered it up, acting as though it was a cough. To everyone's surprise, he mentioned,
"For some reason, she remembered my name before anyone else's. Granted, I was 'Mike' for a week and a half, but it all ended up ok." Everyone laughed and Lorelai looked at her watch,
"Oh, Rory, we should go. We're gonna be late otherwise."
"Ok." Lorelai took Hannah from Jess and kissed her on the forehead,
"Bye, baby. I love you. Be good for Jess, ok?" When Hannah giggled, Lorelai said, "Ok. Bye-bye, Banana." Luke rolled his eyes,
"Do you have to call her Banana?"
"I don't have to. I could call her walnut-head, like I did with Rory."
"Hey now, that's not nice," Rory pouted. Lorelai shook her head,
"Her name is Hannah. It's a given that she be called 'Banana'... Luke, could you..." Luke cut her off,
"Change her into pajamas? Sure. Gimme." He took his youngest daughter from his wife, who quickly put her head affectionately on Luke's shoulder. He rubbed her back patiently as she hiccupped quietly. Lorelai turned to Jess and Josh,
"Bye, Joshy-boy. Mommy loves you," She kissed the back of his head affectionately as the baby held his head up and began to reach around, as if trying to get to his mother. Lorelai grinned and pulled the baby out of Jess' arms; he smiled as he saw his mommy's grinning face. Lorelai then turned to Jess, "Ok, there's money for pizza on the table, I stocked up on junk food, and if you're gonna go out, call dad and let him..." Jess blushed at the last part,
"Mom! I know. Go. Have fun." Lorelai sighed,
"Ok." Rory kissed the twins each on the back of their heads and kissed her father's cheek again,
"Bye, guys. Nice to see you again."
"You, too." Lorelai turned to the kids, handing Joshua back to Jess,
"Nice meeting you."
"Likewise." Luke, with his free hand, opened the front door to the house, handing Lorelai the car keys,
"Have fun. Be safe," he said, staring nervously at both of his girls.
"We'll be fine, daddy."
"Just... be careful, ok?"
"I'll be fine, dad."
"Ok. I just..." Lorelai cut him off,
"She'll be fine." Luke sighed,
"Ok. Enjoy the show." Rory nodded,
"Bye, everybody." As Rory and Lorelai stepped out the door, Luke turned to Jess,
"Could you put him in his swing?"
"Well, yeah, but we're going down to my room."
"So, then, could you bring it downstairs with you?" Jess nodded,
"Sure," He turned to his friends as Luke disappeared up the stairs, Hannah in hand, "Ella, could you hold him?" Ella nodded reluctantly,
"Umm... sure..." she extended her arms and Jess strategically deposited Joshua into them, "Do I have to... support his head... or something?" Jess shook his head,
"No, he can hold his own head up. Just watch his back, cuz he'll lose control and lean back sometimes and that's not good." Ella, a panicked look on her face, quickly brought her other hand up to the baby's back.
"Ella, he's a baby, not a bomb," Emory joked.
"Shut up."
"Hold him like a football," mocked Emory.
"Hey, now, that's enough Friends quotes for the night, thanks." Jess laughed. At least they understand.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
At the concert, later that night, everything had been going along well; Louise and Madeline had opened up more around Rory, and Paris was even behaving herself in a manner conducive to living with other humans. Lane had even been able to enjoy herself around the "Chilton Elite." Lorelai, Kirsten, and Sookie, secluded to the nosebleed seats available at the door, had called once to check in on Rory, and Luke had called three times; on the third call, Lane picked up the phone, answering with a,
"Mike and Mike's house of music. If you wish it, we dish it. How can I help you?"
It wasn't until Louise and Madeline returned to their seats from talking to guys two rows back that Rory and Lane realized what they were up against.
"Oh my G-d! He is so gorgeous." Rory shrugged,
"I guess."
"Listen, there's a massive party going on right around the corner."
"So?" asked Lane, oblivious to the innerworkings of the mind of a Chilton Socialite.
"So they invited us." Lane and Rory stole a skeptical glance,
"Who?"
"Jeff and Sean. We've been talking to them this whole time; they're extremely cool."
"Are we going?" added Madeline excitedly.
"Going where?" Lane and Rory asked together.
