Standard disclaimer applies-
"If I could, I would turn time back to do it all over again, grovelling, begging, utterly repentant and sincere. I would let you have your way. Go China, go home, go freaking America if it means you would have forgiven me instead of leaving me the mess I am today.
"If I could, I would take back what I said and did - harsh words, defensive gestures, hurtful actions and all. I would have taken you into my arms and kissed you senseless before this whole chaos took place, setting aside my stupid pride and actually thinking before I made another stupid mistake that only made you further than ever.
"If I could, I would walk backwards step by step, going back over every wrong move that I made. I would step out to take the blame willingly, for I know it is my fault, and I know that it is my responsibility to correct it.
"If I could, I would.
"But I can't. I can't, I can't, and so I'll settle for regretting."
Chapter 5: Desperation
The intercom came on and a pleasant voice drifted over the human body of people moving about in a mass of confusion.
"Attention. The first bus heading for Tokyo airport is arriving in 5 minutes. All passengers due for that bus please gather your belongings and head over to the ticket counter. Thank you for your cooperation."
Rei heaved a sigh, heading back to his seat. All he had was a black bag, containing the bare essentials he needed before he reached China. His hometown. Where he belonged.
Looking at the almost pathetic assemblage he had, he gave into the urge to draw a deep breath.
It was almost as if he had never joined the Bladebreakers, never went through all those matches with them, never gone through all those killer-training sessions, never spent the best part of his past years with them.
Never met Tyson. Max. Kenny. Kai.
Never fallen in love.
It was as if everything that had happened, had not.
Those great times he had shared with people he had grown so close to. So close, all of them so endeared to one another that they could be considered family.
And even now, when he was on the point of no turning back, he still could not help but wonder if they would miss him. Would his presence, or lack thereof, be missed dearly?
He missed them.
Damn it. Why now?
Why did it have to be now of all times for him to be hit with a fresh wave of sharp nostalgia?
For a second, it made him hesitate.
Was what he was doing correct? How would he be affecting his life...how would he be changing things?
Because, surely, they would act differently around him and treat him differently too. They might even bear some resentment for his sudden departure. It was not everyday that one of your team mates went missing with some of his belongings, without so much as a goodbye.
And it was even rarer that, after this had been done, you could come away walking, talking and acting like nothing has changed in the slightest and everything was fine and dandy. And definitely, without fail, there would be a certain amount of uneasiness in the atmosphere that would make it worse than meeting strangers.
He brushed that thought quickly from his mind. Hesitation was dangerous. It was a feeling, a sense of insecurity that he could not afford. At least not at this point of time.
With that firm resolution in mind, he slung his bag over his shoulder. Biting his bottom lip lightly, he made his way through the overcrowded terminal to the ticket counter.
His footsteps slowing to a halt behind a guy in a black cloak, he got in line, releasing his grip on his lip and licking it gently.
Well, here he was.
Kai used his left thumb to lift the flap up slowly, cautiously.
His hand was trembling.
Tentatively, he inched a folded up piece of paper out of the envelope, taking care not to crease it. The side he was holding up had no writing on it. But faintly, barely, he could discern the protruding imprint of the words from the other side of it.
His heart began palpitating much faster. God, he had never felt such nervousness in his entire life. How was it that a letter, that would quite plausibly crush his morale, written by someone he was trying very hard to forget and hold back from, could hold so much more calculated anxiety and create an intensified sense of nervousness inside of him, as compared to say, his grandfather?
He unfolded it once.
Twice.
Thrice.
And flipped it open.
The words were written in black ink, contrasting and standing out distinctly from the whiteness of the A4 paper.
The manuscript was just like the one on the envelope.
Unmistakably Rei's handwriting.
His left hand ghosted over the page gently, revelling in the acute impression left by the words.
His vision was unfocused, gaze not concentrating on the actual words, so much so that the words seem to blur and merge together, forming a messy mass of black.
He didn't want to read it. He didn't want to find out what Rei had been thinking. He didn't want to know what Rei wanted to tell him. There was too much pain, too much hurt between them. Too much to take a simple letter to make it all right again.
