Just One Big Happy Family

"I can't believe how fast you guys fixed this place after the fire," Pietro whistled. "Even a speedster like me is impressed." Pietro, Althea, Rogue, and Kitty were walking in the halls.

"Well it has been a week," Rogue told him.

"No word on Sinister huh?" Althea asked.

"Not a peep," Rogue shook her head.

"The Professor has been trying to track him down with Cerebro but nothing," Kitty said. "Like he doesn't even exist!"

"Or is very good at hiding mutant signatures," Rogue said.

"Why does that make me feel very nervous?" Althea grumbled.

"You should be," Pietro pointed out. "Especially since the guy has a teleportation machine of his own."

"It just keeps getting better and better doesn't it?" Althea rolled her eyes. "What more can happen to us?"

"Hey guys! X-Factor is on the news," Todd called out. "They just busted a drug smuggling ring."

"We haven't heard from them in a long time," Kitty remarked as they walked into the living room where all the other X-Men and Misfits were watching. On the television it showed the drug lords and their cargo being turned in by X-Factor.

"Valerie Cooper's been putting the team together and training them mostly," Althea explained. "One of the main goals of X-Factor is to improve mutant-human public relations. Guess she finally started the ball rolling with this mission."

"You mean PR for mutants huh?" Jubilee asked. "I don't believe it! How'd they get so lucky?"

"Hey any good press we can get I'll take!" Amara told her.

"Can't get much better press than taking down a drug ring," Bobby admitted.

"The X-Factor team is made up of Karma, a telepath…" Trish Trilby showed their pictures on television.

"Notice the fact that she also possesses minds is omitted," Pietro said.

"Telek, a telekinetic," Trish went on. "Strong Guy, a mutant who absorbs kinetic energy and turns it into superhuman strength."

"Whoa," Tabitha looked at the large mutant with white hair and black glasses. "Wouldn't want to run into him in a dark alley."

"Medic, a healer with a photographic memory…" A shot of a very handsome young man in a red and white uniform was shown.

"This guy could give George Clooney a run for his money," Jubilee said.

"American Eagle, superhuman agility, enhanced senses and an expert marksman," Trish went on. The picture was a young Native American wearing a red and blue uniform and having a gold bow and arrows.

"I wonder if Captain America will sue him for copyright infringement?" Logan thought aloud.

"Willow, who is able to control plants…" Trish said. A picture of Willow appeared. She was wearing a low cut black spandex top, a black spandex mini skirt and thigh high black boots.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SLUT DOING ON TV?" Jean shouted.

"And of course we all know Alison Blaire, AKA the Dazzler," Trish rounded up.

"Alison…" Hank's face fell.

"FORGET ALISION!" Jean snapped. "What is Willow of all people doing on X-Factor?"

"Yeah last I checked she was an Eloi," Sam said.

"And she still doesn't wear enough clothes," Jean fumed.

Betsy and the other new additions to the X-Men blinked. "Friend of yours?" Betsy asked.

"Not exactly," Pietro cackled.

"Let's just say she created quite a stir last time we met," Scott groaned.

"Why do I have a feeling you Misfits know something about this?" Kitty glared at them.

"Well uh…" Lance gulped.

"The Joes kind of secretly introduced Valerie Cooper to the Eloi a while back," Althea admitted. "She wanted to see a mutant community. The Misfits weren't involved or invited to go."

"Isn't that a shock?" Rogue said sarcastically. "What happened?"

"Cooper wanted to recruit a few more mutants and at the time nobody thought any of them would join," Lance explained. "But Willow wanted to see the world and…"

"And how would you know this?" Kitty glared at him.

"We…exchange e-mails," Lance winced. "Kitty we're just friends."

"Oh yeah! Right!" Kitty snorted folding her arms. Lance tried to touch her but she brushed him off. "Don't touch me!" She stormed away.

"Kitty…" Lance whined and followed her.

"Hey! You're not exactly one to complain!" Todd shouted after her. "Man she is so uptight!"

"Talk about double standards," Fred agreed.

Paige gave them a look and then looked at her brother. "Am I missing something?"

"Uh yeah," Sam sighed. "You see Lance and Willow kind of hooked up during one of the times he and Kitty broke up."

