Title: Harry Potter and the Ancient God King

Author: Nopporn Wongrassamee aka The Evil Author

Part 5 – Knowing nothing

"So, what do we really know about Professor Burkle?" Hermione asked.

"She's a better teacher than Umbridge," Ron offered.

"Ron, Quirrel was a better teacher than Umbridge," Harry replied. "And he had Voldemort" Ron flinched, "riding around in the back of his head."

"Um, well she hasn't tried to kill one if us yet," Ron suggested. "That puts her ahead of Quirrel and the fake Moody."

"Unless you count that test," Harry pointed out. "In which case she's already massacred the lot of us."

"But she didn't really..."

"Harry! Ron!" Hermione interrupted. "Can we get back on topic?"

"Right. Sure." Ron hesitated. "What were we doing again?"

"Trying to figure out what Professor Burkle is," Hermione told him.

"Well, she's a witch," Ron said. "Isn't she?"

"I dunno," Harry said thoughtfully. "She doesn't cast spells like anyone else. I've never heard her speak her spells."

"Harry," Hermione said, clutching a hand to her chest, "I of all people know that a wizard doesn't actually need to speak to cast a spell."

"Oh, right. Sorry."

"Well, she really can't be that bad, can she?" Ron asked. "I mean, what are the chances that Dumbledore would hire someone dangerous to us?"

"Quirrel," Harry pointed out.

"Lockhart," Hermione added.

"Fake Moody."

"So, that's four out of five?"

"Umbridge doesn't count. The Ministry foisted her on Dumbledore," Ron pointed out. "But I see your point."

"Y'know, if you count that one time Lupin going werewolf in front of us..." Harry began thoughtfully.

"Guys! Topic!" Hermione interrupted. "Professor Burkle. Remember?"

"Right, Professor Burkle," Ron said quickly. "Where were we?"

"Dangerous or not dangerous?" Harry said after some thought.

"I think we've determined that she's probably dangerous," Hermione said.

"Y'know," Ron said, a rare look of thoughtfulness creeping over his features, "being dangerous probably makes her a better DADA teacher..."

"Ron!" Hermione said, exasperated. "Topic!"

"Sorry." Ron brightened. "Oh, I know! A witch. Is she or isn't she?"

"She has a wand," Hermione pointed out.

"But she just got it," Harry said slowly. "She told me. Professor Burkle got her first wand right before coming to Hogwarts this year."

"How can she do magic so well if she just got a wand?" Hermione asked.

Harry shrugged. "She said she's been doing magic since forever." He frowned, trying to remember the exact wording of the conversation.

"So, Professor's Burkle some kind of magical creature?" Hermione guessed. "It makes sense, but there's laws against nonhumans using wands."

"Right, Hermione," Ron replied sarcastically. "And we all know everyone never breaks the law, right?"

"Well, when you put it that way..."

"I know!" Ron said suddenly. "Professor Burkle's a house elf!"

"Does she look like a house elf?" Hermione asked pointedly.

"Well, when you put it that way..."

"Old." Harry said suddenly.

"What?"

"Professor Burkle said that she was old," Harry explained. "Older than our species. She also said something about once having enough magic to shape worlds."

Ron and Hermione both stared at Harry for a long moment.

"Harry, mate," Ron finally said. "I think she was having you on."

"Yeah, Harry," Hermione agreed. "I think Professor Burkle was just messing with your head. I really don't think that she's some kind of god."