How it Should Be

Waking up in the arms of Lucas Scott was something that felt so utterly right to her. With Jake, this feeling had been so different. At the time, it was what felt right to her; it was the one thing that had made her feel whole in the circumstances. In her mind, Jake had been the one to save her from herself, but she knew that it was Lucas who had orchestrated the whole thing in hopes of making her happy. In hopes of giving her someone who was willing to give her what she was afraid of giving her.

As she watched him, Lucas remained asleep. His deep, slow breaths soothed her, and Peyton rested her head against his bare chest. She could hear the beating of his heart, the calmness of everything around her. This was what she had been waiting for, what she had been searching for. Finally being able to have made her feel so whole.

Slowly, she got out of bed and pulled on her clothes, the last thing she put on was Ellie's cancer bracelet. Today, she was going to right another wrong in her life, and she knew that Lucas would be there at her side to help her throughout the entire thing. Just like had been there for her ever since this whole this with Ellie had started. When everyone else had abandoned her, he had been there and that's what mattered to her.

Putting on her shoes, she slipped out her phone from the pocket of her jeans and noticed the messages that had been left on them. All from either Haley or Brooke and guilt rumbled through her stomach again. She couldn't help but feel guilty and selfish for being here with Lucas, for being so happy for once when Brooke was sad and broken. She ran a hand through her blonde hair and took a breath. What was she supposed to do? How was she supposed to tell Brooke the truth?

"Hey," Lucas roused, sitting up in bed and looking at her with a tired, groggy smile.

"Hey yourself," she couldn't help but smile back, despite all the doubts she was having that this was, in fact the right thing to be doing in this moment.

Happiness was important to her. She'd been struggling and drowning for too long for years, searching for someone to save her. Her art, her room, everything she had ever done was proof of that, and she'd finally found someone who got her, completely. The only problem was that her happiness seemed to cause so many people around her pain. It just didn't seem fair to her.

"Are we doing the right thing Lucas?" she asked, "Being together. I mean, Brooke's my best friend, and I know she loves you. I don't want to lose her."

"I can't lose you again Peyton," Lucas told her, "I love you and I can't not be with you."

Peyton knew that he wasn't lying to her. She knew they had talked about this last night, but she didn't want to be the bitch her subconscious was. Her and Brooke seemed to have managed to move past what had happened last year without any problems, but somehow she didn't think it was going to work out so well this time around. Brooke wouldn't just be able to forgive and forget this same betrayal twice.

Her room was dark when she entered it. Lucas had told her to meet her at his mother's café in an hour, ready to go on their road trip to find Ellie. If anything, Peyton was going to be there for her and support her through her last days or even months. No matter what, if Ellie died, Peyton wouldn't feel guilty about pushing another person out of her life. She wanted to get to know her mom before it was too late. Especially since it seemed they had so much in common.

Opening the light, she was surprised to find Brooke lying there on her bed, sound asleep. Moving over to her, Peyton sat at the end of the bed and put her hand on her best friend's side. The first thing she notices as Brooke slowly woke up was that her eyes were puffy and red, as if she'd cried herself to sleep the night before. Peyton knew without a doubt that she had too. She'd seen Brooke run off from visiting Lucas, and she couldn't help but feel like a horrible friend for not going after her.

"Hey there pretty girl," she greeted her friend, trying not to let her guild get the better of her.

"He hates me Peyton," Brooke sniffled, sitting up, "He looks at me as if I'm the worst person in the entire world. I just…what am I supposed to do?"

"Lucas doesn't hate you Brooke," Peyton assured her, stroking her friend's hair gently, "He's just really angry right now. You just…need to give him time."

Everything inside of Peyton told her to tell Brooke what had happened last night. To tell her that she'd been at Lucas', tell her about the predictions, and about how Lucas had admitted to being in love with Peyton. Her heart told her that Brooke deserved to know the truth and deserved to hear it straight up this time, but her mind warned her that Brooke was fragile right now. That hearing these things wouldn't help at all.

"Where were you last night?" Brooke asked, "Haley wasn't answering her phone and she never came home…and you weren't here either."

"I was out…" Peyton told her," Brooke…"

She stopped herself before she could say anymore because Brooke was looking up at her, and when she saw the look of complete misery in her best friend's eyes, she knew that she didn't have the heart to be the one to break it to her. At that moment, she knew that by telling her, her friendship with Brooke would be utterly broken.

Before either of the girls could say anymore, Lucas Scott strolled into the room with two coffees in his hand. His hair was still a mess and he'd thrown on the same clothes he'd been wearing the night before. Peyton froze immediately, glancing between her best friend and Lucas.

"Peyton, I thought we could just leave from…" he stopped the minute he saw Brooke sprawled out on Peyton's bed with tear stained eyes.

Brooke looked more miserable by the second, looking at Lucas and trying to catch his eye. The minute she did though, he looked away. Look straight away from her and at Peyton instead. The blonde caught his eye and the two of them stared at each other, silently trying to decide what to make out of the situation. Trying to decide what they were supposed to do about everything.

Through tear clouded eyes, Brooke looked between them. As Peyton broke her gaze with Lucas, she saw realization and the look of betrayal spread across Brooke's face as she quickly got out of bed and more tears started streaming down her face. Tearing her gaze away, Peyton couldn't look at her anymore, feeling worse than she had in such a long time.

