The end… how strange. It's making me sad. There's a lot of stuff in this one. It's really more of a giant wrap-up chapter than an epilogue. I don't want to post this, because then it would be gone, but if I don't everyone will get mad at me for not finishing it… Ah, well. I've started typing another story, so I can use that to keep me entertained. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I could say this is mine

But that isn't true!

Chapter Eight: Punch

FIVE YEARS LATER

James was walking Lily back to her flat after a date. They had reached her doorstep and he was about to kiss her goodnight, when he said something.

"Hey, Lils?"

"Yeah?"

"Wanna marry me?"

Lily was at the church. She had on a lovely white dress, a veil, a bouquet, the whole nine yards. Her emerald eyes and cherry hair contrasted very well with all the white, and Jessi thought she looked gorgeous. And said so. Well, made her opinion known.

"AAAAAAAH! LILY YOU LOOK WONDERFUL!" she shouted. Abby, who was standing right next to her in an identical bridesmaid's dress, winced. Grace, however, was having problems.

"Um…Lily…I know it's your wedding day and everything, but the groomsman who I was supposed to walk down the aisle with seems to have disappeared," she said.

"Peter's gone…?" Lily looked shocked. She opened her mouth to start worrying, but Abby interrupted her.

"Lily, worrying is not going to help. Everything will be fine. I'm sure Jessi and Sirius can find a suitable groomsman in four hours." She had placed her hand over Lily's mouth to keep her from saying anything.

"Why do I have to go?" Jessi wanted to know.

"Because, you're the best at attracting guys, and Sirius would be the one most likely to be able to talk someone into doing it," Abby told her in an annoying know-it-all voice. "Let's go find him," she added.

"So I get to spend quality time with Lilykins!" Grace said, hugging the bride, who now looked as though she was about to faint. You might faint, too, if Sirius Black were the only possible way for your wedding to go on properly.

"So, Mrs. Lupin, how is it, exactly, that Abby managed to talk you into doing this?" Sirius said as they scouted out possible replacements.

Jessi looked absolutely tickled to be addressed as Mrs. Lupin, as they had only been married a few months. "She said it in that scary smart person's voice she's got. Not the excited nerd one, the scary genius one."

"The scary genius one? The one that makes her sound like a really evil criminal mastermind?"

"Like the brains behind the Mafia? Yeah, that one."

"I'm sorry. How about that guy?"

"Grace is six inches taller than him, even without her shoes. Definitely a no." The guy in question looked to be even shorter than six inches shorter than Grace, actually.

"Well, then how's that guy?"

"He's got to be at least seven feet tall. We'd all look ridiculous standing up there." Suddenly, Jessi spotted someone.

"Hey, isn't that—"

"—Gilderoy Lockhart? You seriously think he'd do?"

"Well, he looks good, he's about the right height, and he's stupid enough to get drunk enough to pass out during the reception."

"Good point. Hey, Lockhart!"

After that, the wedding went on without a hitch. But, of course, there was always the reception…
Sirius wandered over to the punch table. Without looking in the least suspicious (if it was possible for him to not look suspicious), he carefully slipped a small amount of firewhiskey in. Let the fun begin…
Lily looked at all of the guests at her wedding, and sighed happily. James wrapped an arm around her waist.

"Happy, Lils?" he whispered in her ear, sending shivers up her spine. She leaned against him in response. And then, quite suddenly, it was time for the bride and groom to dance.

James led Lily onto the dance floor and wrapped his arms around her. She buried her face in his chest and he rested his chin on top of her head as the music began to play. As they danced, James surveyed all of their guests.

Everyone was there. There were his parents, Lily's parents, that drunk guy from the Fireball's Feast, even the barmaid. (Of course, the barmaid was a friend Lily knew through Abby.) He thought he could see Gilderoy Lockhart passed out in a corner, and in the opposite corner Remus and Jessi were snogging. Abby was talking to a guy, both of them poring over a large book, never mind how it got there. Sirius was standing near the punch. He saw Severus Snape sitting at a table looking bored, and wondered vaguely why Lily had invited him. But, quite frankly, he was too happy to care just then.

"Told you I'd get you someday, Lily Potter," he whispered to her. She looked up at him and grinned.

"You did, didn't you."

"Yes, I did. I've just said that."

Several hours later, the barmaid, whose name was Allison, was talking to Abby.

"So…this Snape character…does he like firewhiskey?"

"I'd assume so," said Abby, wondering why on earth she should know Severus Snape's drinking habits.

"Great! I've got three ideas. We can (a) spike his firewhiskey with a love potion, (b) spike his firewhiskey with stale butterbeer, or (c) spike his firewhiskey like a volleyball and hit him in the face with it."

"…Must you always come up with strange things for us to do to ruin formal occasions?"

"We're not ruining it, persay, rather improving it. Wouldn't James and Lily want to remember their wedding?"

"I don't think Lily would appreciate it quite as much as James would."

"Ah, well. You can't have everything."

Three hours later, most of the guests were either drunk, or hiding under tables. That is, hiding under the tables that people weren't dancing on top of.

Lily was staring at her guests in utter horror. James sat down next to her sadly. "I'm sorry, Lils," he said, looking at her.

She gave him a watery smile. "At least the ones who will remember it have enough tact to not mention it," she said. He wrapped her in his arms and the two of them stayed like that for the rest of the evening.

In fact, they didn't even look up when Allison really did spike Snape's firewhiskey like a volleyball. Unfortunately, her aim was off, and it hit the drunk guy instead. The force of the impact, combined with too much alcohol, knocked him out and he stayed like that for the rest of the evening.

After their disastrous reception, however, things went pretty well for James and Lily. He became an Auror as everyone had expected, and she started her career as a healer at St. Mungo's. Soon after that she went on maternity leave, and then Harry was born, and you do, of course, know the story after that. Who doesn't?

Jessi got a job as a fashion designer at Madam Malkin's, while Remus was shunted from job to job with whoever would hire a werewolf. Both were members of the Order until Jessi was killed during a Death Eater attack on their home.

Grace married a man called Charles Honeyduke, and together they started a candy shop in Hogsmeade.

Abby never married, but went on to become a Potion's Mistress, occasionally entertaining herself by making Snape's cauldron blow up during training. Her muggle sister, however, married a man by the name of Jim Granger, and Abby spent quite a bit of time teaching their daughter, Hermione, anything she wanted to know.

Sirius was an Auror with James until his "betrayal" and consequential trip to Azkaban. This was, of course, all Peter's fault.

A lot of this may seem a bit depressing, but I assure youthat everyone was quite happy. While they were alive, that is.

The End.