Harry awoke the next morning, a volatile mix of fear and anticipation churned in his belly but he muscled it aside today he could not afford to make any emotional slip that could lay bare his past, present, future scheming, to the piercing twinkle of Dumbledore eyes for today he would be the epitome of cunning so much so he would turn old Salazar himself green with envy. Sighing in the face of such silly melodrama Harry turned his attention to Dobby who looked ready to bounce out of his skin he was so exited and anxious about the upcoming day and year.
Dobby bustled about making sure Harry ate breakfast, washed, wore clean clothes, and hadn't forgotten anything, following Dobby's belief that all exciting escapades should be served with a constant stream of light hearted chatter. Harry followed Dobby's commands mechanically they were a daily occurrence, though today Dobby seemed a bit more frantic than usual. Too soon in Dobby's eyes it was time for Harry to leave, they had decided the day before that it wouldn't be wise for Dobby to accompany him lest there be prying eyes of Dumbledore's spy's they had long since come to the conclusion that it was Harry's who had accidentally altered the Dursley's memories or minds during or after the Marge incident since it just didn't make sense that the accidental magical reversal squad wouldn't have noticed a mangled Harry lying on the floor. Harry had to keep a firm grip on Dobby the rest of the day after that conversation to prevent the enraged elf from storming out and butchering the Dursley's on the spot, he was a vicious little devil when need be. After a long tearful goodbye on Dobby's part and a promise to write daily Harry slipped out his window and into the overcast morning of Privet Drive dragging his cumbersome trunk behind him Hedwig perched on his shoulder. Lazily he extended his wand which he had pulled from the holster concealed at his waist as he didn't have a left wrist in which to place it any more.
The large purple triple decker bus popped into existence and a surly bleary eyed Wandtrod welcomed, or rather glared at the boy with a hint of pain to come should he upset the old man in anyway. Briefly wondering if the operators got any sleep Harry boarded the bus taking a seat in a tipsy tartan armchair. After a stomach wrenching journey in which his breakfast almost decided to vacation with the floor and Hedwig decided to take her agitation out on his ear Harry stumbled off the bus to Kings Cross station. After appropriating a trolley Harry calmly walked to platforms nine and ten. He skilfully put up a pensive look and stared between the two for exactly five minutes until he looked clever and walked into the barrier between the two and vanished.
The station was only sparsely filled by eager first year muggleborns who were afraid of being late, Harry calmly made his way past them thankfully non recognized him as the-boy-who-lived and the brief journey went by with out a hitch. Casting a simple feather light charm found in the standard book of spells grade one he stored his trunk and took a seat in an empty compartment near the back of the train. After covertly checking the compartment for all the listening and surveillance charms he could think of he sat down and began to meditate and work on his mind maze.
An hour went by until the compartment door slammed open causing Hedwig to hoot in annoyance from her perch on the luggage rack, Harry went for his wand immediately having broken from his trance. Hermione Granger found herself staring down the point of Harry's wand.
Hermione raised an eyebrow "jumpy are we?"
Harry shrugged "Dobby has been working on my reflexes, having him jump out screaming at you at all hours defiantly hones ones random wand drawing capabilities."
Hermione grinned and wrapped him in a bone crushing hug "it's good to see you Harry, I've missed you. You haven't had any side effects from the you know what?" She released him and looked uneasily around the compartment.
Harry smiled it seems he wasn't the only one to take Madeye Moody's mantra to heart. "Don't worry I already checked and came up with nothing unless he is using something we don't know about I think our conversation will be secure he couldn't really know what compartment I would be in would he, and no there were no side effects."
Hermione looked relieved on both accounts "that's good, I've been worried we really shouldn't have done that until we had studied more."
Harry shrugged again he didn't care if his life had been on the line, it would have been pointless to exist as a powerless marionette if they hadn't don't the ritual he had dark lords to kill he would have been a sitting duck if he had waited around for Hermione to study incessantly for a couple years, he was forced to fight once before untrained and he wouldn't do it again. "It's no big deal Hermione what's done is done, I would have rather had you do it than me by myself."
Hermione looked at him sharply, "are you insane Harry you would have killed your self you can barely chop shrivel figs you can't honestly think you do wield a knife with any amount of precision necessary for such an undertaking." Harry looked hurt, and Hermione sighed "alright you could have but you wouldn't have been able to finish the last bit since you would have fainted by then, and just so you know if you did do that on your own I would have resurrected your sorry corpse and pounded some sense into you head." Smiling sweetly she released him and took seat Crookshanks purring loudly on her lap.
They were interrupted at that moment by a haggard looking Neville Longbottom with a very plump grey cat slung over his shoulder he sat down heavily and his cat hopped away to go sniff Crookshanks, he looked over to Harry and Hermione his face smeared with lipstick. "Those nutty elves could not have meant for this to happen, they said they would spice up my life a bit, I thought hey that might be nice Gran might be a bit calmer maybe a few new rosebushes in the garden, not have me forced to become a international dueller forced to shoot blasts of light at vicious Russians who are three times my size and more likely to hit me than spell me, and to burden me with that," he pointed to his cat who was now ripping at the seat with over long claws, he shuddered "you don't want to know was those things feel like in your leg…" Neville looked at Harry and Hermione as though seeing them for the first time and blushed "sorry I just had to get that off my chest, well I suppose it was worth it since Healer Quadmore didn't die this time around in a freak tickling charm accident, so my parents might get better… Harry you said you lost a bit off your arm you didn't say you lost the whole bloody thing!"