"I can't believe you two," Brooke cried, "Standing there, ready to deny anything I'm about to accuse you of. How could you do this to me again Peyton? How could you when you knew how I felt about him?"

"Brooke," Lucas took a step forward.

"Don't," she snapped; "Don't even try to justify yourself. You go around telling me you're the one for me. Telling me that you want to be with me, and then you decide to sleep with my best friend. The night I admit to you that all summer I thought about you and that I love you."

"Brooke, I'm…" Peyton spoke up, finally looking at Brooke again.

"You're not sorry Peyton, otherwise you wouldn't have done it," Brooke spat. Then, she stormed out of the room, but not before pausing a second to look back at them, "I hope the two of you are happy together. I hate you both."

Sitting in his car, Lucas glanced at Peyton from time to time wondering what was going through her mind. They had left after Brooke's outburst at discovering the two of them together. Peyton still had to find her mother, and Lucas had to think of a way to explain to Brooke everything that had happened. It was going to be hard because she hated them now; she even refused to answer the phone to either of them anymore.

"Is this really worth it?" Peyton wondered, "Is being together really worth losing our friendship with Brooke?"

"Peyton…"

"I love you Lucas, but I just did the exact thing I promised Brooke I would never do again," she sighed, tearing her gaze away from the window to look at him, "I let a guy come between us again, and not just any guy but you. She hates me."

"She'll come around," Lucas assured her.

"No, she won't," she shook her head, "You're the first boy she's been in love with."

"Don't worry Peyton," reaching out, he brushed some of her blonde hair out of her face, "Everything will be okay. I promise."

He wasn't sure if he was promising something completely impossible, but Lucas couldn't help but try and make her feel better. He hated that now that they were finally together, now that they had put aside all their fears and were together that she was having doubts about this being right or not. Maybe they had picked the worse time to get together. Maybe had chosen the more horrible time to admit to her that she was the only girl for him, but he had needed her to know.

Now, they had to deal with the obstacles that came with this admission. He was ready for it though, if it meant being with Peyton he would face everything head on because this was everything he had wanted for as long as he could remember. No one got him like Peyton did. No one could match up to how he saw Peyton and how much he cared for her. He knew that things would be simpler for all of them if had told Brooke he loved her and had just been with her, but right now Lucas didn't want to lie anymore. When he had seen Brooke in bed with Chris Keller, he realized that he wasn't the least bit jealous. Yes, he was angry with her, but he didn't care as much as he should have.

Tears streamed down Peyton's cheeks as she sat in the hospital and cried into her hands. She couldn't understand how things had gotten this bad. A night ago, she'd been so happy. She'd been able to push all her worries and fears and guilt out of her mind, and now they had all come flooding back to her.

They'd gotten to the hospital. They'd found Ellie, but it had been too late. She was gone, the cancer had been so much worse than anyone had anticipated, and her health had declined fast. None of the medications or treatment had been working anymore, and the minute Peyton had walked into the room and saw Ellie she felt such enormous guilt and sadness.

The good-byes had been too fast and Peyton knew she'd lost another person. Someone else had left her and was never going to come back. This kept happening to her, and Goth Peyton's words kept floating back into her mind. It was her fault, she kept pushing people away. She had pushed Ellie away, and look what happened.

Inadvertently, she'd also pushed Brooke away too. She knew what would happen by being with Lucas again, and she'd gone ahead to do it anyway. Her mind had reminded her again and again about what had happened the last time, and she'd gone ahead and done it anyway. Was she really such a horrible person?

After a moment, she felt an arm wrap around her shoulder, and she was reminded that for the first time in a long time, she wasn't alone. Today, she had a shoulder to cry on, someone who was there to hold on to her and make sure she didn't fall off the edge. She loved Lucas even more for it, for just sitting next to her without a word as she cried. He wasn't trying to sugarcoat anything right now as he had in the car, this was real and he was just there to support her.

"Do you want to go home?" he whispered into her ear.

Silently, she nodded and took his hand. He led her out of the hospital, out of the place she hated more than anything in the world. A hospital had taken he mothers away, had almost taken Lucas and Nathan away, would one day take away everyone she cared about. Today though, she had someone standing next to her, holding her together because she couldn't do it herself. For that, she would be eternally grateful.

Tree Hill seemed lonely and desolate as they returned. The entire drive home, Lucas had held her hand and not said a word. They hadn't needed to say a word in order to express how they felt. The guilt was still there and Peyton knew it would always be there, but she also knew that the doubt was gone. She wasn't going push someone else away; she wasn't going to use all of this as an excuse to push Lucas away anymore.

They were just going to have to deal with what had been dealt to them. Of course, they would have to face Brooke, they would have to deal with the pain they had caused her, but eventually she would come around. It would take time and a lot of healing, but that's all they could expect. All they could hope for was that someday she would be able to forgive them for what happened.

"Hey Luke, want to go get some coffee?" she wondered, "And talk."

"Sure," Lucas looked at her and smiled lightly.

"Cool," she nodded her head and then looked back out the window.

They could be a couple. They could work out any of the issues they had had in the past. They could face any obstacles that were thrown at them because when she was around Lucas, she felt stronger. She wasn't weak or alone or depressed. Lucas wasn't going to leave her, he'd always been there for her and she hadn't even known it. No matter what, things would be okay as long as she never let doubt cloud her vision…

Because there was no doubt in her mind, that this is how this were meant to be.

FIN.