Here we are again... New year and a brand spanking new chapter. Enjoy! (and don't forget to review!)

Creed

Chapter 15

Faith was fired up tonight, and the helpless vampire never had a chance. She pounded him without mercy, laying her blows with all her anger, pain and misery. Her vision clouded and she gritted her teeth to prevent her eyes from watering. The threat of tears only fuelled her fire, and she reached for the stake in her waistband. She would not cry. She never cried. As she slammed her fist into the vampire's face angrily, Faith's eyes hardened and once again became blank voids. The vampire shivered when he looked into them before he passed out from the pain, and seconds later she staked him. She was left standing alone in the cemetery, panting from the exertion. The dust settled at her feet and she madly searched for others she could vent her rage on. Slaying was her therapy, and at the moment she needed a lot of it.

She had felt it. She was so damned sure she had felt it that day, almost two weeks ago now. It wasn't leftovers, or whatever Giles thought it was. It was her. Buffy. The Slayer. She had been coming back, and then they took it all away from her again. As much as she wanted to blame it on Giles and the Scoobies, she knew she couldn't. Her time in jail had made her grow up more than she'd realized. She truly understood what they were trying to do. She'd do it too, if it meant Buffy would be happy. But Faith knew it wouldn't, and nothing she could say would make them see it otherwise.

It hadn't been her argument with Giles and the others that had hurt, though. It had been Buffy's refusal to meet her eyes when she told Faith to go. She had given up, and God it hurt. It hurt because the woman she loved didn't want her around. Faith loved a woman who hated her.

Her foot slammed into a gravestone, and the stone crumbled to pieces.

Hearing a slight rustle behind her, Faith clenched her stake tightly and then slipped it into her jacket. The demon didn't get within four feet from her when she kicked up a slab of stone, caught it in her hand and hurled it behind her. It snapped the demon's head back with a sickening crunch, and before it could recover Faith was upon it, whaling her fists on its thick hide. The demon's skin split and bruised beneath her blows, but all she could see was the defeated emptiness in Buffy's eyes.

She didn't notice the demon was limp and unmoving beneath her until she stepped back to flex her cut knuckles. A surge of self-disgust and helplessness overcame her, and as her throat constricted she pulled out her knife and quickly sliced it across the demon's throat, putting it out of its painful misery. Faith dragged the demon corpse into a musty mausoleum, and when she was back outside with the heavy door slamming shut behind her Faith felt a pang of loneliness.

The night was silent. Heavy clouds blocked out the moon and the stars, and a sharp wind whipped her clothes against her skin. It felt as though the cemetery wasn't a part of her world, and neither was she.

She needed to get out of the cemetery. She quickly made her way to the fence, and it wasn't until she had vaulted over it that the suffocating sensation left her. When she rounded the corner the world came rushing back, as Los Angeles' nightlife assaulted her in a fusion of neon lights, thumping music, and the blare of horns, shrieks and dogs barking.

Faith needed a drink.

It had been nearly two weeks since Buffy had told her to leave, and the memories still hurt like hell. She had headed straight for the Summers' house, packed her things and hightailed it out of there before Buffy got home. She had hesitated when she came to actually leaving Buffy's room. It had been the closest thing she'd had to an actual home in years, and again she had been forced out. After a few bus trips and with the last of her dollars spent on a motel that reminded her of the dump she had stayed in during her first few months in Sunnydale, Faith found herself alone, bored and desperately wishing she could at least call Buffy and hear her voice.

Making her way to a dilapidated demon bar on the outskirts of town, Faith couldn't wait to feel the burn of vodka down her throat. She slipped past the hefty, spiky-skinned bouncer who let her pass with a quick step back and headed straight for the bar. She shoved her way through the crowd and ordered a vodka shot. Three shots later she was beginning to feel a little better but she was far from drunk.

"So when did getting drunk become the in-thing to do?" Spike asked, sliding into the seat next to her. "'Cause I wish someone had told me about it years ago so I wouldn't be drinking by myself."

"You're a century old, grandpa," she replied. "You've never been in the loop."

He smirked and motioned for a drink. The bartender handed it to him and he finished it in one gulp.

Faith threw her head back and downed another drink, then turned to the vampire beside her. "So what're you doing in these parts?"

"A little birdy told me you were dryin' up his business," he answered.

Faith smirked. "How's the big guy doing?"

"You know Angel." Spike shrugged. "Cries over his bad luck, finds demon, kills demon, and cries some more."

"And he actually heard your voice without dropping his life to play Prince Charming and rescue his love?"

"Nah, he didn't speak to me." He grinned. "What was he going to do anyway, luv? Run down to Sunnyhell and glare me to death with his puppy eyes? No. Giles called him to find out if you were here and I was listening on the other phone."

Faith snorted. "And here I was thinking you were the new and improved Spike."

He smirked. "What can I say, pet? I've been bad for too long."

Her lips twitched at his words. "So… Why was the Watcher calling Angel anyway?"

Spike tried to chose his words carefully, but he'd never been one for tact or subtleness. "He was checking up on you, luv."

"Why the hell would he? He kicks me out of town and then decides to play daddy again?"