Harry looked sheepish, "Umm you see…" Hermione glared at him. "Err yes that it really isn't that bad those involved have been punished so there is no need to do anything drastic, and I do plan to torture them with vicious fluffy bunnies with fangs, you got to love Dobby he has the greatest ideas at times, but now is not the time, it is part of the master plan." Hermione shook her head and muttered about childish houselves and their protégés.
Neville nodded "can I get a piece of them as well I have a few spells I would like to try out?" Harry shrugged and Neville beamed. The three sat discussing their summers until an exhausted Fred and George stormed in and collapsed onto the seat, they had hunted looking eyes and looked as though they hadn't slept in a month.
Fred shuddered and looked into Harry's eyes, "a word of advice Harry never ever piss Luna Lovegood off."
George nodded fervently, "she is the most spiteful person we know, seriously how much do you have to pay a person back for charming frogs to leap out of a book bag?"
"Not as much as she has I tell you the girl is a menace, we have half a mind to disown you Harry."
Harry looked bewildered between the two twins "what did I do?"
George looked scandalized "you are an accomplice of the enemy, you are the hell spawn's consort!"
Fred eyed Harry up and down "I bet you were in on it weren't you?"
Harry shook his head "I have no idea what you are talking about."
"Don't you dare try to talk your way out of this Potter-" George roared in a voice eerily reminiscent of Severus Snape.
"-You had Luna sentence us to hell, five years of HELL,." Harry had to admit as he sunk lower into his seat Fred did have a way with the dramatic and could be absolutely terrifying if he wanted to be.
Fred and George looked to one another and started cackling as the other occupants looked on in fear, confusion, and exasperation. George sputtered "you should have seen the look on your face," they laughed some more then as quick as it came there mirth was replace with mock solemnity.
Fred looked to Harry "you really are to easily swayed by our acting prowess Harry."
George nodded "it is true Fred my love, but within all kidding there is a grain of truth, Luna Lovegood is evil incarnate."
"Disarming the unwary with her vacant dreamy eyes, like a hell veela with nefarious intentions to break the unbreakable hearts and souls of pranksters."
"Indeed she is, though to be truthful I don't know what we did to piss her off, was it the frogs, the back talking books, the time we charmed the Ravenclaw girls clothes translucent, we just don't know, but to lie about the length of apprenticeships with greasy haired gits that is punishment beyond what ever we did to her multiplied by ten, plus it took us a year to find out we had five years left that was just cruel."
"Most defiantly, though to be honest Snape isn't that bad, true he's meaner than a bugbear in heat, smells bad, and has a serious case of giantacromantulaupass, but he does grow on you after a while, and he let us go home for a week."
George looked at Fred "you traitor you said you would love me forever!" He turned his back to Fred and folded his arms as Neville looked on in shock.
Harry raised an eyebrow "I thought you two were after double jointed twins?"
"We are but Neville is too gullible to pass up, seriously does everyone think that I think that George has a beautiful ass?" Everyone shrugged unsure of how to answer.
"Fred why must you insist on perpetuating the notion of our narcissism?" When Fred didn't answer he sight heavily and continued. "We had better be off then there are first years to traumatize, we can't let this havoc wreaking chance pass us by Snape will have us locked up in the dungeons soon enough." Fred and George swooped out of the compartment in a near perfect imitation of Snape.
Neville breathed out a sigh of relief, "I thought they were going to kill back there."
Harry laughed "I doubt they would have but they look quite scary they really are great actors, I must take notes, Dumbledore won't know what hit him."
Neville looked nervous "are you sure that's wise Harry, Dumbledore is really powerful and has lots of connections who knows what he would do to you if you didn't play into his hand, er I mean seem to play into his hand that wouldn't be good to play into his hand would it you would be totally fucked." Neville's eyes widened and he turned a spectacular shade of red and buried his face in his hand in embarrassment as he stuttered apologies.
Harry sighed "Neville you really need to calm down all you did was swear, that's a good idea, though the master plan will have to be reconfigured, Dobby will not be happy."
Neville did not look reassured "Gran will kill me she has spy's everywhere she will peel off my skin, cut off my tongue..." He broke off suddenly and looked around frantically searching for unseen spy's.
Harry groaned "Neville your Gran doesn't have spy's I bet if you were to scream profanities running up and down the train stark naked she would never know."
"You think?"
"I'm sure off it why don't you pick some thing be creative."
Neville looked unsure but he opened his mouth and croaked out a pitiful stream of minor curses, Harry scoffed Neville really did need instruction, Dobby had been a good influence instructing him, however indirectly, in the more colourful and creative side of the English language while they gorged on Dudley's cereal and watched cartoons. Soon it became a shouting match both Harry and Neville screaming out the worst they could think of, Draco Malfoy left pale faced and looking a little sick before even saying a single criticism or snotty offer of friendship. They continued on until Hermione hit them both with a silencing charm and petrifying hex for good measure as they were looking like they were about to strip and run up and down the train. They sat in silent until they blink promised Hermione to tone their antics down.