He didn't want to read it.
And yet, the curiosity was rising rapidly, as was the faint notion that getting him back was not completely out of point.
So decided, he focused upon the words that were staring back at him.
The bus came to a grinding halt in front of the waiting line of people. Rei glanced up at it.
The exhaust gave one last tired rumble and emitted a puff of grey looking cloud of smoke before falling silent.
The automatic doors in the front folded in and slid to one side. Five men in blue jumped down the steps, arranging themselves quickly into an orderly line.
The nearest one to the bus unlatched the side of the bus and flipped open to reveal a large compartment. The one furthest from the bus and closest to the people picked up the luggage in front of him as if it were effortless, before passing it swiftly to the next person.
Rei watched the assembly line in mute fascination. The five men worked with such enthralling efficiency. Or maybe he was just extremely bored.
As if in a trance, he moved forward a step when the person in front of him did.
Luggage was taken, and more people moved to get into the bus.
Rei was one step closer every few seconds.
The words seemed to leap up at him.
What was he supposed to do now?
Memories from the past few days, weeks, months, years, came rushing back to him. It was overwhelming.
Rei laughing after having hit him up the head with a snowball. Rei's closed eyes and contended smile on his visage as he sipped his hot cocoa. Rei grinning as he fooled around with Tyson and Max. Purring as he stretched when he woke up, or as he relaxed from a tough day of training, or when Kai was massaging him
Rei battling Bryan, braid askew, a look of fierce determination on his countenance. Rei lying on the white sheets of the hospital bed – tired, fatigued, but beaming proudly up at him. Rei pouting. Cooking dinner. Laughing. Smiling. Frowning. Hissing.
But those words that had sprouted from Rei's mouth - he had used them like a weapon, throwing and lashing out. And it hurt like one would too.
"I hate you."There had been so much venom in his voice.
Just before Kai turned, Bryan stood up and caught his elbow in a firm grip.
"Hurt him, I'll hurt you." The look in his eyes was all the explanation that Kai needed.
Rei hated him. Right?
Thoughts and memories of Rei revolved around his head like a blizzard.
Faster and faster. One thought chasing after the next. Confusing, so confusing.
But through all the uncertainty, through all the memories and images going around, his name stood out with crystal clarity.
Shit yeah. He needed to do something.
Grabbing his car keys and coat, he took long quick strides out of the door. Behind him, forgotten, a piece of slightly crumpled paper fluttered slowly to the ground, twisting and turning slightly in mid air before coming to rest peacefully just on top of an envelope.
- + -
The low rumble of the engine, the yells of the workers, mothers calling out for playful children who had strayed a little too far for safety, the indignant wailing of babies and the general murmur of the crowd mingled together – so much so that Rei could not differentiate one sound from the next, and the whole scene seem to fade into the background altogether.
His thoughts became the main focus of his attention. Last minute regret? Definitely not.
He had come so far that he was certain there was no way that he was turning back.
There was no one waiting for him to do so, anyway.
- + -
Kai strode out of the door, the sound of his rapid footsteps hitting the mahogany underfoot, catching Tyson's attention. Max and Kenny were no where to be found.
"Hey Kai."
There was no response.
"Kai! Wait up man. What's the -"
Tyson's tirade was cut off abruptly by the rude slamming of the door. Pulling a face at the unyielding piece of wood, he headed to Kai's room. Peeking in, he spotted a white piece of paper nestled contently in the middle of the floor. Inquisitiveness piped, he moved forward and picked it up. And felt his breath catching half way up his throat.
It was a letter from Rei to Kai, and it was so weird it seemed surreal.
Tyson's eyes flicked back to the first word again, and he skimmed through the letter once more.
Kai,
There's not much I want to say. But there is something...something important. I'm heading for my hometown in China. Catching the first plane there.
You're probably reading this and wondering what the hell I'm trying to say. I've never had a way with words. Don't worry, I won't take too much of your precious time.
The thing is, one of the greatest mistakes in my life was falling for you.
And the greatest? After all that's happened, I'm still in love with you.
