Salutations, fans! Well, I have good news totally unrelated to car insurance: I've decided on Bee's song. You'll have to wait until chapter 9 to see what it is, but I have decided on it. Moving on, I'll attend to the reviews and disclaimer, then move right into the action:
imfromjupiter: Thank you for pressing the button. The money has been placed in your account. ;) Also, no pie for late guesses.
Tealfrog26: I won't ask why, I'll just do this: ¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿¡¿ Thanks for the review!
Wind Lane: Thanks for trying, but I came up with a better idea. Still, I appreciate the effort.
Aragorn501: WOO! HERE IT IS!
realfanficts: Surprisingly, my penmanship is not why my hordes follow me. I give a great dental/medical plan, not to mention two months paid vacation per year. When your hordes are infinite, you can do that kind of thing.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Teen Titans, "Weird Al" Yankovic, any of the latter's songs, Oprah Winfrey, or any of her vast holdings, including all yachts, diamonds, and the sovereign nation of Ugogirl. Song lyrics courtesy of alsongs . com
EVENWORSETRACKFIVEEVENWORSETRACKFIVEEVENWORSETRACKFIVEEVENWORSETRACKFIVE
"Ahem." The author drew the attention of the just-warped Titans East. "Hi. My name is Overactive Mind. The Titans West can fill you in on what's going on. After that, you'll be singing, starting with Speedy and Robin."
"WHAT?"
"BUT I ALREADY SANG!"
"So? This song will only work if you both sing, and you can't stop me even if you refuse."
"Why not?" demanded Speedy, but he was quickly informed of the writer's powers over the Titans' reality, along with the rest of the Titans East.
"Pssh, no MAN can tell me what to do." boasted Bumblebee.
"Oh really?" Overactive Mind arched a skeptical eyebrow, then quickly typed something new. Bumblebee suddenly found herself stretching her arms out as her mouth involuntarily formed the words "Starfire, give me a hug!"
"Oh, but of course, friend Bumblebee! I am always willing to hug my dearest friends!" With that, Starfire gave the the sassy superheroine an embrace the likes of which had been outlawed by the Geneva Convention. Bumblebee's eyes widened both in shock and because they were being forced from their sockets by the Tamaranean's affectionate crushing.
"So," said Overactive, returning his gaze to the masked duo," you guys gonna do this willingly, or will I have to make you?"
The archer sighed. "Fine. We'll do it."
The author beamed. "Excellent!" He quickly switched to emcee mode: "Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the masked former sidekick that knows karate and throws things, and the masked former sidekick who knows karate and shoots things, Robin and Speedy! They'll be performing 'I Think I'm A Clone Now."
Once more, the stage shifted. As the other Titans went backstage (Cyborg had to carry Bee, who was now notably thinner than usual,) the entire performance area became completely symmetrical, as the two nearly identical heroes recieved their microphones. They sang side by side, simultaneously as the music began:
Isn't it strange...? Feels like I'm lookin' in the mirror
What would people say...if only they knew that I was
Part of some geneticist's plan
Born to be a carbon copy man
There in a petri dish late one night
They took a donor's body cell and fertilized a human egg and so I say...
I think I'm a clone now
There's always two of me just a-hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now
'Cause every chromosome is a hand-me-down
Look at the way...we go out walking close together
I guess you could say...I'm really beside myself
I still remember how it began
They produced a carbon copy man
Born in a science lab late one night
Without a mother or a father
Just a test tube and a womb with a view...
I think I'm a clone now
There's always two of me just a-hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now
'Cause every chromosome is a hand-me-down
I think I'm a clone now
And I can stay at home while I'm out of town
I think I'm a clone now
'Cause every pair of genes is a hand-me-down
Signing autographs for my fans
Come and meet the carbon copy man
Livin' in stereo, it's all right
Well I can be my own best friend and I can send myself for pizza, so I say...
I think I'm a clone now
Another one of me's always hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now
'Cause every chromosome is a hand-me-down
I think I'm a clone now
I've been on Oprah Winfrey, I'm world renowned
I think I'm a clone now
And every pair of genes is a hand-me-down
I think I'm a clone now
Thats my genetic twin always hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now
'Cause every chromosome is a hand-me-down
Cheering rang out from the audience, who had suddenly doubled in size. Apparently, the population of Steel City had been plopped into a new seating area during the number. Even the numerous adversaries of the Titans East had appeared, at the same altitude as the western villains. Robin's fangirls had returned with a vengeance, and Speedy's fans waved bows of all sizes and materials.
After a rather violent yet nonlethal strafing run by a certain Tamaranean, the crowd quieted down enough for the next announcement from Overactive Mind. "I can't think of many things that could top that last performance, but here's one of them! Performing next, its..."
ENDCHAPTERSEVENENDCHAPTERSEVENENDCHAPTERSEVENENDCHAPTERSEVENENDCHAPTERSEVEN
I thought that song seemed appropriate of those two. Robin lovers rejoice, for your hero got an encore! For those who are wondering, the song's tune is that of "I Think We're Alone Now." Next up is another duo performance, whoever guesses both singers correctly gets a virtupie of their choice of flavor. If you also guess the right song, that means double the pie! Now kindly update, or I will be sad.