Harry bought a pile of chocolate frogs when the food trolley came by, he didn't buy anything else as Dobby had packed him a huge lunch more than five people could eat, Dobby was many things but he was a house elf at heart. He ended up sharing with Neville and Hermione both of whom had not brought anything and had intended to eat Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans. It was around mid afternoon that she showed up.
Nyphadora Tonks metamorphmagus extraordinaire and Harry Potter fanatic with a flair for the dramatic flung open the sliding door to the compartment a magical breeze rustled her bright blue hair it was quite impressive until she stepped into the compartment slipped on the carpet fell on Neville's cat who was snoozing in a patch of sun on the floor. The cat now known as Horace, promptly dug his claws into the stricken girls leg causing her to scream as the incensed cat ripped inch deep gashes down her thigh. Neville tried to pull him off but that only caused a yowling Horace to dig into the plump boys chest, Hermione the only lucid one of the bunch, Harry was dealing with a very angry Hedwig who seemed to take personal offence to the interruption of her nap and was busy taking it out on a swearing Harry. Crookshanks held securely in one arm she stunned Horace with the other allowing a whimpering Neville to pry the claws out of his stomach, with another swish she mutter a healing charm mending the clawed and pecked before her. Hedwig seemed to weigh her options before she flew back to her perch, deciding she wasn't in the mood to be stupefied.
Hermione now turned to a stricken Tonks and with a sternness that would put McGonagall to shame spoke, "was their any particular reason you barged in here?" Tonks stuttered something unintelligible, clearly uncomfortable with Hermione's spot on impression, and hung her head before she dashed out of the compartment. Hermione threw up her hands "I never thought she would be a Boy-Who-Lived fan girl, she seemed to at least have a modicum of professionalism at Number 12," she turned to Harry "you realize this isn't the end of this."
Harry nodded and wished he was oblivious to the rabid fandom as he was when he was eleven before. The train ride continued without a hitch with only the occasional Harry Potter stalker peeping not so inconspicuously through the glass of the compartment door. Harry, Neville and Hermione watched as the country side flew by, the vibrant pre autumn colours fading to shadows as the sun sank in the horizon. At long last the crimson steam engine squealed to a halt at Hogsmead station, the three who had donned their robes and securely caged their pets, who were most reluctant to be confined, slipped into the throng of returning students and pale faced first years who made their way to the carriages and bellowing Hagrid respectively.
Harry and co followed the half giant down the slippery dark path to the lake shore where a fleet of rotten row boats awaited, with fear clear on most of huddled first years faces everyone, though some quite reluctantly, got in for to a boat and at last they pushed off across the still waters which reflected mirror like the few stars glowing weakly in the evening sky. They rounded the bend and a sharp intake of breath and various sounds of awe came from the boats as Hogwarts magnificent visage came suddenly into view. Every window illuminated by flickering torch or candle light the towering buttresses and spiralling towers caused most of the muggleborns and quite a few purebloods to gap wide mouthed in shock and unadulterated excitement.
After a smooth journey across the lake, they reached the vine covered wall of the castle which parted as they floated by into the subterranean chamber beneath the entrance hall. Hagrid led them up the dank stairway and to the charge of a waiting Professor McGonagall who stood tight lipped and ramrod straight as she told them to wait as she went back into the great hall some of the kids starred at Harry's missing arm but none had the guts to ask where he lost it as he was displaying his most menacing glare, which caused Hermione to stifle a giggle, he had been practicing for over an hour before they arrived trying to teach Neville how to be intimidating properly, Neville was glaring right along side him though not to much success his warm round features weren't really suited for fear inducing glares. After the rest of the first years nearly peed their pants when the ghosts arrived they were called into the hall, they quickly formed a double line and walked in.
Harry got into place by Hermione who was clearly resisting the urge to enlighten the ignorant bunch before them who were starring in awe and confusion at the enchanted ceiling. Harry spotted the Weasley twins flanking a murderous looking Snape who was sporting pink, it seemed the twins couldn't even follow there own advice and from the look Snape was giving them they would be lucky to survive the morning. Dumbledore Harry noticed was smiling with benevolence, Harry resisted the urge to sneer manipulative bastard, Harry promised himself he would try to fuck with the old fools plans as much as possible, and professor Quirille his purple turban concealing Voldemort's ugly face was looking as though he was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. At last the group reached the front of the hall where McGonagall explained they were to wear a hat, the sorting hat to be precise, the group gave a collective sigh of relief thanking Merlin it wasn't a troll. The Sorting Hat opened its brim and burst into song.
(Go read the book if your that desperate to know what it says)
The Hall burst into applause at such a rousing and original rendition of the same old crap they had heard every year for the past millennium. With that tired old tradition finished professor McGonagall began to call off names alphabetically and the hat shouted out names the names of the houses Ravenclaw, Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin. Harry only paid half a mind briefly considering the consequences of his actions and how they could have changed the personality of his classmates by they time Hermione's name had been reached and no one had changed houses he was quite unprepared for what happened next.
Hermione eagerly ran up and pulled the ratty old hat over her ears, though she was some what put off that she thought she knew the outcome of this venture, an expectant Hermione waited for the hat to call out Gryffindor, the hats brim curved into a mischievous grin and roared out, Hufflepuff. Hermione sat still for a moment blinking a few times as the Hufflepuff table clapped politely, finally regaining her wits she strode off purposely and took a seat at the end of the table.