"They were going at it like rabbits," Pietro snickered. "But it was just a brief fling."

"One of many in Willow's life," Jean grumbled.

"One day we decided it would be kind of fun to introduce Willow to the X-Men," Todd went on. "And it was!"

"Yeah for you!" Rogue snapped. "And all the guys drooling all over her."

"Including Scott," Amara told them. "And Peter."

"The claws really came out that day," Fred chuckled.

"Oh," Everett nodded. "I get it now."

"That does explain a few things," Betsy nodded.

"You should have seen the fight those two had on the lawn," Pietro indicated Jean with his thumb. "It was priceless!"

"It was not priceless," Xavier sighed. "It cost over four hundred and fifty eight dollars to reseed the lawn."

"I can't believe the media are going nuts over these guys," Jubilee said. "Look at the press eating it up."

"Are you really that surprised?" Todd pointed. "Look at 'em. They look like the Stepford Mutants."

"I fear Toad has a point," Hank nodded. "These mutants were obviously selected for a more positive reaction to mutations."

"In other words mutants that look good on camera," Fred grumbled.

"Family friendly mutants with powers not too bizarre so that they don't scare the public," Pietro mocked.

"Yeah well that outfit Willow's wearing is definitely not PG-13!" Jean folded her arms.

"Who cares? She looks hot," Tim hooted.

"At least we all know why she was recruited," Rogue grunted.

"Hey half the country agrees with me," Tim told her.

"The male half," Amara glared at him.

"I think she might get a few female fans," Betsy said.

"Hey it could be a lot worse," Logan pointed out. "Anything positive is a good thing. Only wish we could get some of that."

"This does give me an idea…" Xavier thought.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Three days later…

"Kurt are you wearing lip gloss?" Rogue asked.

"It's lip balm that happens to be a bit shiny," He told her. "I want to look good for the camera."

"Not one word Pietro!" Rogue whipped around and glared at her other half brother.

"Don't accuse me!" Pietro defended. "I'm the one who gave it to him."

"Fred Dukes stop eating the cookies!" Betsy snapped. "They're for company!"

"Well what do you think I am?" Fred snapped back as Betsy took the plate from him.

"Ooh! Ooh! Can I answer this one?" Ray held up his hand.

"Althea! Toad! Stop making out with each other!" Peter snapped.

"Just because you're striking out in the love department…" Todd grumbled.

"Professor why the hell did you invite the Misfits here?" Rogue shouted. "This is supposed to be our interview?"

"The Misfits are here to show the public a more diverse view of mutants," Xavier told her.

"Well you can't get any more diverse than this group," Scott groaned.

"They need to see that the X-Men are willing to get along with mutants that work within the government," Xavier continued. "That the X-Men are a legitimate team of mutants willing to help people."

"Instead of the vigilantes the public thinks we," Scott added.

"Technically you guys are vigilantes," Lance pointed out.

"And technically you Misfits are thugs and lunatics," Scott snapped.

"Reformed thugs," Fred folded his arms.

"I prefer the term sanity impaired," Arcade added. Soon several X-Men and Misfits started to argue amongst themselves. Soon it seemed like some powers were very close to being activated due to the heat of the argument.

"ALL RIGHT! LISTEN UP!" Jean shouted. Everyone stopped what he or she was doing immediately. "There is going to be a reporter and a news crew on our doorstep at any minute to interview us! I don't think I need to stress enough how much we need some good publicity right now! So for just one afternoon you are all going to pretend that you are normal people and not behave like the freaks you are! Got it?"

"Oh there's an inspiring pep talk," Pietro snickered. "HEY!" He was dragged telekinetically toward Jean.

"I am warning you Pietro Maximoff," Jean growled in his face. "Don't push me! Not today! You and the rest of your idiot squad are going to behave like mature human beings. I know it's a stretch but if you will try it for a few hours or else I will personally give you nightmares for the rest of your lives! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?"

"Jean, Jean calm down!" Scott put his hand on her shoulder.

"Sorry, sorry…" Jean let Pietro go. "I'm just a little nervous here."

"I know you are but you just need to relax a little, okay?" Scott asked.

