"Hold on, dreamaway, you're my sweet charade." The Goo Goo Dolls, "Hate This Place."


"Oh, Mustang, sir." Alphonse Elric smiled brightly up at the man.

"Alphonse." Roy Mustang nodded, and marveled again at the young man standing before him, whole and healthy and, if the wedding announcement was any indication, happy as could be. "I hope you don't mind if I came a little early. I'm staying in the inn at the town."

"Oh, it's no problem!" Alphonse smiled wider. "But if you're looking for my brother, I'm afraid you'll have some problems. He's gone walkabout."

Roy quirked an eyebrow at the unfamiliar term. "Walkabout?"

"Oh, yes. He left this morning with a sandwich." Alphonse looked out at the falling dusk. "And he has probably forgotten to come back. Well, you can go out and look for him with me, if you want. If I don't drag him back, he'll miss supper and stay out all night." Alphonse stood with a sigh, and set aside the tools he had been cleaning for Winry.

This most certainly did not sound like the Edward Elric Roy had known less than two years past. Roy was a little concerned. "He does this often?"

"Oh, yes. Let's see, if he's remembered to start home, he'll be in the field. If he hasn't, he'll probably be by the river..." Alphonse wandered for the door and stepped out without touching the shoes beside it. "Shall we split up? The field's closer."

"I think I can manage a walk to your river," Roy replied. "Where is it?"

"If you're sure, sir. If you take the road, which Ed never does, you can reach it fairly quickly. He'll probably be either by the bridge or near the ford. The ford is down past the bridge, off the road." Alphonse pattered down the front porch steps. "Oh!" He darted back up them, and stuck his head in the house. "I'M GONNA GO FIND ED!"

Winry's voice called back an answer. "FIND HIM FAST, I'M STARTING SUPPER!"

"OKAY!" Alphonse pattered back to where Roy stood. "Let's go."

They wandered down the road. Despite Winry's admonishment, Alphonse set an easy amble as the pace, meandering along with his hands in his jeans pockets, discussing alchemic theory with Roy. The road met a plot of fenced in land, and Alphonse stopped.

"Well, here's my stop. The river's only a little ways ahead. You can hear it from here. Ed can bring you back if you find him, but if you don't then I'll find you both." Alphonse nodded, then vaulted over the fence without touching it. At an easy lope, he took off across the grassy field, all long legs and bare feet and graceful motion.

Roy shook his head, and listened. He could indeed hear the river, but it took him a good deal longer than he had expected to find the mentioned bridge. The shadows were long and the sun was setting its edge to the horizion before he reached it. But there, he didn't have to search any farther. A large solid black dog, still gangly like a puppy, wagged its tail at him and barked from the riverbank. Seated beside the dog, with feet in the river, was a slender form. Roy managed the steep roadside down to the river, and found the puppy was delighted to see him. He petted it, then wandered up to look down at the blonde.

Edward Elric looked up at him with a dreamy, almost blind recognition that scared Roy very much. The young man was certainly Edward; lean, lacking in stature, with a long blonde braid and golden eyes. That expression, however--soft, unfocused, and certainly not in touch with reality--was utterly unlike the Edward Roy had known not two years past.

"Ben, here," Edward called, and though it was the same timbre and tenor, the tone was alien as his expression--gentle, subdued. The dog came obediently, and Edward reached up to stroke its head. "Where's Al?"

For a moment, Roy did not realize he was being adressed. It took him another moment to compose himself for speech. "Up the road, looking for you."

"Oh." The utterance was soft as the breeze. Edward leaned forward, and brushed his fingertips across the running water. "It's almost night. I wasn't watching..." With a slow, dreamy grace, he sat up, then stood. He dusted his clothes off mechanically, and snapped his fingers, though the dog was already at his side.

Roy was uncertain, something which didn't happen often. This quiet, dreaming creature was nothing like the Edward he remembered. With a slow, easy gait, Edward headed for the road, feet bare, jeans rolled up around his calves, wet up to his knees, hands tucked into his pockets. At the embankment, he paused, and looked round absently. His gaze landed on Roy, and that same dreamy recognition showed.

"Well, come on," he called, gently. He started up to the road. Worried, Roy followed.

Edward lingered until Roy had gained the bank, then snapped to the dog that waited at his heels. The blonde drifted along, occasionally snapping his fingers for the dog. The dog never strayed too far, even when Edward paused and examined random weeds, or simply stopped and stared off into the distance. Roy found himself more and more worried about the state of Edward's mind.

They reached the yard as the sun was almost completely gone. Alphonse was perched on the porch railing, apparently waiting. He jumped down, and greeted the eager dog, then walked up to Edward, who had stopped, staring into the nether distance. Alphonse hugged Edward, softly, carefully. "Took you long enough to get home," he admonished.

Edward hugged him back, nestling close. "Sorry. I wasn't paying attention."

"Silly." Alphonse ruffled his brother's hair. "Come on. Winry's almost finished with supper. She nearly beat me when I came home without you." Alphonse led the way up the porch. "Mustang, sir, it's very late. Have supper with us, and stay the night."

"Oh, I couldn't," Roy began.