Harry stared after Hermione in shock never had he thought his friend would have ended up in Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw maybe but not the badgers house, though thinking on the matter she did have plenty of that houses favoured attributes she was loyal to her friends though she wasn't against putting loyalties aside if she though she knew better, and she was hard working in the extreme, Harry mentally shrugged maybe she would make a good Hufflepuff after all.
Harry watched impassively as the huddled group of first years were slowly sorted, waiting somewhat impatiently for his turn. Nothing had changed at all since his previous sorting, but than again he hadn't done anything earth shattering…yet. At last Neville was called, though he was still nervous he managed not to trip over his own feet this time, he gingerly put the hat on and waited. After sitting on the stool for nearly five minutes during which Neville seemed to get increasingly agitated with the threadbare old hat until the hat opened it's brim triumphantly and shouted Hufflepuff, Neville gave the hat one last glare before he stormed off to sit by Hermione.
More names were called until at last McGonagall called out "Potter, Harry," which jolted him out of his reverie as all eyes in the Hall darted to him, growling under his breath he walked over to the hat and shoved it on his head ignoring the barely hushed whispers that swept through the Hall.
The hats voice soon grabbed his attention though, "ah mister Potter I have been waiting to sort you."
Harry mentally snorted "whatever you stupid hat just sort me already."
The Hat ignored him "Hmmm most interesting it seems I have already sorted you, oh those elves are at it again are they," the hat continued to peruse his memories for a few more moments "well I am quite certain now, though you wont like the repercussions there really is no other place for you but… SLYTHERIN." Harry stared wide eyed from within the hat, he wasn't expecting this, the stupid had had caught him off guard he should have protested like he did before. Without letting a trace of emotion mar his face he took the cackling hat off and placed it on the stool and headed off to the Slytherin table not looking forward in the slightest to sleeping in a cold, damp dungeon.
The hall was completely silent one could have heard a pin drop at fifty paces, the only ones who didn't seem surprised were the twins and Hermione who was giving him a knowing smirk from Hufflepuff which he returned. Dumbledore was looking worried as he stroked his chin, Snape was staring at him in shock obviously not expecting the-boy-who-lived or rather his nemesis's son to be placed in the darker house, and the Gryffindor's were looking betrayed as Harry took a seat at Slytherin table. The Slytherin's themselves were looking none too happy either probably because they were all prepared to hate him and thought he would become a Gryffindor and he just had to get sorted into their house thus they had mixed feelings at the moment. Not that Harry cared his plans had been totally fucked, he thought he would get into Gryffindor like before what had changed since then? A lot it would seem. Not so patiently Harry waited for the rest of the students to be sorted into their houses nothing had changed since before, though Ron's sorting took a few minutes longer then before if he remembered correctly, with the death glares he was giving the twins it was to be expected, Harry was sort of put off Ron had been his best friend before he may not have been the brightest but Harry had hoped to renew some sort of friendship but knowing of Ron's prejudice towards Slytherins that would most likely be next to impossible.
Harry remained quiet throughout the feast ignoring the few Slytherin's who attempted to make friendly overtures, causing them to storm away in a huff, he didn't care he could patch things up later at the moment he needed to think and plan, the master plan before was for him to lay low in Gryffindor and play things by ear doing things like he would have before so as not to raise suspicion, but some where between his meeting with Hagrid and now something went wrong and he was sorted into Slytherin thus ruining any chance at pertending to be a golden boy, he could still try that now but it wouldn't work people would be suspicious of the slimy little Slytherin and what he was playing at. Before he had intended us his magical prowess to sway the ambitious Slytherin's to his side that would still work but the other houses who would have fallen into line instantly if he was a Gryffindor would now hate him. Thinking about it just made his head hurt if he lived through the night he would contact Dobby and they would try to sort this mess out together, resisting the urge to bang his head on the table he pushed those thoughts aside and brought himself back into the present.
The feast had just finished and everyone was heading back into their respective common rooms, wordlessly Harry followed after the Slytherin prefect into the torch lit dungeons. After a twisting and turning journey through labyrinth like underbelly of Hogwarts the first years reached the entrance of the Slytherin common room a patch of slightly off colour stone wall half way down a nondescript corridor. The prefect whispered the password "asp" and the door ground open bathing the first years in warmth and light. The Slytherin common room was much the same as Harry remembered it from his brief visit in his previous second year it was rather large nearly twice the size of Gryffindor's, the ceiling was low giving it the feel of a cave or rather a snakes den, there was a single huge fire place on the right that was carved with various snake motifs, and the room had clusters of couches and chairs under green lamps that didn't give off much light leaving most of the room and its occupants in shadow.
The Prefect spoke up loudly "the girls dormitories are on the left the boys on the right," he pointed to two sets of staircases "first year rooms are both on the second corridor, your names will be above the door, two to a room." He looked around "Slytherin has won the house cup seven years in a row, we have every intention of making it eight, if I find out any of you have lost house points I will personally make your life a living hell," he cracked his knuckles for emphasis. "Now get to bed." The first years walked quickly off to their respective dormitories.
Harry followed slightly slower not afraid of the surly prefect in the slightest, he headed up the staircase to the right and made his way down corridor two looking for his name he found it towards the back framed by Malfoy and his crony who might have been Crabbe. Harry raised an eyebrow "is their any particular reason your blocking the way into my room or are you just illiterate?" in the dim light Harry saw Malfoy pale in anger.
