Title: You Love Me But You Don't Know Who I Am
Author: alienangel19852003
Summary: Leo kills Gideon before Chris fades away and he manages to heal him. Chris is unable to return to his own time so he is stuck in the present. The Elders give him a new charge and Chris has to start over.
Rating: M
AN: This is an AU story. It is rated M for a reason and that is because it contains a substantial amount of swearing abuse physical violence and mention of rape and incest. Also guy on guy action.
This chapter contains a violent flashback and subject matter pertaining to a rape. If you do not want to read this skip down to the bottom of the chapter, I promise the other chapters will not contain flash backs like this.
After talking with his mother Chris went and lay down on the couch he had every intention of watching some MTV but instead he fell asleep. Chris hadn't had any nightmares or any flash backs about the time he spent chained up in the basement.
Chris dreams he is falling. Falling further and faster until he hits the floor. Landing face down on cold concrete. The fall didn't hurt as much as the recognition of his surroundings. He was in the basement, naked, chained to the wall.
He wants to scream orb do anything just to not be there. He tried orbing but his powers were being blocked by the chains on his wrists.
He calls for his aunts, for his mom even for Leo. No one comes. The passing of time means nothing in basement. An hour feels like a year and year feels like a millennium.
He hates the solitude but loathes the company even more because he knows if Wyatt comes down those steps it was going to hurt. It always hurt, that was the only pain was the only thing that was ever constant in his life.
When the basement door opens and Chris hears the heavy footfalls he winces and prays to whatever Gods are listening that Wyatt is alone and not with another demon whom he will be 'lended to'. He finally lifts his head to look up at his older brother.
Wyatt's smile is feral, "I've missed you little brother. Did you really think you could get away? From me?"
Wyatt's blue eyes are twinkling with something Chris could not name.
"Did you really think that you could change things? You a miserable little half breed with a misplaced sense of loyalty?"
Wyatt pauses to laugh at him and then he turned deadpan serious, "This is all your fault if you hadn't been so stupid."
Wyatt stalks closer to Chris who shuts his eyes he knows what comes after the taunting and the blame.
The fists.
"Those demons would have never attacked."
Wyatt punctuates every accusation with kicks and punches and the blows rain down on Chris,
"The Power of Three wouldn't have been vanquished and we wouldn't be having this conversation."
Though Wyatt is finished with the accusation but he still doesn't seem to be satisfied with how much he has beaten Chris who had once been sitting on the little cot was now on the floor curled up in a submissive fetal position as Wyatt beat him.
Wyatt always goes for the ribs mostly. Chris is sure Wyatt has broken them all at least five times each. Occasionally Wyatt went for the kidneys. Except for a few screams and curses Chris never said much anymore, he never asked him to stop. He just took it like always. He had learned early it was better go along with Wyatt.
Then Wyatt stopped beating him. Chris looked up at him through his long dark hair to see Wyatt taking off his belt. Chris knows what is next. Chris watched as Wyatt undid his pants.
"I would have killed you some time ago if you weren't so…" Wyatt let the words trail off.
Wyatt pulls Chris to his feet. Chris stands up straight trying not to wince and looks Wyatt in the eye even though he was the shorter of the two. Wyatt's hands were on his face.
"Beautiful." Wyatt finally finished the sentence.
From his expression Chris could see that he meant it.
"Would you go ahead and take what you want instead of creeping me out." Chris said only to receive a hard smack in the face for his trouble.
Chris brought a hand to his lip and saw that it was bleeding.
Though, actually he was far from creeped out. He wanted to hear those words from someone else. He didn't know who yet but it sure as hell wouldn't be Wyatt. Hands are on his throat though they weren't choking him just shoving him down on the cot.
He tries to squirm away. He tries anything to get out from under Wyatt. Wyatt flipped Chris over so he was on his hands and knees. Chris shut his eyes tight. This would hurt.
Wyatt pushed in no preparation whatsoever. It hurt so much and yet it felt so good. Wyatt times the strokes to match his thrusts. Soon he starts to lose all rhythm and control. Chris knows what is next the best and the worst part of the whole situation.
Wyatt bites his shoulder. Chris knows he is trying to stave off the inevitable. Chris erupts in Wyatt's hand trying not to scream. A second later Wyatt comes too. Chris felt the heat spilling inside him.
He woke up feeling insistent hands shaking him by the shoulders. His eyes fluttered open and he looked up at his aunt Phoebe whose eyes fluttered open a second later she looked more afraid than he was. "Oh my God." She whispered. He knew that she had seen everything. "Don't tell them." He whispered back.
