That evening Kurai called her. "Hi, Shizuru, I wanted to be the first one to tell you. My girlfriend and I got back together," he said happily. "I love her so much and I just couldn't be without her, I still care about you as a friend though. I really want us to still be friends but my girlfriend is kind of nervous about it, so you can't come to the apartment or anything. But we can still meet for a movie or something, ok?"
Shizuru felt the phone slide from her nerveless fingers and saw it hit the floor and shatter into a million pieces, just like her heart... She turned and walked zombie-like from the house, thoughts racing through her head. He said that he had to think about things, but he broke up with her. If he was just going to go back to her, what was the point? He didn't even try to get to know me better when he was thinking about things. He didn't even see me. Or hug me, or hold me when I cried.
He doesn't care.
And I'm alone. He left me, but in a much more painful way than Sakyo. Sakyo didn't choose somebody else, he died.
And I want to die too.
I opened my heart to Kurai and he betrayed my trust. Whenever I try to love someone it always ends horribly. Death and betrayal, can it get any worse?
Shizuru turned and ran blindly for the park where she had gone that day to mourn Sakyo. She saw the paths she had walked with Kurai and the memories beat at her. Am I destined to find love only to be torn apart by the pain? Why? I loved them both and one left me through death and the other left me for another.
Shizuru looked up and saw the lights of the docks ahead. She crumpled to the ground, filled with thoughts of death and despair. Why did they leave me alone? Am I so worthless that I'm not worth loving? Why must I feel this unending pain? All I wanted was somebody to love and cherish.
She walked toward the docks, staring down at the crashing water. The water is calling to me…. She slowly moved towards it, wading out into the water and starting to swim further into the sea. She swam until her arms were tired and she couldn't see land anymore. She turned and looked back, tears in her eyes.
I just wanted somebody to love me. Was that so much to ask?
And she let her body slide underneath the water, giving in to the thrashing waves and sliding beneath the sea.