Rei
Tyson smoothed out the letter gently and place it on the table beside Kai's bed, all the while smiling happily to himself. Finally Kai was doing something.
He definitely was not as heartless as he made himself out to be.
Because buried deep within the icy exteriors of seemingly impenetrable barriers, there was a small part of him that lived for someone with than himself. Someone that he held extremely dear. Who he cared for more than an acquaintance.
- + -
Kai took the stairs four at a time, all the while cursing.
The whole damn world was against him today.
First, the stupid lift took so long to arrive that he decided to take the stairs instead. And then there was an old woman who literally hobbled at one step per minute, taking up the entire staircase and effectively blocking his way.
The old woman shifted a little to the left. Kai caught the miniscule action and literally leapt at the opportunity, roughing past the old woman, who managed to utter a squawk and jab his back with her walking stick. Once again claiming the stairs at four at one go, Kai flew down.
- + -
The line was moving faster the nearer he came to the front. The workers were working faster too, rushing to meet the deadline.
Luggage after luggage was passed swiftly from hand to hand, the workers soon falling into a steady rhythm well known to them.
Passenger after passenger had their luggage taken from them, before stepping forward into the bus, glancing around for a vacant seat before heading there.
Standard procedure.
Some kids were still oblivious to their parents' calls, happily playing with themselves, screeching animatedly at the top of their voices and dashing around the place.
Rei chuckled softly to himself as he observed the hyperactive children tearing around much to the distress of their frustrated parents. They reminded him so much of Max and Tyson.
And the parents?
- + -
Kai thrust his car key into the key hold while attempting to twist it violently at the same time, and ended up using such force that the key snapped. He cursed his miserable luck and flung the useless half of the key onto the ground.
What was he supposed to do now? Something close to mild panic rose in his chest, drawing it tight. Whipping around him in his desperation, he spotted a wayward piece of wire.
He grabbed the still sticking out key from the key hold and tossed it away before inserting the piece of wire into it, almost laughing to himself. He never thought he would see the day he had to break into his own car.
-
Kai leapt up, anxiety immediately turning into anger.
"What the hell do you think you were doing at Mariah's house? Do you even know what the time is now? Do you - "
He was cut off by Rei. "What is your problem Kai?"
"What is my problem? What did you do at Mariah's house?"
"We watched a video-"
Kai snorted in disbelief.
"Sure. Whatever."
Rei shook his head disgustedly.
"Why ask when you don't even care? When you don't even listen?"
He stormed to his room and slammed the door behind him, causing the white plaster walls to shake from the force of it.
Kai stared after the door of Rei's room, stunned.
-
Kai...there's not much I want to say.
-
Hearing the melodic click of metal on metal, Kai flung the car door open, wired his car and stepped on the gas pedal, screeching precariously on two wheels out of the car park.
- + -
It was finally Rei's turn to board the bus. Luggage was taken from him before he could say anything, and he felt his own legs move forward one step at a time.
However, he stopped at the second step up the bus. Was he hoping that someone was coming to get him? Or did he just want to take in one last sight of this foreign country that had been his home for the past few years before he headed back to China?
It may have been either one, for Rei did not know himself.
But what he did know was that, try as he might, he could not help scan the crowd anxiously, searching for a navy blue cap, an eye-catching yellow shirt, or a loose tie, who's owner had hair in his eyes, or a white scarf hanging out almost regally behind a confident figure.
"Hey boy...move it will ya...We ain't got all day." A harsh voice cut into his thoughts. The queue was glaring at him and some were tapping their feet impatiently, and he looked around once more, feeling a deep sinking in the pits of his stomach. There was no one there.
- + -
Kai raced onto the streets. He had to get to the bus station before the bus took off for the airport.
Swerving this way and that, he barely missed the other cars. Car horns were blasted from behind him, all of which he ignored. There was one thing on his mind now, and only that was of importance.
The lanes and vehicles flashed past, he leaving them in the dust as soon as they came into view.
Then suddenly, he slammed down on his brakes. The cars in front of him were not moving at all. They were at a standstill. He could not believe it. Of all the times to get stuck in a blasted traffic jam.
