Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize except the plot and Sonia
Dear Sirius,
I find myself crying when you are not around. It kills me to think that I ever loved you. You hurt me so bad but you will never know, you will never understand. This pain is less a virtue, something I must learn to go on with. I have made a mistake in falling in love with you though. And this mistake is hard to let go of.
I always thought, how foolish was I, that you could never hurt me like this. I saw what my best friends went through and through it all I has thought to myself that you would never do me like this. But then you did. At first I tried to deny it, telling myself that it wasn't you. But then it was clear in front of me that you were.
All those times you disappeared, all of those times you said you were practicing yet I saw you friends and teammates right here. I never thought I would have to see this day. You had said you loved me, then why did you do this?
Why did you bend to break me? I believed in you, I thought you had changed, but I guess I was wrong. Maybe you were to deep in to come out of your old ways. For once I can't say. I thought it was wrong, we all did, we all thought you had changed, even your best friends. I guess even you really had us all fooled, Black, you really did.
I don't know why I am writing you this letter. I don't see why I should go ahead and bother with it at all. But I think you know. I loved you with my heart and soul. I had tried so hard not to, you promised me that you had changed, I didn't believe it, at least not at first. But then I saw some changes, if only I knew they were probably all just set ups,
They say true love had no boundaries and we always believed that our love was true, but I don't think that 'no boundaries' included what you did to me. You stole my heart and broke it repeatedly. I thought that I would have been enough for you. But I guess my love was just never enough. You hd to go back to her, the one person I hated more than anything. You said you had nothing to do with her and that you hated her but that was probably all a drama as well.
I don't have anything else to say to you but I just want to know one thing. WHY?
Why did you play me for a fool? Why did you take my love for granted? Why did you make me fall for you? Did you think it was another one of your jokes; to play me saying that you love me when you didn't, tell me. Was it a joke or a dare or even a bet, saying that you could make me fall in love with you like your little fan club? I can't even say more as my tears are blurring vision. What can I say to you Sirius? I loved you so much. You were there when no one else was. But I guess that was just another big farce wasn't it. Please tell me, was I anything to you? Did we mean anything to you at all?
Oh forget it, I guess it was a joke to you; I don't even want to hear it. But what have you done to me? I can't eat, I can't sleep, and all I do is think about you. Please end this damn spell. I need to move on, and pick up the pieces of my broken heart.
Claim all you want that it wasn't you but I am no fool. I would recognize your face anywhere. I love you remember? Merlin, I sound so foolish, you are probably reading this laughing. But that is you, laughing at others pain and embarrassment.
It doesn't matter anymore though does it? I am leaving, Sirius, and I don't think I will be coming back. By the time you read this, I will be gone, though I don't think you care. I just wanted to tell you that I love you, Sirius and I always will. No matter what happens from here on out. But you won't care. I don't think you ever did. Think not to look for me, for I have gone where from none return, not that you will ever care.
Good bye my love,
Sonia Cheireveux
P.S. It is my only request that you not make such fake promises to another. No one deserves to go through that heartache.
Please R&R
A/N this is only the prologue, I am thinking to have a reply to her letter or/and a story to go along with it. Let me know what you think though!