Malfoy puffed out his chest "listen hear Potter, I rule here and your mad antics won't be tolerated," He looked down at Harry with a superior smirk "I have decided to offer my hand in friendship and ignore your past association with mudbloods." He extended his hand.
CRACK. Harry slapped Malfoy across the face, "didn't your mother ever teach you to watch your mouth, that is my best friend your talking about!"
Malfoy rubbed his rabidly bruising cheek and glowered at Harry "you'll pay for that, teach him a lesson, Crabb."
The larger boy cracked his knuckles and advanced on Harry who deftly dodged Crabb's groping hand and swiftly kicked him where it hurts. Crabb collapsed with a high pitched scream. Harry raised an eyebrow at Malfoy "it would seem you have run out of goons princess." Malfoy backed up against the wall and pulled out his wand, Harry just sneered "what are you going to do with that? Poke me in the eye?"
"STUPITFY." A few red sparks fizzled pitifully out of the blond boys wand.
"I don't think that's going to work," Harry snatched the wand out of his hand "now apologize for calling Hermione a mudblood and I will consider being civil to you in the future, or you can end up like your friend over there." Harry jabbed his thumb in Crabb's direction.
Malfoy swallowed hard as though he was drinking one of Snape's concoctions and said "I humbly ask for forgiveness for calling your friend a mudblood."
Harry smiled and helped him get Crabb off the floor before he turned to both boy's and said "now if I ever hear either of you say rude derogatory words to anyone or if I hear that you have I will personally beat you both into a bloody pulp." Crabb snorted "don't think I won't Crabb I may only have one arm but I still took down four muggles each twice your size." Crabb didn't look so cocky now, so what if he was exaggerating slightly Crabb was dumb enough to believe him so was Malfoy by the looks of it too.
After Malfoy and Crabb trudged off to their respective rooms leaving Harry alone he reached for the silver doorknob, when a voice spoke up from behind him, "that was quite a show I have never seen anyone kick someone in the nuts so spectacularly."
Harry whirled around spotting a large figure hidden in the shadows. "Thanks for the compliment, I had a good tutor," Harry smiled to himself at least Dudley was useful for something even if Harry himself learned from being the practice dummy. Harry swiftly blocked out those memories not wanting to storm off to Privet Drive and beat Dudley again.
Harry could sense the figure smirk "so it would seem, I had better introduce myself as it seems we will be sharing a room for the next seven years." the figure stepped out of the shadows "Gregory Goyle at your service."
Harry was nearly shocked speechless he never new Goyle knew how to string more that one word together let alone create a coherent sentence. Harry quickly regained his wits and held out his hand he might as well be friendly he didn't want to be murdered in his sleep. "Harry Potter, nice to meet you." Goyle's large hand grabbed Harry's and shook nearly ripping off Harry's remaining arm, Harry laughed "careful I only have one arm left."
Goyle laughed as he opened the door to their shared dorm bathing them both in bright golden light. It was brightly lit compared to the rest of the Slytherin chambers that were illuminated by crappy green or silver lamps that gave off little light it may have been good for creating a sinister atmosphere but one wouldn't be able read or do homework in it. The room contained two green and silver four poster beds, two desks and a set of book shelves at one end of the room Harry guessed homework was to be done here and the common room was to be used for acting cunning and being Slytherin, far different from Gryffindor which was bright warm and cheery.
Harry sighed he didn't want to think any more all he wanted was to sleep but he had to inform Dobby about changes to the master plan. Wearily Harry pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill and resigned to write Dobby a letter, not noticing Goyle secretly looking over his shoulder. After scratching out many words at last he had something that he hoped wouldn't entice Dobby's wrath. Carefully drying the ink with sand Harry folded the letter and placed it in his pocket to give to Hedwig tomorrow, he didn't trust himself not to get lost in the dungeons trying to find his way back. At long last Harry changed into his fuchsia pyjamas and crawled into bed, he had just closed his eyes when Goyle spoke.
"How long has Malfoy's house elf been living with you?"
Harry groaned why was this happening to him, was all of this happening for those nutty elves sick pleasure. "I have no idea what your talking about."
Goyle snorted "yes you do, you were writing a letter to one Dobby, I know for a fact all house elves have unique names there can only be one Dobby you see and he belonged to the Malfoy's up until a year ago when the elder Malfoy got drunk and gave him a pair of socks."
Harry looked over to the larger boy and asked "and you know this how?"
"My father was with him we were visiting the Malfoy's and I over heard the elf demanding socks so he could go care for little Harry Potter."
Harry groaned, but inwardly grinned it wasn't his fault after all, "so what are you going to do about it?"
"Oh I am going to blackmail you of course it would be un-Slytherin not to, I just have to decide what I want out off all of this, I'll tell you in the morning." with that he rolled over and fell promptly asleep leaving Harry wide awake.
The next morning Harry woke early after Goyle gave off a particularly loud snore, he dressed silently grabbed his book bag and letter and retreated from the Slytherin domain. He walked briskly down the dark chill corridors trying to find his way to the owlery in an unfamiliar route. He got there eventually though Hedwig was angry at being awoken so early to deliver a letter after a long promise of treating her like a queen for all eternity she set off for Surrey where Dobby was likely watching cartoons on Dudley's TV. With that finished Harry meandered down to the great hall following the loud drone of chatter and clash of cutlery on plates.