"Yeah Jean you gotta keep it together," Pietro smoothed his hair. "I mean control yourself. We have an image to maintain. The last thing we need is for you to wig out on camera giving mutants a bad name."

"HOW ABOUT I GIVE YOU A BROKEN NECK?" Jean grabbed his neck and started to throttle him. "HOW ABOUT THAT FUNNY GUY? HUH? HUH?"

"JEAN NO!" Scott tried to pull her off Pietro.

"AAKKKK!" Pietro sputtered.

"WHAT'S THE MATTER?" Jean screamed. "WHERE'S ALL YOUR SMART ALECK REMARKS NOW? WHERE ARE THEY?"

"I need help here!" Scott called out. It took Scott, Lance, Peter and Logan to drag her off Pietro. Meanwhile Wanda, Althea, Tabitha and Rogue were laughing their heads off. "For God's sake Jean! Knock it off!"

"YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY?" Jean snapped at the girls while the guys restrained her. "YOU WANNA PIECE OF ME?"

"JEAN!" Scott shouted.

Finally Jean calmed down. "Okay, okay…I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I kind of flew off the handle there…"

"Kind of?" Pietro snapped. "You went freaking mental on us!"

"I've been stressed okay?" Jean snapped. "Give me a break! I have had a very bad week!"

"Would you like some of my medication?" Arcade offered her some. "The purple ones make you feel really happy."

"If she doesn't want any I'll take one…" Hank grumbled.

"Jean…" Xavier was surprised. "Are you really going to be all right?"

"Yeah this so not like you," Kitty said. "Rogue I can see going mental but you…"

"What do you mean me?" Rogue glared at her. "I'm not the one with serious relationship problems!"

"No you just have problems period!" Kitty snapped back.

"Why you…" Rogue made a fist.

"Knock it off!" Logan barked an order. "No killing each other and that's final!"

"And you wonder why I'm stressed?" Jean looked at Xavier.

"I see your point," Xavier sighed. The doorbell rang. "All right now everyone be on your best behavior!"

"That reminds me," Logan thought aloud. "Did anybody take care of Penny?"

"What do you mean?" Tabitha asked.

"He means did someone put her special gloves on and put her in her room so that we wouldn't have a repeat of the Glory incident?" Warren asked.

"Weren't you supposed to do it?" Hank looked at him.

"No, I had some business on the phone to attend to," Warren said. "I had to have an important phone conference. "I thought Ororo was going to do it."

"Me? I was busy getting everything ready for the interview," Ororo said. "Logan was supposed to do it."

"I had deactivate half of the security systems and modify 'em so the reporters wouldn't get blasted before they walked through the door!" Logan snapped. "Hank?"

"No one told me anything!" Hank snapped. "Why do I always have to…"

NOT NOW! Xavier sent a quick telepathic message to them as he showed in Trish Trilby and her cameramen. "And you are familiar with some of my students, Ms. Tilby?"

"Yes I remember we did an interview with some of them a while back," Trish nodded.

"Yeah and you got in a real big cat fight with Dazzler!" Jamie said loudly. "That was cool!"

"Have a cookie, Jamie," Betsy smiled sweetly and shoved a cookie into Jamie's mouth.

"How come he gets a cookie?" Fred asked.

"Here! Have the whole bloody tray!" Betsy hissed as she shoved it at him. She quickly recovered. "It's an English delicacy. Bloody Trays. Wonderful cookies. They're called that because of the raspberry filling inside."

"All right let's set up in the living room here," Trish told her cameramen. "This will be taped so just relax."

"I'll relax when this nightmare is over," Scott whispered to Kurt.

Soon all the X-Men and Misfits were settled in the room. The cameramen started to film. "This is Trish Trilby with an exclusive interview with both the X-Men and the Misfits, the famous mutant teams. Professor Charles Xavier is the leader of the X-Men and Marvin 'Roadblock' Hinton the head of the Misfit Team."

"He is?" Sam asked.

"Yeah he's the head adult," Todd replied. "What? Did you really think Hawk would put Shipwreck in charge?"

"Where is your father?" Ororo looked around nervously.

"Oh my father couldn't be here," Althea said sweetly. "He came down with a rather bad case of the flu. He got it tending to my baby brothers."

