Disclaimer: Power Rangers isn't mine. Surprised?

Ashley Hammond/Astro Yellow: He forgot because he's an idiot? Either that or he was afraid to push her for anything. Take your pick. :P

Jenny: It's not the trial just yet. Andros has to be an idiot first. :P Ashley named Tawny Tawny because... because I chose Tawny's name before I did Terry's and by the time I realized that the names were sorta similar, I was already writing chapter 5 and I was too lazy to change it?

C.C.C: No trial for a few more chapters, sorry. I'm busy stalling. But on the plus side, I'll update a.s.a.p. :P

Chapter 22

"Ashley?" Andros spoke softly, not wanting to disturb her if she'd fallen asleep. He needn't have worried; Ashley wasn't going to be doing any sleeping this night. Her head tilted back and he found himself staring at her face upside down.

"What?" Her voice was snappish and irritable, neither of which he could blame her for. A moment later, Ashley added, in a much softer tone, "Sorry."

"It's all right." Andros slipped his arms around her as she sat up, resting his head against hers. "How are you doing?"

"I've been better," Ashley answered dryly. "But I imagine that there are more relaxing things to do than testifying against your rapist in court."

"Ash, you know we're all here for you," Andros murmured softly as he felt her trembling slightly.

"I know," Ashley whispered. "Thanks."

"He can't hurt you anymore, Ash," Andros assured her. Completely encased in his arms, Ashley almost believed him.

"But what if they let him go?" Ashley whispered, her nails digging into his arms. "They'll wonder why I never said anything. They'll wonder why I never fought him. He'll get off, and then he'll still own me."

"No one owns you, Ashley," Andros said firmly. "No one."

"Then why won't he go away?" Ashley wailed. "I still hear him laughing at me. Telling me that I was worthless and that no one would ever want me now. I still see him standing over me, and I'm too afraid to fight him. I still feel him..."

She choked on her words, twisting away before Andros could see the terror triggered by the memories. It was too much to live with; Ashley wished that she could just curl up and die, before she had to relive it yet again, this time in front of so many people.

"Andros?"

The Karovan man at her side took her hands in his before giving her a questioning look, waiting patiently until she was ready to speak. It took several minutes for Ashley to work up the nerve to make an admission more painful than any other she had made during this entire ordeal.

"I'm scared."

Silently, Andros gathered her into his arms, holding her close. "I know you are," he whispered. "It's only a little longer, Ash. Just be strong for a few more weeks. Then it's over."

"I can't," Ashley cried, shaking. "That's too much."

"You can," Andros told her, entwining his fingers with her cold ones. "You've been so strong so far. After Tawny was born, you went back and lived in that house with him for two years. I know you're scared, Ash, but you don't realize how strong you really are."

"Maybe you don't realize how weak I really am," Ashley mumbled. Andros stared at the girl he loved more than life, his heart breaking for her. Suddenly, she seemed small in his arms, frail somehow. Not knowing what else to, he tightened his embrace, and continued telling her that she was strong enough for this, hoping in vain that even one word would sink into her mind.

"I love you, Ashley," he whispered, squeezing her fingers, trying to warm her hands between his own.

"I love you too, Andros," Ashley murmured, struggling out of his arms, twisting around to face him. "But..."

"But what?" Andros felt a small knot forming in the pit of his stomach, ballooning to the size of a boulder in seconds as Ashley's silence grew. Her eyes had taken on the same sad look he had seen the day that she had broken up with him. Andros prayed that she wouldn't do it again. "Ash, just tell me!"

"Andros, I don't know how long of a trial it will be," Ashley said, staring at her hands, her eyes flickering up to meet his periodically. "And as long as I'm supposed to spend every day talking about what Terry did, I don't think that we... I don't think that I can..."

"It's all right," Andros assured her, too relieved by the fact that she wasn't leaving him to be extraordinarily upset over anything else that she could say. "I'll leave you alone if that's what you want."

"But that's not what I want," Ashley said with a shake of her head. "I just... I don't know!"

"It's all right," Andros said, gently rubbing her shoulders as she allowed him to wrap his arms around her again. "I'll do anything to make this easier for you."

"Then don't go," Ashley whispered. "Andros, please don't leave."

"Who said I was going anywhere?" Andros demanded, stroking her hair gently with one hand. "I love you, and I'm never leaving you, Ashley."

Ashley's tear-filled brown eyes didn't quite meet his hazel ones, and she buried her face in his neck, mumbling, "Don't make promises you can't keep."

"I'm never leaving you, Ashley," Andros repeated quietly, raising her chin to make her meet his eyes. "I promise you."

"Andros, please stop," Ashley cried, tearing her eyes away from his. "You don't know what you're doing to me."