-
He swung around and came face to face with Rei. They were but centimetres apart, and Rei's amber orbs were filled with fear, surprise and...trepidation?
It had been so long that he had seen Rei face to face like that. True, they lived in the same house, but Rei was very highly skilled at dodging him. But now...now...Rei was practically nose to nose with him, staring him in the face.
Fate had thrown him a chance and he was not going to waste this one.
"Rei, I -" Kai began, reaching out to grab Rei's hand, intent to make him listen to what he had to say.
Something in Rei's eyes hardened, disgust taking over. With a feral growl, Rei slapped Kai's hand away before it touched him.
The force of the slap was hard enough to stop Kai from another attempt, but not hard enough to actually cause him pain.
He brushed past Kai, and with 3 seconds, was out of sight, the last strand of his ponytail disappearing round the corner. Kai bit his lip and closed his eyes tightly.
-
But there is something...something important.
-
Drumming his fingers impatiently on the steering wheel, Kai frowned and concentrated on not swearing or slamming his fist into the dashboard in pent up frustration.
A motorcycle pulled up beside him, engine rearing so loudly that he found inself turning to glance at the owner. Piercing blue eyes, under flaming red hair, stared at him, gaze holding a hint of humour.
"Tala?" Kai asked in disbelief.
Tala grinned.
"We got a call from Tyson, roughly sketching out the contents of a certain love letter..."
Kai's cheeks burned. "It's not a love letter." He mumbled, knowing that Tala didn't give a damn.
"And that doesn't explain why you're here."
"C'mon Kai...do you think Bryan would have just let his precious Rei-rei off without, and I quote, 'attaining true happiness'? He practically held me at knife-point and threatened to kill me if I did not help you get out of this traffic jam. We do listen to traffic news you know."
"Bryan said 'attaining true happiness'?" Kai asked, incredulous.
Tala cracked up with laughter.
"Are you out of your mind? Duh, no. It was the little shrimp."
"Ian?"
"How many other little shrimps do you know?"
"I see."
"So are you just going to continue brooding in your car or are you going to exchange vehicles with me so that you could catch Bryan's precious Rei-rei and save my life?"
"Why isn't Bryan here then?"
"He would have created a scene. I forbade him to. I still have power as a captain."
Kai flashed Tala a grin, the first one in who knew how long, and got out of his car.
Soon, he was on the motorbike and speeding off to the front of the jam.
Tala sighed to himself.
"Why do I always have to play the hero?"
- + -
All the passengers were on the bus, and the driver was already on his seat. The engine was ignited, and it nrumbled.
Then all of a sudden, it spluttered weakly before dying away again. Cursing, the driver went down the stairs and yelled for the mechanic.
Both of them glanced at each other, went to the back of the bus, to the front, all the while talking in hushed tones.
Aboard the bus again, the driver said in an apologetic tone, "Due to a difficulty that we didn't count on, the bus would have to be delayed for ten minutes. We apologise for the inconvenience caused."
Kai manoeuvred the motorbike, weaving his way in and out of the treacherous close propinquity of the cars.
It was as if there were no red lights and no other impediments on the roads. It was as if he was the only one on the wide expense, trying to get from one place to another as fast as the engine would allow.
The trees and flowers at the side of the road flashed past, blurring together to form a mere colourful shape that made no sense whatsoever.
But as he was about to increase his speed, he heard the distant but unmistakable wailing of a traffic police car. Cursing to himself, he pulled over, knowing that he would never he be able to beat them. He wanted to get it over with as fast as possible.
-
Kai stepped into the living room, stealing a glance at Rei. At that same moment, Rei glanced up from his conversation with Max, a smile on his lips. His eyes met Kai's. The smile disappeared at once.
Fiery crimson iris stared back at him. The mere ferocity and intensity of that look made him keep on staring. He couldn't break away, not even if he tried.
And he wasn't trying.
Their eyes locked together, and Kai's feet came to an abrupt halt on their own accord. They were trapping each other with their gaze without meaning to. But that didn't mean they didn't want to.