Harry sneered at the deafening silence that heralded his entrance to the great hall and took a seat next to Goyle at the Slytherin table trying to ignoring the burning sensations of hundreds of eyes glued to his back. Turning to Goyle, who was eating his way through a large pile of scrambled eggs he asked in a low whisper, "so have you decided how to use last nights information then?"
"Of course, follow me I do not wish to be over heard. Oh here's your timetable by the way, and you had better take some toast classes are due to start in fifteen minutes."
Harry followed Goyle out of the Great Hall a stack of toast in one hand, he was outwardly calm but it was only a thin veneer over growing impatience. They entered a empty classroom and Goyle put up a simple silencing ward and waited finally Harry cracked "spill it Goyle we haven't got all day."
Goyle smirked "ah yes where were we," Harry glared causing Goyle's to laugh "impatient are we, you really need to calm down Dobby has rubbed off on you if I remember he was rather excitable."
"Fuck off."
"Ooh, you had better watch your mouth."
"Tell me what you want all ready."
"Alright, I want to be your friend."
Harry looked at Goyle sceptically "Goyle you want to be my friend and you use some of the greatest blackmailing material in the history of blackmail for my friendship?"
"Yes don't blame me I haven't got the greatest genes to draw from, besides you seem like a powerful friend to have a bit an armless one."
Harry glared at Goyle for good measure then shrugged "fine you seem like a powerful friend to have too Goyle, if I hadn't kicked Crabb in the nuts before he grabbed me he would likely have wiped the floor with me, I am out of practice fighting truthfully."
"Sounds good my inner goon rejoices. Call me Greg, there are no surnames between friends." Goyle looked at his pocket watch "classes start in five minutes we have charms with the Hufflepuffs first. Oh before I forget that nurse lady was eyeing you like you were a choice piece of meat when we were in the Great Hall."
Harry shuddered he didn't want to spend any time in the hospital wing if necessary it was so prison like. Not wanting to be late for their first class the ran out the door Harry tossing his uneaten toast into his bag for later as they sped towards the charms corridor. They arrived on time luckily and took a seat on the Hufflepuff side of the room next to Neville and Hermione, who looked askance between Goyle, or Greg as he preferred to be called, and Harry. Whispering that he would tell them later they turned their attention to professor Flitwick and spent a boring two hours taking notes on rudimentary charms theory.
After class when Harry and Goyle were heading off to herbology Hermione grabbed both of them and dragged them into a broom closet where she promptly stunned Goyle. Hands on her hips she asked, "so Harry spill it, things are beginning to get odd around here. First you were sorted into Slytherin, then you suddenly become friends with Goyle."
Harry let out a heavy sigh, it seemed he was doing a lot of that lately, and spoke "about getting into Slytherin, that was entirely unexpected but not unfeasible it wanted to put me in it before but this time I wasn't so adamant and the little bastard took me by surprise. Second I promised Dobby I would write every day and I was writing concerning getting into Slytherin and the positive and negative effects that would have on the master plan, but Greg was looking over my shoulder, and he some how knew Dobby and was there when Dobby was freed by a drunk Malfoy, Dobby said he was off to look after me and he heard and this morning he blackmailed me into becoming my friend and goon, which isn't unwelcome I was accosted by Malfoy and Crabb last night but I slapped him and kicked Crabb in the nuts." Harry took a deep breath and waited for Hermione to respond.
Hermione looked at him askance "you can't be left alone with out causing some disturbance can you? I don't know what it is about you Harry that seems to draw trouble but it does, well I hope Goyle keeps an eye on you, I really don't want to think about what would happen if you were set loose to do what you please."
Harry looked indignant "I would have you know nothing would happen at all, I don't get into trouble, trouble finds me."
"I know Harry but we have no idea what is going to happen now things have been totally changed around, I don't know what those elves did but this is almost getting out of hand. Well you to had better be getting off to class." Hermione flicked her wand at Goyle un-stunning him.
Goyle blinked a few times "alright who stunned me?" Hermione blinked in shock at Goyle speaking in more that just grunts, he turned to Hermione "it was you wasn't it? Clever little witch aren't you Gregory Goyle at your service," He bowed.
Hermione tried not to blush "er Hermione Granger."
Goyle brightened "you must be Harry's best friend, the one whose honour he defended so valiantly last night."
Harry shook his head "Greg cut the crap slapping down Draco Malfoy can hardly be considered valiant, we're going to be late for herbology as it is."
"but you must admit it was a magnificent slapping down."
Harry sighed again and grabbed Goyle and dragged him out of the closet leaving Hermione starring in wonder.
The next few days passed relatively quickly in Harry's mind he had managed to dodged Madame Pomfry thus far and hadn't had any lessons with Snape so far. None of the other Slytherins had tried anything yet though Harry could tell by the look in some of their eyes they were planning to. Things were great pretending to be a dumb first year was easier than expected though some of the Gryffindor's were complete bastards putting a whole new perspective on the Gryffindor Slytherin rivalry, everything was running smooth, that was until today.
It was just before mail arrived in the Great Hall Harry was busy losing an eating contest with Goyle and was completely oblivious to the large brown owl swooping his way, he didn't expect mail today Hedwig was busy returning a letter in reply to Dobby's note which said he should have used his Slytherin cunning to trick the hat into putting him into a less ostracized and suspicious house in accordance to the master plan. Needless to say Harry was quite shocked when said owl dumped an official letter from Gringotts, he was if possible even more shocked when a small grey owl dropped an official letter form the Ministry of Magic, and a nondescript tawny owl dropped a letter from some solicitor.