"To the party?" Rory pointed out the obvious,
"There's a concert going on."
"The band won't miss us." Lane decidedly shut her mouth as Rory protested,
"We can't just leave, Louise."
"It's America, Rory."
"We have to meet my mom after the show."
"Oh, come on."
"What do you mean 'Oh come on'? We have to meet my mother after the concert. The band may not miss us but Lorelai sure will." Lane sniggered and whispered so only Rory could hear it,
"And Luke would be... not so thrilled. In fact, you would never be let out of the house again." Rory nodded subtly as Madeline, oblivious to the side-conversation, added,
"These guys are so cute."
"Oh, that's great, but we're not going anywhere."
"What, are you afraid?" Rory scoffed and Lane nodded as she protested,
"Of going out into a strange city with two guys I don't know? Yeah."
"Rory, please!" Rory shook her head vehemently,
"No!" Louise stood up, shooting the Stars Hollow girls a dirty look,
"Well, we're going."
"No you're not," Rory protested. Louise ignored her,
"Paris, join please?" Paris kept her eyes glued on the stage,
"No, thanks."
"Fine. C'mon Madeline." Rory, almost yelling, asked over Walk Like an Egyptian,
"And just what am I supposed to tell my mother?" Louise narrowed her eyes at the petite brunette,
"That you're a very good little girl." Louise briskly walked away as Rory called out,
"Louise!" Madeline, always oblivious, added,
"The party's in a building on the corner of Waverly and First. Try to get away." Weakly, Rory called out,
"Madeline..."
"We'll be back by the time the concert's over." As Rory and Lane exchanged skeptically knowing glances, Paris mused next to them,
"You know, I really like this band."
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By 9:30 that night, things had been going quite well for Jess and his new companions. They sat, watched classic movie duds with easy mockability (Gigli and Glitter were among the movie choices for the night), and gorged on junk food.
By the time Luke had left, an hour and a half after his wife and daughter, Joshua was already asleep in his swing, and Hannah, now freshly changed into warm pink bunny pajamas (a gift from the Cohens; Kirsten loved shopping for baby clothes at any opportunity), had been gurgling happily in her own, watching the teenagers horse around.
Even Charlie had lightened up. He cracked amusing jokes during the movies (If you switched J.Lo and Mariah Carey into each others' movies, do you think anyone would know the difference? and Ben Affleck's hair reminds me, Em, I need to change the oil on your car.)
When the back doorbell rang, Jess excused himself and ran upstairs to the kitchen, pulling the door open to reveal Ally.
"Hey," he greeted, kissing her sweetly, "I wasn't expecting you... was I expecting you?" Ally shook her head,
"No, uh, Rory told me that I need to read America: the Book, so I came to get it." Jess grinned,
"Which copy do you want?"
"Huh?"
"Which copy? We have my copy, Rory's copy, and my parents' copy."
"You have three copies of the same book?"
"Well, technically four. We keep Lane's copy here as a safety precaution in case of a Mrs. Kim raid."
"What makes that so dangerous?"
"Pages ninety-nine to one-hundred." Ally narrowed her eyes,
"What's on ninety-nine and one-hundred?"
"Oh, my dear, you must read and see." Jess turned and grabbed his copy off of the kitchen counter, where he'd left it earlier that morning,
"Here you go. You can borrow my copy."
"Thank you kindly, gentle sir." Jess cocked his head to one side,
"I never want to hear you say that again." Ally smiled, but it disappeared as she saw Emory appear through the door to the kitchen,
"Jess?" Jess turned around quickly,
"Oh, hey, Em... Emory, this is my girlfriend Ally. Ally, this is Emory."
"Nice to meet you," Ally said politely, a false smile pulling at her lips.
"Yeah, you too... Jess, Hannah's crying and we don't know why. We thought you might be able to figure it out." Jess smirked,
"Yeah, I'll be down in a sec," As Emory disappeared down the stairs, Jess turned back to Ally, "C'mon in." Ally shook her head,
"No, no, I, um... my mom wants me home." Jess looked deep into her eyes. She was lying. He didn't know why, but she was lying. Deciding it was better not to pry, he asked,
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, um, I should get home... I'll call you later?"
"Sure." She kissed him half-heartedly and turned, skulking home. Without an "I love you".