-
I'm heading for my hometown in China. Catching the first plane there.
-
"Yes officer, I'll never do it again sir."
Anything for the stupid guy to leave him the hell alone.
"Thank you."
For the life of him, he did not know what the police man had been saying.
Driving slowly and cautiously, like the way he was supposed to, Kai waited till he had turned a corner and he was well out of sight. Then, he went full speed, faster than what he was pulling off before he had been pulled over.
"Sucker."
- + -
Rei was staring aimlessly out of the window, looking at nothing in particular. He was bored, and bored was never good.
It made him dredge up events that he did not particularly want to recollect. It recreated the melancholy feeling of uncertainty and second thoughts, something he did not particularly care for.
As if on their own, his fingers flipped open his wallet and between the folds of notes and receipts, he brought out a photograph almost long forgotten.
It was a colour photograph, and it was of the Bladebreakers. It had been Kai's birthday and they had celebrated it, regardless of Kai's vehement protests that he did not need a birthday celebration – that was for kids, and threats to double their training programme.
-
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR. SOURPUSS!"
"Say that one more time Tyson, and your head will roll."
"Lighten up Kai! It is your birthday after all. Can't you, just for one day, be a nice guy?"
"No."
"Somehow, I expected this answer."
"Hey guys, the cake is here." Max had called out, almost nervously, to break up an almost certain impending melee between a fuming Kai and an insulted Tyson.
That took Tyson's concentration.
"Yeah! The cake! My favourite part of the birthday." Tyson cheered.
"Make a wish Kai!" Max had stated, practically bouncing up and down with barely contained excitement.
"No."
"C'mon Kai! Don't be such a big baby. Just make a wish."
"No."
"Just make it so that Tyson would get his cake and shut up." Rei had said silently into Kai's ears.
Kai had glanced up at him and smirked.
"That's right. Then at least we would all get some peace and quiet."
"WHAT! What did you say to him Rei?" Tyson demanded.
"Shh Tyson. You wanted me to make a wish? Well, I need silence to do it."
Everyone fell silent as Kai bowed his head.
After a brief moment, Kai glanced up. He caught Rei's eye and grinned. Rei felt himself returning it.
-
Rei smoothed out the worn edges, faint fingerprints overlying one another proof of the numerous times that he had taken out the picture, and the noticeable creases evidence of the countless times it had been folded up again.
"That your boyfriend?" A voice to his left broke him out of his mindless reverie.
He had not realised that he had been tracing out an imaginary circle around Kai's face, almost as if caressing him.
He glanced up at the stranger, stunned that someone could be so open and straightforward. After all, many people did not take homosexuality too well. He wasn't going to give anything away, but then, he figured, why not? After all, he was leaving this place and never coming back, right? He might as well talk to this stranger. Besides, the stranger had a sympathetic voice. Maybe he could provide some commiseration that would take his mind off memories.
"I wish." He answered, a bitter tone that he had not expected lacing his answer.
The stranger was silent for so long that Rei was almost certain he had left.
"You're running away?"
Rei almost jumped.
How could this stranger read so much off him?
"Not running away, just...I just need some time to think, sort some things out."
"Running doesn't solve anything you know?" The stranger was relentless.
"I'm not running away." Rei reiterated, irritation entering his voice.
The stranger shrugged.
"Sure, whatever you say." But it was obvious that he was not convinced.
"Running doesn't solve anything, whatever the case may be." The stranger repeated in that same slightly chiding tone of his.
"I know." Rei said.
Then, softer, almost a whisper, "I know."
The bus started up then, and the stranger returned to his seat, leaving Rei to his thoughts.
- + -
Kai was reaching the bus station soon, cursing some more as if he could feel Rei slipping right through his fingers.
-
"You were drunk. And you wanted to drink more. It wasn't good for your health."
"Why do you give a damn Kai? Why do you give a fucking damn anyway?" Rei's eyes were but slits now.
"Because-"
Rei cut across him.
"Why don't you let me drown my sorrows in alcohol?"
He shook his head, disgust etched clearly on his face.
"Forget it." He spat.