Gingerly Harry opened the letter from Gringotts first and nearly dropped it in shock.
Dear Mr. Potter
We at Gringotts regret to inform you that all access to the Potter vaults, properties, and investments have been barred to you henceforth due to discrepancies on your part to the code of the Gryffindor blood line of 1034. All vaults, properties, investments made after September 1 are void and will be confiscated. The contents of vault 1766 remain in your possession as does any money drawn from the Potter trust prior to September first.
Sincerely Rangok Head Goblin Gringotts London Branch.
Harry sat stunned for a moment oblivious to everything, at last he picked up the letter from the ministry.
Dear Mr Potter.
It is our deepest regret to inform you that you have been stricken from the line of the noble and proud house of Potter all, moneys, properties, titles are now forfeit as is your use of the name of Potter as of midnight tonight…
Harry stopped reading in shock, what was going on he looked around in a daze before turning to the last letter not noticing the rest of the hall crowding around copies of the daily prophet.
Dear Mr. Potter.
I write to inform you your sorting has had Ministry and Gringotts running around all week everyone was in a panic, and as such I was unable to inform you as I was unable to procure an Owl until three days had passed. I can only offer my deepest apology and hope that this letter reaches you before you hear the news second hand. Only twice before has a member of the Potter line been sorted into Slytherin, both were promptly disowned due to a clause in the magical code of the Gryffindor line written by Godric Gryffindor after his fight and subsequent blood feud with Salazar Slytherin in 1034. It states that any member of the Gryffindor line sorted by his hat into the house of snakes shall forever be branded as a traitor to their blood and all ties shall be severed between the line of Gryffindor and said party. I realise that this must shock you but there is a plus side to all off this as stipulated in the code you are to be hence forth be considered an adult so you no longer have the legal need of a guardian. I hope to schedule a meeting between the two of us as soon as possible though we may have to wait until you are let out this winter as the Headmaster most likely has strings to pull. I wish you the best until then.
Rockgag.
P.S. If it is at all possible set fire to this note it will give the bee something to think about.
Smirking weakly Harry burned the note before he was dragged giggling from the Great Hall by Neville and Hermione before Goyle could stop them.
Hermione looked at Harry worriedly after they had dragged him into a closet "Harry are you all right you look a little shocked."
Harry was overcome with a fresh wave of giggles but managed to choke out "that was the understatement of the century."
Neville meanwhile was holding the letters from the ministry that Harry had dropped whilst he was being dragged spoke up "so Harry what did happen, everyone in the hall was talking but we all know the prophets full of shit, maybe we could help."
Harry laughed mirthlessly for several minutes before he was able to stop, "it seems my getting into Slytherin has caused a few minor things to occur…" that was all he managed to say before he was over come with fresh peels of laughter, not before he handed the remaining letters to Hermione.
Hermione's eyes moved lightning fast over the pages when she was done she turned to Harry her eyes filled with sympathy "oh Harry it will be alright."
Harry abruptly stopped laughing and snarled "I know it will be alright," he lowered his voice "I know it will be all right Dobby will make sure of that, I just can't get over how the poster family of the 'light side' would disown their kids because they get kicks out of being cunning or want more than anything to be someone important, it seems rather hypocritical."
Neville spoke up "everyone has skeletons in their closet."
Hermione nodded "I agree Harry the wizarding world is seriously backwards, I hope it didn't happen to anyone in the past."
Harry clenched his fist "it did twice, Rockgag told me in the letter I burned, he is my friend at Gringotts and will be for the next few years if my money holds up."
Goyle who had been silent throughout spoke "Harry you didn't actually pay the goblin for his services?"
Harry frowned "yeah why?"
Goyle shook his head "Harry, Harry don't you know anything Goblins are chosen, how is a mystery, to serve various accounts they swear an oath of fealty breakable only by life dept till the end of said owner of accounts life, you were swindled my friend,"
"Shit I didn't know that, damn I have a Slytherin goblin working with my money, ironic."
It was Hermione's turn to frown, "Harry you don't have any money."
Harry smirked "yes I do piles of it growing by the minute, I invested in Fred and Georges joke owl order business based in Paris, and Dobby supplied the workers, its huge next year we are hoping to go global if the success in Europe is anything to go by we will be making millions of galleons."
Hermione was scowling "you had better not be forcing house elves into slavery!"
Harry looked affronted "of course not we hire house elves who have been given clothes, I must say they are quite impressionable and have taken to wearing all sorts of strange clothes, it was Dobby's idea to put a TV in the lunch room." Harry shook his head remembering the two elves in pinstripe suits speaking like they were mobsters.
Goyle looked amazed "holy crap you are a share holder in Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, do you know where I can buy some stocks?"
"You would have to ask Fred and George the resident potions apprentices." Goyle's eyes gleamed.
"Harry you really have been busy after all when will it stop," Neville asked in wonder.
Harry looked up "Never probably, this really opened my eyes up wide the wizarding world is totally messed up they let eleven year olds get abandoned because of what house they are picked by a crazy old hat in school, they twiddle their thumbs and let innocent men rot in prison though they have proof they are totally innocent, they send people to prison without a trial, said government is a cesspool of corruption and discrimination, no this wont be over until they are crushed and a better system is put in place, no this won't be over until I we achieve a complete revolution."
