Ok, this chappie is a bit short, and rudey dudey. Its sort of a tie in with a bunch of junk. Im sorry if you don't like it. Don't read it then! Please review if you do like it? There are a few quotes I stole, because I am a lazy arse. As I said, don't like it? Don't read it...wow...Im coming off really bitching.

Chapter twelve: A breath of relief

Jack went bursting into the room, to find Katerina on the floor, hugging her stomach, and gently rocking back and forward.

"Its gone," She said through gritted teeth, and he noticed she was sweating. "I was asleep, and was woken up by a pain in my stomach like I needed to use the pot. My stomach just did a flop and it all came out. Hardly any blood. I think it was dead." Jack knelt down beside the shaking woman, glad they did go to the midwife for a potion.

They had been in Portsmouth two nights now, the Pearl in safe anchorage due to some false documents Jack had drawn up by a magistrate who owed him a favor. Jack and Will found a nice in for the senior crew, and gave Katerina a room for herself. At midday she knocked ever so gently on Jack's door, and said quietly that it was probably best if she aborted the pregnancy. Heaving an almost breath of relief, Jack and Will went out to one of the bath houses to find a decent midwife who could make the necessary potion needed. They came back, and in a swift move Katerina swallowed the whole thing; and they waited. After two hours she finally declared that she wanted to sleep, because nothing was happening.

Then Jack began to worry. What if the baby was holding on to Katerina? Or what if in dying, the little fetus took the girl with it? He was rather fond of the girl, or the fact that she was the sole heiress to the whole Hawkins legacy. Either way, it would be a poor day in Jack's book if she died in this pregnancy. He had felt a twinge when he noticed during the rough voyage over her being in pain. She was not her usual self, like before. She had been drawn, distant and waspish. Jack was now hoping that when this was all said and done, everything would return to normal.

They waited. It was two days later, at twilight when he heard the small cry from Katerina's room. They were right next door to each other, and all day he had been on tenterhooks, not daring to breathe. He was both looking forward and dreading what would happen.

Now, he gently grabbed up Katerina and held her like a small child. She was trembling, and she was very light. Through the soft cotton under-shift he took the liberty of buying of himself, Jack could now see her small belly, flat once again. Her eyes were closed as he stood up and carried her to the twin bed in the middle of the room.

Jack placed her down and pulled the thick down blankets up and over her shoulders. He turned to leave, but saw the damp spot on her pillow, where her head lay. She was silently crying.

"Love?" Jack said carefully, not sure if she was even awake.

"I'm going to Hell," Katerina whispered, burrowing her face in the thick pillows, her shoulders strained against the emotion she rarely showed.

"But you said it yourself, Kat...you said it was probably already dead. If you hadn't gotten it out when you did, it could have made you sick, or kill you."

"I wish my bloody guilt wouldn't plague me!" She cried, shooting up so fast that it startled Jack. Her deep blue eyes were wide, and her thick brown hair was a messy halo framing her face.

"What?"

"Well...its just that...I used Matthew, who only ever loved me. I played on that just so I could get my shop. My rightful shop. I made his life miserable! Constantly nagging and lying, and he knew it too! Then he died, saying he loved me, with my name on his lips. And what did I do? I went over to the chest of drawers and looked to see if there really was a map."

"Well, you are a pirate..." Jack stuttered, not used to women blatantly throwing out there wrongs. He sat down at the foot of the bed, and frowned over at her. Katerina was now sitting cross legged, still shaking(he could feel it through the bed) but looking defiant and very much a confused child.

"Im going to hell!" She cried again, and another fat tear fell from her eye.

"Who's to say there even is a hell...?" Jack pointed out.

"Oh I know there is, I was raised on it," She let out a small sob, and tried to wipe her pink nose on the sleeve of her shift.

"Far be it for me to question the teachings of childhood, but Kat..." But she still continued ranting and raving.

"I lied to everyone in Port Royal. Everyone always felt this big vat of sympathy for me, because they thought I was kidnaped by pirates. I don't care what they would say if they found out I joined the account willingly, and wholeheartedly...but there were a few people I really cared about! And then, I got pregnant. I never wanted kids. I would rather not having them, to tell you the truth. I want to live my life without having a bunch of screaming brats at my feet all the time."

Now Jack was beginning to see where this was leading. Like all women, Katerina just needed to get it all out, squeeze out a few more tears, and all would be well(ish) again.

"And ever since I found out I was pregnant, I just had this pit of dread. I didn't want the child, and I would have gotten rid of it sooner if for the fact that it was Matthew's and he always wanted a baby. Every month after we got married I would sigh in relief when I got the menses. But I knew that as soon as I was five feet big in the belly, you would plop me down on some island and there would end the many swarthy adventures of Katerina Lancaster."

"Wait...what?" Jack blinked again. She thought that? "You thought I was going to just sit you down in an island and forget all about you? How in the wolrd could I forget about you? I was going to put you on land until you had the baby, then we would have worked something out after that."

"I thought you just wanted the treasure," Katerina sniffed. Jack was amazed at how much she looked like a small child lost on the many folds of the bed. He leaned back against one of the massive posts, and sighed heavily.

"Well yes, but Im not that heartless. You've grown on me, I suppose."

"Oh," She said softly. They sat in silence, until Jack remembered the recent events.

"Alright, you need to get some bloody rest, you hear? I'll take care of...the baby, don't worry. And I have a feeling your soul is just fine. Don't worry so much. Live a little."

"Ha!" Katerina snorted, wiggling down into the blankets once again, glad for their warmth, and the fire crackling cheerily in the fireplace. She hated the cold. That was one reason why she lived in the Caribbean. "That's easy when you're a man. When you're a woman, its never fun." She pulled the blankets up under her chin.

"You mean having sex?" Jack snorted with laughter, and stood up. "Get well, Katerina...I have a lot to teach you, and not just about piracy."