He spun around and was about to head to his room when Kai grabbed his right arm, halting him in his tracks.
He turned around to face Kai again. Kai looked like a tormented soul. He looked hurt. Betrayed. Confused. But above all, wounded.
And when he spoke, his voice was low and dangerous, mixed with a hint of melancholy.
"What sorrows?"
Rei wrenched his arm from Kai. Did Kai not know? Did he really not understand?
Or was he just playing with him.
"I hate you." Each word was hissed out, and laced with pure unadulterated anger.
-
You're probably reading this and wondering what the hell I'm trying to say. I've never had a way with words. Don't worry, I won't take too much of your precious time.
-
He was so close now. So close.
The bus rumbled and this time, did not break down. It started off, and began moving along the road.
Rei couldn't help but risk a last glance back as the bus pulled out of the parking space. When he saw nothing but the almost endless asphalt road behind him and felt a sinking in his stomach, he chided himself.
What had he been expecting? The entire Bladebreakers running after the bus? Yeah, right. But Kai should have gotten his letter by now, right?
'So what?' a small voice in his head said.
So what indeed.
Kai's lack of presence must mean that he didn't care.
And for some reason, that hurt worse than physical pain. Hurt more than the slap.
-
Kai was in his room, rubbing the sides of his head with circular motions, a pained expression on his countenance.
Rei smiled to himself. It was amazing how Kai Hiwatari, the invincible Kai Hiwatari, could be defeated and reduced to carrying around a bottle of aspirin by a boisterous energetic Japanese named Tyson.
And on his birthday too.
Walking over to his bag, he took out his gift for Kai.
"Happy birthday Kai." He said quietly, not wishing to surprise his captain and give him a heart attack.
Kai opened his eyes and gave Rei a wan smile.
"Thank you."
Almost shyly, Rei thrust the package into Kai's folded lap. "I got this for you. Hope you like it."
Kai's eyes widened almost imperceptibly. "You shouldn't -" he started. But as he glanced up into Rei's wide open gaze, he knew that 'no' was out of the question.
Fingering the scotch tape, Kai smoothed out the wrapping paper and unfolded the present. Inside, resting neatly among the paper, was a headband with the Ying-Yang symbol, an exact replica of the one Rei had. His actions slow, Kai reached out and ghosted his hand over the headband. It was pure silk and felt extremely comfortable underneath.
"It's not much." Rei stated nervously. He couldn't tell by Kai's actions whether he liked it or not.
"I couldn't find anything, so -"
"It's brilliant. Thank you." Kai glanced up again, the sincerity of his gratefulness stunning Rei and making him feel awkward.
"-sort of like a remembrance. So that you'll remember you'd ever had a team mate by the name of Rei Kon who liked to wear headbands with the Ying-Yang symbol." Rei grinned.
"Baka," Kai said fondly, "I don't need a headband to remember you. But-"
Kai shifted the headband out of Rei's reach as Rei leaned across to get it. "But you're not getting this back. It's mine now, right?"
Rei grinned at him, and before long, both of them had burst out laughing.
-
Rei smiled serenely.
Running doesn't solve anything. He knew that.
But the memories were better; sweeter. Shouldn't that count for something?
- + -
Kai picked up speed, tires screeching as they mounted a corner and leaving a cloud of dust and sand behind him. He was nearing the bus station.
As he skidded around the last corner to the station, in the distance, he spotted a large bus making its way along the road away from him, rumbling as it went along. Was that the bus Rei was in? Was he too late?
Desperation as thick as sand clogged his throat, making it difficult for him to swallow. Cussing, he leaned forward, mentally willing his bike to go faster. A large screaming yellow sign loomed up ahead of him, seemingly out of nowhere. It was as though with Rei on his mind, he became impervious to everything else.
Who in bloody hell placed the idiotic sign there? Did he or she not think beforehand that it might, oh I don't know, obstruct people or something? One might think that the person would want to deliberately block someone's way; one would think that the person actually intended to prevent anyone from crossing there with a vehi-...oh... Oh.