"I'm sorry," Andros apologized softly, brushing stray tears out of Ashley's watery eyes. "I'm not trying to hurt you."

"Then what are you trying to do?" Ashley demanded, struggling out of his warm embrace. Andros made to catch her arms, and caught himself just in time, knowing what that would do to her.

"I'm trying to tell you that I love you more than anyone else in the world," Andros said softly, his throat suddenly very dry. "I'm trying to tell you that I... I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

For a moment, Ashley stared at him mutely, recovering her voice just as Andros added quickly, "I know what you said before, and I'm not trying to push you into anything, but after the trial, after this is over... would you marry me?"

"You'd marry someone who was raped?" Ashley whispered, her mind overflowing with the reasons that he shouldn't want her. "You'd marry someone with a child that wasn't yours? You'd marry someone who couldn't give you children of your own?"

"Yes," Andros said softly. "If that someone was you."

Tears were falling freely down Ashley's face now, and she slowly started shaking her head. "Why?"

"Because I love you," Andros said simply. He raised one hand to her face, gently wiping away her tears. Ashley let him pull her into his arms and he stroked her hair until her crying had turned into an occasional sniffle.

"I love you," Ashley whispered, swallowing a fresh wave of tears that threatened to overwhelm her. She wondered why it hurt so much more to be loved than to be hated. "You're sure you'd want me?"

"I'm positive," Andros said. He turned his head until he was able to look directly into her eyes. "I'm always going to want you, as long as you'll want me."

"Why wouldn't I want you?" Ashley buried her face in Andros's chest, inhaling the familiar, comforting scent of him as he kissed the top of her head.

"I can think of more reasons why you shouldn't want me than why I shouldn't want you," Andros told her softly. "You don't have to answer me now, Ashley. I just... I just wanted you to know..."

"No, you didn't," Ashley said, looking up into his hazel eyes, where she could see his raw pain clearly. "You wanted me to say yes."

"But you didn't," Andros said sadly, crushed. He glanced away quickly; if he stared into her eyes any longer, he knew he was going to break down and cry. "And you don't have to."

"I want to," Ashley murmured, and Andros breathed a little easier.

"Y-you do?"

"Andros..." Ashley let her voice trail off, trying to form a reply that would neither break his heart nor promise away something she wasn't ready to give. "If I say no, I'll regret it for the rest of my life... but if I say yes, then I... I'd be trapped, and I'd never be able to say no to you ever again."

Andros shifted, and Ashley held onto him, her head resting against his shoulder. She could feel him shaking just the slightest bit, and knew that he was struggling very hard to keep her from seeing how deeply she'd just hurt him.

"I understand," he said stiffly, biting down on his inner lip, blinking hard.

"Would you... ask me again?" Ashley asked softly. "When this is over?"

"Of course I will," Andros told her. "If that's what you want, Ash."

"It is," Ashley whispered. She rested her head on his chest, wishing that she could deserve him and his love. "I know I'm asking a lot from you, but I..."

"No, Ashley," Andros said gently. "I'm the one who's asking too much of you. I shouldn't be proposing to you right now, but I am. Maybe it's because I'm selfish, or maybe I'm just being stupid, but I..."

He shrugged at her, lost, and Ashley sighed. "I love you, Andros, I really do," she whispered as Andros tucked her head under his chin. "I can't think of a better way to spend my life than with you. I just can't move on until after Terry's gone... if he's ever gone."

"No matter what happens," Andros said, "he's never going to touch you again, Ash. I promise you that, no matter what I have to do to keep it."

There was a hidden undertone of violence in his voice, and Ashley shuddered. "Andros, you wouldn't... if he gets off, you wouldn't kill him, would you?"

"Would you want me to?"

"No," Ashley murmured. "I want him to die a horrible death half the time, but if he ever did, I wouldn't want you to do it. I wouldn't want you to be a murderer for me. I'm not worth that."

"I don't think I've got it in me to kill anyone," Andros admitted a moment later. "No matter how much of a monster they were." He stopped just short of telling her that for her, he'd find it in himself to kill, and pressed a warm kiss her temple as Ashley stifled a yawn. "You should sleep, Ash," he told her quietly. "Do you want me to go?"

"No," Ashley said, not saying any more for fear that she would start whimpering or pleading. She knew Andros would stay with her if she begged him to, but she didn't want him there out of pity.

"Then I'll stay," Andros said, loosening his hold on her to let her settle herself onto the bed. Ashley lay down and curled up immediately, trying to hold herself together. Andros wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close, her back resting against his chest. "Don't worry, Ash," he added softly, feeling her breathing beginning to deepen. "I'm never going to let you go."