AN: I do not own the lyrics to Better Than Ezra's Desperately Wanting. It is like one of the best songs ever!
Chris started to say something to Phoebe but she ran away from him.
"Phoebe." Chris said getting up and following her up to the attic.
"I'm so sorry, Chris I really didn't know." She said once she reached the Book of Shadows.
She was practically in tears.
"I would appreciate if you didn't tell the others either." Chris said.
"I wonder why I got a premonition of that. I haven't had my powers for months." Phoebe said.
"Maybe your powers are coming back." He offered relieved that she had drawn the conversation back to herself.
However, his relief was short lived.
"How could he do that to you?" Phoebe asked.
Chris blushed he really didn't want anyone know about his life in the future much less see it second hand.
"After. . . the event he changed. It was my fault and Wyatt said it was too. So he decided to punish me." Chris said refusing to meet her eyes.
"He locked you in the basement?" Phoebe asked.
"No that was later. First he would just touch me then beatings and the other stuff came later." Chris revealed.
"You felt guilty about what happens. That's why you came from the future." Phoebe said.
"If that was the case I wouldn't have come all the way back to 2003 to help you guys battle the Titans this was mostly about saving Wyatt." Chris told her.
"Why didn't you tell us," she said.
"I didn't want anyone to know. That was a time in my life I would really like to forget." Chris said.
"No I mean at the time when that was happening, maybe Paige and I could have–"
"You guys weren't around anymore," he said averting his eyes.
He hadn't meant to tell her all that but he just felt she needed to know. Damn his empathy. Damn it to hell.
"Can we not talk about this any more?" Chris asked.
Phoebe nodded, "If you feel like you need to talk I'm here. I know I speak for Piper and Paige in saying we're all here for you. So I heard about your new assignment."
"Piper told you?" Chris asked.
"She won't shut up about it. She's already talked this woman over in Hart, Missouri who is looking to sublet her apartment and she got you to take over her lease. She's even got Paige out shopping for your apartment." Phoebe said.
"I hope I don't end up with deco arte dragon place mats." Chris said.
"Or a Hello Kitty lamp." Phoebe said.
They laughed.
Piper came up stairs holding Baby Chris.
"What's so funny?" She asked.
"Nothing." Phoebe said.
Chris saw her share conspiratal look with her sister.
"We also thought you should have this." Phoebe said walking over to the other side of the attic.
She brought a guitar case over.
"It was your Grandma Patty's." Piper said from behind him.
Chris was overcome with emotion and this time they were his own. Phoebe handed it to him.
"Don't just stand there play something for us." Piper said. Chris took the guitar out of its case. Despite the fact that it hadn't been played in nearly 30 years it was still in tune.
He closed his eyes and started to play Desperately Wanting by Better than Ezra.
He did a short introduction and then he started to sing, "I remember running through the wet grass, falling a step behind, both of us never tiring desperately wanting. I remember running through the wet grass, falling a step behind, both of us never tiring desperately wanting."
He sang the chorus first and then went straight into the second verse.
"When they pumped out your guts , filled you full of those pills , you were never quite right, deserving all the chills, they say the worst is over, kicked it over and ran , then they ask what went wrong, when they turn you on again, they turn you on again."
"I remember running through the wet grass, falling a step behind, both of us never tiring desperately wanting. I remember running through the wet grass, falling a step behind, both of us never tiring desperately wanting."
Chris strummed the guitar furiously as if his life depended on it. He was totally in his own world when he played.
"Kick them right in the face, make them wish they weren't born, and if they bring up your name, well they'll say you won the war, baby burst in the world , never given a chance, then they ask what went wrong, when you never had it right."
"Oh, the letters have dropped off, though they say you got them all, I finally figured out some things you'll never know, take back your life and let me inside, we'll find the door if you care to anymore."
"I remember running through the wet grass, falling a step behind, both of us never tiring, desperately wanting. I remember running through the wet grass, falling a step behind, both of us never tiring desperately wanting."
When he finished the song he finally came back to himself and remembered he wasn't alone in the room. He blushed and sat the guitar down.
"You're really good." Phoebe said.
"Phoebe what are you talking about he's fabulous" Piper said.
"Really?" He asked.
"I've never really played in front of anyone before." He admitted.
"Well," Piper said looking down at Baby Chris, "It looks like someone's getting music lessons."