A/n: I hope you like it. My other story will be online soon but I'm taking off a few of my other stories.
CHAPTER 6: Emotionless
Johnny's POV
The funerals were on the same day. They were all buried next to each other, like J.T. asked. This brought Socs and Greasers together. They saw both sides. Jake walked over to me.
"Listen. I read the note that J.T. wrote. I'm agreeing to give Dally the mustang, since I got my own Corvette, and I'll let you guys share the house out in South side but I'm still gonna live in it," Jake stated.
"That's fine," I stated.
"You are Johnny right?" Jake asked.
"Ya. I am."
"My sister really liked you." That brought back the memory of the note she wrote me while me and the others were at Jay Mountain. Jake walked off and Two-Bit walked over to me.
"You okay?"
"Ya. I'm fine," I lied.
"She'd want you to live your life," Toni said and she and Ponyboy walked over.
"I loved her and I never got to tell her that," I sighed.
"She knew that in her heart though," Ponyboy stated as we walked away. That last statement brought tears to my eyes. I remembered her, always preppy, always up for anything.
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Jake's POV
I still can't believe my dad killed my brothers, my sister, my mom, and my step-dad. I finally knew how to vent my rage. I sat down, with a pen and paper, and slowly the words that I've wanted to say to my father since my family died.
'Hey dad, I'm writing to you, not to tell you, that I still hate, just to ask you how you feel, and how we fell apart, how this fell apart, are you happy out there in this great wide world, do you think about your sons, do you miss your little girl, when you lay your head down, how do you sleep at night, do you even wonder if we're alright, if we're alright, it's been a long hard road without you by my side, why weren't you there all the nights we cried, you broke my mother's heart, you broke your children for life, it's not okay, but we're alright, I remember the days you were a hero in my eyes, but those are just a long lost memory of mine, I spent so many years learning how to survive, and now I'm writing just to let you know I'm still alive, the days I spent so cold, so hungry, were full of hate, I was so angry, the scars run deep inside this tattooed body, there's things I'll take to my grave, but I'm okay, I'm okay, it's been a long hard road without you by my side, why weren't you there all the nights we cried, you broke my mother's heart, you broke your children for life, it's not okay, but we're alright, I remember the days you were a hero in my eyes, but those are just a long lost memory of mine, I spent so many years learning how to survive, and now I'm writing just to let you know I'm still alive, and sometimes I forgive, yeah and this time I'll admit, that I miss you, I said I miss you, it's been a long hard road without you by my side, why weren't you there all the nights we cried, you broke my mother's heart, you broke your children for life, it's not okay, but we're alright, I remember the days you were a hero in my eyes, but those are just a long lost memory of mine, I spent so many years learning how to survive, and now I'm writing just to let you know I'm still alive, and sometimes I forgive, yeah and this time I'll admit, that I miss you, I said I miss you...Hey dad, signed you son, Jake.'
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Toni's POV
The next few days were the roughest on the gang. Slowly we noticed that J.T. would never turn up at our house during the night, or that she would walk in the Curtis' house the middle of the day with bruises on her face but laughing glint in her eyes. Everyone acted as if they were waiting for her to just wonder in.
"I miss her," Johnny sighed, holding back tears.
"I know. It's like she'll just wonder back in here, like nothing's wrong," Two-Bit sighed.
"I hope her father rots in hell!" Dally exclaimed.
"I say we go to the nightly double tonight," Steve said.
"Steve! How can you think about movies when one of our gang just died?" Sodapop yelled. Everyone started arguing and I could hold it anymore.
"PEOPLE! SHUT UP! J.T ALWAYS HATED IT WHEN WE ARGUED! FOR ONCE THINK OF HOW SHE WOULD FEEL IF SHE WAS SITTING HERE!" I ran out and headed for the lot. I sat down and broke down crying. No one gave a shit about J.T, or at least they didn't act like it. Ten minutes later, Ponyboy came running over to the lot.
"We're sorry that we made you upset, Toni. But it's hard to think that we'll never see J.T. again. We're never gonna get to talk to her. We're never gonna find her sitting here, smoking and trying hard not to think about her father. It's hard for us to think that," Ponyboy stated.
"But what if she asked us for help? What if she never went home that night?" I cried.
"Toni. Don't beat yourself up over it. It wasn't your fault," Ponyboy said.
"But what if she never went home. She'd be sitting here, right now, talking to us, laughing, having a cigarette and we wouldn't be having this conversation," I sobbed.
"Everything happens for a reason," Ponyboy said, pulling me into a hug.
"J.T. didn't deserve to die. Neither did Dawson, or Pacey, or their mom or step-dad. But her father, the one that should be dead, is still alive getting food and housing for the rest of his life in jail!" I cried.
"Life never works fairly. The innocent sometimes get punished for things the other people should get punished for," Ponyboy told me.
"Life's never fair," I stated and I got up and walked away.
are you happy out there
in this great wide world,
do you think about your sons,
do you miss your little girl,
when you lay your head down,
how do you sleep at night,
do you even wonder
if we're alright,
if we're alright
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A/n: There is two more chapters left. I hope you like it!