"Right then. I'm gonna give you a little look into the minds of these buggering idiots. They say one thing and mean another. They do things they don't really want to do, and never do the things they do want to. They get high on trying to make things better and never sit back and say 'shit happens, so I'm just gonna live with it'. They want their lives to be so soddin' perfect that they don't see the good things right in front of 'em."

Faith stared at him, wondering who had killed the annoying vampire she knew and placed an insightful psychologist into his body.

He threw up his hands in disgust. "Pet, do you need me to hold up a sign explaining it to you? The Watcher didn't want you gone; he just wanted Buffy to be able to move on. Buffy doesn't want you gone; but that bint's so lost she wouldn't know what she wants. The others… Well, what do you expect? It's Willow and Xander and we're not talking miracles here." He took a breath. "But the important thing here is Buffy didn't want you to leave."

Faith raised an eyebrow. "Then why did she let me?"

Spike opened his mouth, but for once, words failed him and he had nothing to say. They both nodded when the bartender dropped two beers in front of them. Silence fell as they gulped the drinks, making both of them uncomfortable.

"So why're you here?"

"I don't usually do this, buggering in people's lives," he said, throwing his hands out for emphasis. "But Giles sent me here 'cause Buffy needs you. The way she's acting these days she may as well be six feet under." He seemed to slump forward. "You two are twisted."

"Us two?" Faith asked, already knowing the answer.

"You and the Slayer. I mean… Buffy." He shook his head. "She ain't the same, is she?"

Faith snorted, but said nothing.

"I loved her, you know," he said suddenly. She glanced at him in surprise, but he plundered on before she could say anything. "They told me I didn't, that I couldn't. But she believed in me."

"She's like that," Faith murmured.

Spike nodded. "She thought I was a man. She saw me as a man, and for that, I'll always love her. But she doesn't love me."

Faith lifted the glass to her lips and swallowed quickly. "Seems to be a common thing round here. Love the Slayer and get shut down."

"'M not blind, Faith. I see it."

Faith raised her eyebrows. "Yeah? I'm not trying to hide it."

"Guess we're playing against each other, huh?" He played with the empty glass. "Who would've thought a guy like meand a Slayer would be chasing the same bint? Seems we're always on different sides."

"Well there's not much competition from this side." Faith muttered. "She wanted me gone and that's what I'm doing. Couldn't stand being back in Sunnyhell anyway."

"Gonna just give up? Mate, I heard stories about you, and none of them said you were this gutless."

Faith lifted her head and stared at Spike, and he shivered from the stark emptiness in them. "Then you haven't heard the one where Buffy slid a knife into my gut." Her chair scraped as she pushed away from the counter. She dug her hands in her pockets and they came out empty. She dropped her eyes for the briefest of moments, but it was enough for Spike to see the misery in her face. He pulled out a ten dollar note and dropped it onto the counter.

She turned to walk away, but Spike was suddenly seized by the memory of Buffy's face as she sat on her bed. He leapt off the stool and followed her out the door.

"Faith," he called out, but she was already gone.

The next night Faith entered the cemetery with fresh vigour and a need to kill. The cool air kissed her skin, and as she carefully watched the graves and peered at the stars above her she heard the dull echoing thump of music wafting from a nearby club.She strode confidently in between the fresh graves, determined not to think of Buffy or anything else, but just to enjoy the freedom she had while waiting for the tell-tale shift of soil. It came only a minute later, and a hand popped out from the mound of dirt. She gripped it and hauled the newly risen vampire to his feet.

"Welcome back," she said.

He frowned, cocking his head slightly. "Huh?"

His eyes widened in surprise as he glanced down and saw the stake protruding from his heart. His mouth formed a small 'o' and he exploded into dust, leaving Faith twirling the stake in her fingers. "Or not."

She walked through the remains of the vampire settling back on the empty grave and inhaled the aroma of roasting turkey that wafted from a restaurant a street away. What she wouldn't give for a proper meal, a meal like the ones Joyce used to cook for her. But Joyce was dead, and Faith frowned in wistful memory. The older woman had been everything she had ever wanted; a caring, loving mother who actually gave a damn about her daughter. The only problem had been that Faith wasn't her daughter- Buffy was. It had been that fact that had pushed her to threaten Joyce and the kid. Faith hastily pushed the memory aside while silently apologising to Joyce, who she had affectionately named "Mrs. S".

She wondered what Joyce thought of her now. If Joyce was even watching over her, that is. With a sudden pang of determination, Faith decided she wanted to be back in Sunnydale. She had always been known as a headstrong, impulsive and stubborn girl, but usually that referred to her slaying and waywardness. And since when had Faith ever cared what others thought of her? The only people whose opinion mattered were the people she loved.

And Faith loved Buffy.

Something clicked inside her. The first time she had been in Sunnydale she'd been wild and out of control. The next time after she'd woken up she'd been completely confused, terrified and alone. And when Buffy had brought her back from L.A she'd been desperate to stay out of jail and determined to become the good young woman she thought the others wanted her to be. This time, she'd go back as herself. She'd go back and tell it like it was, open their eyes to who she was and make them accept her. She refused to settle for less.

With a blaze of resolve Faith headed for the main street with only one thing on her mind: she was going to get her girl back.

To Be Continued…