A bustling street, happy shoppers laden down with bags full of Christmas presents for their loved ones. Vendors trying to sell their overly large, cheap knocked off Disney toys.
"Get your toys here! Crazy Frog and Eeyore!"
"Big issue ma'am? Sir? Big Issue?"
"Can I talk to you about house insurance?"
All mixed amongst the rabble of gossip and chatter. Everyone happy to be out, everyone full of the joys of Christmas.
A splutter, a whine….
Suddenly a booming voice.
"The woman in red who has just walked out of Bon Marche has dropped a crisp packet in the street…." A heavy sigh. "In the city of Midgar, this is known as littering… such acts of littering are punishable by a 50 Gil fine." He switched off the microphone and placed it back in its holder. "I hate this job… cant we do something else?"
"It's called public service dude… oooh ooh look someone dropped a cigarette butt!" The microphone was thrust into Reno's hands again.
"It disturbs me that you get so excited over that"
"To the man in the black jacket, you have just dropped a cigarette butt in the street… such littering carries a 50 gil fine"
"Hey you missed out half the script!"
"Shut up dude… hey that was Tseng... HEY Tseng YOU DROPPED YOUR CIGGARETTE!"
"Tsk tsk, the boss should know better. He should be setting an example. Especially as he's the one that put us on litter patrol"
"Hee hee hee, look who just walked out of McDonald's"
"Walked? You mean Waddled right?" He adjusted the black ray bans, wrap around frames digging in slightly.
"Yeah good point…" Sniggering he watched as the massively built man waddled down the road, a bursting bag full of Big Macs.
"He dropped a French fry"
"HEY HEIDEGGER YOU DROPPED A FRENCH FRY!" he shouted into the microphone, the speakers squealing. Heidegger jumped, wobbling, dropping the bag of Big Macs over the pavement.
"oh that's gotta be what… 500 gil worth of damage there" the slight grin. "Book him boys" spoken into a walkie talkie that crackled into life with a reply. They watched in amusement as the huge man was slapped with a ticket, the enforcers rather enthusiastic anti-litter campaigners.
"To the old lady who just walked by my window… you have dropped a pair of Mark's and Spencer's white granny pants…. Please remove the rubbish from the pavement and place it in the bin or face a million Gil fine"
"You're supposed to read from the script! And not so loud you just gave the poor dear a heart attack"
"Looks like she might need a change of underwear." He watched the old woman waddle awkwardly.
"EEEW" Rude gagged, "I'm drinking chocolate milkshake!"
"Yo, do you think we could skive this? I mean, we've been sitting here for three hours"
"Someone just dropped something"
"To the tall girl in the black and red Lonsdale jacket… yeah you the one with the scrawny little friend with the robin cat toy… you just dropped a roll of paper, in the city of Midgar this is known as littering… ah sod it"
"Hah hah, she just did the finger to you"
"That little… I should…" he turned to watch the girl and her friend walk past. "Nice ass though"
"The microphone is still on" Rude watched the girl and her friend dissolve into laughter.
"Time to move on" Reno shook his head and slammed the mike back into its holder. Revving the huge van up he groaned as it conked out, the engine making a horrible spluttering noise. "Dammit"
Later that night, they still sat there… bored tones.
"To the bimbo in the purple top, you just threw up on the pavement… this is an act of littering…"