AN: I made Sean the way he is for a reason. A lot of stuff happens when you're gone from your friends for almost a year. –nods- Anyway, I decided to update this today, hope you enjoy. Please leave your comments and reviews; I would very much love to see them, thanks a bunch and thanks to everyone who has read this so far. Muahz.

Ellie's heart was pounding against her chest. A part of her was squirming to understand why her mother had found her way back to drinking, and another part of her didn't want to hear any of it. She wanted to yell at her mother, scream at her for being so stupid, for drinking again. The two of them had worked so hard to get where they are now and her mother ruined it for her, ruined every little bit of it. Ellie was on her own now, but she was slipping away from any sort of accomplishment. She couldn't handle keeping away from something so addicting on her own. To her, cutting was just as addicting as drinking was.

"Mom..." She had to know. Ellie wanted to help her mother, she wanted to understand. What could be so drastic to make her mother this way, and now?

"Eleanor, your father isn't going to come back."

"W-what do you mean?" Her face turned a pristine white as she stared into her mother's eyes. She could see her own reflection; she could see how white she was at the moment.

"Your father found someone else. He's very sorry..." Mrs. Nash couldn't hold in the tears any longer and she let them slide down her face. "Ellie...what are we supposed to do?"

"I..." Her world had turned upside down. First Sean coming back and trying to take advantage of her and now this. Her father leaving her mother for another women. Is that why he hadn't bothered to call them until now? He was sorry. Ellie couldn't feel any of that inside her; she couldn't feel that he was sorry at all. A sort of hatred filled her heart for her father now. She had certain distaste for men who cheated on their wives and left them for another woman. The redhead couldn't think, let alone breathe correctly. She was sobbing now, her tears rolling down her eyes. She needed someone to hold, Craig, she needed him, but he wasn't here. Cutting? No, no she couldn't do that again, her mother would kill here. But what was she going to do? Ellie got up from the couch staring at her distraught mother. She couldn't take this anymore, she didn't care. Ellie handed her mother the Vodka, she simply didn't care.
"I have to be alone..."

Ellie wiped her tears from her eyes and cursed at her father inside her head. She hated the man more than anything right now and she hated herself for promoting drinking to her mother. Why had she even handed the Vodka back to her at all? More tears flowed down her face as she sat down on her bed. She stared at herself in the mirror.

A petite girl was looking back at her, her face white as a ghost and her eyes red from crying too much. She noticed the rubber band on her wrist and started snapping it several times. It hurt, but not enough. She needed release; she needed to feel another pain, one that wasn't inside her. It was too much for her to bear. She pulled the rubber band as far as she could out and snapped it. Her lips uttered a small gasp; it wasn't hurting, she was still crying.

Biting her lip, she got to her feet and headed towards closet. She opened it up and looked inside. There were many heaps of clothes and other items inside. She rummaged through a small pile that lay on the ground that was in the corner of the closet. She picked up the small black box and opened it up. All her utensils that she had used for cutting herself lay in here. A cynical smile appeared on her face, but it quickly faded away from her lips as she picked up a razor blade.

She placed the box on the ground as she fumbled to sit on her bed. Ellie's eyes averted to the razor blade that lay in her right hand. She stared at it, craving it, wanting the satisfaction of relief. She rolled up the black skirt she was wearing and looked at the white flesh of her thighs. This time she wasn't going to make the mistake of anyone finding out about her secret. No one was even allowed to look at her near her special area; she found a safe place, her thigh.

Her right hand pressed the blade into her thigh, slowly sliding it across. A tiny gasp escaped from her lips. She never realized that it hurt so much to do it, but she wanted to do it more, she needed to. In rage, she started slicing her leg back and forth, blood seeping out from each wound she was making. Ellie's heart was beating incredibly fast as she finally stopped slashing her thigh. She looked at the damage and noticed that her thigh was now completely raw, filled with blood trickling down onto her bed. She stood up, pacing back and forth.

It felt so nice to have this cool sensation running down her leg, the blood was so thick, so red, she loved the sensation. It took her mind off of the pain that was rushing through inside her. She didn't have to think about her mother, her father or even Sean to that matter. The redhead clenched her fist tightly. The only thing that she could think of was the pain from the cuts on her leg. Did she regret any of it? No, not this time, she had enjoyed feeling that pain she was so familiar with.

Then, it all came back to her. Her father, her mother, Sean. Ellie's head was pounding with confusion. She did care if the blood trickled onto her sheets now; she ran to her bed and screamed into her pillow, screamed so very loud. Her sobs grew louder and louder until she couldn't cry anymore. Ellie wanted to die; she wanted to die so bad. All this pain needed to go away, but there was no way it was going to, ever. Her father had left her mother and now her mother was drinking again. Sean, he was back and he still loved her, yet he nearly raped her just an hour ago. How could this day have happened? So many thoughts trailed in her mind, but they eventually faded away as she drifted off into a deep sleep.