"Al's right. It is late, though I don't notice." Edward nodded his head towards the house. "At least have supper." And with that, he ambled up the porch steps and into the house, snapping his fingers for the dog to follow.

Roy caught up with Alphonse on the porch. "Wait...Alphonse, is Fullmetal...is your brother all right? He seems..."

"Allright?" Alphonse asked, tilting his head in a birdlike way. "Oh, he's perfectly allright, Mustang. Don't worry. Come on, Winry will kill us if we're late for supper."

Thus Roy found himself seated at the table, watching while Alphonse set the places and Winry began bringing out food. Edward came wandering in just as Winry sat down. There was still the dreamy absent manner about him, but something in his eyes reminded Roy of the Edward he remembered. The dog, Ben, came as well, and laid under the table by Edward's chair. A golden tiger-stripe tabby came clamoring in late during the meal, begging for tidbits.

When the meal, oddly lacking in conversation, had ended, Alphonse and Winry began the cleaning up. Edward drifted out to the porch, along with both the animals. Roy followed at the suggestion of Alphonse. He came out, and found Edward in one of the rocking chairs, rocking slowly, with the cat in his lap and the dog at his feet. He looked up as Roy came near, and the starlight and moonlight turned his dreamy expression serene. Roy sat down in the second chair, and couldn't help but study his companion out of the corner of his eye.

"The dog is named Ben, in case you didn't know, and the cat is Ochibisan." Edward scratched the cat behind its ears. "It's been a while, hasn't it? How long...one...two years, I think, since I've seen you. Of course Al would invite you to the wedding."

Again, Roy almost didn't realize he was being adressed. The quiet, gentle tone made it seem as though Edward was talking to himself. "Not quite two years. Ah...Fullmetal..."

Edward laughed, and it was a rich, pleasant noise. "That's not my name any more, sir. Edward is my name. Call me that." He turned a vague smile Roy's way. "What shall I call you? You're not a Colonel any more. I do remember that."

"Mustang is fine," Roy answered, cautiously. "Fu--Edward...I, ah..."

"Mmm, it's not often you're speechless." Edward glanced sideways at him, but the expression lacked the fire, the comment lacked the bite, that it should have possessed, that Roy remembered so well. "What are you trying to ask me? I'm not coming back to the military, if that's what you want."

"No, I don't. I...after the changes, people like you and me aren't needed anymore." Roy flexed his hands, and sighed.

"No more human weapons," Edward repeated, his voice so soft Roy nearly didn't hear it. "Some would call that good. Others wouldn't...like those who depended on the paychecks." Another laugh, gentle. "Mustang, tell me, is the lovely Hawkeye coming? Where you are, she isn't far behind."

"Riza? Oh, well...she's coming..."

"Such stammering. You sound like Al when I ask him about Winry." And for a moment, Roy thought he saw a sudden gleam of cunning, of sharpness, in those golden eyes. But when Edward went on, he sounded oblivious. "It's very funny, really. Such a big fuss...and Winry trying to keep me at home so she won't lose me before the wedding. Al won't let her. Lucky he's on my side...I'd never get away if he wasn't."

"Why do you...get away?" Roy asked.

"Oh, I don't really know." Edward leaned over the purring cat to pat the dog. "I tried to explain, once...Al understands. And that's enough. It always is." He sat up again, and pushed at the floor, his rocker creaking. "The moon will be full for the wedding. Al will like that." He was silent. And then, he stopped the rocker. He twisted his upper body to look fully at Roy, and suddenly his face was set, serious, grounded in reality. The determination and fire in those eyes were the same as Roy recalled. He was startled by the change.

"Mustang, what would you do if you learned that everything you had known for so long was nothing but a lie?"

Roy blinked. "I...I don't know."

The fire and passion faded back into the dreamy gaze, as the earth is veiled by mist. "And lies and dreams are nothing but breath," Edward whispered. He straightened, and stared up at the moonlight. "Alchemy...nothing is like I learned. It's not like I thought...and I thought, I thought I knew..." He reached out a slow, thin hand, and cupped it to the moonlight. He held it there, as though holding something precious, then slowly widened his fingers and withdrew his hand from the light.

The door opened and shut. Bare feet padded across the boards. Alphonse came into Roy's view, and walked behind Edward's chair. He slowed the rocking, then draped himself across the back, hugging his brother. "Isn't it beautiful, brother?" Alphonse asked.

"It is." Edward leaned into the touch, stretched to press his cheek to his brother's. "And so quiet. But...it is lonely, isn't it?"

"Lonely? I suppose." Alphonse looked out across the moonlit yard. "Only if you let it be."

"I can't help it. It feels lonely...so quiet, so beautiful...but alone. And somehow untouchable." Edward's hand drifted up to wind in his brother's ponytail. "Not fragile, but...intangible...as a dream."

"Not all dreams are untouchable." Alphonse smiled. "You know that."

"Yes...that's right." Edward's smile was sweet and wide, but Roy shuddered to see the distance in those eyes.


"I ain't messin' with another life. Can I get on without you? Tell me lies that you know I need..." The Goo Goo Dolls, "Hate This Place"