Hermione looked as though she wanted to run to the library and start rewriting laws that minute "Harry I am with you," She grabbed his hand and looked at Neville and Goyle.
Goyle looked intrigued "a waste of the greatest blackmail material I think not, of course I'm going to join an revolutionary group run by eleven year olds." He added his hand to the pile.
Neville thought about it for a moment then added "of course I'm in someone will have to keep things sane around here."
"Hey don't forget us!" Two voices said in unison. "You wouldn't leave us out would you?" Fred and George added their hands to the pile. At everyone's shocked looks they add "you really didn't expect us to leave you alone in your time of need did you Harry? We escaped Snape as soon as we saw you need and saw it as a great opportunity to try our new line of spy potions were making for the greasy bat. Annoying bastard, oh before we forget shares are bought at Gringotts ask for Snotsnare unpleasant chap but he knows a lot, mind his hands though Goyley they like wander, thieving bastard... Well we had better be off before Snapey notices us gone and demands our privates for potions ingredients." As soon as they appeared they were gone with a swish of their cloaks leaving behind a stunned audience.
Hermione blinked a few times before she spoke "That was interesting," She looked at her watch. "Oh no, come on Neville we will be late for History of Magic," Hermione grabbed Neville's upper arm and bolted out of the closet leaving Harry and Goyle alone.
Goyle turned to Harry and said "well we had better head to Potions or Professor Snape will be most displeased."
After running at top speed down to the potions classroom, and luckily making it on time, they took seats on the Slytherin side of the room almost jumping when the door slammed marking the arrival of the vaunted potions master.
Speaking barely above a whisper Snape spoke his yearly speech. "You are hear to learn the subtle art of potions making. You will learn to brew glory, bottle luck, and even put a stopper on death, that is if you aren't the usual dunderheads I am forced to teach." Snape glared at the first years causing most to shrink into their seats. He suddenly turned to Harry and Goyle "Potter what would I get if I add powdered essence of ribbed shrew leaf to a base of the essence of murtlap."
Harry blinked a few times trying to remember what potions contained what after blinking a few times he answered "um I think that would be Roodwarts burn cure, professor." He didn't feel like getting a detention so didn't bother to correct Snape about his recent name change.
Snape sneered and shot forward the next question, "When Potter would you pick the petals of moonflowers."
Harry knew that one it had a many special notes made because of its finicky picking times in one thousand magical herbs and fungi "at midnight on a new moon if it was to be used in the wolfs bane potion, at noon during midsummer if it was to be used in most healing potions, but has to be picked at dawn if it is mixed with moonstone… Those are all I can remember there are a bunch more it depends potion by potion."
Snape was seething "What is the difference between Venus's tears and Aphrodite's oils?"
Harry smirked "they are the same substance Sir."
Snape looked as thought he had swallowed something foul "three points to Slytherin Potter for actually opening your book before coming to this class."
Harry was surprised he never thought Snape would ever willingly give him points, but he supposed since he was a member of Slytherin house tipped the balance.
Snape wasn't finished yet it was his personal goal to remove as many points as he reasonably could during the Gryffindor first years first potions class he turned to Ron and hissed "Where Weasley would you find a bezoar?"
Ron paled and stuttered "I d-don't know."
Snape smirked "What would you get Weasley if you added shredded shrivel fig to a base of stewed leaches and lacewing fly's?"
Ron was red in the face with frustration "I don't know Snape why don't you ask Potter he seems to know everything." He glared at Harry.
"Fifteen points from Gryffindor and detention with Filch every night this weekend." Ron looked as though he wanted to protest but someone clamped a hand over his mouth. Snape smirked and waved his wand at the black board and the instructions for a boil cure appeared.
The class went by quickly Harry and Goyle's potion was roughly the right colour and constancy as neither were very good at making any kind of potion, unlike Malfoy whose potion was perfect despite working with Crabb who seemed to be half asleep, the blonde ferret had puffed his chest out and was looking superior, Harry had to resist the urge to slap him again. Class was over and every one was filing out when Snape called his name.
"Potter stay behind I need a word with you."
Harry sighed he was hoping not to get a detention today careful not to look Snape directly in the eye as he wasn't competent in masking his mental shields yet he stared glumly at his shoes while Snape chased off a few spying Slytherins.
Snape cleared his throat but Harry remained staring at the floor "Very well, it is my duty as your head of house to help you resolve any problems that may arise, I am sure you are confused if you ever wish for an ear to listen my office is always open," Snape sounded pained towards the end as though he wished to rip out his tongue and gouge out his eyes.
Harry having no wish to speak with Snape either said "it's ok professor, being disowned and made a legal adult is more a blessing than a curse, though I am shocked that anyone would do that to a kid, I get to leave my relatives now, thanks for the offer though." With that Harry left leaving Snape thoughtful.
Authors Note: Good place to end it I suppose things would have gotten a bit too crazy if I had continued on, the next chapter will hopefully not take as long to put out, I have a good excuse for not writing though if that matters or not. Expect to see the end of Quirille and more character interaction in the next chapter how exciting I can't wait to write it! I love reviews and thank every one who writes them, you people are the best.