Kai leaped off his bike and moved closer to the sign to confirm his speculations. In block letters printed boldly in black, the sign read 'NO ENTRY FOR VEHICLES'.
Ah.
-
"My command is law." He grounded out through tightly clenched teeth.
"You think you're so great Kai Hiwatari! Well, you're not!"
Kai gripped the sides of his armchair so tightly that his knuckles turned white, sinking his nails into the soft cushion.
But Rei was on a toll and he was not stopping. He did not notice Kai's pained expression.
"Always bulling us around. What right do you have?"
Getting no reply only served to infuriate Rei even more.
His voice increased till he was practically yelling at the top of his voice.
"Do you even care? Are you even listening? What right do you have to control my life? What right exactly?"
Kai could not stand it any longer. It was grating on him.
He was out of his seat in one swift moment and throwing all his strength into his right palm, slapped Rei so hard that Rei was thrown across the floor, knocking him against the wall.
-
The thing is, one of the greatest mistakes in my life was falling for you.
-
"That bus that just went, where's it heading?" Kai was out of breath.
The lady looked up, shocked that anyone could be so curt.
"That bus is heading for the local airport sir." She responded as politely as she could. The teenager had a tough look to him and he was currently sporting a frustrated expression.
"Did you see a Chinese teenager getting on it? Long black hair, braided to his shins. Amber eyes."
She certainly remembered. The girls had been talking about him, whispering behind their hands and giggling flirtatiously. They had been trying to get his attention the entire time he had been here, talking about how handsome and cute he was. She winced. The poor boy.
"As a matter of fact, I did."
The teen cursed in what she suspected was Russian, in a way that made the lady wince and wish she had not heard it. Then, without a proper thank you or even a semblance of acknowledgement, he was gone, sprinting away into the distance towards his bike.
The lady shook her head. Youngsters these days.
Kai geared up his bike till the rumbling was almost unbearable before letting go of the gears and roaring away to the road. He was losing time, fast. Damn the bloody bus. Damn everything.
If the situation wasn't so serious and if Kai had been thinking straight, he would have been laughing at himself.
Here he was, the great invincible Kai Hiwatari.
It was amazing. Amazing how one single person could do this to him. Amazing how one Chinese teenager could make his heart race and made him even more nervous than before a major beyblading match. It was amazing how he was chasing after that same person, ready and willing to bare his soul of the first time ever, desperate to get him back and apologise. Amazing how he, Kai Hiwatari, was prepared to admit that he was wrong, and ask for forgiveness.
-
Kai ran into the airport, the blast of cold air from the air conditioner blowing against his skin, almost coming as a shock. Scanning the crowd, he could see nothing trademark of Rei. He paused for a moment to gain his bearings, his breath coming in gulps and tearing at his throat. People walking by who were not too engrossed in their own matters paused a second to glance queerly at the teenager who looked so determined and purposeful, yet at the same time so lost – his hair windblown and in disarray. Some of them recognized him as the team captain of the great Beyblading team, some didn't. Kai didn't care. He had been past caring long ago. Dignity might as well have been flung out of the window.
It was in the middle of the holidays, yet not that close to Christmas: the perfect opportune moment to fly overseas for a long holiday. The bloody airport was freaking crowded.
In the distance, he could hear the murmur of voices, excited shouts of children, the polite titter of office attendants and the faint metallic 'beep' of machines. It all sounded so far away, so foreign. He blocked everything from his sight and mind, intent only on his task of searching for Rei. Then, he spotted a mass of long black hair. Eyes lighting up, he ran towards that person, banging into several people in his haste. Not even bothering to look behind him despite the muttered threats and the some not so discreet threats. The hands of a clock could not be turned back.
This was his last chance.
Out of the blur, an airport attendant pushing a row of trolleys leisurely crossed his path, rendering him incapable of crossing. An impeccably dressed businessman pushed a mountain of luggage stacked on his trolley right across Kai's vision. When the long line of trolleys and the businessman had finally gone by, the long haired person was out of sight.
Kai shook his head, almost unable to believe his rotten luck. Making his way to the signboard where the flight and their times were placed up on as fast as he could, he noted that the flight to China was due in five minutes and passengers were to board at gate 32.