"He's such a devoted parent," Roadblock grinned. "We practically had to tie him to the bed to make sure he got some rest."

"It's interesting," Trish said. "Your two groups are very different in many ways. Does this contribute to the rivalry you have?"

"I wouldn't say we have a rivalry of any kind," Jean lied through her teeth. "We can be a bit competitive at times sure but there's no hard feelings between us."

"Yeah when one of us loses to the other we just grin and bear it," Peter said slightly sarcastically. "Knowing the better man won."

"And it's so gracious of the loser to admit the truth," Lance replied slightly maliciously.

"What the students are trying to say is that we are very close to each other," Ororo intervened.

"A little too close at times if you ask me," Logan grumbled.

"Oh sure we get on each other's nerves every once in a while," Hank piped up. "But that's because our two groups have bonded like a family. A large extended family."

"A very large weird extended family," Jubilee said.

"Ever see the Munsters?" Arcade asked.

Just then Lockheed flew through the room and nearly knocked over Trish. "Was that a dragon?" Trish asked.

"Uh…" Jean gulped. "Well…"

Making loud barking sounds Penny bounded in chasing Lockheed. She nearly knocked Trish and the others over as well. "What was that?" Trish yelled.

"Oh Penny…" Ororo groaned.

"Is one of our special needs students," Jean said quickly. "She was abandoned and that affected her. She's much more outgoing than she was when she first got here. Could someone please…?"

"I'll go!" Both Logan and Warren said quickly and ran after her.

"It's certainly lively around here," Trish blinked. "Now let's get back to your two teams. Both of you, mainly the X-Men have been at the center of a lot of controversy."

"Well people do tend to discuss and debate anything that is new and different," Hank spoke.

"Different is one word for it," Scott breathed.

"Well the Institute has had several ups and downs in its five years of operation," Trish spoke.

"Only five years?" Kurt asked. "Seems longer to me. OW!"

Rogue pretended she didn't elbow him. "Time just seems to fly when you're learning new things."

"But you must admit that between your two groups there have been a lot of problems," Trish pressed. "Your homes have been attacked, there have been several lawsuits and death threats against you and your families. How do you account for all of this?"

"I think we're cursed," Todd piped up.

"We are not cursed," Jean gave him a look.

"Well if we're not, we're pretty close to it," Kitty grumbled.

"What the kids are trying to say is that it's not easy being a mutant," Roadblock jumped in. "The pressure of bigotry and hatred could get to anyone. And most of them are just kids. But the goal of our two groups is to teach tolerance and how to use their gifts for the greater good. And that common bond unites us."

"I know it may seem a bit, hectic around here," Scott said. "But what school doesn't have its little ups and downs? Yes we all come from different backgrounds. But can you really say that every child has had a perfect home life? I mean some of these kids have come from really bad situations."

"Here these students have a home," Xavier spoke. "A place where they can learn to use their powers to help mankind. True we may have one or two…individuals who have trouble fitting into 'normal' society. But the Institute is a place where they can fit in and be accepted for who they are."

"So we all have our little quirks? All in all, life at the Xavier Institute is pretty much like any other normal school," Jean smiled.

It was just then a dimensional portal opened and S'ym stepped through carrying some luggage. "I can't take living with your sister anymore!" He shouted at Peter. "I'm moving in!"

"S'ym! S'ym!" Illyana stormed through the portal waving her sword and wearing a suit of armor. "You come back here you demon lackey!"

"Oh god we're screwed!" Jean closed her eyes tightly in an effort to make it all go away.

"I'm not your lackey! Not anymore!" S'ym shouted back at her.

"You are my lackey until the day I decide to hack you to pieces and serve your roasted meat on my dinner table!" Illyana shouted.

"That's the trouble with you! You don't respect my feelings!" S'ym shouted.

"Since when do you have any feelings at all?" Illyana shouted. She brought her sword down and hacked apart a coffee table in one fell swoop.

Trish's jaw was literally open wide. The cameras were rolling. Pietro looked at Jean. "And you were worried about us acting up?"

"Yeah what was that about us acting like mature human beings?" Fred mocked.

"It's official," Jean winced as Peter and Logan tried to stop Illyana from hacking S'ym and the room to pieces. "We are cursed."