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"Well?" Paris tapped her foot impatiently as Lane fidgeted with her belt buckle.
"I couldn't find Mom, Sookie, or Kirsten anywhere." The concert had been over for twenty minutes and the girls who had remained were waiting obediently in front of the entrance; Louise and Madeline had yet to return.
"So, what do we do now?"
"I guess we just wait here for them to find us," Lane mused.
"Ok."
"I can't believe Louise and Madeline would just leave like that," Rory sighed.
"They've done it before." Lane scoffed,
"Nice."
"Yeah, well." Suddenly, Rory felt an urge to bring up Tristan. Paris explained that she understood him, albeit admitting that he was probably only flirting with her lately to get to Rory. Just as the conversation elevated, the three adults were spotted.
"Hey."
"There you are."
"Think fast! T-shirts for all the girls because I'm the good witch of the..." Lorelai said, tossing a t-shirt to each girl, pausing as she realized that she had two extras, "Hey, aren't you missing a couple of kids?" Rory sighed, and Lane answered,
"They left."
"Excuse me?" asked Kirsten incredulously.
"Madeline and Louise met these guys and they..." explained Rory.
"What guys?"
"I don't know, they were sitting behind us and they were having a party."
"Unbelievable! Let's go, come on, move." Lorelai said, ushering them to the car.
Fifteen minutes later, they arrived at an apartment building, Lorelai ranting,
"I leave the house with four girls, I'm coming home with four girls." She, Kirsten, and Sookie began knocking on random doors, asking people if they'd seen the girls. Paris stared gawking,
"She's gonna knock on every door in the entire building, isn't she?"
"Yep," nodded Lane.
"Wow."
"I wonder if I was missing if my mom would come looking for me like that," Paris said sadly.
"Paris, you know she would."
"Yeah, or at least she'd send somebody." As Lorelai knocked on another door, Sookie called out,
"Music."
"Let's go." A guy answered the door and Rory stepped up closer behind her mother,
"Mom, that's one of the guys."
"Yeah?" said the guy.
"Thanks. Hi, could you move please?" Kirsten stood with an arm around Lane and Rory each, Sookie touching Lane's shoulder as Lorelai pushed through into the apartment as the guy looked perplexed,
"What?"
"Hey, did you miss me?"
"Lorelai," jumped Louise.
"Mrs. Danes. Put the cups down, let's move."
"Is there a problem?" asked the clueless guy.
"Yeah, see those two idiots over there? They're 16- underage, and I bet you're not. I also bet those big fancy party cups aren't holding lemonade. You really want to end any further conversations with me, so step aside, Skippy." Lorelai turned on Louise and Madeline, "Move your asses outside - now!"
After they'd stepped outside, Lorelai turned on the two girls, Kirsten holding Lane, Rory, and Paris back.
"Hey. I am not even going to begin to tell you how completely insane it is to take off with anyone you don't know, or drink things that you don't know what's in them, or act like you have a clue when you don't, but so help me G-d if you ever pull a stunt like this again, it will not be around my kid! Do you understand me?" Louise and Madeline's eyes went wide,
"Yes," they both said.
"Good, now let's go. I can't wait to meet your parents. We have some catching up to do. I think we'll just talk and talk and talk all night long."
"You know what?" smiled Paris as they walked down the hallway, Louise and Madeline's heads hanging, "I think this is the best night I've ever had."
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Rory, Lane, Seth, and Ryan stood together at the charity rummage sale, Seth whining about how he hadn't gone to the concert,
"I cannot believe I missed it."
"The concert was amazing." Ryan grinned,
"Forget about the concert. I wanted to see Lorelai pull those idiots out of that guy's apartment." Lane laughed,
"It definitely was a Kodak moment." Rory sighed,
"I still can't believe you're off of house arrest."
"Rory, stop it."
"No, I mean, seriously, like, I thought I'd never see you out of a Chilton uniform ever again. You look good out of a sweater."
"Rory..." Ryan glared at her warningly.
"I mean, granted, you look good in anything..." He silenced her with a kiss,
"You done?"
"Quite, thank you... We need a movie night..."
"Why?"
"Because I need fictional stupid people to do fictional stupid things."
"Oh," moaned Seth, "But real stupid people doing real stupid things is so much more interesting."