Kai pushed forward, and swung around the enclosed section. His eyes darted from object to object, anxious not to spend too much time on an entity, lest he was careless; yet afraid to overlook Rei. But it was getting more and more difficult to spot anyone. The faces and shapes of human forms merged together, till they became blobs and blurs of various colours.
A long long braid of hair the deepest ebony falling to shins. Rei? The outfit was different, but Rei had not taken all his clothes when he had ran away, right?
Kai walked across with long purposeful steps and grabbed the person by the elbow, tugging the person around effectively. "Rei."
It wasn't Rei. It was a girl. Kai stumbled back, surprised.
"Sorry." He hastened, not looking back to see if the girl was laughing at him. Where the hell was Rei? The sense of urgency that had been building up from what seemed like forever was coming full blast now, edging him near panic.
Then, he saw a flash of amber and black out of the corner of his eye. Whipping around, he finally caught sight of Rei. For a nanosecond, he almost could not believe it himself. Not after the long tiring day of many failed attempts and having everything against him. But when he saw the uniquely Rei smile that he was giving the customs officer, he recognised it at once, biting his lip to stop the wave of wistfulness.
And Rei was boarding the plane already. All that separated them was a piece of transparent glass.
"Rei!" he called out, getting the attention of passer-bys, but not Rei himself. Apparently, the glass was pretty good at muffling sound.
He made a move to get to Rei, only to be held back by two burly hands around his middle. Strange, how he had not noticed them before. Not noticed that he had to, obviously, get pass them to get to the segmented section of the airport where Rei was.
"Sorry kid. No one goes there without a boarding pass. Got yours?" the voice was condescending, seeing as Kai had nothing with him.
Kai bit back a scathing remark at the tip of his tongue. It was just wasting time and energy. He made another effort to get pass the guards, but they were too strong for him. Anger and desperation raged inside of him, and he hissed out in barely controlled rage. This hoard of imbeciles did not understand anything.
Seeing Rei getting further away, he cried out once more, "Rei!" This time more desperately. If he had been thinking logically, he would have yanked back from the two men, and than fake a right, effectively passing them. But he wasn't, seeing as the only thing on his mind was Rei, and how to get him back before it was too late. He could only struggle in vain against the tenacious grip the security guards had on him. Slowly, he could sense the tenuous link that he had with Rei break, feel Rei slipping through his fingers like liquid.
Rei disappeared into the passageway linking the airport to the side of the plane. Kai stopped resisting, crumpling almost limply in the grip he was held in.
-
And the greatest? After all that's happened, I'm still in love with you.
-
He did not want to believe it.
He could not be gone. Not now. Not when Kai was sorry he was wrong. Not when he realised just how much Rei meant to him. He needed Rei, damn it! No one understood just how badly.
As if in a daze, he pulled back from the now lax grip, his eyes wide with disbelief and refusal of acceptance, shaking his head slowly, almost as though doing that a repeated number of times could bring Rei back. Almost as if that could change everything.
He took step after step slowly, moving away from the guards, away from Rei.
There were two types of people.
The first kind was the type who gave in easily to pressure, sinking into depression without a fight and wallowed in self pity. They knew no resistance, soon fading away into nothing, leaving but an empty shell of a human body.
The second kind was the type who persevered under exorbitantly harsh conditions, proving others wrong; the kind with a fighting spirit that never waned. But even those people had a certain limit, a certain breaking point. They rarely hit that limit, sure, but that made it all the more worse when they did. And when desperation hit, they hit back.
Kai was the second kind.
Losing Rei was his limit; his breaking point. He swung around wildly, dignity long gone, the burning pain in his chest growing so fast and so painful that it was overwhelming him. The next second, he lit out of the airport, legs hitting the ground at a scary pace, that unknown feeling pushing him and making him feel as though he could go on like this forever.
And as he ran with no idea of where he was heading, his eyes smarting from the pressure of the wind he was going against.
Or maybe, it was the tears that trickled down, unnoticed, by the owner.
-
End Chapter Five